Daily Practice - July
 

July 1

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 153-
Ch- A Vision For You:
It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. The age of miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that!
Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out.

-Tom- As my sponsor and I read through these important paragraphs, a few items stood out:
1- Should you wish them above ALL else, and be Willing to make use of our Experience, we are Sure they will come.
2. Defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions.
So I have to be defeated by Alcoholism and then put my sobriety above everything else in my Life, if I want to obtain and maintain my sobriety.
That’s The Deal.
Anything short of that will not work for me and I suspect it will not work for you either.
I pray that today I have the Courage to put my sobriety first, above everything else in my Life

July 2

Practice of the Day
BB pg 45-
Ch4 We Agnostics:
Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But where and how were we to find this Power?
Well, that's exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem.........

-Tom- First of all, am I convinced that I cannot help myself, on my own power?
For me that was an easy answer: I could not stop drinking, on my own power. Also I could not stop hurting people that loved me and that I loved, on my own power. I tried really, really hard and it never worked.
Lack of Power was definitely my dilemma and I had to find a Power I could Live with that would enable me to stay sober and not hurt people that loved me.
But where and how would I find this Power that evaded me my entire life?
“Well that’s exactly what this book is about. It’s MAIN OBJECT is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem.”
I pray that today I remember that the only problem I have is doing the work that keeps me connected to my Higher Power.
I do the Work and He solves my problem.

July 3

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 66-67-
Ch 5- How It Works:
We turned back to the list, for it held the key to the future. We were prepared to look at it from an entirely different angle. We began to see that the world and its people really dominated us. In that state, the wrong-doing of others, fancied or real, had power to actually kill. How could we escape? We saw that these resentments must be mastered, but how? We could not wish them away any more than alcohol.
This was our course: We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick.
Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, "This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done."
We avoid retaliation or argument. We wouldn't treat sick people that way. If we do, we destroy our chance of being helpful. We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one.

-Tom- I remember the first time I practiced the 4th Step prayer for when I was offended.
I was in the 82nd’s static line Jumpmaster course in the early 90s. One of the instructors was a complete ass and had a “protector of the tab” approach, put me in his sights and offended me, on purpose, unwarranted.
My normal response (before sobriety) would be to smile at him, then find him off post on the weekend and beat his ass.
However, the thought of this paragraph jumped in my mind. So begrudgingly, halfheartedly, with attitude, I said the prayer, and it worked. I was still mad but did not feel the need or desire to retaliate. That was huge progress for a guy like me.
I pray that today I remember that I always have the Power of Choice to pray, remain quite, or leave quickly in order to not react to someone that is sick .

July 4

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 64-65-
Ch 5- How It Works:
Resentment is the "number one" offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physically. In dealing with resentments, we set them on paper. We listed people, institutions or principles with whom we were angry. We asked ourselves why we were angry. In most cases it was found that our self-esteem, our pocketbooks, our ambitions, our personal relationships
(including sex) were hurt or threatened. So we were sore. We were "burned up."
On our grudge list we set opposite each name our injuries. Was it our self-esteem, our security, our ambitions, our personal, or sex relations, which had been interfered with?

-Tom- doing my 4th Step under the guidance of my sponsor and the format of the directions in the BB, was one of the greatest things I had ever done in my life.
Many times on many occasions in my life, I had said to myself “why did I do that?” or “why did I act that way? Most of the time I did not really know why.
My information that I plugged into the 4th Step format, gave me all my “why’s” and that was critical for me.
For most of my life I just thought I was a rotten, damaged, mean, no good, son of a *****. While some of my actions said that was true, inside, it was not.
I was just sick; spiritually, mentally and physically.
Today I pray that I remember to focus my efforts on my spiritual malady first, Trust in my God, clean house and help others

July 5

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 40-41
Ch 3- More About Alcoholism:
Let him tell you about it: "I was much impressed with what you fellows said about alcoholism, and I frankly did not believe it would be possible for me to drink again. I rather appreciated your ideas about the subtle insanity which precedes the first drink, but I was confident it could not happen to me after what I had learned. I reasoned I was not so far advanced as most of you fellows, that I had been usually successful in licking my other personal problems, and that I would therefore be successful where you men failed. I felt I had every right to be self-confident, that it would be only a matter of exercising my will power and keeping on guard.
"In this frame of mind, I went about my business and for a time all was well. I had no trouble refusing drinks, and began to wonder if I had not been making too hard work of a simple matter. One day I went to Washington to present some accounting evidence to a government bureau. I had been out of town before during this particular dry spell, so there was nothing new about that. Physically, I felt fine. Neither did I have any pressing problems or worries. My business came off well, I was pleased and knew my partners would be too. It was the end of a perfect day, not a cloud on the horizon.
"I went to my hotel and leisurely dressed for dinner. As I crossed the threshold of the dining room, the thought came to mind that it would be nice to have a couple of cocktails with dinner. That was all. Nothing more.........

