Today's Thought - February

[bluidkiti]

February 14

Go to the truth beyond the mind. Love is the bridge.

~Stephen Levine

Our best thinking often got us in trouble. We convinced ourselves that doing the absolutely wrong thing was right. We thought we knew what was real and true. We fought to defend our truths. We became self-righteous, arrogant, and full of ego. These attitudes kept us from the truth. Why? Because what was missing was love. We replaced love of people and love of spiritual principles with love of alcohol and drugs, and love of self. We rejected divine love and chose self-centeredness instead.

Recovery asks us to risk telling the truth again. We start our meetings by stating the truth of why we are there: "Hi, my name is...and I’m an addict." We do inventories to discover truths about ourselves. The love we show each other and the love of our Higher Power help nurse us back to health. Love is the bridge that makes us willing to face the truth. We use the Steps to cross this bridge and find the truths that will set us free.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, you are both truth and love. Help me to see you in the challenges of my day.

[bluidkiti]

February 15

Spreading the Message of Love

I had trust issues and didn't want to go into a room full of people that I didn't know. It took me a long time to be able to join a group and be honest and open. I wasn't ready to speak of my emotions or feelings. In the beginning, not speaking was the easy part.

Today I am a member of a group with a lot of newcomers. I see myself in all of them. Some share. Some don't. Some of them sit there with no light in their eyes. What do I do? I approach them, welcome them, introduce myself, and say "I love you." That's something I would never have done before. Never.

Imagine how different the world would be if a world full of people did that too.

Today I will welcome a newcomer as I was welcomed in the community of recovery - with uninhibited love.

~John F., U.S. Air Force, 1985–1996

Today's reading is from the book Leave No One Behind: Daily meditations for Military Service Members and Veterans in Recovery*

[bluidkiti]

February 16

Reflection for the Day

Recovery teaches us that we are bodily and mentally different from our fellows. We are reminded that the great obsession of every abnormal drinker or dependent user - and every one of us who is otherwise addictive - is to prove that somehow, someday, we will be able to control our drinking, using, eating, or gambling. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing, we are told, and many pursue it to the gates of insanity or death. Have I conceded to my innermost self that, for me, "One is too many and a thousand not enough"?

Today I Pray

May I have no illusions about someday becoming a moderate drinker or drug user after being an obsessive one. May I muffle any small voice of destructive pride that lies to me, telling me that I can now go back to my former use and control it. This is a program of no return, and I thank my Higher Power for it.
Today I Will Remember

My goal must be lifelong abstinence - a day at a time.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time: Daily Reflections for Recovering People*

[bluidkiti]

February 17

No one's behavior reflects on me but mine!

Being embarrassed by a friend or lover's drunkenness was not uncommon. Most of us experienced that. What was also common was assuming others judged us every time the alcoholic drank.

It's difficult to give up that belief even with the input we now receive from program members. Slowly, we are beginning to understand that it is our shame that has triggered our assumptions.

Whenever we behave as respectful, well-meaning people, others can judge us only as such. If, by contrast, we choose to behave as self-centered, rude individuals, that is exactly how we will be viewed. How the alcoholic in our lives acts is not a true barometer of how others see us.

I will focus on me today and how I project myself. If I want the love and praises of others, I’ll need to earn it by my actions.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance*

[bluidkiti]

February 18

An improviser may have to practice for years before being able to play a totally spontaneous minute of music in which every detail is right for its own fleeting moment.

~Stephen Nachmanovich

We have achieved mastery and success in some areas of our lives but are still beginners in others. We may have forgotten the time and persistence our accomplishments required and are expecting instant comprehension and command of something new to us.

It is never too late for us to acquire new learning, as long as we have the humility and courage to be beginners again. This means being tolerant of our own awkwardness and ignorance, being patient as we go through what seems like failure and not giving up easily on ourselves or on the learning process.

It means persevering, taking small steps over and over, paying attention to details, and leaving outcomes to our Higher Power. Whether we want to learn a language, maintain healthy sobriety, or have satisfying relationships with our peers, the same combination of openness, consistent action, and surrender will bring good results.

Today, it's safe for me to be a beginner.

Today's reading is from the book Glad Day

[bluidkiti]

February 19

Anger is one of the many profound effects life has on us. It's one of our emotions. And we're going to feel it when it comes our way - or else repress it.

~Codependent No More

If I was working a good program, I wouldn't get angry…If I was a good Christian, I wouldn't feel angry…If I was really using my affirmations about how happy I am, I wouldn't be angry…Those are old messages that seduce us into not feeling again. Anger is part of life. We need not dwell in it or seek it out, but we can't afford to ignore it.

In recovery, we learn we can shamelessly feel all our feelings, including anger, and still take responsibility for what we do when we feel angry. We don't have to let anger control us, but it surely will if we prevent ourselves from feeling it.

Being grateful, being positive, being healthy, does not mean we never feel angry. Being grateful, positive, and healthy means we feel angry when we need to.

Today, I will let myself be angry, if I need to. I can feel and release my emotions, including anger, constructively. I will be grateful for my anger and the things it is trying to show me. I can feel and accept all my emotions without shame, and I can take responsibility for my actions.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency*

[bluidkiti]

February 20

The price of wisdom is above rubies.

~From Job 28:18

Our program is founded on wisdom, and the wisdom of the program is the light of our lives. It shines into the dark corners of the spirit where the myths lurk that would degrade rather than create, entrap rather than set free. Wisdom lets us see what and whose game is being played. Is it my game or yours? Not to know the difference is to dangle like a puppet from a set of strings hooked to head and limbs.

It may be a game of guilt, of taking responsibility for someone else's life, of accepting peace at any price - or any number of enslaving games. Without the wisdom of the program, how could we know? Without wisdom, how could we learn to give ourselves credit for how far we have come rather than berate ourselves for how slow we are moving? What a relief and a comfort to be able to rely on our wise Steps and Traditions for fail-safe guidance.

Today, I am grateful for the program’s teachings.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy: Daily Meditations for Adult Children*