Daily Recovery Readings - February

[bluidkiti]

February 1

Daily Reflections

GOAL: SANITY

"...Step Two gently and very gradually began to
infiltrate my life. I can't say upon what occasion or
on what day I came to believe in a power greater than
myself, but I certainly have that belief now."
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 27

"Came to believe!" I gave lip service to my belief when
I felt like it or when I thought it would look good. I
didn't really trust God. I didn't believe He cared for
me. I kept trying to change things I couldn't change.
Gradually, in disgust, I began to turn it all over,
saying: "You're so omnipotent, you take care of it." He
did. I began to receive answers to my deepest problems,
sometimes at the most unusual times: driving to work,
eating lunch, or when I was sound asleep. I realized
that I hadn't thought of those solutions--a Power greater
than myself had given them to me. I came to believe.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

When we think about having a drink, we're thinking of
the kick we get out of drinking, the pleasure, the escape
from boredom, the feeling of self-importance and the
companionship of other drinkers. What we don't think of
is the letdown, the hangover, the remorse, the waste of
money, and the facing of another day. In other words,
when we think about that first drink, we're thinking of
all the assets of drinking and none of the liabilities.
What has drinking really got that we haven't got
in A.A.? Do I believe that the liabilities of drinking outweigh
the assets?

Meditation For The Day

I will start a new life each day. I will put the old
mistakes away and start anew each day. God always offers
me a fresh start. I will not be burdened or anxious. If
God's forgiveness were only for the righteous and those
who had not sinned, where would be its need? I believe
that God forgives us all our sins, if we are honestly
trying to live today the way He wants us to live. God
forgives us much and we should be very grateful.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that my life may not be spoiled by worry and fear
and selfishness. I pray that I may have a glad, thankful
and humble heart.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Moral Responsibility, p. 32

"Some strongly object to the A.A. position that alcoholism is an
illness. This concept, they feel, removes moral responsibility from
alcoholics. As any A.A. knows, this is far from true. We do not use
the concept of sickness to absolve our members from responsibility.
On the contrary, we use the fact of fatal illness to clamp the heaviest
kind of moral obligation onto the sufferer, the obligation to use A.A.'s
Twelve Steps to get well.

"In the early days of his drinking, the alcoholic is often guilty of
irresponsibility. But once the time of compulsive drinking has arrived,
he can't very well be held fully accountable for his conduct. He then
has an obsession that condemns him to drink. and a bodily sensitivity to
alcohol that guarantees his final madness and death.

"But when he is made aware of this condition, he is under pressure to
accept A.A.'s program of moral regeneration."

Talk, 1960

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Garbage in, Garbage Out
Releasing the Past
One thing we don't need in our lives is garbage from the past. Yet many of us say that old thoughts and bitter memories often sneak devilishly back to spoil what should have been a pleasant day. Why do we let garbage from the past befoul our lives a second time?
Computer programmers use a certain expression when their systems turn up errors: "GARBAGE IN, GARBAGE OUT." If you feed erroneous, useless information into a computer, that's what you get back.
We seem to have built-in computers that work the same way. If we waste time and energy talking about past injustices or old mistakes, we are unwittingly calling them back into our lives. We are bringing back garbage that should have been discarded permanently to make room for better things.
There is no benefit in bringing back old garbage. We can't change the past. We can't change our mistakes by brooding about them, and we can't obtain justice by remembering how badly we were treated or by plotting revenge. When we bring back garbage, we allow it to occupy space that should be devoted to constructive and positive things.
If we don't want garbage in our lives, let's not put it there by bringing up matters that should have been released, forgiven, and forgotten.
I will keep my mind on the present, knowing that a positive attitude will help me make the best of the opportunities that come to me.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.---Step Two
The Second Step directs us to believe there is hope for us. It may take time to believe this. Many of us had given up hope. But look around. Hope fills our meeting rooms. We are surrounded by miracles. This Power greater than ourselves has healed many. Listen as others tell their stories. They speak of how powerful this Power is. At times, we will not believe. This is normal But in recovery ,"coming to believe" means opening ourselves up to healing power found in the program.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, allow me to believe Help me to stay open to recovery.
Action for the Day: I will list three examples of my past insanity. I will share these examples with my group, sponsor, a program friend, or with my Higher Power. I will remember that I'm a miracle.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

You were there when I needed you. You stood above all of the others with your strength and you guided me. To each of you I offer my being, my love and all that I am. --Deidra Sarault
Each of us is guided while we act as guides to one another, throughout the day, throughout our lives. We are interdependent. Everywhere we look, someone is learning from us and we from her. We often know not what we give, when we give it. And we seldom realize the value of what we're receiving at the time we accept it.
Resistance to what another person is offering us may be our natural response. But the passage of time highlights the value of the experience. We can look for the comforters in our lives. They are there offering us strength and hope enough to see us through any difficulty.
We need both the rough times and the soft shoulders of a friend. They contribute equally to the designs our lives are weaving. The rough times press us to pray, to reach out to others for solace. And our pain gives others the chance to heal our wounds. We are all healers offering strength. And we all need healing.
One of the greatest gifts of my recovery is giving and receiving strength.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

In our personal stories you will find a wide variation in the way each teller approaches and conceives of the Power which is greater than himself. Whether we agree with a particular approach or conception seems to make little difference. Experience has taught us that these are matters about which, for our purpose, we need not be worried. They are questions for each individual to settle for himself.

p. 50

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

I went to elementary and high school in Washington, D.C., and then to Howard University. My internship was in Washington. I never had too much trouble in school. I was wable to get my work out. All my troubles arose when I was thrown socially among groups of people. As far as school was concerned, I made fair good grades throughout.

p. 235

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

Still more wonderful is the feeling that we do not have to be specially distinguished among our fellows in order to be useful and profoundly happy. Not many of us can be leaders of prominence, nor do we wish to be. Service, gladly rendered, obligations squarely met, troubles well accepted or solved with God's help, the knowledge that at home or in the world outside we are partners in a common effort, the well-understood fact that in God's sight all human beings are important, the proof that love freely given surely brings a full return, the certainty that we are no longer isolated and alone in self-constructed prisons, the surety that we need no longer be square pegs in round holes but can fit and belong in God's scheme of things--these are the permanent and legitimate satisfactions of right living for which no amount of pomp and circumstance, no heap of material possessions, could possibly be substitutes. True ambition is not what we thought it was. True ambition is the deep desire to live usefully and walk humbly under the grace of God.

pp. 124-125

************************************************** *********

"He who cannot rest, cannot work; He who cannot let go, cannot hold on; He who cannot find footing, cannot go forward." --Harry Emerson Fosdick

If you find you've reached a dead end, it might be because you're sitting on it.

"You will never find time for anything. If you want time you must make it." --Charles Buxton

I asked my sponsor, "What do you do when you finish working the Steps?" Without batting an eye, he replied, "You lie really still, because you're dead!" --unknown

"Maintaining sobriety is like feeding a parking meter. It's all about change." --unknown

"Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one." --Hans Selye

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

RELIGION

"We have just enough religion
to make us hate, but not enough
to make us love one another."
-- Jonathan Swift

Religion is a powerful influence in the world, but so often the "power"
is negative. It has been used to judge, divide, separate and control
people; rob them of their freedom and creativity; chain them to creeds
and teachings that are not comprehensible. Unfortunately, religion has
become dull and lifeless for many people and God's love is missed.

But the power of creative spirituality is alive in God's world. It unites
and frees the people so that they can be discovered in their
individuality. Difference is accepted, choice is respected and healing is
perceived in our ability to love.

Let me ever bring the gift of God's spirituality to those who have
misplaced it.

************************************************** *********

"Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in the time of need." Hebrews 4:16

Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven. Luke 6:36-37

Prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. James 1:22

Cast all your anxieties on God because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

We have every reason to be at peace because God will either protect us from suffering or give us immense strength to see us through it. Lord, I set aside my anxieties because You care for me every day in every way.

If you exercise your mind, your spirit will never get old. Lord, give me the ability to rise above my worldly burdens and ability to always make things a little better.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Hardships

" We felt different... Only after surrender are we able to overcome the alienation of addiction."
Basic Text p. 22

" But you don't understand!" we spluttered, trying to cover up. "I'm different! I've really got it rough!" We used these lines over and over in our active addiction, either trying to escape the consequences of our actions or avoid following the rules that applied to everyone else. We may have cried them at our first meeting. Perhaps we've even caught ourselves whining them recently.

So many of us feel different or unique. As addicts, we can use almost anything to alienate ourselves. But there's no excuse for missing out on recovery, nothing that can make us ineligible for the program—not a life-threatening illness, not poverty, not anything. There are thousands of addicts who have found recovery despite the real hardships they've faced. Through working the program, their spiritual awareness has grown, in spite of—or perhaps in response to—those hardships.

Our individual circumstances and differences are irrelevant when it comes to recovery. By letting go of our uniqueness and surrendering to this simple way of life, we're bound to find that we feel a part of something. And feeling a part of something gives us the strength to walk through life, hardships and all.

Just for today: I will let go of my uniqueness and embrace the principles of recovery I have in common with so many others. My hardships do not exclude me from recovery; rather, they draw me into it.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
It's not enough to talk to plants, you also have to listen. --David Bergman
Plants grow best when we pay attention to them. That means watering, touching them, putting them in places where they will receive good light. They need people around them to notice if they are drooping at the edges or looking particularly happy in the sunlight. The more attention a plant receives, the better it will grow.
We need to be noticed in the same way. If we notice a family member or friend is drooping, perhaps we can pay some special attention to him or her. All of us need someone to care about how we are and to truly listen to us. We can share and double someone's happiness by noticing and talking about it also. We help the people around us to grow by listening to their droopy edges as well as their bright days. People need this as much as plants need light and water.
How can I help someone grow today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Who of us is mature enough for offspring before the offspring themselves arrive? The value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults. --Peter De Vries
Many of us, in entering recovery, are confronted with guilt about our roles as fathers. We can see so clearly with hindsight that we could have been better parents. Others of us recall the unfairness of our own parents and find it hard to forgive them.
This mixture of guilt and resentment is part of the package of recovery. If we remained the same and never learned anything new, we wouldn't have to feel guilty about the past or face our need to let go of resentments. Our spiritual renewal requires that we forgive ourselves and accept the forgiveness of those around us. Even today our children are not helped by our guilt, but they will be helped - at any age - by our amended lives. And all generations are enriched when we are able to repair broken connections with our parents.
I can accept the increased consciousness that recovery brings without punishing myself for what I didn't know.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Step Two
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. --Step Two of Al-Anon
We come to believe in a better life through the powerful gift of other people - hearing them, seeing them, and watching the gift of recovery at work in their lives.
There is a Power greater than us. There is real hope now that things can and will be different and better for our life and us.
We are not in a "do it ourselves" program. We do not have to exert willpower to change. We do not have to force our recovery to happen. We do not have to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps just so we believe that there is a Power greater than ourselves - one who will get the job done in our life. This Power will do for us what your greatest and most diligent efforts could not accomplish.
Our Higher Power will restore us to a sane and beneficial life. All we do is believe.
Look. Watch. See the people around you. See the healing they have found. Then discover your own faith, your own belief, your own healing.
Today, regardless of my circumstances, I will believe to the best of my ability that a Power greater than myself can and will restore me to a peaceful, sane way of living. Then I will relax and let Him do that.


