Today's Thought - October

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October 1

I have never seen a greater monster or miracle than myself.

~Montaigne

We know we’ve hurt people. We’ve heard our family cry out from the pain we’ve caused them. Because of alcohol and other drugs, we acted like monsters.

But we now live surrounded with love. We now work hard to make this world better. Recovery is a miracle. The rebirth of our spirit is our miracle.

It’s no wonder we love life the way we do! We’ve been given a second chance. Our joy is overflowing. The way we have been transformed through the will of our Higher Power and our work in the program is truly a marvel.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me manage the monster that lives within me. I pray that it will never again be let out.
Action for the Day

Today I’ll see myself as a miracle. I’ll be grateful for my new life.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple, Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal

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October 2

One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture, and, if it were possible, to speak a few reasonable words.

~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

A spiritual man can nourish his growing spirit through enriching and beautiful experiences. Such experiences might be quiet meditation, listening to music, talking with a friend, or reading something that provides ideas to ponder. As men, we’ve been taught to focus on things more than on people. And, as we pursued goals and achievements, we neglected to provide ourselves with nourishment for our minds and souls.

Life’s experiences include joy and beauty and pain and grief. If we are uplifted every day by beauty in its many forms, we are strengthened and carried along to meet the tougher parts of our day. But to find those moments of beauty, we may need to push some other things aside. Perhaps some jobs can wait until tomorrow, and we can linger over a meal with our loved ones. Maybe mowing the lawn or fixing the car tonight isn’t as important as a half hour of good music. Do we make space for nourishing moments in each day?

I am grateful for the beauty all around. Help me keep life more balanced so I can receive the spiritual nourishment it provides.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones, A Book of Daily Meditations for Men

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October 3

Being positive

For us to grow and develop spiritually, we need to examine our thoughts and beliefs. Do we look for the good in people, places, and events? Do we shed a positive light on all we come into contact with? To understand and accept is not to limit or control. Acknowledging the truth generates positive energy, positive thoughts, and a positive lifestyle.

Negative thinking produces negative habits. It undermines our morals so that we develop a “what’s the difference” attitude. But a positive faith in a Higher Power, as each of us understands it, gives strength to the body and courage to the soul.

Do I have positive beliefs?

Higher Power, may positive thoughts and beliefs be the guiding forces of my life.

I will cultivate positive beliefs today by…

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day, Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts

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October 4

Reflection for the Day

Soon after I came to the program, I found a Higher Power. I’ve come to believe that my Higher Power has all power; if I stay close to my Power and do its work well, my Higher Power provides me not with what I think I want, but with what I need. Gradually, I’m becoming less interested in myself and my little schemes; at the same time, I’m becoming more interested in seeing what I can contribute to others and to life. As I become more conscious of my Higher Power’s presence, am I beginning to lose my self-centered fears?
Today I Pray

May I see that the single most evident change in myself—beyond my own inner sense of peace—is that I have come out from behind my phony castle walls, dropped the drawbridge that leads into my real village, and crossed it. I am back among people again, interested in them, caring what happens to them. May I find my joy here in this peopled reality, now that I have left behind those old self-protective fears and illusions of my own uniqueness.
Today I Will Remember

What is life without people?

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time, Daily Reflections for Recovering People

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October 5

Program meetings are like vitamins: Our need for them is ongoing.

A question newcomers frequently ask is “How long do I have to go to these meetings?” “Until you want to,” the old-timers reply. At first we don’t understand. But our lives begin to change because we are behaving in new ways, ways we’ve learned through the program.

We’ve probably heard that insanity means doing the same harmful thing repeatedly but always expecting a different outcome. That’s how we lived for years, no doubt. Now we have a new plan to live by and a new set of expectations. It’s wonderful and so comforting to realize that our lives today and in the future can be far more rewarding and serene as the result of taking our “daily vitamin.” Our growth and happiness will be ongoing if we make a commitment to the program.

My Twelve Step program gives me hope that today will be handled with ease. I will know what to do.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own, Meditations on Hope and Acceptance

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October 6

The trickster characters found in different world cultures are most often loved and seen as attractive, despite their comical flaws. Trickster energy, so often engaged in stepping beyond social norms, asks us to examine the question of what being attractive really means. At the same time, much of the trickster’s power is rooted in an ever-changing image.