-Tom- Fishermen fish, carpenters build things, firefighters put out fires, alcoholics drink and drug addicts use drugs. No mystery in any of that, it’s simple, True and logical.
Good times, bad times, failure, success, happy, mad, sad, glad, rain or shine, day or night. I drink because I am an alcoholic.
Or, I choose Sobriety and do the actions that bring about those results that I want.
I pray that today I remember that I am without defense against the first drink. My defense must come from my Higher Power.

July 6

Practice of the Day-
BB pg -63-
Ch 5-How It Works:
(3rd Step Promises)
When we sincerely took such a position, all sorts of remarkable things followed. We had a new Employer. Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter. We were reborn.

-Tom- When my sponsor and I got to this point in the BB he said “you are are Real alcoholic and new to this way of life so your mindset is, what’s in it for me, what am I going to get from doing this 3rd Step?”
I said yeah, that’s exactly what I was thinking. He said “well AA says if you do these things, to the best of your ability, you are guaranteed to get the results that this paragraph is saying.
Do you want any of these results in your Life?”
I said yeah, wasn’t so sure of the foo foo stuff but I was down for some peace of mind, getting what I needed, facing life successfully and losing some of my fears.
He said, “ok then, that means yes, so we will Continue and then you can experience if it’s true or not.”
I told him that “reborn” crap I had already heard about in church and it never happened for me. He said well what does the word mean?
-reborn- Brought back to life or activity.
That definition, I wanted and could wrap my head around.
Today I pray that I stay close to Him and perform His Work well.

July 7

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 44-45
Ch 4 We Agnostics:
If a mere code of morals or a better philosophy of life were sufficient to overcome alcoholism, many of us would have recovered long ago. But we found that such codes and philosophies did not save us, no matter how much we tried. We could wish to be moral, we could wish to be philosophically comforted, in fact, we could will these things with all our might, but the needed power wasn't there. Our human resources, as marshalled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly.
Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But where and how were we to find this Power?
Well, that's exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem...........

-Tom- my sponsor asked me “do you completely understand and accept that the best you could do got you to your bottom? “
Begrudgingly, I said yes, it really made me angry but that didn’t take away from the fact that, on my own power, I failed.
He then said “ ok, since you don’t have the power to not drink and change your life, doesn’t it make logical sense that we will need to seek that Power, outside of yourself?”
I said yes.
We then Continued on with the reading.
I pray that today I remember that my only problem is staying close to my Higher Power. I stick with Him, do His Work and He solves my problem

July 8

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 18-19-
Ch 2- There Is A Solution:
But the ex-problem drinker who has found this solution, who is properly armed with facts about himself, can generally win the entire confidence of another alcoholic in a few hours. Until such an understanding is reached, little or nothing can be accomplished.
That the man who is making the approach has had the same difficulty, that he obviously knows what he is talking about, that his whole deportment shouts at the new prospect that he is a man with a real answer, that he has no attitude of Holier Than Thou, nothing whatever except the sincere desire to be helpful; that there are no fees to pay, no axes to grind, no people to please, no lectures to be endured-these are the conditions
we have found most effective. After such an approach many take up their beds and walk again.

-Tom- one of the most Powerful things my sponsor ever said to me was “Tom, you do not ever have to drink again if you don’t want to.”
He was looking at me dead in the eyes and said it with absolute confidence.
He didn’t say I wouldn’t think about it, or even at times I might want to. He said I did not have to. Alcoholics and addicts understand the difference
between the 2.
There were times before AA, that I absolutely had to drink, no matter what the potential consequence or situation, I had to have a drink.
This is another reason we only use “I” statements when sharing our experience, strength and hope.
After living the 12 Steps myself, I can look at a newcomer and guarantee them that they can stay sober just like me, we just have to follow
The Directions.
I pray that today I keep it Simple and follow Good Orderly Direction

July 9

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 64-65-
Ch 5- How It Works:
Resentment is the "number one" offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physically. In dealing with resentments, we set them on paper. We listed people, institutions or principles with whom we were angry. We asked ourselves why we were angry. In most cases it was found that our self-esteem, our pocketbooks, our ambitions, our personal relationships
(including sex) were hurt or threatened. So we were sore. We were "burned up."
On our grudge list we set opposite each name our injuries. Was it our self-esteem, our security, our ambitions, our personal, or sex relations, which had been interfered with?

