NACR Daily Meditation - November

[bluidkiti]

November 16

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give
you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and
humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is
easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:28-30

God desires to give us rest. But we resist this gift. No matter how badly we may want to rest, it is not an easy gift to receive. We may be weary. We may be burdened. But we are good at minimizing and avoiding our needs. As soon as we get this next task done, then we will rest. As soon as there's time for it, then we will rest. We want to rest, but we have to work real hard to make time for resting and then when we're back at work we will need to work real hard to make up for the 'lost' time.

While we resist the gift of rest, many of us welcome burdens. We find it easier to believe that burdens are the gift God really wants to give us. We will welcome a difficult mission from God, a task, a challenge. We welcome the opportunity to wear ourselves out in ministry.

But the heavy burdens, the weariness are not God's plan for us. God's burden is light. God's plan for us is not exhaustion but soul rest. God wants us to be so rested that it sinks down to the foundations of our person. God wants us to be rested down to our souls. In rest we find that many of the burdens of life do not belong to us. We find the freedom to give back to God those things over which we have no control.

Give me the courage to come and receive from you, Lord.
Burdens weigh heavy on my soul.
Give me the courage to come and receive from you, Lord.
My restless soul longs for you.
Give me the courage to come and receive from you, Lord.
Replace these burdens with your rest.
Share with me your easy yoke
so that I can find rest for my soul.
Amen

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 17

There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone
who enters God's rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from
his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest . . .let us
then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive
mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
Hebrews 4:9-11,16

God rested from his work.

And God invites us to rest from ours. In our time of need God invites us to experience the rest-full-ness that comes from receiving mercy and grace.

But we resist. Rest is such a reversal of our expectations. We don't expect mercy and grace. We expect criticism. We don't expect to be invited to approach with confidence; we expect rejection. We don't expect rest, we expect to receive a list of demanding tasks to perform. Becoming the kind of people who are capable of rest will require us to change. It will require effort on our part.

First, we will need to change the way we see ourselves. We are attached to the illusion that we have no limits. We may not claim to be immortal, but if you examine our behavior, we act as if we need less rest than God. God rested. We don't. Clearly something is wrong. If we are to become the kind of people who are capable of rest, it will take some effort to change the way we see ourselves.

Second, to increase our capacity for rest, we will need to change our behavior. Rest is not an idea. It is a behavior. It will take some effort to change the way we live. We will need to learn the skills that make it possible for us to say no to over commitment. We will need to build rest into the rhythm of our lives.

God rested. We need to do the same.

Help me to acknowledge my need for rest, Lord.
Help me to make quiet spaces in my life
when I cease all my doing
and allow myself to be.
Help me to make the effort to rest today.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 18

The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.
Mark 2:27

The Sabbath is a day of rest. It is a day to stop working, to reflect, to remember, to celebrate. It is a day for quietness and a day for worship. God's concerns about the Sabbath do not come from a desire to control us. Jesus made it clear that Sabbath-keeping was not meant to be one more compulsion, one more "should", one more obligation. God does not ask us to rest because he wants to create one more burden for us.

Rest for people is like oil changes for internal combustion engines. A lot of careful engineering goes into the manufacturer's recommendations about oil changes. Maybe we can put it off for a while, but we can't put it off forever. The engine will stop working. Irreversible damage will be done. The manufacturer does not recommend oil changes because it has a vested interest in selling lots of oil. The manufacturer knows what the engine needs and wants it to run for us without breaking down.

God wants our experience with life to be a positive one. And God knows what we need for this to happen. God knows we can put off rest for a while, but we can not put it off forever. We will stop functioning. We will do irreversible damage.

Many of us have a history of taking days of rest and making them the most rest-less days of the week. We have an amazing ability to fill a day of rest with non-stop activity. But expressing our compulsivity in leisure activities is not the same thing as rest. It will take some creativity and discipline for us to find ways to keep the Sabbath that work for us. But that's what God wants. God wants Sabbath to be 'for' us. The Sabbath is God's gracious provision for us.