Internet stories abound of people putting up one face on social media or dating websites while their “in-person” reality looks quite different. Why is there this need to pretend to be someone other than who we are? Usually it is based on some aspect of ourselves that we deem unacceptable, whether this is physical appearance or a specific character quality that does not quite measure up to some mysterious standard.

Much of the language of the Twelve Steps is about defects of character, and even though we stand firm in recovery, we may still view ourselves as somehow broken and unworthy. The first step in generating the energy of being attractive to others is to accept ourselves as we are, right now, this moment. Not some new and improved version we think we need to be, but the authentic being we see staring back at us in the mirror. We are all works in progress, learning to love who we are each step of our recovery journey.

I am whole right now, and ever changing, evolving into my amazing greatness!

Today's reading is from the book Cornerstones, Daily Meditations for the Journey into Manhood and Recovery

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October 7

Apologies

Sometimes, we act in a manner with which we are less than comfortable. That’s human. That’s why we have the words: “I’m sorry.” They heal and bridge the gap. But we don’t have to say “I’m sorry” if we didn’t do anything wrong. A sense of shame can keep us apologizing for everything we do, every word we say, for being alive and being who we are.

We don’t have to apologize for taking care of ourselves, dealing with feelings, setting boundaries, having fun, or getting healthy.

We never have to change our course, if it is in our best interest, but sometimes a general apology acknowledges other feelings and can be useful when the issues of a circumstance or relationship are not clear. We might say: “I’m sorry for the fuss we had. I’m sorry if what I needed to do to take care of myself hurt you; it was not intended that way.”

Once we make an apology, we don’t have to keep repeating it. If someone wants to keep on extricating an apology from us for the same incident, that is the person’s issue, and we don’t have to get hooked.

We can learn to take our apologies seriously and not hand them out when they’re not valid. When we feel good about ourselves, we know when it’s time to say we’re sorry and when it’s not.

Today, I will try to be clear and healthy in my apologies, taking responsibility for my actions and nobody else’s. God, help me figure out what I need to apologize for and what is not my responsibility.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go, Daily Meditations on Codependency

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October 8

You can’t be a good egg all your life—you either have to hatch or go bad.

~Fr. Ralph Pfau

We must all take our turn at being followers until we’re ready to lead. So, until that time, we follow by listening to others, doing as they do, leaning on their wisdom and experience.

Then the time comes for us to assume leadership. This is the point when we have heard most of what the others have to say and received most of what the group has to give. By applying those principles and practices in our daily lives, we have become ready to take on a different role.

There will always be people who are just becoming aware of themselves as adult children. They will come to meetings hesitantly and be looking to us for comfort, direction, challenge, and wisdom. They give us our chance to share the gifts we’ve received. The quality of the leadership we have to offer is entirely dependent on our willingness and ability to take responsibility when the time comes.

Today, I will assess my progress in the program. I will not lose any opportunity to share what I have learned.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy, Daily Meditations for Adult Children

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October 9

Every man has to learn the points of the compass again as often as he awakes, whether from sleep or any abstraction.

~Henry David Thoreau

The secret, for us, is to never let our recovery wander away from us. We keep a good compass by working the Steps. Working the Steps tells us what we need to be doing and where we need to go in our recovery. Our sponsor helps us with this and helps us stay on course.

We also need the energy behind us to keep us from getting stalled out. We keep this energy—this “tailwind”—by making our program a way of life. The more we put ourselves in its path, the more the recovery wind keeps us moving. We stay in the path of this wind by going to meetings at least once a week and by using recovery tools as a matter of habit every day.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me remember that my spirituality has a lot to do with the way I use my life energy.
Today's Action

Are there days when I’d like to skip my reading, my prayer, my meetings, my conscious contact with my Higher Power? I will talk with my sponsor about a plan to get through this kind of day next time it comes up.

Today's reading is from the book God Grant Me, More Daily Meditations from the Authors of Keep It Simple

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October 10

Do not make yourself so big—you are not so small.

~Jewish saying

Many of us are so used to being competitive that, even when there is nothing at stake, we exaggerate our qualities and boast of our accomplishments. We sometimes display what we may call a “grandiose ego”—pretentious and false. This is particularly true of addicts because we often feel the need to hide behind an inflated image of ourselves. Why? Because we’re afraid of being found out. We think we can prevent people from knowing all about us.

As we move into recovery, we find that we gain insight and confidence about ourselves. We are no longer shame-based people, so we don’t need to hide behind a mask. Our sexuality is now ours to delight in and not a source of fear and shame. We gain a sense of proportion in our lives and a viable perspective on who we are.