-Tom- doing my 4th Step under the guidance of my sponsor and the format of the directions in the BB, was one of the greatest things I had ever done in my life.
Many times on many occasions in my life, I had said to myself “why did I do that?” or “why did I act that way? Most of the time I did not really know why.
My information that I plugged into the 4th Step format, gave me all my “why’s” and that was critical for me.
For most of my life I just thought I was a rotten, damaged, mean, no good, son of a *****. While some of my actions said that was true, inside, it was not. I was just sick; spiritually, mentally and physically.
Today I pray that I remember to focus my efforts on my spiritual malady first, then mental and physical.

July 10

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 103-
Ch 7- Working With Others:
We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone. Every new alcoholic looks for this spirit among us and is immensely relieved when he finds we are not witch burners. A spirit of intolerance might repel alcoholics whose lives could have been saved, had it not been for such stupidity. We would not even do the cause of temperate drinking any good, for not one drinker in a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it.
Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it.
After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!

-Tom- My sponsor would always say “it’s easy to be Sober in an AA meeting. The real question is what is my attitude and how do I behave outside of the meetings? Am I a good example of a member of Alcoholics Anonymous when no other AA member is around?”
I can ask myself, have I stopped fighting everybody and everything?
If your answer is yes, then Continue to enjoy the the Fruits of doing Steps 10,11,12.
If your answer is no, then stop what you are doing, write a Gratitude list and get with your sponsor and revisit steps 10 and 11.
I pray that today I am Given the ability to be a solid member of Alcoholics Anonymous, in attitude, word and deed.

July 11

Practice of the Day BB pg 72,73
Ch 6- Into Action
(5th Step)
This is perhaps difficult-especially discussing our defects with another person. We think we have done well enough in admitting these things to ourselves. There is doubt about that. In actual practice, we usually find a solitary self-appraisal insufficient. Many of us thought it necessary to go much further. We will be more reconciled to discussing ourselves with another person when we see good reasons why we should do so. The best reason first: If we skip this vital step, we may not overcome drinking. Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives. Trying to avoid this humbling experience, they have turned to easier methods. Almost invariably they got drunk. Having persevered with the rest of the program, they wondered why they fell. We think the reason is that they never completed their housecleaning. They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock. They only thought they had lost their egoism and fear; they only thought they had humbled themselves. But they had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness and honesty, in the sense we find it necessary, until they told someone else all their life story.

-Tom- In any and every aspect of Life, there is one action that changes all things around it.
That action is COURAGE.
Displayed Acts of Courage demand that we cheer, stand up from our seats and yell **** yeah!!! We can’t stop ourselves from doing it because we have just witnessed someone laying it ALL on the line and going for it.
It doesn’t matter if it is in a sport, singing, dancing or War.
An act of Courage displayed by an individual Changes the Game.
The 5th Step is my Opportunity to act Courageously and begin to change the game of my Life.
I pray that today I be Given the Strength to Act with Courage and not be a coward.

July 12

Practice of the Day
BB pg 55-
Ch 4-We Agnostics
Yet we had been seeing another kind of flight, a spiritual liberation from this world, people who rose above their problems. They said God made these things possible, and we only smiled. We had seen spiritual release, but liked to tell ourselves it wasn't true.
Actually we were fooling ourselves, for deep down in every man, woman, and child, is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other things, but in some form or other it is there. For faith in a Power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself.
We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up, just as much as the feeling we have for a friend. Sometimes we had to search fearlessly, but He was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He may be found. It was so with us.

-Tom- When my sponsor and I started reading this chapter he said “this chapter was not put in here to prove that there is a God. It was put in here so that we might open our minds and allow God to prove that He is God.
This chapter also will tell us exactly where we can find God”. I said ok.
For me, chapter 4, had the greatest impact on my early sobriety because it challenged everything I had ever heard or thought, about God.
Which was very needed.
I pray that today I Remember I do not need to agree with your conception of a Higher Power, I just have to agree with mine.

