Today's Thought - July

[bluidkiti]

July 1

Within our dreams and aspirations, we find our opportunities.

~Sue Atchley Ebaugh

Many great creative people—including Albert Einstein—have made important discoveries while daydreaming. We also can tap into the energy that comes from random associations and the unconscious. Through this, a new vision becomes possible.

Perhaps when we were at school we were told to be alert and not to dream our lives away. Parents, too, may have discouraged our imaginative lives. Our culture tends to reward the rational and the pragmatic, and to consider the dreamer of marginal importance.

But let’s not lose our power to dream. Our dreams can be much more than fantasies born of our addiction. Our deepest wishes and hopes will often come to the surface when we are drowsing or simply letting the mind roam through life’s possibilities. Many times we stumble on the truth in our dreams. We need the energy and the vision that come with dreaming.

I welcome the gift of ideas that come to me while I let my imagination roam.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart, Daily Meditations for Men and Women Recovering from Sex Addiction

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July 2

The Ready Pupil

God gave us two ears but only one mouth. Some say that’s because our Higher Power wanted us to spend twice as much time listening as we did talking.

~Anonymous

One of the most valuable things we can do is to become a good listener. When we concentrate on absorbing what wiser and more experienced members say, rather than thinking about what we imagine others want to hear from us, we will grow in our program. We are aware that “when the pupil is ready, the teacher will appear.”

Often, the teacher is an unlikely source. Some of the things we most need to hear may come from someone new to the program. If we are highly educated, it may come from someone with no education at all. If we are materially successful, it may come from someone who has nothing. We are all teachers and all students in the program. We constantly learn from each other, wherever or whoever we are.

I shall never stop learning as I will always be a pupil in my program. Thankfully, I will never graduate. There are no diplomas, only revelations. I will be a good listener.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It, A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations

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July 3

Why, then the world’s mine oyster, which I with sword will open.

~William Shakespeare

We had little doubt, as youngsters, that the world was our oyster, and we were going to make of it what we chose. But somewhere along the line, that oyster got tougher to open. It was our world, all right, but we failed somehow to become a part of it. Many of us felt (still feel at times) that we were on the outside looking in, estranged from our world and its inhabitants.

This feeling changes as we use the tools of our program. We find that being able to help one another with our feelings of estrangement is a gift of our Higher Power. Understanding each other’s fears, we can offer comfort. We use the swords of love and friendship to pry the halves of the shell apart—and then the world is indeed our oyster. For we’ve found, thanks to the fulfillment of the promises of our program, that we have unlimited potential. We are all God’s children, all loved, all included.

I want no one to feel like a stranger in my world.

Today's reading is from the book In God's Care, Daily Meditations on Spirituality in Recovery

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July 4

Love is not getting, but giving. It is sacrifice. And sacrifice is glorious!

~Joanna Field

How easily we mistake attention for love. Even more easily, we trick ourselves into thinking our ability to control someone signifies love—especially theirs for us. But love is something far different from either attention or control. Far different.

Love frees others from our grasp—and lets them return on their own. Love is placing an other's personal needs above our own, without regret. Love is selfless, yet it exhilarates the self. Giving love softens our edges, completes us, and connects us to the people with whom we are fulfilling our destinies.

Wanting love is a normal human desire, not one we should deny. And we shall receive love, the less our emphasis is on getting it, the more on giving it. We invite love when we freely and honestly give it. Another invitation for love comes from loving ourselves; self-hatred, which trapped many of us for years, hampers us no longer. Love inspires ourselves and those we give it to. It brightens our way, lessens our burdens, makes possible our rightful unfolding.

I won't look for love today. I will just give it. It will bless me tenfold.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning, Daily meditations for Women

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July 5

All our loves are first loves.

~Susan Fromberg Schaeffer

When we fall in love with someone, it is a unique thing that comes from deep within us. Any relationship is the creation of two people who open themselves to each other and share themselves beyond the usual boundaries. That is the excitement of true love. Two people give each other the keys to their private world, just as we might share the key to our home, trusting that it will be used with care and respect. This intimacy isn’t usually instantaneous. It builds on experience together.