Help me not to become compulsive about rest, Lord.
I am compulsive about so many other things.
Spare me from adding this to my long list of things to do.
You offer me rest, Lord,
because you love me.
Let me, out of a growing love for you and for myself
allow myself to rest today.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 19

In repentance and rest is your salvation,
in quietness and trust is your strength
Isaiah 30:15

Our work is an important part of our identity. We have a legitimate need to contribute and to feel competent. Too often, however, this legitimate need is distorted by a compulsion to work. We work and work and work because we want to prove ourselves, because we want to feel capable and strong. When our identity and value are primarily wrapped up in our productivity it provides us with an appearance of strength. But this strength does not go deep - it is only a matter of appearances. The more we achieve or produce, the more anxious we become. We wonder when it will all come crashing down. We wonder when we will be 'found out'.

This text suggests that strength comes from other sources. Probably the most surprising suggestions are that strength comes from quietness and salvation comes from rest. Why would rest and quietness be so important?

Salvation is not possible when we are in charge because we are not the Messiah. We cannot save the world. We cannot even save ourselves. When we rest, we are forced to abandon our messianic illusions. When we rest we accept our place as creatures in need of being saved by someone with power greater than our own. When we do this, repentance comes and salvation is possible.

Quietness has a similar effect. We cannot hear what God has to say when our lives are full of noise. The frenzy of life can drown out God's voice. But when we rest, we can again hear God's voice. And it is God's words of love that can make us strong.

Lord, I am not very strong.
All my striving, and doing and proving
haven't made me strong.
I long for the deep strengththat comes from quietness
and from trust.
I rest my weary soul in you today, Lord.
Give me the courage to be quiet.
Give me the faith to trust in you.
Strengthen me today
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 20

All who keep the Sabbath without desecrating it
and who hold fast to my covenant -
these I will bring to my holy mountain
and give them joy in my house of prayer.
Isaiah 56:6b-7a

Rest can lead to joy because it creates a new perspective in us. Rest reminds us that we don't have to be compulsively responsible for the world and everything in it. Rest reminds us that God is in charge. Rest also leads to joy because it leads to a renewed relationship with God. As this text puts it, God promises to lead Sabbath-keepers to his holy mountain. In rest we can be led to a place of joy in God's house of prayer. It is a beautiful image of God rejoicing with people who rest.

Rest can also lead to joy because it restores us. It renews and re-energizes us because it allows us to balance our "being" with our "doing". When we cease doing for a time, our senses are opened again to the world around us. We can see life with new gratitude and awe. And gratitude and awe produce joy.

Rest frees us to be what we are - creatures. We are creatures who can work and play, give and receive, weep and laugh. Today we can balance our working, giving and weeping with playing, receiving and laughing.

Lord, I want to stop doing for a time today.
I want to stop and remember that you are God.
Help me to experience the freedom and joy of being your creature.
Help to keep the Sabbath.
Bring me to your holy mountain.
Give me joy in your house of prayer.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 21

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord,
"plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future."
Jeremiah 29:11

Hope is about the future. It may be oriented to the next hour, or the next day, or the next month or year or decade. But hope is always about anticipation.

Those of us who like to control things often find hope difficult because we do not control the future. Many of us are compulsive makers-of-plans. We are willing to work ourselves to death trying to make our plans become reality. But when our hopes and vision for the future are based only on what we can control, our vision is inevitably narrowed and impoverished.

We need to remind ourselves regularly, therefore, that God's vision for the future is better than our own. God sees possibilities and opportunities that we cannot see. The horizons of God's imagination are not bounded. When we root our hope in God, a totally different future is possible. It is not a future we can control. God's plans may not be the same as our plans. But we can return again and again to God as our source of hope.

God has been clear about our future. It is God's intention to give us a hope and a future. This is not a promise of a trouble-free life. It is not a promise of immunity from struggle. But it is a promise of hope. God has been with us in the past. God is with us in the present. And God will be with us in the future.

Thank you for paying attention to my future, Lord.
Thank you for making plans.
Help me today to rest in the thought that
your plans for me include blessing.
Open my heart today to the hope and the future
you have prepared for me.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 22

Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them.
Does he not leave the ninety-nine in the open country
and go after the lost sheep until he finds it?
And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home.
Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says,
'Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.'
Luke 15:4-5


It is easy for us to lose our way. We may start off with confidence. We think we know where we are and where we are headed. And, then, somewhere along the way in life we get lost. We find ourselves alone and we don't know where we are. We get confused and disoriented. We don't know how to find our way back, how to get 'on track' again.