July 13

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 82-
Ch- Into Action:
If we have no such complication, there is plenty we should do at home. Sometimes we hear an alcoholic say that the only thing he needs to do is to keep sober. Certainly he must keep sober, for there will be no home if he doesn’t. But he is yet a long way from making good to the wife or parents whom for years he has so shockingly treated. Passing all understanding is the patience mothers and wives have had with alcoholics. Had this not been so, many of us would have no homes today, would perhaps be dead.
The alcoholic is like a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others. Hearts are broken. Sweet relationships are dead. Affections have been uprooted. Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the home in turmoil. We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough. He is like the farmer who came up out of his cyclone cellar to find his home ruined. To his wife, he remarked, “Don’t see anything the matter here, Ma. Ain’t it grand the wind stopped blowin?”

-Tom- my sponsor set me straight from the beginning “Tom, we don’t get any pats on the back for being Grateful, doing our step work, taking direction from our sponsor, going to meetings or working with other alcoholics.
All of that just puts us in a position to live in a manner in which we should have been doing all along. We have a lot of work to do to make things right in our lives and there are many who need the opportunity we were Given”
I can ask myself “ do the people in my life hold me accountable and inspire me to be and do better?
Or do they buy into my bull**** and let me get away with not being accountable and feel sorry for me?”
Today I pray that I have the Courage to choose wisely, the company that I keep.

July 14

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 86-
Ch- Into Action:
On awakening let us think about the 24 hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ or mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.

-Tom- this is some of the morning directions for the 11th step. It is important to actually have done all the Work in steps 1-10 to receive and obtain the full benefits of this step.
It is only here, in the 11th that I am actually given permission to think again.
Steps 1-10 just give me precise clear cut instructions on what actions to take.
Many members, especially those that have been sober a bit, just start doing what they think is best now that they have been sober a while.
When the Gift of Desperation is gone, Discipline must show up, or Desperation will return.
I am Grateful that there is no scorecard, test to take, or deep understandings to decipher. I just have to continue to follow the Good Orderly Directions of the step I am on.
I can ask myself “am I following the directions for the 11th step out of the BB?”
If the answer is yes, then I can Continue.
If the answer is no, then I must stop and do it.
(It only takes 6 minutes in case you were wondering how to fit this practice into your busy schedule)
I pray that today I just follow the directions and don’t buy into how smart I think I am.

July 15

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 25-
Ch-2- There Is A Solution:
There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet. We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed.
The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God's universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves.

-Tom- When I first met up with my sponsor he said to me “there is only one thing that you have to to change”
I said that’s great, what is the one thing I have to change?
He said “your whole ****ing Life”.
I said at times I had tried to do that and it never worked.
He said, “me too. How about we just follow these directions and see what happens?” I said, ok, I don’t have anything more to lose.
That first paragraph has a lot of hard core courageous **** in it. Sounds like a lot more than just staying dry, going to meetings and hanging out with sober people.
Today I pray that I am Given the Courage and Willingness to follow the Directions of the Steps.

July 16

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 101-102
Ch- Working With Others:
So our rule is not to avoid a place where there is drinking, if we have a legitimate reason for being there. That includes bars, nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings and plain ordinary whoopee parties. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isn’t.
You will note that we made an important qualification. Therefore ask yourself on each occasion, “Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little vicarious pleasure from the atmosphere of such places?” If you answer these questions satisfactorily, you need have no apprehension. Go or stay away, whichever seems best. But be sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive in going is thoroughly good. Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it. But if you are shaky, you had better work with another alcoholic instead!

-Tom- it is most important to note where this information is contained in the process. These are part of the directions for the 12th step, which means that I have completed my 9th step and attempting to live 10,11, 12, on a daily basis.
In early sobriety I was too afraid to walk into the gas station to buy Copenhagen because I had never walked by a beer cooler without getting some. Later in my sobriety I would find myself sitting in crack house that had drugs, booze and guns, reading the BB with a sponsee in a rough spot. Following the directions in the above paragraphs and double checking with my sponsor.
The point is that if I follow the directions of the 12 steps and information in the BB, I can walk this earth a Free man. That is what I always wanted and still desire most, Freedom. That is why I got Sober, to Live Free.
Today I pray that I live the Life my God wants me to Live: Happy, Joyous and Free

July 17

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 52-
Ch 4- We Agnostics:
We had to ask ourselves why we shouldn't apply to our human problems this same readiness to change our point of view. We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other people - was not a basic solution of these bedevilments more important than whether we should see newsreels of lunar flight? Of course it was.
When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the God idea did.