I know that one step at a time I am making progress today. I am grateful for all my growth, even though it is not always very obvious. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Transcend Your Limitations

You’re free now, free to take the journey of a lifetime. Free to experience life, in its newness, its freshness, its magic– in a way you never have before.

The only limitations on you are the ones you’ve placed on yourself. Your prison has been of your own making. Don’t blame or chastise yourself. Life has created certain challenges for you. The purpose has been to set you free, to provide you with lessons, experiences, circumstances that would trigger growth and healing. Life has been provoking, promoting, urging you to grow, stretch, learn, heal. Life has been trying to break you out of your prison.

Set yourself free. Let yourself go on a journey of love. Take notes. Be present. Experience. Learn. Love and laugh, and cry when you need to. Rest when you’re tired. Take a flashlight to help you see in the dark. But most of all, take yourself and go.

Go on your journey of joy.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Say woohoo

I put on my skydiving gear and headed for the airplane. Here I was again, ready to go. My hands were already sweating; I could feel the quiver in my lip. Why did I keep doing this to myself?

Once I boarded the airplane, I started what had become a routine for me. I don’t have to do this, I told myself.I’m volunteering to skydive. It’s not mandatory. Not wanting to overly embarrass myself in front of the other, more experienced sky divers, I coped with my anxiety by fidgeting. I fidgeted with the altimeter on my hand. I fidgeted with the strap on my helmet.

I wanted to tell my jump master I couldn’t jump because I was having a heart attack, but I knew he wouldn’t believe me. It was just anxiety, fear building up to an unmanageable, uncontrollable level.

A friend was sitting across from me, watching. “How are you doing Mel?” he asked.

“Scared,” I said.

“Do you say woohoo?” he asked.

“What do you mean?” I said.

“When you get to the door and jump, say woohoo,” he said. “You can’t have a bad time if you do.”

I walked to the door of the plane, hoisted myself out, and waited for the nod from my jump master, signaling that he was ready for the count.

“Ready,” I said. “Set.” Then with all my might I yelled, “WOOHOO,” so loud the sky divers in the back of the plane heard me.

My jump master followed me out of the plane and then positioned himself in front of me. I looked at him and grinned. Then I grinned some more. So this is why I’m doing this, I thought. Because it’s so much fun.

It was the best jump I’d had yet.

We’re jumping into the unknown, when we have a baby or a new job.

Sometimes, however, we don’t choose our experience. I can recall sitting on the edge of the bed in the hospital room after Shane’s death, knowing that the journey I was about to embark upon would not be an exhilarating one. God, I don’t want to go through this, I thought. It’s not going to be over in three months or a year. This one I’ll live with the rest of my life. I can remember standing in the parking lot outside the courthouse after my divorce from the children’s father. I took one deep breath, feeling exhilarated and free. The next one was filled with terror and dread. My God, I was now a dirt-poor single parent with two children to raise.

Sometimes we jump out that door voluntarily. Sometimes we’re pushed.

Feel your fear, then let it go. Dread is just a prejudice against the future. After having examined all the probabilaties and possibilities, we decide ahead of time that we’re going to have the worse experience possible. So let go of dread,too.

Fidget if you must. Ask yourself what you’re doing here. Then walk to the door and give the count. See how much fun it can be when you jump into the unknown and feel the rush of being fully alive.

God, help me take a deep breath and holler woohoo.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

The longer I’m in The Program, the more clearly I see why it’s important for me to understand why I do what I do, and say what I say. In the process, I’m coming to realize what kind of person I really am. I see now, for example, that it’s far easier to be honest with other people that with myself. I’m learning, also, that we’re all hampered by our need to justify our actions and words. Have I taken an inventory of myself as suggested in the Twelve Steps? Have I admitted my faults to myself, to god, and to another human being?

Today I Pray

May I not be stalled in my recovery process by the enormity of The Program’s fourth Step, taking a moral inventory of myself, or by admitting these shortcomings to myself, to God and to another human being. May I know that honesty to myself about myself is all-important.

Today I Will Remember

I cannot mend if I bend the truth.

****************************************

One More Day

Snow endures but for a season, and joy comes with the morning.
– Marcus Aurelius

We are a nation which sometimes sells out for short-term goals and short-term gratification. We may overuse credit cards. At times we live on impulse and buy on impulse. Gone is the long-term planning our parents tired to teach us as children. Gone is learning to wait.

Now we have no choice. Life’s circumstances, especially illness, force us to wait whether or not we want to. True, we live with pain and annoyance, but once again, quite accidentally, we begin to know the joy that comes from the waiting and from savoring any small victory.

Patience is a virtue I am once again cultivating. Life’s circumstances have taught me the importance of finding the joy in each day.

This books author is Sefra Kobrin Pitzele

************************************

Food For Thought

Learning

In this program, we never stop learning. It takes time to absorb the OA way of life. Some of us start with great enthusiasm, expecting perfection all at once. When we do not achieve it, we are sometimes tempted to give up and go back to the old, self-destructive way of eating the wrong kinds of food in the wrong amounts.

One of the most important things we learn in OA is patience with ourselves. We seek progress, not perfection. We work for it one step at a time, one day at a time. Our Higher Power accepts us and loves us as we are right now, today. By turning our lives over to Him and humbly asking for guidance, we become receptive to His teaching.

As we grow - slowly -we learn from our mistakes even more than from our successes. We are willing to be again as little children, and we are willing to accept suggestions and help from those who have had more experience and time in the program. We do not have to continue to make the same mistakes over and over again. We can learn the new way of life if we will walk into it patiently and slowly.

Open my body, mind, and heart to Your teaching, Lord.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ Strategy ~

"Better shun the bait than struggle in the snare. "
John Dryden

Perhaps the most important strategy for beating temptation is to avoid it altogether. Temptation pits me head-on with my disease and all of its cunning and baffling ways. It's so much easier to stay out of its claws and devices than to try to free myself once caught in its web.

What ways do I bring temptation right into my house or provide access to temptation when I go out? Do I keep forbidden foods in my house? Have I ever asked other family members to go without those things because they are dangerous to me or my recovery? Do I go places or engage in activities that increase my desire to eat compulsively? Have I considered that, for now, I just can't go certain places because of the risk to my recovery? Have I considered that I might have to give up socializing with certain groups of people because they lead me into temptation? Does watching TV trigger compulsive eating? Does putting myself in the company of a certain individuals lead to self- defeating behavior of any kind? Do I continually expose myself to stressful situations or people that tempt me to eat compulsively? Do I continue doing the things that tempt me to eat to ease the feelings or emotions that come up over it?

Perhaps I am in an unwholesome relationship, or I overspend, or have another addiction or compulsion. What am I willing to do to recover? What am I willing to change to keep myself out of harm's way?

It is easy to pray for God to keep me from temptation, but I must do my part also.

One day at a time ...
I must remember to avoid the people, places and things that tempt me to eat compulsively and provide a way for the disease to touch me again.
~ Diane ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Did not these feelings, after all, determine the course of our existence? It was impossible to say we had no capacity for faith, or love, or worship. In one form or another we had been living by faith and little else. - Pg. 54 - We Agnostics

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

"That great cloud rains down on all, whether their nature is superior or inferior. The light of the sun and the moon illuminates the whole world, both him who does well and him who does ill, both him who stands high and him who stands low." Buddha from Sadharmapundarika Sutra 5 "Your father in heaven makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the righteous and on the unrighteous." Jesus from Matthew 5.45

I seek comfort and wisdom from all Universal Sources as I journey toward recovery.

I thank you God

For most this amazing day, for the leafy, greenly spirits of trees, and everything which is infinite, which is beautiful, which is yes. I who have died am alive again today and this is the sun's birthday.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Nothing happens by accident. There are no coincidences, they say, only God-incidences.

I believe that God can do for me what I can't do for myself. I believe in God-incidences.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Sponsorship-the art of helping an alcoholic grow up without putting them down.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I know that one step at a time I am making progress today. I am grateful for all my growth,, even though it is not always very obvious.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I didn't become an alcoholic because I drank too much. I drank too much because I'm an alcoholic. - Unknown origin.

[bluidkiti]

February 2

Daily Reflections

RESCUED BY SURRENDERING

Characteristic of the so-called typical alcoholic is a narcissistic
egocentric core, dominated by feelings of omnipotence, intent
on maintaining at all costs its inner integrity.... Inwardly the alcoholic
brooks no control from man or God. He, the alcoholic, is and must be
the master of his destiny. He will fight to the end to preserve that
position.
A.A. COMES OF AGE, p.311

The great mystery is: "Why do some of us die alcoholic deaths,
fighting to preserve the 'independence' of our ego, while others seem
to sober up effortlessly in A.A.?" Help from a Higher Power, the gift of
sobriety, came to me when an otherwise unexplained desire to stop
drinking coincided with my willingness to accept the suggestions of
the men and women of A.A. I had to surrender, for only by reaching
out to God and my fellows could I be rescued.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

We got a kick out of the first few drinks, before we got stupefied by
alcohol. For a while, the world seemed to look brighter. But how
about the letdown, the terrible depression that comes the morning
after? In A.A., we get a real kick, not a false feeling of exhilaration,
but a real feeling of satisfaction with ourselves and self-respect. And
a feeling of friendliness toward the world. We got a sort of pleasure
from drinking. For a while we thought we were happy. But it's only an
illusion. The hangover the next day is the opposite of pleasure. In
A.A., am I getting real pleasure and serenity and peace?

Meditation For The Day

I will practice love, because lack of love will block the way. I will try
to see good in all people, those I like and also those who fret me and
go against the grain. They are all children of God. I will try to give
love, otherwise how can I dwell in God's spirit, whence nothing
unloving can come? I will try to get along with all people, because the
more love I give away, the more I will have.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may do all I can to love others, in spite of
their many faults. I pray that as I love, so will I be loved.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Foundation For Life, p. 33

We discover that we receive guidance for our lives to just about the
extent that we stop making demands upon God to give it to us on
order and on our terms.

<< << << >> >> >>

In praying, we ask simply that throughout the day God place in us the
best understanding of His will that we can have for that day, and that
we be given the grace by which we may carry it out.