Fortunately, God pays attention. God notices that we are lost. And, because of the great value God sees in us, God sets out to find us. God searches for us. God pursues us until we are found.

When God finds us, most of us expect God to say: 'Where have you been? I have been looking all over for you! Can't you follow directions? What's wrong with you? I don't want to have to come back out here again to find you. Try to pay attention from now on!'

But there is no hint of scolding, shaming, yelling or blaming in this text. When God finds us, God is full of joy. God picks us up and carries us home. God celebrates.

God pays attention. God notices when we are lost. God searches for us. And God celebrates when we are found. Recovery is the gift of being found by God.

I was lost, Lord.
Alone..
Disoriented. Confused. Afraid.
You found me.
I expected blame and rejection when you found me.
I expected you to be full of rage.
I expected you to see me as an inconvenience.
But you greeted me with joy.
With celebration!
Thank you for finding me.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 23

I pray that you, being rooted and established in love
may have power . . .to grasp . . . the love of Christ.
Ephesians 3:17


We all have root systems. Roots are life-lines. They seek out and drink in water and nutrients. And they provide stability in times of wind and erosion.

Unfortunately, many of us are rooted in the soil of shame. Roots in this rocky soil become bound. They cannot sustain growth. They are not able to provide nourishment or stability.

Recovery for many of us is like being transplanted. It is the process of allowing God to first pull us out of the parched and rocky soil of shame and to then plant us in the soil of love. In the rich soil of love our fragile roots can finally begin to stretch, grow and take hold. It is a soil in which real nourishment and real stability are possible.

But transplantation is not a simple matter. No matter how gently God pulls us up out of the soil of shame, there will be trauma. And sinking roots in new soil will feel like an unfamiliar and risky adventure.

As our roots sink deeper and deeper in the soil of God's love, however, we will begin to experience growth that never could have been possible in the soil of rejection and shame. We will become 'rooted and established' in love.

My roots are in poor soil, Lord.
They do not nourish.
They provide no stability.
My roots are bound, Lord.
Transplant me.
Give me grace-full soil, Lord.
Sink my roots deeply.
Give me stability.
Nourish me.
In your love.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 24

I have stilled and quieted my soul;
like a weaned child with its mother,
like a weaned child is my soul within me.
Psalm 131:1-2


A weaned child in the psalmist's culture is a child who can walk and talk. It is a child who for many months has been nourished day and night at it's mother's breast. Every time the pain of hunger came, the child enjoyed the powerful combination of having its stomach filled with warm milk while being held in a close, intimate embrace. Messages of love and valuing flowed into the child's spirit while the life-sustaining milk flowed into its body.

Love and nourishment are the soil in which security grows. A weaned child still needs to eat. But, it is not frantic about its next meal. It has learned that it's needs are important, that they will be noticed and that they can be met. Because of the love and nourishment it has received, a weaned child has grown secure.

Recovery is like being loved and nourished until we can be weaned. We don't grow out of having needs - our goal is not mere self reliance. Rather our goal is to experience love and nourishment. As we do so, we gradually become less frantic about our next meal. We grow. We heal. Eventually a new kind of security grows in us - not the security of toxic self-reliance, but the security that comes from nurture. We become less frantic, less fragile. Our souls become stilled and quieted.

Nourish me, Lord.
Nourish me with your love.
Calm the frantic feelings within me.
Grow a sense of security within me.
I want to be able to sit quietly.
Like a weaned child.
Nourished.
Secure in your love.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 25

Then we will no longer be infants,
tossed back and forth by the waves,
and blown here and there by every wind of teaching
and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming.
Instead, speaking the truth in love,
we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head,
that is, Christ. From him the whole body,
joined and held together by every supporting ligament,
grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.
Ephesians 4:14-16

"Why can't you grow up?!" Parents sometimes express their anger and impatience with their children in this way. But, it is not a shameful thing to be a child. To acknowledge our child-like-ness is to acknowledge our limits and our dependency. It is to make room for wonder, trust and joy in our lives. If that is what it means to be a child, then we need more of it.