-Tom- as my sponsor and I were reading together he would often stop and ask me if I could relate to what we were reading. We would sometimes have long discussions about a simple paragraph. He would often tell me stories how he related to a paragraph. He said he did that to make sure that I knew, that I could relate to what these first 100 Recovered Alcoholics were saying.
If I couldn’t relate, why would I keep going?
This logical and practical approach to sobriety, spirituality and problem solving was very attractive to me and kept me engaged in sobriety, still.
I can ask myself “are my ideas and how I move through life working to keep me sober, at peace and content?”
If your answer is yes, then Continue. What you are doing is working to bring you Sobriety, peace and contentment.
If your answer is no, first of all, welcome to the Club. Second, stop doing what you are doing and try what we are doing. You have nothing to lose.
I pray that today I am willing, honest and open minded enough to live a life worth living, to me.

July 18

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 16-
Ch 1, Bills Story:
An alcoholic in his cups is an unlovely creature. Our struggles with them are variously strenuous, comic, and tragic. One poor chap committed suicide in my home. He could not or would not see our way of life.
There is, however, a vast amount of fun about it all. I suppose some would be shocked at our seeming worldliness and levity. But just underneath there is deadly earnestness. Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish.
Most of us feel we need look no further for Utopia. We have it with us right here and now. Each day my friend’s simple talk in our kitchen multiplies itself in a widening circle of peace on earth and good will to men.

-Tom- “an alcoholic in his cups is an unlovely creature”. For me, that is really churching it up. I was an absolute Monster. I brought to AA nothing but hate, anger, violence, aggressive attitude, rebellion and a bunch more not good stuff.
Y’all took me in and showed me the only thing could penetrate all those walls; human kindness and genuine unconditional Love.
Also, y’all did not accept unacceptable behavior. You didn’t kick me out or abandon me. You said,
”keep coming back”it was constant and baffling to me, and the only thing I did not have a defense against. It broke me.
You see all the acts we do in AA; sweeping floors, making coffee, giving people rides, listening to someone share, greeting people at the door, cleaning the bathroom at the meeting hall, sponsorship, helping people move, cutting people’s grass, late night talks, etc
All of these and much more, are,
Acts of Love.
In AA, we do Love. We don’t talk about it, think about it or preach about it,
We Do it.
I can ask myself “am I doing acts of Love with those who’s space I occupy?”
If your answer is yes, then Continue to do your acts of Love and enjoy the Happiness and contentment those acts bring.
If your answer is no, then write a Gratitude list and do something for someone without them knowing who did it, and see what that experience feels like.
Today I pray that I remember

July 19

Practice of the day- BB pg 14-15-
Ch-1- Bills Story
“While I lay in the hospital the thought came that there were thousands of hopeless alcoholics who might be glad to have what had been so freely given me. Perhaps I could help some of them. They in turn might work with others.
My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then Faith would be dead indeed.
With us it is just like that.”

-Tom- The first 100 constantly bring up the Truth that sobriety is not free. “Through work and self-sacrifice for others” that’s not just work, that is hard work, difficult and takes up my time.
And that is the Deal, I can take it or leave it, but I cannot change it.
I can ask myself “ am I working to enlarge my Spiritual Life in the way the Steps say to?”
If the answer is yes, then I continue.
If the answer is no, then I need to call my sponsor and get to work.
I pray that for today I am given the Desire to enlarge my Spiritual Life and sacrifice my time for others, to the best of my ability.

July 20

Practice of the day-
BB pg 58
Ch- How It Works:
Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened and what we are like now.
If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it—then you are ready to take certain steps.
At some of these we balked. We thought we could find an easier, softer way. But we could not. With all the earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely.

-Tom- I wanted John H to be my sponsor, so I asked him to be. In turn, he asked me “are you willing to go to any lengths for victory over alcoholism” and “are you willing to do whatever I ask you to do?” He asked me that one evening and of course I immediately said yes because I was really whipped this time. He said, “no, I want you to think about this tonight and give me your answer in the morning, it’s a big decision.”
The 12 steps are a
“all in” deal. It’s the Only way it works, if you desire to stay sober in AA.
It’s just like the card game Texas hold’em: you can ante up, place a few bets, play a bit, but at some point you will have to go “all in”. If you don’t go “all in” you are out of the game.
Sobriety is the same way.
I can ask myself “am I trying to hold on to any of my old ideas?”
If the answer is yes, then work with your sponsor and follow the process of the steps, wherever you are in them. Letting go absolutely is a gift we get by living the steps 1-12.
If your answer is no, then Continue to Live Free from the bondage of self.
I pray that today I live a life of rigorous honesty and live in the present.