<< << << >> >> >>

There is a direct linkage among self-examination, meditation, and
prayer. Taken separately, these practices can bring much relief and
benefit. But when they are logically related and interwoven, the result
is an unshakable foundation for life.

12 & 12
1. p. 104
2. p. 102
3. p. 98

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Why do you need those meetings?
Staying active.
Friends and relatives are often grateful when they witness an alcoholic's dramatic recovery after years of horror and pain. However, they sometimes fail to understand the importance of meetings after the alcoholic has been sober for months or years. "Do you have to go to another meeting this week?" a spouse might say, "You're sober now. Why do you need THOSE people?"
Some AA members probably do use the meetings simply as a social outlet and attend more than they need. But no other person can really determine what you or I need to maintain sobriety. Moreover, even in sobriety, we are always dealing with alcohol, which can come back into our lives with stunning force if we ever become careless or foolish. It is much better to go to more meetings than we need than to attend too few or none at all.
There is another side as well. The meetings need us. By attending meetings, we are carrying the AA message and providing a haven for desperate newcomers who need our help.
However, we should be tolerant and understanding when others are critical of our zealous attendance of meetings. It is not necessary that they understand our need. It is only necessary that we understand!
I will remember today that the price of liberty is eternal vigilance. I don't want to change anything----including meeting attendance----, which is necessary for my continued sobriety.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

We must believe the things we teach our children.-------Woodrow Wilson
It may be easy to say the words and phrases we've heard without really meaning them. Someone says something at a meeting that sounds good. Our counselor has a favorite saying. We may say these words,
but are we taking the time to ask the question. Do I believe what I'm saying?
Step Two speaks of, "Came to believe..." By really believing in the Twelve Steps, we let them become part of us. The more we believe in the Steps the more we turn our lives over to them. Hopefully, over time, the Twelve Steps will guide us more and more. We'll speak to our family with respect we've found in the Twelve Steps. Our spirit must truly believe. Then we can work the Steps.
Prayer for the Day:
Higher Power, believing is something that lasts a lifetime. Give me the power to believe even when doubt creeps in.
Action for the Day: My beliefs are changing. Today, in my inventory, I'll ask: Do I believe what I said today?

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

What most of us want is to be heard, to communicate. --Dory Previn
Our personhood is denied; the self we are presenting to the word is negated each time we speak, yet go unheard. "The greatest gift we can give one another is rapt attention." If we want attention, we must also give it. That means letting go of all extraneous thoughts when we're in conversation with someone. We cannot expect to get from others what we are unable or unwilling to give.
Being heard and hearing another person is more than just listening. It's letting ourselves be touched, in an intimate way, by the other's words. We don't want judgment, or shame, or to be discounted when we share who we are with another. We want to know that we have been intimately heard. And when we have a chance to hear another, we listen intently for the words meant for us, words that will stretch our womanhood and bring us closer to our inner selves as well.
The beauty of hearing each other is that it helps us to hear ourselves. We know better who we are when we listen to one another. Every conversation offers us a chance to be real, to help another person be real.
Rapt attention is my greatest gift. If I want to receive it, I must give it.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

On one proposition, however, these men and women are strikingly agreed. Every one of them has gained access to, and believe in, a Power greater than himself. This Power has in each case accomplished the miraculous, the humanly impossible. As a celebrated American statesman put it, “Let’s look at the record.”

p. 50

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

This was around 1935, and it was about this time that I actually started drinking. During the years 1930 to 1935, due to the Depression and its aftermath, business went from bad to worse. I then had my own medical practice in Washington, but the practice slackened and the mail-order business started to fall off. Dad, due to having spent most of his time in a small Virginia town, didn't have too much money, and the money he had saved and the property he had acquired were in Washington. He was in his late fifties, and all that he had undertaken fell upon my shoulders at this death in 1928. For the first couple of years it wasn't too bad because the momentum kept things going. But when things became crucial, everything started going haywire and I started going haywire with them. At this point I believe I had only been intoxicated on maybe three or four occasions, and certainly whiskey was no problem to me.

pp. 235-236

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

These little studies of A.A. Twelve Steps now come to a close. We have been considering so many problems that it may appear that A.A. consists mainly of racking dilemmas and troubleshooting. To a certain extent, that is true. We have been talking about problems because we are problem people who have found a way up and out, and who wish to share our knowledge of that way with all who can use it. For it is only by accepting and solving our problems that we can begin to get right with ourselves and with the world about us, and with Him who presides over us all. Understanding is the key to right principles and attitudes, and right action is the key to good living; therefore the joy of good living is the theme of A.A.'s Twelfth Step.

p. 125

************************************************** *********

While it isn't always easy, if I keep it simple, it works.

I hold firm to faith, so that nothing will weaken my commitment to live in God's light. --Shelley

Regardless of what has happened or whether we understand, we can open ourselves to God's protection and grace. --John Morton

It is in the silence of the heart that God speaks. --Mother Teresa

He who knows the precepts by heart, but fails to practice them, Is like unto one who lights a lamp and then shuts his eyes. --Nagarjuna

Listen or thy tongue will keep thee deaf. --American Indian Proverb

Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.

The heart is wiser than the intellect. --Josiah Holland (1819-1881)

Most of us are just about as happy as we make up our minds to be. --Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

WORK

"We work to become, not to
acquire."
-- Elbert Hubbard

I believe it is easier to get well than it is to stay sick --- but we must
be prepared to work for our sobriety. We need to confront the
disease and discover the "person " that God created. The road to
recovery is rewarding because we cast aside those aspects of our
character that have been destroying us and discover our strengths,
virtues and God-given spirituality.

For years I worked for money or for security or for acclaim --- today
I am working on myself for myself. I work at discovering God in His
world, and I am also finding God in my life. I realize that my creative
work coincides with God's will for the world.

Thank You for the gift of work that enables me to discover more of me.

************************************************** *********

"Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up." James 4:10

My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense - Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world. We know that we have come to know him if we obey his commands. The man who says, "I know him," but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did. 1 John 2:1-6

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Enjoy God. Lord, I hand over all of my cares to You so that for this moment I am peacefully free.

God sends us His message, but we must be willing to receive it and then live it. Lord, when I yield to You, I become free and full of the richness of life.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Goodwill

" Goodwill is best exemplified in service; proper service is doing the right thing for the right reason."

Basic Text p. ix

The spiritual core of our disease is self-centeredness. In dealing with others, the only motive our addiction taught us was selfishness — we wanted what we wanted when we wanted it. Obsession with self was rooted in the very ground of our lives. In recovery, how do we root self-obsession out?

We reverse the effects of our disease by applying a few very simple spiritual principles. To counteract the self-centeredness of our addiction, we learn to apply the principle of goodwill. Rather than seeking to serve only ourselves, we begin serving others. Rather than thinking only about what we can get out of a situation, we learn to think first of the welfare of others. When faced with a moral choice, we learn to stop, recall spiritual principles, and act appropriately.

As we begin "doing the right thing for the right reason;" we can detect a change in ourselves. Where once we were ruled by self-will, now we are guided by our goodwill for others. The chronic self-centeredness of addiction is losing its hold on us. We are learning to "practice these principles in all our affairs"; we are living in our recovery, not in our disease.

Just for today: Wherever I am, whatever I do, I will seek to serve others, not just myself. When faced with a dilemma, I will try to do the right thing for the right reason.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Fear is the absence of faith. --Paul Tillich
We all experience fear. Sometimes we fear small things that only seem large at the time, like a test in school, or meeting a new boss, or going to the dentist. Sometimes we fear big things like serious illness or death, or that someone we love will come to harm. Fear is healthy, and we all feel it. It keeps us from doing foolish things sometimes, but too much fear can also keep us from doing what we need for our growth.
If we have faith in God and in ourselves, we can turn and face whatever frightens us, believing we can, with help, do what seems impossible. And we will, and the fear will vanish. The important first step in dealing with fear is to take action--either by tackling what we fear ourselves, or by asking for help. Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing.
What am I most afraid of?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
To be alive is power,
Existing in itself,
Without a further function,
Omnipotence enough.
--Emily Dickinson
Being a person, a man, in this world is an amazing gift. A spiritual awakening promised by this program is open to us. But today, not all of us feel powerful and alive. We may feel weak, inadequate to our task, perplexed, or stymied. Is this a day in which we are filled with exuberance for the gift of life? Or is this a day when we're feeling subdued by life's burdens?
Perhaps we need to evaluate our perspective. Are we trying to control something or someone? Are we acting as if the world should be as we want rather than as it is? Have our individual wills exceeded their natural bounds and spoiled the simple joy of being "without a further function"?
May I find the pleasure and exuberance today that come with being alive. The simple power to be a person is "omnipotence enough."


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Trusting Our Higher Power
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood him. --Step Three of Al-Anon
So much talk about a Higher Power, God, as we understand God. So much joy as we come to understand Him. Spirituality and spiritual growth are the foundations of change. Recovery from codependency is not a do it yourself task.
Is God a relentless taskmaster? A hardhearted, shaming wizard with tricks up the sleeve? Is God deaf? Uncaring? Haphazard? Unforgiving?
No.
A loving God, a caring God. That is the God of our recovery No more pain than is necessary for usefulness, healing, and cleansing. As much goodness and joy as our heart can hold, as soon as our heart is healed, open, and ready to receive God: approving, accepting, instantly forgiving.
God has planned little gifts along the way to brighten our day/and sometimes big, delightful surprises perfectly timed, perfect for us.
A Master Artist, God will weave together all our joy, sadness and experience to create a portrait of our life with depth, beauty, sensitivity, color, humor, and feeling.
God as we understand Him: A loving God. The God of our recovery.
Today, I will open myself to the care of a loving God. Then, I will let God show me love.


As I gently pull back each layer that has been blocking me from being the best of who I am, I dare look a bit further and then a bit further yet. I know that I am not alone on this path and God is guiding me every inch of the way. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Cherish Today’s Lessons

“I’m brokenhearted about my divorce,” the man said. “I’ve spent four years searching for a new wife, trying to recreate my family, trying to jam the pieces of the picture back in place. All I’ve gotten from my desperate search is more pain and anguish. It’s hurt other people. It’s hurt me. I’m tired of trying to manipulate other people to meet my own needs, to postpone my own grief.

Some of us may be desperately trying to recreate the life we once had. But fear, pain, and the desperation won’t attract the answer we’re seeking. Desperation attracts desperation. Pain attracts pain. And so the downward spiral goes. Yes, loss hurts. Sometimes life hurts,too. But loss can’t be negotiated. Becoming obsessed with putting the pieces back in place is an understandable reaction, but it won’t work. Yesterday cannot be superimposed on today. We need to go one step further.

Feel the obsession, and let it go. Feel the desperation, then release that. Come back to the lessons of today. They’re different from the lessons of yesterday, but just as valuable.