But there is also a sense, as in this text, in which to be child-like is to be immature or unstable. It is a good thing to grow-up. Not because it is shameful to be a child, but because growth is part of God's plan for us. Being "tossed back and forth" is an exhausting way to live. We need to find some way to live without being "blown here and there".

Growing up is hard work. The reason for this, as this text suggests, is that growing up is closely connected with learning to speak the truth. Honesty is a central dynamic of growth and recovery. Increasing our capacity for honesty is not an easy process. But, as we speak the truth in love, we will experience some dramatic changes in our relationships. We will find a more intimate relationship with God - we will 'grow up into Christ'. And we will also find ourselves 'joined and held together' in a community of faith.

Help me to be a child, Lord,
Help me to face my dependencies and my limits.
But, help me to grow up as well.
I'm tired of being tossed back and forth.
I want more stability than being blown here and there.
I want to have stable, healthy relationships
with you, and with others.
So, build within me a capacity for honesty.
Help me to speak the truth in love
so that I can grow up.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 26

Not that I have already obtained all this,
or have already been made perfect,
but I press on to take hold of that
for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.
Philippians 3:12


Some days the desire to be 'finished' with recovery is almost overwhelming. It is such an attractive thought. To be 'done'. It sounds so good. Done. Finally. Please, Lord, I want to be done today.

But, we have learned something about our capacity for self-deceit. We have learned that we are not entirely in control of the process of recovery. And, we have learned something about the dangers of complacency. It can lead us back into denial, and toward relapse. There is no more dangerous moment for us than the moment we become convinced that we are all better.

Recovery is 'pressing on'. We have not 'already obtained.' We have not 'already been made perfect.' Tomorrow's recovery cannot be done in advance. And yesterday's recovery, although it has changed and enriched us, is not the same thing as today's recovery. Today's recovery can only be done today.

The process of recovery restructures our lives in some very fundamental ways. We had learned silence, and in recovery we learn to speak the truth. We had learned not to feel, and in recovery we learn to feel. We had learned either not to need other people at all or to be excessively dependent on other people, and in recovery we learn to need other people in appropriate ways. These are significant changes. But, they are not irreversible changes. We can go back to silence, emotional numbness and unhealthy relationships. Recovery is necessarily therefore a new way of life. It is a daily pressing on. It is the day-at-a-time practice of the disciplines of recovery that makes it possible for us to continue to heal, grow and change.


Lord, you have brought me so far.
Thank you. I am grateful for all I have gained.
But, I want to press on.
I want to continue to grow.
I want to continue to learn.
Help me to press on.
Help me to do today's recovery today.
Help me to press on toward you.
Take hold of me with your love.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 27

Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.
He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom
and broke away their chains.
Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love
and his wonderful deeds for men,
for he breaks down gates of bronze and
cuts through bars of iron.
Psalm 107:13-16


Addictions and compulsions are a kind of bondage. Painful memories are also like chains that bind us. We try harder and harder to change. But sometimes the harder we try, the tighter the chains become. Recovery begins when we recognize that our bondage is too great for us. We are not powerful enough to break these chains. Either we will find a power greater than ourselves to help us, or we will stay in bondage.

Many people find the idea of powerlessness to be very troubling. We want to be competent and self-reliant. And, many of us have had people attempt to 'rescue' us in ways that have increased our shame and self-contempt. So, why should we welcome the God-who-rescues? Won't he also shame us?

First, notice in this text that God's intervention is in response to a request. We do not serve a codependent God. God is not entangled in our compulsions. God will not rescue in ways that are shame-full. God knows that we need to be ready to be helped and that we need to cry out for help.

Notice also in this text that it is the God-of-unfailing-love who is our higher power. Because so many of us are convinced that God is vindictive, punitive and abusive, it can be terrifying in our powerlessness to focus on the power of God. We are sure that all of that power will be used against us. But the God-of-unfailing-love is not a vindictive, punitive or abusive God. God is a God-of-tough-love. That's the only kind of love that can be 'unfailing.' But God is not 'against' us. God is 'for' us.

