Just for today, I will reach out to my God and ask for help. The last two days have been ones of pain and I need to accept and process it as to whether it is in reality mental, emotional, and/or physical. Today was a day of rest. I feel guilty when that happens, even though I got some dishes done, went down to the mall and got money on my laundry cards and picked up my Blister Pack with my weekly medications.

I don't like it when I can't concentrate enough to read. As a result, I watched TV when my pain wouldn't let me sleep.

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Just for today, I will reach out to my God and ask for help. The last two days have been ones of pain and I need to accept and process it as to whether it is in reality mental, emotional, and/or physical. Today was a day of rest. I feel guilty when that happens, even though I got some dishes done, went down to the mall and got money on my laundry cards and picked up my Blister Pack with my weekly medications.

I don't like it when I can't concentrate enough to read. As a result, I watched TV when my pain wouldn't let me sleep.

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Just for today, I will remember that I am not in charge. I will remember that today is one of change. Just because I have done things for 74 years or 25 years, doesn't mean that what worked in the past, serves me in today. If I have done things that long without change, there is a good chance that I have become complacent, and it is time to look at where I am at and what do I need to change in my life to see what is no longer working.

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Just for today, I will get out of the "I" and get with the "We." Getting out of self is so important. I must remember it isn't all about me. There are others who have issues much worse than mine. I will try not to resent that my son gave me his cold. ;) When he is sick, he is like a bear. He didn't go to work today. This is my second morning, the other one was my goodnight.

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Just for today, I will accept my limitations. Today I took a taxi to and from my chiropractor's appointment. I had planned to go to the library on my way home and realized that I would be stressing my body too much to go to the mall. The mall is about two blocks wide and the library is at the back of the mall near the market, which isn't open on Wednesdays. The two books are not overdue yet, but getting close. Haven't even checked to see if I had books to pick up. I will hopefully have more energy tomorrow on my way home from my group and before I go to the Hollisstic Center. I am so looking forward to going as my hip is out and I am hoping to get a treatment on my legs that will help me to release the fluid from the Edema. I was asked today about support stockings. I bought them, but don't have enough strength in my hands to pull them on. I have to find an alternative solution, and the Hollistic Center is it.

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Just for today, I will stay in the moment. I will turn my day over to my Higher Power and await His Guidance. I will go with the flow and takes things as they come. As they say, "I can make plans, but not plan the outcome." Have found many times that my God and I are not always on the same page. It is hard to believe I wrote this, then went to Angelwinks site and got the following picture.

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Just for today, I will put aside envy of those who have transportation to where they want to go when they want to get there. I made a step toward this when I renewed my Dart membership. I just have to be careful to not build up a resentment as their service is slow and I don't do waiting well. So grateful that this program is one day at a time.

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Just for today, I will be patient and accepting. People are where they are at and I can't change them. I am waiting for my sister to call, don't have a clue as to when she will call, so don't want to leave home until I hear from her. Just trying to stay in the moment and not take on other people's stuff.

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Just for today, I pray for patience and tolerance. I guy came into the laundry room. He said, "Your clothers are finished if you are in #1 washer. I went over, and started to put them into a dryer. He handed me the cloths that I left behind in the dryer. I said, "Don't touch my clothes." I realized that I had raised my voice, I am generally soft spoken, but the words didn't come out that way. He said, "I was just trying to help." For me, his intent was to get my stuff out so he could get his in because he was in a hurray and not about helping me. I maybe wrong, but by the time I had the dryer started, his clothes were in and he was out the door. I didn't know the man. I had never seen him in the building before. I felt like he was intruding into my space.

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Just for today, I am very grateful. I am getting to see my sister who lives in Tweed, which is about a four hour drive from me. She is three years younger than me and the middle sister. I would go visit her but she has cats, so I would not be able to visit her for very long.

Grateful to be going out even though it is raining. Will take my umbrella and cane, and if I am lucky, I will get me from the door to the car and back.

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Just for today, I will try not to take my pain out on someone else. It isn't their stuff, even if it is, it is best to send the energy back out to the Universe instead of returning to sender. Just say a prayer for them and yourself.