July 21

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 50-
Ch 4- We Agnostics:
In our personal stories you will find a wide variation in the way each teller approaches and conceives of the Power which is greater than himself. Wether we agree with a particular approach or conception seems to make little difference. Experience has taught us that these are matters about which, for our purpose, we need not be worried.
On one proposition, however, these men and women are strikingly agreed. Everyone of them has gained access to, and believes in, a Power greater than himself. This Power has in each case accomplished the miraculous, the humanly impossible. As a celebrated American statesman put it “let’s look at the record.”

-Tom- it was relieving to know that I did not have to solve my alcoholism. I just had to find My own Higher Power, and He solved the problem. All I had to do was the Step work and follow the directions of my Sponsor.
The Process of doing and practicing all 12 Steps, removes the parts of my self concept that no longer serve me or support the Life I am attempting to live today.
I pray that today I have the Willingness to do the work that is necessary to acquire a conscious contact with my Higher Power, and allow Him to solve my problem.

July 22

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 93-
Ch-7- Working With Others:
..........Stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to agree with your conception of God. He can choose any conception he likes, provided it makes sense to him. The main thing is that he be willing to believe in a Power greater than himself and that he live by spiritual principles.
When dealing with such a person, you had better use everyday language to describe spiritual principles. There is no use arousing any prejudice he may have against certain theological terms and conceptions about which he may already be confused. Don't raise such issues, no matter what your own convictions are.

-Tom- For me, I will be Forever Grateful that my Sponsor followed these 2 paragraphs in “working with others” when he was working with me. He was following the directions in the BB and so was I. It’s called the dumb guy approach, just do what the book says to do, when it says to do it.
My sponsor was/is a Christian. He follows the teachings of Jesus Christ and went to church. However he Never imparted his beliefs onto me, he said, like the book said, I had to find my own God. The God of the Hopeless alcoholic that would help me personally.
The reason why that was important was my head was full of all kinds of prejudice, false information and failed attempts of connecting with God. For me, just mentioning theological terms brought up an emotional fury and I would shut down without even trying to.
My sponsor said let’s approach this from a practical sense: don’t talk about AA in church and don’t talk about church in AA. Practice being where you are not bringing one into the other. Keep it simple and enjoy both.
I pray that today I have the ability to keep it simple, be where I am, allow others to be where they are and enjoy all that Sobriety has Given me.

July 23

Practice of the day-
BB pg 77-78
Ch- Into Action
(some directions for 9th Step, Amends)
Under no condition do we criticize such a person or argue. Simply we tell him that we will never get over drinking until we have done our utmost to straighten out the past. We are there to sweep off our side of the street, realizing that nothing worth while can be accomplished until we do so, never trying to tell him what he should do. His faults are not discussed. We stick to our own. If our manner is calm, frank, and open, we will be gratified with the results.
In nine cases out of ten the unexpected happens. Sometimes the man we are calling upon admits his own fault, so feuds of years’ standing melt away in an hour. Rarely do we fail to make satisfactory progress. Our former enemies sometimes praise what we are doing and wish us well. Occasionally they will offer assistance. It should not matter, however, if someone does throw us out of his office. We have made our demonstration, done our part. It’s water over the ****.

-Tom- The actions of the 9th step is where the rubber meets the road. Do I really mean what I say? Do I really trust My Creator? Do I really trust the process of the 12 Steps?
The answer is in our actions.
If I am doing my amends, then the answer is a loud and thundering yes. If I am not, then it is a whimpering no, and I am in a lot of trouble and don’t even know it.
Doing a hard amends is a tremendous act of Courage. Acts of Courage change Everything, especially ourselves.
It is important for me to know what courage feels like before and during the act. In my experience courage feels horrible, anxiety, worry, over thinking, fear,nausea ,etc..............However after the Courageous act it only feels like one thing.......Freedom
I must always remember why I must make amends. It’s not forgiveness. It’s not because they deserve it. It is so that I can be Free of it and move on to a better Life for me and my Family.
Do I want to be right, or do I want to be Free?
Today I pray that I have the Courage to do what I need to do, and continue to grow, with Grace.

