Sponsorship, the otherway

[Larrylive]

I have attended meetings for many years, I only have a few years "in" recovery. I have been opening/making making coffee for four cycles of a Big Book study and...

...In my humble opinion, the object is not to get a sponsor,but to be a sponsor. Don't pick a sponsor, but strive to help another alcoholic/addict. I live for the day, when instead of the newcomer getting numbers, old-timers ask for the new-comers.

"I am responsible,
when any one, anywhere
reaches out for help,
I want the hand of AA to be there.
And for that I am responsible."

Carry the message, don't sit on it waiting.

Be Well,
Larry

[MajestyJo]

Thanks for sharing. In the beginning, I needed that sponsor. Someone to bounce my ideas off and get them affirmed. My spiritual adviser said, "Remember you alone with you is bad company." I couldn't give away what I didn't have. I had to experience sponsorship in order to sponsor someone else.

Even when I was a sponsor, I went to my sponsor and her sponsor.

I am glad it works for you. I was told that I didn't qualify for service until I was 2 years sober, and the only sponsorship I qualified for was going to a meeting, sitting in a chair and sharing my experience, strength, and hope. What worked for me, might not work for others. I was told and I found out, that just because someone was in the rooms of recovery, didn't mean they had a message that would work for me. My sponsor said I would learn two things at a meeting. How to work my program and how NOT to work my program.

[Larrylive]

Funny thing is in the Big Book the talk of working with another alcoholic during the first few days of sobriety, although they really don't speak of sponsorship, atleast not the way it's used today. And as far as service work, that should start immiediatly also, nothing like commitment to keep one ground. here in Upstate NY the chairperson doesn't share on the topics, just reads from a predetermine format. If a person can't handle that they should seek a higher level of care.
To much of today's program is designed to make the newcomer feel less than and the old-timers feel superior. I think Bill & Dr. Bob wished to get people back on their feet as qiuck as possible.

IMHO,
Larry

[MajestyJo]

Thanks for sharing. I was told that the newcomer was the most important person in the room. I also found that many people focus on the new people, and forget that this is a one day at a time program, and an elder can hurt too.

My sponsor told me, if you woke up before 7 a.m. this morning, you have more sobriety than I have. I had about 3 years of sobriety and he had 20.

The only difference I have found, is the fact that I have had more practice trying to work the program. I am aware of more tools and have a bit more experience, but I have found, that when I am caught up in the situation in the moment, I can lose sight and not see until I can finally see and go "Dah!" don't you think it is time to Let Go and Let God, pray, and meditate and listen for the answers.

Many times I have needed my sponsor to make me aware, to share how the program worked for her, and redirect me to a possible solution. My best thinking got me to the doors of recovery, I need to remember that.

As my sponsor said to me in early recovery, take your thoughts and do a 180 deg. turn and do the opposite of what you always thought and did.