We are now neither angels nor beasts, and we can be proud to be human.

I am glad to be at a place where I can be fully human, whether I’m alone or with others.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart, Daily Meditations for Men and Women Recovering from Sex Addiction

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October 11

Serenity

Serenity = Reality = Inner peace and strength

~Anonymous

Most of us chased an elusive thing called serenity for years. We thought our journeys outside reality brought us peace and serenity. When we returned to reality we found harshness and pain that caused us to run back to using. So it went, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year. Run, escape, pain; run, escape, pain.

Then something happened. Our addiction wouldn’t let us escape any more. We no longer found what we were seeking. We tried using more heavily. Finally, all that was left of our lives was the pain.

The fellowship shows us that reality is not a problem. Trying to escape reality is a problem. When we continue to turn our wills and lives over to a Higher Power, the serenity that results creates a reality of inner peace and strength.

I trust and believe that the changes I am going through in my recovery are necessary and good for me.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It, A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations

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October 12

Planning is only the ego’s decision to be anxious now.

~Hugh Prather

Making plans and assumptions about the future means that we don’t entirely trust God to guide us. It also means we think we know now exactly what the future should be. Or, we might be afraid of what will happen in the future, so we plan, thinking we can somehow control it.

What happens when we waste time worrying about the future? We overlook what’s going on right now. Looking ahead, we keep ourselves from getting the most out of this moment, and the next moment, and the next. When making plans to visit a new place, we have to make reservations and buy the tickets, but we can’t plan every moment of our agenda, and we can’t worry about what may happen to us while we’re there.

I will trust God for what I need when its time comes.

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October 13

The strength of the drive determines the force required to suppress it.

~Mary Jane Sherfey

We are all struggling to succeed. And each day of our lives we'll be confronted with major or minor adversities that might well interfere with our success. Adversities don 't have to hinder us, however. They can strengthen us, if we incorporate them as opportunities for growth.

For many of us, the ability to handle adversity is a fairly recent phenomenon. And not always can we do it securely and with ease. But we are coming to believe that a power greater than ourselves is at hand and will guarantee us all the strength we'll ever need. Knowing that action is always possible, that passive acceptance of any condition need never be necessary, are unconditional gifts of living the Twelve Step program.

Our path forward is as certain as our commitment to it, our belief in the strength of the program, and our faith that all is well even when times are troubled. No one ever promised that our new way of life would be always easy. But we have been promised that we'll arrive at our proper destination if we do the footwork and let God do the navigating.

Success is at hand. I will apply what I'm learning, and I’ll meet it.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning, Daily meditations for Women

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October 14

It’s not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.

~Addison Walker

Being considerate, civil, generous, and interested in others forms the basis of good character and good relationships with others. When we stop being so focused on ourselves, when we stop trying to come out ahead of everyone else, our world opens up. We suddenly have good, supportive friendships that are more valuable than material winnings.

The Golden Rule is ancient advice that is expressed in many languages and world religions. It says, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” It is a small man who takes away someone else’s power to advance his own. A strong man can confidently cheer for the strength of others.

Today, I am grateful for the good friends in my life.

Today's reading is from the book Stepping Stones, More Daily Meditations for Men

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October 15

AA Thought for the Day

One of the mottoes of AA is “First things first.” This means that we should always keep in mind that alcohol is our number-one problem. We must never let any other problem—whether of family, business, friends, or anything else—take precedence in our minds over our alcoholic problem. As we go along in AA, we learn to recognize the things that may upset us emotionally. When we find ourselves getting upset over something, we must realize that it’s a luxury we alcoholics can’t afford. Anything that makes us forget our number-one problem is dangerous to us. Am I keeping sobriety in first place in my mind?
Meditation for the Day

Spiritual progress is the law of your being. Try to see around you more and more of beauty and truth, knowledge and power. Today try to be stronger, braver, more loving as a result of what you did yesterday. This law of spiritual progress gives meaning and purpose to your life. Always expect better things ahead. You can accomplish much good through the strength of God’s spirit in you. Never be too discouraged. The world is sure to get better, in spite of setbacks of war, hate, and greed. Be part of the cure of the world’s ills rather than part of the disease.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may keep progressing in the better life. I pray that I may be a part of the forces for good in the world.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day, A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life