July 24

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 82-
Ch- Into Action:
If we have no such complication, there is plenty we should do at home. Sometimes we hear an alcoholic say that the only thing he needs to do is to keep sober. Certainly he must keep sober, for there will be no home if he doesn’t. But he is yet a long way from making good to the wife or parents whom for years he has so shockingly treated. Passing all understanding is the patience mothers and wives have had with alcoholics. Had this not been so, many of us would have no homes today, would perhaps be dead.
The alcoholic is like a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others. Hearts are broken. Sweet relationships are dead. Affections have been uprooted. Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the home in turmoil. We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough. He is like the farmer who came up out of his cyclone cellar to find his home ruined. To his wife, he remarked, “Don’t see anything the matter here, Ma. Ain’t it grand the wind stopped blowin?”

-Tom- my sponsor set me straight from the beginning “Tom, we don’t get any pats on the back for being Grateful, doing our step work, taking direction from our sponsor, going to meetings or working with other alcoholics.
All of that just puts us in a position to live in a manner in which we should have been doing all along. We have a lot of work to do to make things right in our lives and there are many who need the opportunity we were Given”
I can ask myself “ do the people in my life hold me accountable and inspire me to be and do better?
Or do they buy into my bull**** and let me get away with not being accountable and feel sorry for me?”
There is a saying, not in the BB, that says:
Show me who you spend your time with, and that will show me your future.
Today I pray that I have the Courage to choose wisely, the company that I keep.

July 25

Practice of the Day BB pg XVii
Foreword to the Second edition:
Hence the two men set to work almost frantically upon alcoholics arriving in the ward of the Akron City Hospital. Their very first case, a desperate one. recovered immediately and became A.A. number three. He never had another drink. This work at Akron continued through the summer of 1935. There were many failures, but there was an occasional heartening success. When the broker returned to New York in the fall of 1935, the first A.A. group had actually been formed, though no one realized it at the time.
A second small group promptly took shape at New York, to be followed in 1937 with the start of a third at Cleveland. Besides these, there were scattered alcoholics who had picked up the basic ideas in Akron or New York who were trying to form groups in other cities. By late 1937, the number of members having substantial sobriety time behind them was sufficient to convince the membership that a new light had entered the dark world of the alcoholic.
It was now time, the struggling groups thought, to place their message and unique experience before the world. This determination bore fruit in the spring of 1939 by the publication of this volume. The membership had then reached about 100 men and women. The fledgling society, which had been nameless, now began to be called Alcoholics Anonymous, from the title of its own book. The flying-blind period ended and A.A. entered a new phase of its pioneering time.

-Tom- before there was any AA, there was only jails, institutions and death for alcoholics and addicts.
Recovery didn’t exist in large numbers.
The First 100 recovered alcoholics brought Light into this dark world.
Today I pray that I remember all the hard work that others have done to provide me an opportunity to be sober.

July 26

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 153-
Ch- A Vision For You:
It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. The age of miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that!
Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out.

-Tom- As my sponsor and I read through these important paragraphs, a few items stood out:
1- Should you wish them above ALL else, and be Willing to make use of our Experience, we are Sure they will come.
2. Defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions.
So I have to be defeated by Alcoholism and then put my sobriety above everything else in my Life, if I want to obtain and maintain my sobriety.
That’s The Deal.
Anything short of that will not work for me and I suspect it will not work for you either.
I pray that today I have the Courage to put my sobriety first, above everything else in my Life.

July 27

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 66-67-
Ch 5- How It Works:
We turned back to the list, for it held the key to the future. We were prepared to look at it from an entirely different angle. We began to see that the world and its people really dominated us. In that state, the wrong-doing of others, fancied or real, had power to actually kill. How could we escape? We saw that these resentments must be mastered, but how? We could not wish them away any more than alcohol.
This was our course: We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick.
Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, "This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done."
We avoid retaliation or argument. We wouldn't treat sick people that way. If we do, we destroy our chance of being helpful. We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one.

-Tom- I remember the first time I practiced the 4th Step prayer for when I was offended.
I was in the 82nd’s static line Jumpmaster course in the early 90s. One of the instructors was a complete ass and had a “protector of the tab” approach, put me in his sights and offended me, on purpose, unwarranted.
My normal response (before sobriety) would be to smile at him, then find him off post on the weekend and beat his ass.
However, the thought of this paragraph jumped in my mind. So begrudgingly, halfheartedly, with attitude, I said the prayer, and it worked. I was still mad but did not feel the need or desire to retaliate. That was huge progress for a guy like me.
I pray that today I remember that I always have the Power of Choice to pray, remain quite, or leave quickly in order to not react to someone that is sick .