We face many losses along the way. People we love disappear from our lives, we may lose a career, money, or something else we valued. We can lose our dreams,too. But looking for quick replacements as a way to avoid feeling pain about the loss won’t work. And we’ll miss the lessons. Before we can go on, we must feel our sadness about what we lost. Losses demand acceptance.

Eventually life will send you new people and new dreams. Cherish this time to grow and learn. Cherish what the universe is teaching you now.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Let go of unreasonable fears

We had planned on this day for a month. Now it had finally arrived. Mr friend and I were going kayaking in the ocean– it was going to be a first for us both.

We had the kayak and the life preservers. He showed up at the house, ready to go. The sun was shining, and the surf was pounding gently enough to be safe. He had gotten himself all ready for his event. He was wearing a hat, a Hawaiian shirt, and big floppy sandals on his feet.

We put on our life jackets. The man showed up at the door to train us in the proper way to kayak. First it was my turn. I was scared, but not too scared. I knew if we turned over, I’d just float.

I jumped in. The instructor pushed us out before the big wave came. He jumped in. We paddled like heck. When the big wave came, I yelled “ahh” and raised my oar high over my head, like the man said, to be safe. We went through three more of these waves. They looked big. I was scared each time. But soon we passed the surf, and we came to a quiet, clear place. We paddled around for a while. Then it was time to go back to shore and train my friend. I was excited. A little more training, and my friend and I would be ready to go out on the boat together.

I got out of the kayak. My instructor held the boat. My friend began to climb in, so they could push out. Just then a wave came. My friend got nervous and shaky. He screamed. The boat turned over. He fell out.

He lay there in the surf. The boat slipped over close to his head. He started screaming some more.

“It’s just a piece of plastic,” I said quietly. “All you have to do is move it away.”

“I’m drowning,” he said, gasping mouthfuls of water.

“No, your not,” I said. “You’re still on the shore. You’ve got water in your mouth from screaming. All you really need to do is sit up.”

My friend sat up. The instructor politely said the waves were getting a little high, and he didn’t think he’d be able to train my friend that day, and then he left. My friend and I quietly put the kayak away.

Sometimes, saying woohoo means working through our fears. Fear can be a good thing. It can signal danger and protect us. Sometimes our fears are bigger than life and bigger than they need be.

Many of us have panic and anxiety attacks. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. But sometimes we can calm ourselves down by reinforcing a little reality. Maybe we’re not really drowning after all. Maybe all we have to do to save our lives is just sit up.

Explain to yourself that your fears are unrealistic and you don’t need to be that afraid. Instead of screaming for help and upsetting yourself, learn to calm yourself down.

God, help me let go of my unreasonable fears, the ones that are preventing me from living my life.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Looking back, I realize just how much of my life has been spent in dwelling upon the faults of others. It provided much self-satisfaction, to be sure, but I see now just how subtle and actually perverse the process became. After all was said and done, the net effect of dwelling on the so-called faults of others was self-granted permission to remain comfortably unaware of my own defects. Do I still point my finger at others and thus self-deceptively overlook my own shortcomings?

Today I Pray

May I see that my preoccupation with the faults of others is really a smokescreen to keep me from taking a hard look at my own, as well as a way to bolster my own failing ego. May I check out the “why’s” of my blaming.

Today I Will Remember

Blame-saying
Is game-playing

****************************************

One More Day

Every calamity is a spur and valuable hint. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Events which felt like calamities when we were young have little importance as we get older. Experiences we have labeled “disastrous” — not having a date for the prom or failing a math test — now are unimportant or possible even amusing.

Understanding that many events have only brief importance can help us view current problems more realistically. Not having enough money at the end of the month, family disagreements, and even a flare-up or worsening of a chronic illness are all very important, and they require our attention or adjustment. But we deal with these problems better because we’re learned that few, if any, problems are really “disastrous” They’re inconvenient or even painful, but our lives can accommodate them. We go on.

I won’t see calamities in today’s problems and inconveniences.

************************************

Food For Thought

Giving Thanks

I am a grateful compulsive overeater, abstaining just for today. I am thankful for my life, for the chance to grow and solve problems and love and enjoy what is beautiful. I give thanks for the insights, which have come out of struggle and despair.

I am thankful for OA. Without it, I would still be isolated in a hopeless attempt to control overeating my way, by myself. I give thanks for the serenity and joy which increase daily as I follow the OA program. I give thanks for the love and support, which come to me from fellow members.

Especially, I am thankful for abstinence. By choosing and accepting this gift, I enter a new world of freedom. No longer am I driven by compulsion. I give thanks for the work and play and love which abstinence makes possible.

Accept my thanks.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ Love ~

The supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved.
Victor Hugo

All of my life I felt unloved. Deep in my soul I was also convinced that I was unworthy of love. Nonetheless I craved love deeply.

In a desperate attempt to feel OK, I forsook the God of my childhood and declared that there was no God. I spiralled further and further into the depths of despair, unable to feel or give love. In my downward spiral, I turned to food to block feelings of unworthiness.

I entered Program dying of addiction as well as the deep sorrow of the loveless. I thought I was different from everyone else, that no one could possibly understand me. I had no peers, no real friends.

However, once in Program I found others just like me! I started to belong and to develop true friendships. In my desire to belong, I worked the Twelve Steps as others did and found a God of My Understanding. GOMU is a loving God. This God supports and guides me while as helping me learn to give and receive love. Love has brought me back to life.

One day at a time ...
Hand-in-hand with my Higher Power, I love and am loved.
~ Michel ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that HE DOES NOT HAVE TO AGREE WITH YOUR CONCEPTION OF GOD. He can choose any conception he likes, provided it makes sense to him. THE MAIN THING IS THAT HE BE WILLING TO BELIEVE IN A POWER GREATER THAN HIMSELF AND THAT HE LIVE BY SPIRITUAL PRINCIPLES. - Pg. 93 - Working With Others

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

One choice you can make in the coming days is to simply allow the loss of your addiction to be true. You will be an emotional orphan for only a short time, because you have a new and loving family in the fellowship.

I reach out to my Spiritual Source for a new understanding, as I adjust to new emotional alliances.

Little Dreams

Today I will do some small thing to make my day more beautiful and positive. I only need to do a little better. I don't need to reach for the moon or become the perfect anything. Achieving little dreams will enhance my sense of self and move me a bit forward. They will add up. They give me something positive to imagine. Little dreams are manageable, they don't overwhelm me and make me feel like I am constantly failing or running in place. They let me feel like I've achieved something real and purposeful. They give my day a positive focus. I will dream a little dream today. I will do something positive that gets me closer to a goal or makes a contribution to my world. Rather than complain about what isn't here that I want, I will take baby steps to create something.

I will take one small step

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

When do you begin helping a newcomer? When you see a newcomer. Don't sweat it; just do it.

When I work with a drunk, the drunk I'm working on is me.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Don't force solutions.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

As I gently pull back each layer that has been blocking me from being the best of who I am, I dare look a bit further and then a bit further yet. I know that I am not alone on this path and God is guiding me every inch of the way.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I looked for God all over. And that's where I found him; All over. - Phil P.

[bluidkiti]

February 3

Daily Reflections

FILLING THE VOID

We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. "Do I now
believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater
than myself?" As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is
willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his
way.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 47

I was always fascinated with the study of scientific principles. I was
emotionally and physically distant from people while I pursued
Absolute Knowledge. God and spirituality were meaningless
academic exercises. I was a modern man of science, knowledge was
my Higher Power. Given the right set of equations, life was merely
another problem to solve. Yet my inner self was dying from my outer
man's solution to life's problems and the solution was alcohol. In
spite of my intelligence, alcohol became my Higher Power. It was
through the unconditional love which emanated from A.A. people and
meetings that I was able to discard alcohol as my Higher Power. The
great void was filled. I was no longer lonely and apart from life. I
had found a true power greater than myself, I had found God's love.
There is only one equation which really matters to me now: God is in
A.A.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

By drinking, we escaped from boredom for a while. We almost forgot
our troubles. But when we sobered up, our troubles were twice as
bad. Drinking had only made them worse. In A.A., we really escape
boredom. Nobody's bored at an A.A. meeting. We stick around after
it's over and we hate to leave. Drinking gave us a temporary feeling
of importance. When we're drinking, we kid ourselves into thinking
we are somebody. We tell tall stories to build ourselves up. In A.A.,
we don't want that kind of self-importance. We have real
self-respect and honesty and humility. Have I found something much
better and more satisfactory than drinking?

Meditation For The Day

I believe that my faith and God's power can accomplish anything in
human relationships. There is no limit to what these two things can
do in this field. Only believe, and anything can happen. Saint Paul
said; "I can do all things through Him who strengtheneth me." All
walls that divide you from other human beings can fall by your faith
and God's power. These are the two essentials. Everyone can be
moved by these.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may try to strengthen my faith day by day. I pray that I
may rely more and more on God's power.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

"Not Allied With Any Sect . . .", p. 34

"While A.A. has restored thousands of poor Christians to their
churches, and has made believers out of atheists and agnostics, it has
also made good A.A.'s out of those belonging to the Buddhist, Islamic,
and Jewish faiths. For example, we question very much whether our
Buddhist members in Japan would ever have joined this Society had
A.A. officially stamped itself a strictly Christian movement.

"You can easily convince yourself of this by imagining that A.A. started
among the Buddhists and that they then told you you couldn't join them
unless you became a Buddhist, too. If you were a Christian alcoholic
under these circumstances, you might well turn your face to the wall and
die."