In an intimate relationship, we have the responsibility to be good stewards of the trust given to us. Looking at our partner’s role is always so much easier than looking at our own, but we need to resist that easy temptation. Our first questions should always be: Do I make it safe for my partner to be open with me? Do I witness my partner’s vulnerability as a trust that I do not abuse? Am I gentle and respectful with the key my partner gave me?

Today, I will be a good partner, honoring and guarding the trust I have been given.

Today's reading is from the book Stepping Stones, More Daily Meditations for Men

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July 6

AA Thought for the Day

Can I get well? If I mean, “Can I ever drink normally again?” the answer is no. But if I mean, “Can I stay sober?” the answer is definitely yes. I can get well by turning my drinking problem over to a Power greater than myself, that Divine Principle in the universe which we call God, and by asking that Power each morning to give me the strength to stay sober for the next twenty-four hours. I know from the experience of thousands of people that if I honestly want to get well, I can get well. Am I faithfully following the AA program?
Meditation for the Day

Persevere in all that God’s guidance moves you to do. The persistent carrying out of what seems right and good will bring you to that place where you would be. If you look back over God’s guidance, you will see that His leading has been very gradual and that only as you have carried out His wishes, as far as you can understand them, has God been able to give you more clear and definite leading. You are led by God’s touch on a quickened, responsive mind.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may persevere in doing what seems right. I pray that I may carry out all of God’s leading, as far as I can understand it.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day, A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life

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July 7

Where is the yesterday that worried us so?

~Joan Walsh Anglund

In the fairy tale The Last Dream of the Old Oak Tree, the oak tree felt sorry for the day-fly. The day-fly only lives for one day, and the tree was already 365 years old. But the day-fly was so enjoying his one day that the tree’s sympathy puzzled him. The day-fly said to the tree, "You may have thousands of my days, but l have thousands of moments to be pleased and happy in."

And so the day-fly continued to dance in the sun and smell the clover and honeysuckle. His day ended as happily as he spent it, and he settled down on a blade of grass.

If all of us could approach our day the way the day-fly does, as though this were our only day, we would spend less time worrying about yesterday and tomorrow.

How can I show my gratitude for the gift of this day?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift, Daily Meditations for Families

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July 8

Speak when you’re angry and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret.

~Laurence J. Peter

When we used alcohol or other drugs, most of us were hotheads. We thought we were right. If we were proven wrong, we may have made life hell for everyone. People knew enough to stay away from us.

In recovery, things will still go badly at times. We’ll get hurt. And we’ll get angry. But now, our anger no longer controls us. We also turn over our anger to our Higher Power. In our groups, we talk about what makes us angry. Then we leave the anger behind when the meeting is over. We find that being at peace is now more important than getting even.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, when I’m angry, help me slow down. Help me remember it’s okay to be angry, but it’s not okay to abuse people.
Action for the Day

I will remember a time when I turned anger into rage and hurt someone. I will also remember a time I was angry in a respectful way.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple, Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal

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July 9

I don’t like a man to be too efficient. He’s likely to be not human enough.

~Felix Frankfurter

On our path we seek balance. Pursuing any single value and ignoring another, whether it is efficiency, hard work, or leisure, will make one-sided men of us. Psychology tells us our right brain is the creative, intuitive side and our left brain is the concrete, fact-gathering side. Spending our energies developing only one part of ourselves will leave us incomplete. We males have been taught we should be decisive, practical, and have our feet on the ground.

As men, we are also creative and sensitive. We think in stories, pictures, and metaphors, and we love music. At our best, we are willing to place people and relationships ahead of things and goals. When we are wisest and most human, we draw on the many sides of ourselves.

Today, I will use both the creative, intuitive part of me and the practical, decisive part that can get a job done.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones, A Book of Daily Meditations for Men

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July 10

Being foolish

Many of us could say that what we have gained from this program we’ve gained in spite of ourselves. We get in our own way and often block ourselves from our Higher Power and fellow addicts. In the beginning, we did foolish things such as going to places where drugs or alcohol are used, deliberately setting ourselves up to take that first drink or drug.

Even when we make such mistakes, our Higher Power still accepts us. We can still choose to pray and ask for help—even in our foolish moments, in spite of ourselves.

Am I becoming less foolish these days?