July 28

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 66-67-
Ch 5- How It Works:
We turned back to the list, for it held the key to the future. We were prepared to look at it from an entirely different angle. We began to see that the world and its people really dominated us. In that state, the wrong-doing of others, fancied or real, had power to actually kill. How could we escape? We saw that these resentments must be mastered, but how? We could not wish them away any more than alcohol.
This was our course: We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick.
Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, "This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done."
We avoid retaliation or argument. We wouldn't treat sick people that way. If we do, we destroy our chance of being helpful. We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one.

-Tom- I remember the first time I practiced the 4th Step prayer for when I was offended.
I was in the 82nd’s static line Jumpmaster course in the early 90s. One of the instructors was a complete ass and had a “protector of the tab” approach, put me in his sights and offended me, on purpose, unwarranted.
My normal response (before sobriety) would be to smile at him, then find him off post on the weekend and beat his ass.
However, the thought of this paragraph jumped in my mind. So begrudgingly, halfheartedly, with attitude, I said the prayer, and it worked. I was still mad but did not feel the need or desire to retaliate. That was huge progress for a guy like me.
I pray that today I remember that I always have the Power of Choice to pray, remain quite, or leave quickly in order to not react to someone that is sick .

July 29

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 151-152-
Ch 11- A Vision For You:
Now and then a serious drinker, being dry at the moment says, "I don't miss it at all. Feel better. Work better. Having a better time." As ex-problem drinkers, we smile at such a sally. We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits. He fools himself. Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, for he isn't happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.

-Tom- My sponsor explained to me that Sobriety, AA and the 12 Steps were serious business. If I was not serious about getting sober, don’t waist my time or his with some half ass effort. He asked me if I could relate to that paragraph? I said yes.
At 62 days without drinking, only going to meetings and reading the BB by myself, I made it to my jumping-off place.
I truly did not want to drink anymore and I wanted a drink so bad I couldn’t stand it, so I jumped. I jumped 100% and then some, into The Program and Fellowship of AA.
That is the Only reason why, I am Sober today.
I can ask myself “am I happy about my sobriety?”
If your answer is yes, then Continue and help another Alcoholic to achieve sobriety.
If your answer is no, then realize you are in a dangerous spot. Write a Gratitude list, pray to your Higher Power, meet with your sponsor, do some Steps, go to a meeting and help another alcoholic to achieve sobriety. At the end of that, I guarantee you will be happy about your sobriety.
Today I pray for the Strength to practice these Principles in all of my affairs.

July 30

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 103-
Ch 7- Working With Others:
We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone. Every new alcoholic looks for this spirit among us and is immensely relieved when he finds we are not witch burners. A spirit of intolerance might repel alcoholics whose lives could have been saved, had it not been for such stupidity. We would not even do the cause of temperate drinking any good, for not one drinker in a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it.
Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it.
After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!

-Tom- My sponsor would always say “it’s easy to be Sober in an AA meeting. The real question is what is my attitude and how do I behave outside of the meetings? Am I a good example of a member of Alcoholics Anonymous when no other AA member is around?”
I can ask myself, have I stopped fighting everybody and everything?
If your answer is yes, then Continue to enjoy the the Fruits of doing Steps 10,11,12.
If your answer is no, then stop what you are doing, write a Gratitude list and get with your sponsor and revisit steps 10 and 11.
I pray that today I am Given the ability to be a solid member of Alcoholics Anonymous, in attitude, word and deed.

July 31

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 64-65-
Ch 5- How It Works:
Resentment is the "number one" offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physically. In dealing with resentments, we set them on paper. We listed people, institutions or principles with whom we were angry. We asked ourselves why we were angry. In most cases it was found that our self-esteem, our pocketbooks, our ambitions, our personal relationships
(including sex) were hurt or threatened. So we were sore. We were "burned up."
On our grudge list we set opposite each name our injuries. Was it our self-esteem, our security, our ambitions, our personal, or sex relations, which had been interfered with?

-Tom- doing my 4th Step under the guidance of my sponsor and the format of the directions in the BB, was one of the greatest things I had ever done in my life.
Many times on many occasions in my life, I had said to myself “why did I do that?” or “why did I act that way? Most of the time I did not really know why.
My information that I plugged into the 4th Step format, gave me all my “why’s” and that was critical for me.
For most of my life I just thought I was a rotten, damaged, mean, no good, son of a *****. While some of my actions said that was true, inside, it was not. I was just sick; spiritually, mentally and physically.
Today I pray that I remember to focus my efforts on my spiritual malady first, then mental and physical.