Letter, 1954

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

No Coincidences_____Guidance
The early history of AA still sparkles with fortunate coincidences that
moved the fellowship forward. It was miraculous, for example, that Bill W's
telephone call in 1935 was to a woman who "just happened" to know Dr. Bob, a
suffering alcoholic.
When we are in tune with AA's spiritual program, we know with absolute
certainty that there really are no coincidences. Our Higher Power is in charge
and all things really are working together for good, even though this is not
always apparent at first.
If we let this Higher Power guide and direct our lives, we will be
thrilled and delighted by a number of wonder coincidences. We may happen to pick up
the magazine or book that gives us information and meet a person whose advice
changes our lives. Or we follow a hunch and make an unusual decision that
leads to a number of opportunities we never dreamed of.
We cannot force these fortunate "coincidences" to happen or direct their
course, except by following the program every day. But we never need fret
about the future if we have placed our lives in God's hands. There are no
coincidences…. Only the hand of God ceaselessly at work.
I will work this day as if everything depended on me, but at the same
time I will know that everything really depends on God.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.---Erma Bombeck
We often hear, "Stick with the winners." Not everyone in Twelve Step meetings is there for recovery.. But many members follow a Twelve Step way of living. We need to find those people. This is really true when it comes to finding a sponsor. Look for a sponsor who gets good things from his or her program. Why pick a sponsor who isn't happy in the program? Recovery is hard work. You deserve the best. Find the best sponsor you can. Remember, ours is a selfish program. we're fighting for our lives.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me find the best in my program. Help me find a good sponsor, so we can get as much from each other and this program as we can.
Today's Action: Today I'll think about what it means to have a good sponsor.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

When we begin to take our failures non-seriously, it means we are ceasing to be afraid of them. It is of immense importance to learn to laugh at ourselves. --Katherine Mansfield
Perfectionism and its control over our lives stands seriously in the way of our growth and well-being, emotionally, spiritually, and even physically. Life's lessons come through failures probably more than successes. Through our failures we learn humility. We learn to look to others for help and guidance. We learn how to let others fail, too. We fail because we are human.
When we no longer fear failure, we are free to attempt greater feats. We dare to learn more, and life is fuller for it--not just our own lives, but the lives that we touch.
Laughter over our mistakes eases the risk of trying again. Laughter keeps us young, and the lighthearted find more pleasure in each day.
I will fail at something I try today. I can laugh about it, though. My laughter will open the way to another try.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

Here are thousands of men and women, worldly indeed. They flatly declare that since they have come to believe in a Power greater than themselves, to take a certain attitude toward that Power, and to do certain simple things. There has been a revolutionary change in their way of living and thinking. In the face of collapse and despair, in the face of the total failure of their human resources, they found that a new power, peace, happiness, and sense of direction flowed into them. This happened soon after they wholeheartedly met a few simple requirements. Once confused and baffled by the seeming futility of existence, they show the underlying reasons why they were making heavy going of life. Leaving aside the drink question, they tell why living was so unsatisfactory. They show how the change came over them. When many hundreds of people are able to say that the consciousness of the Presence of God is today the most important fact of their lives, they present a powerful reason why one should have faith.

pp. 50-51

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

My father had purchased a restaurant, which he felt would take up some of my spare time, and that's how I met Vi. She came in for her dinner. I'd known her five or six months. To get rid of me one evening, she decided to go to the movies. She and another friend. A very good friend of mine who owned a drugstore across the street from us came by only about two hours later and said he had seen Vi downtown. I said that she told me she was going to the movies, and I became foolishly disturbed about it, and as things snowballed, I decided to go out and drink. That's the first time I was ever really drunk in my life. The fear of the loss of Vi and the feeling that, though she had the right to do as she pleased, she should have told me the truth about it, upset me. That was my trouble. I thought all women should be perfect.

p. 236

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

With each passing day of our lives, may every one of us sense more deeply the inner meaning of A.A. simple prayer: God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, Courage to change the things we can, And wisdom to know the difference.

p. 125

************************************************** *********

Decide to be happy, knowing it's an attitude, a habit gained from daily practice, and not a result or payoff. --Denis Waitley

I depend on God, as God has a plan for my life. --Shelley

If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never be fulfilled. If your happiness depends on money, you will never be happy with yourself. Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you. --Lao Tzu

Only if we follow can God lead the way. --Sandra Roberts Still

To live with the least amount of frustration, you must remind yourself that everything always works out for the best.

Make the most of every situation, especially those you dread.

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

STATISTICS

"There are three kinds of lies,
lies, damned lies and statistics."
-- Benjamin Disraeli

I used to be able to hide behind anything --- even statistics. Figures,
and the quoting of figures, can expand the ego and keep you sick.
They can confuse the issues by making everything complicated.

In the field of alcoholism statistics are important for comparison and
research but they can never be a substitute for a "rigorous honesty"
that is based upon personal experience. I do not think that statistics
alone stopped a person from drinking, but the sharing of a personal
suffering and victory can produce an identification that leads to
change.

As a recovering alcoholic I need to know the statistics concerning my
disease but I also need to know that today's recovery is based upon
yesterday's honest sharing.

Let me always see the faces behind the numbers.

************************************************** *********

"He will cover you with his feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart." Psalms 91:4

I sought the Lord and He answered me. Psalm 34:4

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life? And why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you--you of little faith? Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What will we eat?' or ‘What will we drink?' or ‘What will we wear?' For it is the Gentiles who strive for all these things; and indeed your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. "So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today's trouble is enough for today. Matthew 6:25-34

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

As God's children we have inherited all of His promises. Faith in You, Lord, refreshes my soul as nothing else can.

To have courage, think courageous, act courageous, and pray to God for courage. Lord, You are full of love for all who come to You.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

We Need Each Other

"Anyone may join us, regardless of age, race, sexual identity creed, religion, or lack of religion."
Basic Text p. 9

Addiction closed our minds to anything new or different. We didn't need anyone or anything, we thought. There was nothing of value to be found in anyone from a different neighborhood, a different racial or ethnic background, or a different social or economic class. We may have thought that if it was different, it was bad.

In recovery, we can't afford such attitudes. We came to NA because our very best thinking had gotten us nowhere. We must open our minds to experience that works, no matter where it comes from, if we hope to grow in our recovery.

Regardless of our personal backgrounds, we all have two things in common with one another in NA that we share with no one else: our disease, and our recovery. We depend on one another for our shared experience—and the broader that experience, the better. We need every bit of experience, every different angle on our program we can find to meet the many challenges of living clean.

Recovery often isn't easy. The strength we need to recover, we draw from our fellow NA members. Today, we are grateful for the diversity of our group's membership, for in that diversity we find our strength.

Just for today: I know that the more diverse my groups experience is, the better able my group will be to offer me support in the different circumstances I find myself facing. Today, I welcome addicts from all backgrounds to my home group.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole . . . nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it . . .. It was a hobbithole, and that means comfort. —J. R. R. Tolkien
Home is a place of comfort. When we go away and have to adjust to a different bed and someone else's cooking, we quickly discover how comfortable our own home is. Comfort in a home is more than just a familiar bed and favorite food; it is something we can give to each other. We can make home a place where we can relax and be ourselves without fear of rejection.
Each of us needs a special little place where we can come and seek refuge from the world, our own little "fort." Children are often busy making "forts," but all of us in the family need to work at making the place where we live together a fort where we can all gather for rest.
What can I add to our comfort today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Compassion is ... a spirituality and a way of living and walking through life. It is the way we treat all there is in life ourselves, our bodies, our imaginations and dreams, our neighbors, our enemies.... Compassion is a spirituality as if creation mattered. It is treating all creation as holy and as divine..., which is what it is. --Matthew Fox
In our search for growth, serenity, and contentment, we can start at a very practical level. Simply treat ourselves, inside and out, and everything around us in a respectful and caring way. Many men have not learned how to do that. Some of us have learned to accept abuse and pain, or to be tough and abusive.
We can learn about being in a healthy relationship, about befriending ourselves and others and all of creation. With practice, we will learn more and more about having compassion. As we do, our self-centeredness and our self-pity will fall away.
Today, I will be compassionate toward each of the details of creation, and practice acceptance both within and. outside myself.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Rejecting Shame
Shame can be a powerful force in our life. It is the trademark of dysfunctional families.
Authentic, legitimate guilt is the feeling or thought that what we did is not okay. It indicates that our behavior needs to be corrected or altered, or an amend needs to be made.
Shame is an overwhelming negative sense that who we are isn't okay. Shame is a no win situation. We can change our behaviors, but we can't change who we are. Shame can propel us deeper into self-defeating and sometimes self-destructive behaviors.
What are the things that can cause us to feel shame? We may feel ashamed when we have a problem or someone we love has a problem. We may feel ashamed for making mistakes or for succeeding. We may feel ashamed about certain feelings or thoughts. We may feel ashamed when we have fun, feel good, or are vulnerable enough to show ourselves to others. Some of us feel ashamed just for being.
Shame is a spell others put on us to control us, to keep us playing our part in dysfunctional systems. It is a spell many of us have learned to put on ourselves.
Learning to reject shame can change the quality of our life. It's okay to be who we are. We are good enough. Our feelings are okay. Our past is okay. It's okay to have problems, make mistakes, and struggle to find our path. It's okay to be human and cherish our humanness.
Accepting ourselves is the first step toward recovery. Letting go of shame about who we are is the next important step.
Today, I will watch for signs that I have fallen into shame's trap. If I get hooked into shame, I will get myself out by accepting myself and affirming that it's okay to be who I am.


I am no longer a victim of my past. I am free to move in new directions today. I am at choice in my life. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Break Through Your Resistance

We sometimes resist new lessons. And what we resist the most is likely to be what we most need to learn.

Our lessons usually come with inner conflict. The action we should be taking, the idea we should be learning is sometimes hidden behind a wall of resistance. There’s a border, a barrier we need to cross to get into the heart of the lesson. Most times, that barrier is within us. Lessons require us to let go of old feelings, old beliefs. If they didn’t, they wouldn’t be lessons. We’d already know them. Sometimes, the very thing we feel guiltiest about doing, the place we’re most resistant to visiting, the person we’re most convinced we shouldn’t contact, or the behavior we’re tormenting ourselves most about is exactly what we need to be doing.

And more often than not, the lesson we’re learning is not what we think it is. We need to embrace the surprise element of life– embrace the mystery of life as it unfolds, as the lessons appear, as we grow and change.

Do what you need to do to break through your resistance. Often that means simply seeing your resistance for what it is. Remember that the point of greatest resistance is often the place of greatest learning.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Deal with panic and anxiety

I can still remember the day. It was shortly after my divorce. I was a single parent with no money, and two young children. It came upon me suddenly, out of the blue. I couldn’t breathe. My chest hurt. My heart hurt. I couldn’t stop it. I panicked. The more I panicked, the worst it got.

I called 911. The ambulance came. They gave me some oxygen, then politely told me not to worry; it was just a panic attack. I had experienced another one of those attacks, a long time ago. Right after I first married the children’s father, I had shut myself down from anxiety. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak from the fear I felt.

Many people experience panic and anxiety attacks. Maybe it’s happened to you. Maybe you’ve had only one or two incidents of it; maybe panic and anxiety make regular appearances in your life. Most people I’ve met have experienced fear.

These are a few little clues I’ve learned that have helped me to deal with my own attacks.

. Breathe. Whenever you panic, our breath comes in shallow, awkward spurts. Be deliberately breathing slowly and calmly, we can slow our panc down. We feed it by breathing fast. We put our bodies on hyperalert. If we breath as though we’re relaxed, our bodies will start slowing down.

. Don’t respond to your panic with more fear. Sometimes we double what we’re going through by having an emotional reaction to our initial reaction. We’re afraid, because we’re feeling fear. Let yourself go through the original feeling without reacting to yourself.

. Instead of focusing on your fear, let yourself be aware that you’re feeling it, but deliberately do something that calms you down. You won’t want to do this. Your panic will want you to do something else, something that feeds panic and makes it grow. Do something calming and quiet, even though that activity doesn’t feel right to you. It could be reading a meditation, listening to some quiet music, taking a shower, or saying a prayer. We all have things that help calm us down. Find something that works for you.