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Just for today, I will not preach my program. I will share my experience, strength, and hope, with the hope that it will help someone else. It is attraction rather than promotion. Hopefully someone will find something with me and my recovery, that will interest them to find recovery for themselves.

If I am so full of myself, I won't have any room for any one else. I don't have to have the last word, I don't have to say, "This is how it is done." It is not right to say to someone, "That is not how it is done, you need to do this," especially if what they are doing is keeping them clean and sober, with emphasis on the clean.

I need what will get me through the day, not abusing my medical medication, myself or others. I can't crave something if I don't injest it, and yet my mind can obsess about it and take me out of the moment, be it big or small. Thank God for the tools of recovery that bring us back to where we need to be in today.

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Just for today, I am grateful for my recovery. As I shared with a couple of newcomers yesterday, the person that walked through the doors of AA 25 years ago is no longer. That person does not exist, thank God. Even the lady likes to come out today and I don't get angry at her and tell her to go away.

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Just for today, I will trust my God to see me through the next few days. My son informed me that the weatherman said that the end of our rain fall, they expect 55 mm of rain to fall. Oh my acking body! Mind you it generally hurts more before the rain start and spoils my sunshine, although today we had both. I could not go out, my feet wouldn't let me walk farther than from my kitchen to my bedroom and bathroom. I was grateful that my apartment is small. I have already taken time to do a meditation and ask for help and healing. I am not suppose to take anti-inflamatories, because of my kidneys. I took one this afternoon, hoping that one a day for a short term, will help. I got the thought after the meditation, so more will be revealed.

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Just for today, I will try to be more tolerant. I realize that I have been a little too judgmental about certain things. Mainly people who complain about the same thing over and over again, and do nothing about it. It may sound like I do that, but each day is a new pain, it doesn't always come in the same shape and format. It can be my heart, my diabetes, my arthritis, my spine, my neck, etc. LOL!

I was talking to Tony at the Holistic Center today about how we go through a grieving process every time there is change in our life. I realized that I had forgotten about that and need to practice what I preach. Wasn't too tolerant of myself today. I told him I felt like a real ditz, not sure of the spelling. Things were not computing and not coming out in the way I wanted to say them. That is why I had him work on my neck as I had a pinched nerve.

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Just for today, I will pray for patience. I was waiting for the bus and it didn't come. A woman was wearing sandals and her feet were really cold. She waited 45 min. I was there about 30 min. and it didn't come. According to the schedule it was due 5 min. after I got to the stop. We finally got on another bus, got off a stop earlier and started to walk 4 blocks for each of us. Just as we got to the street, our bus came along and if we had waited about 5 min. longer, we could have caught it. She was just so cold, so we got on the bus so she could warm up a bit and I walked a block from her home. She went one way and I another, each having a block further to walk. I knew it was due, but I was worried about her. When we got off the bus, it was me the guys offered to help and asked her if I was alright. Go figure! LOL!

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Just for today, I will try to practice my patience and put into affect detaching from my alcoholic. At the moment, he would try the patience of Job. It is about everyone else, not about him and wondering why he is so hard done by. God is on top of the list, it didn't rain in the summer and his hours were cut and now it is raining now and he has been missing days. He works in landscaping, and it is difficult to work if the grass doesn't grow. No hours, no money to use. He still brings up my addiction from his past and likes to play the blame game. It is hard not to take some of it on, but I can't continue to pay for my mistakes, I can only move on, and I have been trying to do that, one day at a time for 25 years.

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Just for today, I will be strong and do what I need to do for myself. It is raining, so I can't run away from my dishes. I did two loads of laundry last night. My strength comes from the God of my understanding. I had a late start to the day, but did get quite a lot of sleep the last couple of days. I bought some iron pills, and they seem to be slowly giving me more umph, to get things done. It was one of those God moments the way I see it. I wasn't looking for them, had no thought of them, and all of a sudden they were there in front of me staring back at me. I am hoping they will help with the fatigue. Praying and asking for help and open to receiving and all of a sudden, there it was. I don't argue with things that happen like that.