Higher Power, help me become more aware of my own foolish thoughts, and help me avoid acting on them.

Today I will try to stay out of my own way by…

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day, Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts

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July 11

Reflection for the Day

I know today that “stopping in for a drink” will never again be—for me—simply killing a few minutes and leaving a few bucks on a bar. In exchange for the first drink, what I’d plunk down now would be my bank account, my family, our home, our car, my job, my sanity, and probably my life. It’s too big a price and too great a risk. Do you remember your last drunk?
Today I Pray

May I be strong in the knowledge that my Higher Power is with me at all times. May I learn to feel that spiritual presence. May I know that nothing is hidden from my Higher Power. Unlike the world, which approves or disapproves of my outward behavior, my Higher Power sees all that I do, think, or feel. If I seek to do that Power’s will, I can always count on reward for me—peace of mind.
Today I Will Remember

A Higher Power knows all.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time, Daily Reflections for Recovering People

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July 12

Living on the edge has lost its appeal.

Keeping life simple and quiet may at first seem boring. Many of us were used to living in extremes: situations were either going our way and we were ecstatic, or all hell had broken loose and we were enraged, perhaps even suicidal. It was our perspective, often a faulty one, that defined the way situations appeared. Creating chaos had become normal.

Our new life in recovery may at first seem strange. But in time deciding we want to live serenely and slowing down so we can think through circumstances before responding will begin to feel normal. How fortunate that we have a blueprint for doing this. The Twelve Steps and the slogans will make possible whatever change we want to make.

I didn’t know what serenity was before coming to a Twelve Step program. But it’s mine today and every day if I want it.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own, Meditations on Hope and Acceptance

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July 13

We learn as we go, and the path is formed by walking on it. Establishing regular reinforcing positive practices is important consciousness work. If we were to make a list of all the self-nurturing actions we engage in on a daily or weekly basis, what might we find? While many of us regularly practice some forms of self-discipline, we may not be doing this consciously or seeking to expand and refine our focus.

In all areas of life—whether eating, exercising, doing something creative, being in our living space, or engaging in our work life—we have to invest in order to be our best. Each new day can be a reminder to love ourselves in this way. It takes time, energy, and a deep commitment to improve. Lofty goals can provide inspiration, but it is through the perspiration of daily discipline that we manifest them. It is the bridge, the gateway, the portal, the channel through which we gradually live into the life we deeply desire. We can begin with small steps in any important arena, and then adjust and redefine as we go. Paying regular attention to the various habits included in our self-discipline toolbox is one of the most important aspects of loving ourselves and supporting our personal evolution.

My daily choices are made easier when I stick to routines and behaviors that serve me well.

Today's reading is from the book Cornerstones, Daily Meditations for the Journey into Manhood and Recovery

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July 14

You Are Lovable.

We go back… and back…and back…through the layers of fear, shame, rage, hurt, and negative incantations until we discover the exuberant, unencumbered, delightful, and lovable child that was, and still is, in us.

~Beyond Codependency

You are lovable. Yes, you. Just because people haven’t been there for you, just because certain people haven’t been able to show love for you in ways that worked, just because relationships have failed or gone sour does not mean that you’re unlovable.

You’ve had lessons to learn. Sometimes, those lessons have hurt. Let go of the pain. Open your heart to love. You are lovable. You are loved.

Today I will tell myself I’m lovable. I will do this until I believe it.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go, Daily Meditations on Codependency

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July 15

I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live up to what light I have.

~Abraham Lincoln

There are as many definitions of success as there are people. Some want fame, some money—some fame and money. Some define success as professional attainment, some as personal popularity. These varying definitions identify all the gaps in our society—generation gaps, cultural gaps, educational gaps, credibility gaps. Each group has its own ideas about success.

Maybe the lack of a common understanding of success is the reason so many of us are alienated. Maybe we should all agree that real success is spiritual, not tangible. It is a matter of being ever more alive, not ever more effective about getting what we want. Greater life is a gift we can only give to ourselves and to one another. To be a giver is to be successful.

As I work my program today, I will focus my sights on inner rather than outer success. It doesn’t matter if the world counts me a success; the important thing is that I do.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy, Daily Meditations for Adult Children