If panic and anxiety are a continual problem, seek professional help. But if they are only isolated incidents in your life, you may be able to help yourself.
One tool that has never let me down when it comes to anxiety and fear is working Step One of the Twelve Step program. I admit that I’m powerless over my panic and fear, and my life has become unamangeable. Then I ask God what I need to do next.

Don’t let your fears run your life. Make it a goal to get through them. Ask them what they’re trying to tell you. You may be on a path that’s new, and your body is just reacting to that. There may be a hidden emotion underneath all this fear, something you’d rather not see. Or maybe you and your life are just changing so fast that everything in your world is brand new. Be gentle and loving with yourself and others.

God, help me welcome all the new experiences in my life. Give me the courage to calmly walk my path today, knowing I’m right where I need to be.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

The Program enables us to discover two roadblocks that keep us from seeing the value and comfort of the spiritual approach: self-justification and self-righteousness. The first grimly assures me that I’m always right. The second mistakenly comforts me with the delusion that I’m better than other people — “holier than thou.” Just for Today, will I pause abruptly while rationalizing and ask myself, “Why am I doing this? Is this self-justification really honest?”

Today I Pray

May I overcome the need to be “always right” and know the cleansing feeling of release that comes with admitting, openly, a mistake. May I be wary of setting myself up as an example of self-control and fortitude, and give credit where it is due — to a Higher Power.

Today I Will Remember

To err is human, but I need to admit it.

****************************************

One More Day

Every new adjustment is a crisis in self-esteem…. – Eric Hoffer

Wouldn’t it be nice if our self-esteem could be as firmly rooted as our personalities seem to have been by the time we started school? Unfortunately that’s not often the case. Self-esteem is very delicate and remains subject to the whims of all external circumstances including how people act toward us and how we react, in turn, to them.

An illness that changes how we look or how we think of ourselves can be continually demanding. Fighting the battle to maintain a good self-image requires adjustments of our time and goals. Making these adjustments turns our disappointments into chances for success.

I must continue to work on being a whole person and try to develop all my facets — spiritual, emotional, and physical.

************************************

Food For Thought

Food Is Not the Only Problem

The longer we are in OA, the more we realize that it is not only food which is our problem, but life. Our eating problem is also a living problem. As we maintain abstinence from compulsive overeating, our way of living changes.

Many of us have lived too much for ourselves and by ourselves. It is our egocentricity which has been our undoing. We have accepted no authority higher than our own whim and impulse, and we have been angry and depressed when people and events did not follow our preferences. Eating was an area in which we exerted our omnipotence, and appetite was our god.

When we are willing to acknowledge our dependency upon a Power greater than ourselves and when we become committed to abstinence from compulsive overeating, our living is put in order. When we eat right, we live right.

Order my living so that I may eat to serve You.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ Being Joyful ~

As I stumble through this life, help me to create more laughter than tears.
Never let me become so indifferent that I will fail to see the wonder in the eyes of a child.
Never let me forget that my total effort is to cheer people, make them forget,
at least momentarily, the unpleasantness in their lives.
And in my final moment, may I hear You whisper:
"When you made My people smile, you made Me smile."
A Clown's Prayer (Author Unknown)

I have made so many people angry with me, so many people cry, so many people worry and despair of me. So many people have been resentful of me. My disease dictated how I lived my life, if you could call it living.

Then I came to this program and I found a new way to live, and I found joy such as I have never found before, anywhere. The program taught me not to take life so seriously. The Big Book of AA tells me on page 132, "But we are not a glum lot. If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn't want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life." I need to remember that. I need to work my steps, stay in conscious contact with my Higher Power, but boy oh boy, do I ever need to remember that I need to learn that I am not a bad person getting good, just a sick person getting well. Even sick people have fun. I'm a sick person recovering on a daily basis from a terminal disease that was killing me, but recovery snatched me from the brink of death. Now I can't help but see the beauty of this crazy, wonderful world we live in.

One day at a time ...
I am warmed and my heart sings at the thought that today I have made someone smile. Please, dear God, let me continue to do so.
~ Marlene ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Perhaps your husband has been living in that strange world of alcoholism where everything is distorted and exaggerated. You can see that he really does love you with his better self. Of course, there is such a thing as incompatibility, but in nearly every instance the alcoholic only seems to be unloving and inconsiderate; it is usually because he is warped and sickened that he says and does these appalling things. Today most of our men are better husbands and fathers than ever before. - Pg. 108 - To Wives

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

In this moment you may feel the most human and most powerless time of your entire life. In the coming weeks and months, many changes will sweep over your life and your person. Try not to hide from the profound changes, but to understand them.

Keep me steady that I may understand my world as it changes from day to day and even from moment to moment.

Giving

Today I give with both hands. Giving for its own sake is the spiritual way and actually releases the gift. When I give with one hand and take with the other, I give only half of what I have and receive only half of what might be given to me. I limit myself in two ways. Somehow the universe responds to clear intention. When I fully release a gift, it goes to where it is supposed to go and what returns to me comes when and how it is right.

I am able to give with both hands

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Life on earth is one of polarity. We feel the comfort of love because we know the pain of rejection; we know the satisfaction of a full belly because we know the emptiness of hunger. Without darkness we can't appreciate the light; without cold we can't cherish the warmth. We know the joy of recovery because we came from the depths of despair.

I am not what I am in spite of my disease; I am what I am because of it.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Alcoholics and addicts - fast talkers, slow thinkers.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I am no longer a victim of my past. I am free to move in new directions today. I am at choice in my life.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

We're all rebels who want to be hugged. - Charlie C.

[bluidkiti]

February 4

Daily Reflections

WHEN FAITH IS MISSING

Sometimes A.A. comes harder to those who have lost or
rejected faith than to those who never had any faith
at all, for they think they have faith and found it
wanting. They have tried the way of faith and the way
of no faith.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 28

I was so sure God had failed me that I became ultimately
defiant, though I knew better, and plunged into a final
drinking binge. My faith turned bitter and that was no
coincidence. Those who once had great faith hit bottom
harder. It took time to rekindle my faith, though I
came to A.A. I was grateful intellectually to have
survived such a great fall, but my heart felt callous.
Still, I stuck with the A.A. program; the alternatives
were too bleak! I kept coming back and gradually my
faith was resurrected.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Treating others to drinks gave us a kind of satisfaction.
We liked to say, "Have a drink on me." But we were not
really doing the other people a favor. We were only
helping them to get drunk, especially if they happened to
be an alcoholic. In A.A., we really try to help other
alcoholics. We build them up instead of tearing them
down. Drinking created a sort of fellowship. But it
really was a false fellowship, because it was based
on selfishness. We used our drinking companions for
our own pleasure. In A.A., we have real fellowship,
based on unselfishness and a desire to help each other.
And we make real friends, not fair weather friends. With
sobriety, have I got everything that drinking's got, without
the headaches?

Meditation For The Day

I know that God cannot teach anyone who is trusting in a
crutch. I will throw away the crutch of alcohol and walk
in God's power and spirit. God's power will so
invigorate me that I shall indeed walk on to victory.
There is never any limit to God's power. I will go step
by step, one day at a time. God's will shall be revealed
to me as I go forward.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may have more and more dependence on God.
I pray that I may throw away my alcohol crutch and let
God's power take its place.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Suffering Transmuted, p. 35

"A.A. is no success story in the ordinary sense of the word. It is a story
of suffering transmuted, under grace, into spiritual progress."

<< << << >> >> >>

For Dr. Bob, the insatiable craving for alcohol was evidently a physical
phenomenon which bedeviled several of his first years in A.A., a time
when only days and nights of carrying the message to other alcoholics
could cause him to forget about drinking. Although his craving was
hard to withstand, it doubtless did account for some part of the intense
incentive that went into forming Akron's Group Number One.

Bob's spiritual release did not come easily; it was to be painfully slow. It
always entailed the hardest kind of work and the sharpest vigilance.

1. Letter, 1959
2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 69

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

The Rewards of Honesty
Honesty
Sometimes we think that honesty is simply too painful and demanding---- all sacrifice with no gain. If we are completely honest with ourselves, however, the results can only be positive.
What are the advantages of being entirely honest about our motives and feelings? One benefit is that we never will have to face the disillusionment and humiliation that come from self-deception. Surely we had enough of that while drinking.
Honesty also speaks for itself. People know intuitively when a person is completely honest, and they are drawn to that person because of it. An honest AA member-one who has truly faced personal faults---- also becomes an example to others.
The honest person has self-respect and a clear conscious. In real honesty, there is no inner struggle to keep up appearances or to pretend we are anybody except ourselves.
Honesty makes us comfortable rather than pained, relaxed rather than anxious, and decisive rather than confused. These are rich rewards for people who once lived in the false world of alcoholism.
I'll try to be honest in all things today. In any case, I will at least be honest with my self about my true motives and feelings.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

We do not remember days, we remember moments.----Cesare Pavese
It's the moment that's important. Each moment holds choice. Our spirits grow through working our program moment to moment. Moments lead to days, days to years, and years to a life of honest recovery.
It will be the moments of choice that we remember. The moment we call a friend instead of being alone.
The moment we decide to go for a walk instead of arguing with our partner. The moment we decide to go to an extra meeting instead of drinking or using other drugs. The moments lead us to our Higher Power.
These moments teach us that we're human, that we need others. At these moments, we know others care about us--our joys, and our struggles.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me remember that my recovery is made up of many moments of choice.
Today’s Action: I'll look back over the last twenty-four hours. What moments come to mind? Why were they important to me.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Genius is the talent for seeing things straight. It is seeing things in a straight line without any bend or break or aberration of sight, seeing them as they are, without any warping of vision. --Maude Adams
We are learning, each day of our abstinence, to see more clearly what lies before us. Less and less are we hampered by our own selfish needs, distorting that which we face. We all have within us the talent for seeing things as they really are. But it is a process that takes practice, a process of turning within to the untapped talent which is one of the gifts of a spiritual life.
We are spiritual entities, one and all. And the genius to see as God sees is ours for the asking. This program is paving our way. Each day it becomes easier to live an honest life. Each day we trust more the people we encounter. And each day we take greater risks being our true selves.
The need to distort that which we see ahead lessens, as we begin reaping the benefits of the honest, caring, spirit-filled life. Our unhealthy egos stood in our way in the past. And they can get in the way even now, if we forget to look ahead with the eyes of our inner genius.
My path today is straight, clean, and love-filled, if I choose to follow my genius.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

This world of ours has made more material progress in the last century than in all the millenniums which went before. Almost everyone knows the reason. Students of ancient history tell us that the intellect of men in those days was equal to the best of today. Yet in ancient times, material progress was painfully slow. The spirit of modern scientific inquiry, research and invention was almost unknown. In the realm of the material, men’s minds were fettered by superstition, tradition, and all sort of fixed ideas. Some of the contemporaries of Columbus thought a round earth preposterous. Others came near putting Galileo to death for his astronomical heresies.

p. 51

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

I don't think I actually started to drink pathologically until approximately 1935. About that time I had lost practically all my property except the place we were living in. Things had just gone from bad to worse. It meant that I had to give up a lot of the things that I had been accustomed to, and that wasn't the easiest thing in the world for me. I think that was basically the thing that started me drinking in 1935. I started drinking alone then. I'd go into my home with a bottle, and I remember clearly how I would look around to see if Vi was watching. Something should have told me then that things were haywire. I can remember watching her. There came a time when she spoke to me about it, and I would say that I had a bad cold or that I wasn't feeling well. That went on for maybe two months, and then she got after me again about drinking. At that time the repeal whiskeys were back, and I'd go to the store and buy my whiskey and take it to my office and put it under the desk, first in one place and then in another, and there soon was an accumulation of empty bottles. My brother-in-law was living with us at that time, and I said to Vi, "Maybe the bottles are Brother's. I don't know. Ask him about it. I don't know anything about the bottles." I actually wanted a drink, besides feeling that I had to have a drink. From that point on, it's just the average drinker's story.

pp. 236-237

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition One - "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. Unity."