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Just for today, I will try to be my own best friend and give myself a hug. Starting your day at 6:30 p.m. isn't such a good thing. I will watch my favourite shows tonight and hopefully, when bedtime comes, I will be able to sleep.

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Just for today, I will remember hugs not drugs and give someone a hug today.

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Just for today, I will be open to receive the gifts my Higher Power sends to me. They come in all shapes and sizes, and when I pray and ask for help, I need to be open to receive what He feels that I need. Like the connection today of a long time Al-Anon member who came to my group, plus another woman who I hadn't seen at our group, I asked her if she was new, just in case. She wasn't, but I thought I would ask just in case. I was able to share with her before she left the group to go back to work. Those are gifts of a different colour, and always helps me. The words that I spoke to her where words that I needed for my own journey in today. We can do what I can't do alone.

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Just for today, I will look to be accepting of what is going on in my life. It isn't about acccepting my alcoholism or my drug of choice which is more, it is about accepting life on life's terms.

I have had a lot of pain lately, my Fibromyalgia has come out of remission and I know that a lot of the physical pain is a result of emotions that need to be processed. As they say, "I have to feel them in order to let them go." In order to do that, I need to find the acceptance first or I will stay stuck. Why hang onto things when it is so much better to let go of them. Not always easier, but definitely more condusive to serenity.

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Just for today, I will practice my program to the best of my ability. I will try to be the best me that I can be in today. I will say the Third and Seventh Step Prayers to helpp me get out of the way and allow my God to work through me, instead of having to work around me or inspite of me, He offers His Love and Grace.

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Just for today, I will be content and happy in today. I won't look for what is wrong but focus on what is right. I will look at what I have instead of looking at what I don't have. That doesn't mean that I don't want to win the lottery, although I seldom buy a ticket. I would like to win enough to move out of my apartment building, but then, wherever I go, I take me with me. Part of me doesn't want to move because I can still walk to the library and the market. I just don't feel safe any more around Hess Village and going out at night. It is something that I have been praying about, and if I am meant to be here, then that is okay. Again, acceptance is the key.

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Just for today, I will accept what is in the moment. It is so important for me to stay in today, especially when it comes to my health issues and my son's active addiction. I am so grateful for the program. Just for today, I don't have to use, no matter what.

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Just for today, I will let go of the negative attitude. I won't shut down and isolate myself from others. When I closed down, I block myself from my God as well as others.

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Just for today, I will pray for what I need and ask that what I don't need be taken from me. I must take the Steps I need in today and leave the rest up to my God. He knows what is best for me. He knows what's in store for me. All I know is that I would like to make it to the library and the noon AA meeting if possible. In order to do that, I need to catch some more Zzzzzzs.

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Just for today, I will allow my self hope. I found hope through the 12 Promises of AA. As the scriptures say, "My Hope is in the Lord." Not sure where it is said, I am just grateful I remember the words. Where there is life, there is hope. I had lost all hope, but I found that my God had plans for me. Part of those plans, was being here.

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Just for today, I will practice my acceptance. I have been having problems with my memory and seem to be forgetting a lot of things. I hope and pray that today is a much better day than yesterday. It wasn't so much bad, as it wasn't good. Before I leave my apartment and wait for the elevator, I say the Serenity Prayer. Accepting where I am at in the moment and having patience with myself.

Today I have this little elephant to help me to never forget. ;)

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Just for today, I am praying and asking for patience and tolerance. I am hurting from the neck down and have a head ache. LOL! My son says it is suppose to rain. I just said to a couple of members from my group on Thursday, "I hate it when my body tells me it is going to rain three days before it gets here. It stops you from completely enjoying the sunny days. For me, any day the sun is shining is a good day. It is sometimes hard defining a day a such when you hurt from top to toe. I keep saying, the sun is shining, the sun is shining. It is sometimes hard to put some gratitude in my attitude when that happens. I just have to tolerate it, I know it will pass. I also know I haven't had enough sleep, so need to close up shop and do what I need to do for myself, just for today.