Recovery is being set free by God's powerful love.


I was powerless, Lord.
I expected you to increase my shame and self-contempt.
But you are a God of unfailing love.
I expected you to use your power against me.
But when I called, you came.
You crashed the gates.
You cut the bars.
You broke the chains.
You are leading me out of this darkness and deepest gloom
into the light of day.
Thank you.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 28

The people walking in darkness have seen a great light;
on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned.
Isaiah 9:2


We know what it is like to walk in darkness. We know what it is like to live in the shadow of death. But we also are beginning to experience what it is like to see. The darkness of denial is giving way to the light of honesty in our lives.

Of course, when you have lived in darkness as long as we have, the light can be painfully bright. We see the truth about ourselves and our self destructive behavior. We see the truth about our refusal of love. We see the truth of our brokenness. We see old pain. We see current behaviors that damage ourselves and others. The light dawns. It is not a pretty sight.

But God does not send light into our darkness to shame us. The exposure may trigger our deep shame, but this is not God's purpose. God's light is like the light of dawn. It is a light that signals that something new is happening. A new beginning is possible. The light that God brings into our dark world is a light of hope.

Recovery is God's light coming into our darkness. The light exposes. We begin to see clearly the ways we have sinned and the ways other people have sinned against us. And the light provides hope. In the light we see the possibility for new beginnings.


Lord, your light hurts my eyes.
It is too bright.
I see too clearly now.
It is too painful for me.
Help me to believe that your light is not to bring shame
but to bring hope into my dark world.
Light of Heaven, embrace me with your warmth.
Heal me with your bright rays.
Give me life.
And hope.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 29

Here I am! I stand at the door and knock.
If anyone hears my voice and opens the door,
I will come in and eat with him and he with me.
Rev. 3:20

Some people enter without knocking. It happens. Our boundaries have not always been respected. As a result, we have built some significant defenses. Our doors have multiple locks. When needed, they can be latched, barred, bolted, double bolted and sealed securely.

As we begin the healing process, however, we begin to experiment with allowing our defenses to come down. We unlatch one lock at a time.

Nothing is more helpful in this process than having people who respect our boundaries - people who will knock and wait patiently for an answer. So, this picture of Jesus is full of good news for us. Jesus stands at the door and knocks. It is pure invitation. God does not invade. God does not demand. God does not manipulate. God gently, persistently knocks. God says 'here I am, I would like to spend time with you'.

Recovery is a process of learning to trust God. Trust grows slowly. We can't do that all at once. But perhaps today we can listen carefully for a knock. Tomorrow we may be able to manage a "who is there?". And, with persistence, we will some day sit at table with God and enjoy God's loving presence.

Lord, thank you for knocking.
Thank you for respecting my boundaries.
And, thank you for knocking persistently.
It takes me a while to respond
because my doors have so many latches.
Give me courage this day
to open the doors of my life to you.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan

[bluidkiti]

November 30

Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters;
and you who have no money, come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost.
Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.
Isaiah 55:1


Most of us have spent a lot of money and a lot of effort on things that do not satisfy. When our efforts do not result in serenity, we become more and more confused and more and more frantic. Into the middle of this chaos and desperation comes an invitation. God invites us to receive 'food' which is designed to delight our souls.

God's invitation is to people who are thirsty or hungry. It is to people who are working hard but finding little satisfaction. The invitation extends to those who have no money or assets of any kind. God is not sparing or stingy. God is an extravagant giver of good things. God wants us to delight in the richest of fare.

The nourishment at God's feast does more than please our taste-buds. This meal is more than mere esthetic pleasure. The nourishment from God's table feeds our souls with delight. It is nourishment that sinks down to the deepest places of our being. God seeds delight in the foundations of our soul. And from these seeds come serenity, peace and the courage to continue.


God, I'm thirsty.
I have spent my money and energy
on things that have not satisfied.
God, my soul is hungry.
I need food for my soul.

Help me to come to you, Lord.
You know my hesitation.
You know how suspicious I am
of such an extravagant invitation.
Help me to come as an eager child
to receive good things from you.
Feed my soul, Lord,
until it is full of delight.
Amen.

Dale and Juanita Ryan