The unity of Alcoholics Anonymous it the most cherished quality our Society has. Our lives, the lives of all to come, depend squarely upon it. We stay whole, or A.A. dies. Without unity, the heart of A.A. would cease to beat; our world arteries would no longer carry the life-giving grace of God; His gift to us would be spent aimlessly. Back again in their caves, alcoholics would reproach us and say, "What a great thing A.A. might have been!"

p. 129

************************************************** *********

If we had no Winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; If we did not sometimes taste the adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.
--Anne Bradstreet

"Change is what happens when the pain of holding on becomes greater than the fear of letting go!" --Anonymous

Some flowers grow best in the sun; others do well in the shade. God plants us where we grow best. --Unknown

To go fast, row slowly. --Norman Vincent Peale

"Storms make trees take deeper roots." --Claude McDonald

God's love and grace are bigger than all our worries. --Denise DeKemper

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

INTELLIGENCE

"The brighter you are, the more
you have to learn."
-- Don Herold

The one thing I know in sobriety is how much I do not know! I thought
I knew every thing about God because I was a priest, only to discover
that I had made Him a prisoner of the Church. Once I was willing to
free Him from my prison, I discovered a freedom and awareness that
daily fascinates and astounds me.

Today I see that the glory of God shines within my pain, within my
loneliness, within my confusion, and the acceptance of my disease is the
key to recovery. Today the suffering enables me to discover a realistic
spirituality --- and it is okay to be confused!

With each new day, Lord, let me learn something --- even if it is that I
have not learned anything that day!

************************************************** *********

"Nevertheless we, according to His promise, look for new heavens and a new earth in which righteousness dwells." 2 Peter 3:13

You were formerly darkness, but now you are light in the Lord; walk as children of light. Ephesians 5:8

"I will instruct you and teach you." Psalm 32:8

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

One of life's greatest rewards is not what we get, but what we become. Lord, teach me as I am able to learn and give me the courage to be all that I can.

When we have to justify our actions, it may be that our actions are not just. Lord, Your will is goodness. May I always have the strength and courage to choose Your way so that I can simplify my life and enjoy the peace of Your presence.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Feeling Good Isn't The Point

"For us, recovery is more than just pleasure."
Basic Text p. 42

In our active addiction, most of us knew exactly how we were going to feel from one day to the next. All we had to do was read the label on the bottle or know what was in the bag. We planned our feelings, and our goal for each day was to feel good.

In recovery, we're liable to feel anything from one day to the next, even from one minute to the next. We may feel energetic and happy in the morning, then strangely let down and sad in the afternoon. Because we no longer plan our feelings for the day each morning, we could end up having feelings that are somewhat inconvenient, like feeling tired in the morning and wide-awake at bedtime.

Of course, there's always the possibility we could feel good, but that isn't the point. Today, our main concern is not feeling good but learning to understand and deal with our feelings, no matter what they are. We do this by working the steps and sharing our feelings with others.

Just for today: I will accept my feelings, whatever they may be, just as they are. I will practice the program and learn to live with my feelings.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The shy man usually finds that he has been shy without cause, and that, in practice, no one takes the slightest notice of him. --Robert Lynd
We sometimes feel self-conscious in front of others. It may be that we've just gotten braces or a new haircut and we're afraid everyone will stare at us. We stop smiling and talk with our heads bowed. Many people have worn braces and many more will. We need not be ashamed just because we feel different. By beginning to smile again we will see how many people really didn't notice our braces, or our haircuts, or anything but what they see inside us.
All we need to do is lift our heads and smile. We will be amazed to find how little even our best friends notice about the externals, the things that don't really matter. Who we are is far more noticeable and far more important than what we look like. A smile at shy times helps us accept ourselves as others do.
What makes me shy?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Self-importance is our greatest enemy. Think about it - what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellowmen. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone. --Carlos Castaneda
Were we offended by someone today? Do we harbor resentment for remarks, oversights, or unpleasant mannerisms? Do we feel tense or uneasy about how someone else has treated us? We can probably make a good case to justify our reactions. Perhaps we are in the right and they are in the wrong.
Yet, even if we are justified, it doesn't matter. We may be puffing ourselves up and wasting energy. When we are oversensitive, we take a self-righteous position, which leads us far from our path of spiritual awakening. Our strength is diminished.
How much better it is to let go of the lightness, let go of our grandiosity, and accept the imperfections in others. We need to accept our own imperfections too. When we do, we are better men, and our strength and energy can be focused on richer goals.
I will accept others' imperfections; I do not need to be right.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Enjoying Recovery
What a journey!
This process of growth and change takes us along an ever-changing road. Sometimes the way is hard and craggy. Sometimes we climb mountains. Sometimes we slide down the other side on a toboggan.
Sometimes we rest.
Sometimes we grope through the darkness. Sometimes we're blinded by sunlight.
At times many may walk with us on the road; sometimes we feel nearly alone.
Ever changing, always interesting, always leading someplace better, someplace good.
What a journey!
Today, God, help me relax and enjoy the scenery. Help me know I'm right where I need to be on my journey.


Today I look within to see what is keeping me stuck. I know I cannot change unless I know what there is to change. I feel energized and empowered to move forward. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

See How Powerful You Are

People who believe they’re victims get to be right. Each experience they have convinces them of that. They don’t open themselves to the lessons, the growth, and the beauty of each situation they encounter. All they can see is their victimization.

Many of us have done the hard work to shift our belief system about being a victim. As we did that, we noticed that the scenery in our lives changed. When we believe something different, we get to see something different.

People who believe they have powers get to be right,too. Although we know there is much in life we can’t control, we also know we have the power to think, to feel, to choose, and to take responsibility for ourselves and our lives. We’re discovering our creative powers, and our powers to love, including our power to love ourselves. We’ve embraced our powers to grow, to change, to move forward. We know we have the power to claim our lives and take responsibility for ourselves in any situation life brings. Although life may deal us certain hard blows, we’ve learned to see beyond that. We see life’s beauty, gifts, and lessons, and its mysterious and sometimes magical nature.

On the road to freedom we may have made a stopover. We believed we were victims and we got to be right. Now, our journey has led us someplace else. We know we have powers, we know we have choices. And we no longer need to be right. Just free.

See how powerful you are!

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Don’t let fear throw you off balance

Lay a two-by-four on the ground and walk its length without falling off. Easy, isn’t it? Now place a couple of bricks under the two-by-four, raising it off the ground by a few inches. Walk it again. A little harder this time? Now imagine that same two-by-four suspended at the height of your house with no safety net under it. Would you care to try again?

The higher the stakes, the harder it is to maintain our balance. That’s what fear does in our lives.

When we’re faced with simple situations in life, it’s easy to do the right thing. But as the stakes get higher and higher, it becomes increasingly difficult to focus on the task. We imagine “what is” and what might happen if we fail.

Look at the two-by-fours that you have to cross every day in your life. Are you allowing fear of a worst-case scenario to upset your balance? Put the situation back on the ground. Rarely will failure result in permanent damage. Remove the fear that your mind has created around the possibility of failure and just walk along the plank.

God, help me do the tasks that I have to without the balance-upsetting confusion brought by fear. Help me do what is right simply and easily each day.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Rare is the recovering alcoholic who will now dispute the fact that denial is a primary symptom of the illness. The Program teaches us that alcoholism is the only illness which actually tells the afflicted person that he or she really isn’t sick at all. Not surprisingly, then, our lives as practicing alcoholics were characterized by endless rationalization, countless alibis and in short, a steadfast unwillingness to accept the fact that we were, without question, bodily and mentally different from our fellows. Have I conceded to my innermost self that I am truly powerless over alcohol?

Today I Pray

May The Program’s First Step be not half-hearted for me, but a total admission of powerlessness over my addiction. May I rid myself of that first symptom — denial — which refuses to recognize any other symptom of my disease.

Today I Will Remember

Deny denial.

****************************************

One More Day

A simple grateful thought raised to heaven is the most perfect prayer.
– Gotthold Ephraim Lessing

Can we picture ourselves as small children, bouncing back out of bed to add just one more, “and also bless my teddy bear, and my . . . “? Most of us prayed because that’s what we were taught to do. We didn’t understand many of the reasons, but it felt good and made us feel safe too.

We form new habits as grown-ups. Perhaps prayer isn’t part of our day anymore. We may start to pray only when we need to ask for something. It is within our reach to develop the habit of prayer once again. There may be comfort in the habit of giving thanks every day … for what good health we do enjoy … for the beauty of nature … for our family and friends.

I will use prayer as one of the ways I can express myself and live a fulfilling life.

************************************

Food For Thought

Don't Relax!

It requires extra effort to maintain abstinence during a particularly difficult time when we are especially tempted. Entertaining guests, visiting family, coping with a crisis - there are some times when it seems to take every ounce of strength we have to stay abstinent.

When the crisis has passed, we breathe a sigh of relief and are grateful that life is back to normal. This, for many of us, is the danger point. Having made it through the difficult situation, we may feel that we are now safe and can let down our guard. We may even feel that we deserve a reward for having said no to temptation.

Let's remember that the best reward is continued abstinence. There is no time when we are safe from compulsive overeating. We are always one bite away from a binge. We may never relax vigilance over our thoughts and actions.

When we are weary, let's remember that the strength we need comes not from ourselves but from our Higher Power. Let's recharge our batteries with prayer, meditation, and contact with other OA members.