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Just for today, I will practice patience and tolerance. I did a really good job. I didn't go over and hit the guy that was mouthing off at our dinner. I told myself, you can't hit very hard so it wouldn't do any good. He was brash, crass, loud and obnoxious. Young girls were helping their grandmother serve and he said things that I didn't think were appropriate, but I am old fashioned in a lot of ways. I found him to be verbally abusive and some people can ignore it, but having lived it, I don't want to be around it and I don't think young people need to hear such things and think it is normal and the way the man they will meet, can talk that way and it is cool and acceptable. NOT!!!

I am afraid, if looks could kill he would have rolled over and died. So that is not good on my part, and certainly not tolerant. I almost left, but chose to stay.

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Just for today, I will try to do the do things that need doing. I won't run away from home and stay to do my laundry, and clean my kitchen. I also have a lot of reading to do to catch up before some books are overdue. Even so, I won't allow myself to hide in my books, I will be disciplined enough to get the work done that I need to do.

I will remember that Osho says that you can meditate while doing dishes.

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Just for today, I will stay positive. I will look at what I have, rather than what I don't have. Through my God, all things are possible, according to His Diviine Will.

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Just for today, I will remember that I have a program. I will apply it to all areas of my life. My life is not longer about drinking and drugging, it is about thinking and my emotional sobriety.

Today I was reminded to make healthy choices. As a result, I am sitting here eating the odd bite here and there of strawberries and pineapple. Mmmmm Good. I was planning on KFC because it is Toonie Tuesday, but didn't have the patience to stand in line. My impatience cost me double the price, plus more for the fruit I bought. The only spiritual thing about it really, was the fact that I shared it with my son. I was thinking of keeping it to myself. I have a program, it is spiritual in nature. I need to apply the spiritual principles to my life.

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Just for today, I will let go of resentments. I fell in love my city because it was green and had lots of trees. Yesterday they cut a small grove of trees across the street from me. They wanted to extend the parking area by the looks of things. Either that, or partiers from Hess Village were using them for illegal reasons. Don't know, I shall miss them. They were not shade for me, perhaps they were being used for shady people, but they spoiled my view. I will get over the "Oh, woe is me." In a couple of days, I will probably forget that they were there.

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Just for today, I will practice patience and tolerance. So far today, I haven't done too well. I had a few words with a taxi driver and told him to quit playing games and just drive the car. He took us into downtown traffic instead of skirting it. The difference I said it in what I thought was a decisive and not an aggressive manner. He may have other ideas. As a friend use to tell me, "You have such a nice way of telling someone off and they don't even know they have been told." :(

This is a program of practice, practice, practice.

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Just for today, I will try to be organized. Not just in my actions, but my thoughts too. I will turn my day over to my Higher Power and go with the flow and try to stay out of His Way.

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Just for today, I will ask for peace and serenity. Things aren't too good with my son right now and all I can do is put him in his God's Hands. I am trying to keep my nose out of his business and leave him with his choices.

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Just for today, I will pray for the knowing and clarity I need in today. I will turn my day over to my Higher Power instead of going on self-will. I hope he has plans for my son to do the dishes, but I don't think so. He is going out to do some yard work for friends. ;) That is okay, because it gives me back my apartment as I don't like watching the TV shows he watches, so I can do my work in peace and quiet, put on music, or watch my own shows. Thy Will, not mine be done. Yet saying that, I need to practice self-care. Sometimes it is okay to just be, I don't always have to be doing. I try to work through my pain, but some day I am not able to do that. Today is a good day the sun is shining, even though it is cold. Again, when it comes to housework, I have to pray for the willingness to be willing.

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Just for today, I pray for what I need for my health and well being. Not sure if I am sick and if I am, not sure what is the matter. Woke with a head ache and sore throat, both have eased but not feeling up to par. I get impatient with myself when I am feeling off. My son told me to go to bed. Bed is for sleeping and I don't want to spoil my sleep tonight, yet when night time comes, I will probably not be able to sleep. I don't want to go to bed just for the sake of going to bed. :(

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