Tuesday, August 13, 2013
You are reading from the book Touchstones
There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity. People who do not experience self-love have little or no capacity to love others.
—Nathaniel Branden
We cannot hang on to feelings of shame and guilt and still hope to become better people. How did these feelings begin? If we were treated badly by people, we need to be honest about what happened so we can resolve it and move on. Have we perpetuated our feelings by acting disrespectfully ourselves? Then we need to take a thorough inventory of our wrongdoings, admit them, make repairs, and let them go.
We may wallow in shame because facing it feels too frightening. Often, we believe our shame is greater than that of others. This belief is usually untrue and grandiose. It's part of how we isolate ourselves. We don't have to face it alone. We have the help of other men and women who can listen to our pain and tell us about their experiences.
Today, may I find the courage to face my shame and assert my right to self-esteem.
Like these readings, we tend to forget that we have a masculine and feminine side. I did a meditation one time, and it said, "Your female side is languishing. It broke me up, was never too fond of frilly and fussy things. The end of the week, a friend in recovery brought me clothes that she could no longer wear. She had put weight on and I had lost it. They contained dresses and skirts. 
Our masculine side is our survivor side, and in today, I don't want to just survive, I want to live.