Sustain me, Lord, when I am tempted to give up.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ Laughter ~

Laughter can be more satisfying than honor;
more precious than money;
more heart-cleansing than prayer.
Harriet Rochlin

For as long as I can remember I've always been a serious person. I can't remember ever doing something just for fun or to have a laugh. There always had to be a purpose for what I did in my life, or else it was of no value. As for being able to laugh at myself, that wasn't even in my frame of reference. I was so super-sensitive that I'd get upset if someone made fun of me, as it would always make me feel "less than" or stupid.

So when I came into the doors of my first Twelve Step meeting, I was amazed that, even though all the people I met had problems around food, they were still able to look at their mistakes and realize that that didn't make them a bad person. But even more heartwarming was the fact that I heard laughter in those rooms. Before, I'd always thought that when someone laughed at what I said, they were laughing at me, and that would reinforce my feelings of inadequacy.

The lessons I'm learning here are not easy ones and there are still times when my old behaviors of being overly sensitive creep in, but I know that recovery is a process, and as I grow in the program, it will get better.

One day at a time ...
As I practice the program and work the steps, I am becoming more able to laugh at myself and not always look at the dark side of life. What a gift it has been to start enjoying life!
~ Sharon ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

AFTER ALL, OUR PROBLEMS WERE OF OUR OWN MAKING. BOTTLES WERE ONLY A SYMBOL. BESIDES, WE HAVE STOPPED FIGHTING ANYBODY OR ANYTHING. WE HAVE TO! - Pg. 103 - Working With Others

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Your whole life has turned upside down and it's time for a good cry. Have a good cry, wash out your heart. If you keep it inside it'll tear you apart.' - Dr. Hook

I follow my own inner path for serenity. When it's time to cry, my spirit lets me know and I allow tears.

It's the Little Things

It's the little things that count, that add up to make a life, that weave themselves into the fabric of my day and make it feel whole. My morning routines, the activities of my day the people I encounter and share my time with. Little things like a pleasant walk, exercise, my daily errands and even eating my favorite foods all come together to make my day. As I move through my day today, I will take time to notice and be grateful for whatever gives me pleasure. I will say a quiet thank you for all that life is handing me.

I have an Attitude of Gratitude

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

We find that the difference between adventure and disaster usually boils down to attitude. It's like the glass half full or half empty. Is it a problem or an opportunity; an obstruction or a challenge for growth? The way you choose to see it makes all the difference.

I don't see thing as they are, I see things as I am.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

You have to ask yourself, What would an adult do in this situation?

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I look within to see what is keeping me stuck. I know I cannot change unless I know what there is to change. I feel energized and empowered to move forward.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

You hear people say; 'I do Steps 1,2,and 3 everyday.' And that sounds so good the newcomer hears that and dies. Because all they've told you is they're getting ready to begin. It's like they make a decision to be pilots and them spend the rest of their lives in ground school. - Ted H.

[bluidkiti]

February 5

Daily Reflections

A GLORIOUS RELEASE

"The minute I stopped arguing, I could begin to see
and feel. Right there, Step Two gently and very
gradually began to infiltrate my life. I can't say
upon what occasion or upon what day I came to believe
in a Power greater than myself, but I certainly have
that belief now. To acquire it, I had to stop fighting
and practice the rest of A.A.'s program as
enthusiastically as I could."
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p.27

After years of indulging in a "self-will run riot,"
Step Two became for me a glorious release from being
all alone. Nothing is so painful or insurmountable
in my journey now. Someone is always there to share
life's burdens with me. Step Two became a reinforcement
with God, and I now realize that my insanity and ego
were curiously linked. To rid myself of the former, I
must give up the latter to One with far broader
shoulders than my own.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

One thing we learn in A.A. is to take a long view of
drinking instead of a short view. When we were drinking
we thought more about the pleasure or release that a
drink would give us, than we did about the consequences
which would result from our taking that drink. Liquor
looks good from the short view. When we look in a package
store window, we see liquor dressed up in its best
wrappings, with fancy labels and decorations. They look
swell. But have I learned that what's inside those
beautiful bottles is just plain poison to me?

Meditation For The Day

I believe that life is a school in which I must learn
spiritual things. I must trust in God and He will teach
me. I must listen to God and He will speak through my
mind. I must commune with Him in spite of all opposition
and every obstacle. There will be days when I will hear no
voice in my mind and when there will come no intimate
heart to heart communion. But if I persist, and make a life
habit of schooling myself in spiritual things, God will reveal
Himself to me in many ways.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may regularly go to school in things of the
spirit. I pray that I may grow spiritually by making a
practice of these things.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Humility First, p. 36

We found many in A.A. who once thought, as we did, that humility was
another name for weakness. They helped us to get down to right size.
By their example they showed us that humility and intellect could be
compatible, provided we placed humility first. When we began to do
that, we received the gift of faith, a faith which works. This faith is
for you, too.

<< << << >> >> >>

Where humility formerly stood for a forced feeding on humble pie, it
now begins to mean the nourishing ingredient that can give us serenity.

12 & 12
1. p. 30
2. p. 74

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Is it really honesty?
Honesty
No matter how cruel the results, the need to criticize others can be a compulsion. Such criticism is sometimes justified by the defense "Well, I had to be honest" or "it was only the truth."
But is it really honesty to gratuitously bring our a hurtful truth? Not when the critic's real motives are to wound and humiliate someone, not to foster self-improvement and better behavior. Under those circumstances, the critic is really the dishonest person…. For not having detected the ugly personal motives that triggered the criticism.
Honesty is closely related to humility, and the truly honest person is usually humbly aware of person shortcomings in his or her own life. This alone makes the honest person reluctant to criticize and always careful to do it in ways that avoid inflicting pain or hurt.
Real honesty is rare, especially in people who hurt others under the guise of honesty.
With God's help, I'll look carefully at my motives today.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Don't bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it.------Thomas Jefferson
Pleasure is important in recovery. But at times we think pleasure is the answer to life's pains. Alcohol and other drugs were what we liked best. We need to watch out so we don't switch to another addiction--such as gambling, food, sex, or work. The real answer to life's pains is in having a strong spiritual center. It is also our best way to avoid another addiction. Recovery lets us turn our pain over to the care of our Higher Power. Our Higher Power can handle any problem we may have. Our program can help us with our problems too. Recovery is a three-way deal. Higher Power, program, and us.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me avoid another addiction. When I have problems, have me come to You and to my program before anything else.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll set aside time and ask the question, "Am I headed for another addiction/" I'll also ask my sponsor what he or she thinks.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got. --Janis Joplin
When we don't know who we are, it's easy to compromise ourselves. When we don't know where we stand on an issue, it's easy to be swayed by a forceful voice. Values may be cloudy in our minds, or we may not be aware of them at all. It's then that we are vulnerable to the persuasion of another. In this Twelve Step program, we are offered the way to know ourselves. We are supported in our efforts, and we realize we have friends who don't want us to compromise ourselves--who value our struggle to know and to be true to ourselves.
One of recovery's greatest gifts is discovering we can make decisions that represent us, our inner selves, and those decisions please us. We all are familiar with the tiny tug of shame that locates itself in our solar plexus. When we "go along," when we "give in" on a personally important issue, we pay a consequence. We lose a bit of ourselves. Over the years we've lost many bits. We have a choice, however.
I will have a chance, soon, to act according to my wishes. I will take it.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

We asked ourselves this: Are not some of us just as biased and unreasonable about the realm of the spirit as were the ancients about the realm of the material? Even in the present century, American newspapers were afraid to print an account of the Wright brothers’ first successful flight at Kitty Hawk. Had not all efforts at flight failed before? Did not Professor Langley’s flying machine go to the bottom of the Potomac River? Was it not true that the best mathematical minds had proved man could never fly? Had not people said God had reserved this privilege to the
birds? Only thirty years later the conquest of the air was almost an old story and airplane travel was in full swing.

pp. 51-52

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

I got to the place where I'd look forward to the weekend's drinking and pacify myself by saying that the weekends were mine, that it didn't interfere with my family or my business if I drank on the weekends. But the weekends stretched on into Mondays, and the time soon came when I drank every day. My practice at that juncture was just barely getting us a living.

p. 237

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition One - "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. Unity."

"Does this mean," some will anxiously ask, "that in A.A. the individual doesn't count for much? Is he to be dominated by his group and swallowed up in it?"
We may certainly answer this question with a loud "No!" We believe there isn't a fellowship on earth which lavishes more devoted care upon its individual members; surely there is none which more jealously guards the individual's right to think, talk, and act as he wishes. No A.A. can compel another to do anything; nobody can be punished or expelled. Our Twelve Steps to recovery are suggestions; the Twelve Traditions which guarantee A.A.'s unity contain not a single "Don't." They repeatedly say "We ought . . ." but never "You must!"

p. 129

************************************************** *********

I just sit down for a few minutes, do a little thinking, and God writes the songs for me. --Hank Williams (1923 - 1953)

Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. --Confucius

The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.

"You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should." --Max Ehrmann

"Settle for nothing less than what you truly desire, and do not be afraid to ask for what you feel will bring you joy and fulfillment." --Emmanuel

"Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him." --Aldous Huxley

"Our own rough edges become smooth as we help a friend smooth her edges." --Sue Atchley Ebaugh

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

MONEY

"Capital, as such, is not evil; it
is its wrong use that is evil."
-- Mohandas K. Gandhi

Today I am not afraid to say that I am concerned for my prosperity
--- not just in terms of health, friendship and employment but also
concerning money. For years I was concerned to have the best, buy
the best, own the best and not "shortchange" myself --- yet I felt
guilty in having such feelings. Today in my sobriety I truly believe
that I deserve the best. In this way I am loving myself. Money, prosperity
and capital are not "bad" in themselves; it is how we use them.

Today, as promised in my recovery, things are certainly getting
better and I am able to invest and buy wisely. Some years ago I would
squander money on my addiction. Today I am able to appreciate and
share my monetary benefits. Family, friends and the "needy" can
genuinely share my prosperity: the more I give away today, the more
I get.

Thank You for all the many benefits You have showered upon me in
my recovery, not least capital. May I always use it responsibly.

************************************************** *********

"I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh." Galatians 5:16

"Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you?" 1 Corinthians 3:16

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Philippians 4:4

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a good hope and a good future.'"
Jeremiah 29:11

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Today do what you can and expect no more of yourself. Lord, I will feel joy in my accomplishments today and gratitude for the things I have to do tomorrow.

Do not act as though you are watching a parade because we are each one of the marchers. Lord, things change so quickly. Help me to celebrate the constant newness of my life.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Keep Coming Back!

"We are grateful that we were made so welcome at meetings that we felt comfortable."
Basic Text p. 80

Remember how scared we were when we walked into our first NA meeting? Even if we walked in with a friend, most of us recall how difficult it was to attend that first meeting. What was it that kept us coming back? Most of us have grateful memories of the welcome we were given and how comfortable that made us feel. When we raised our hand as a newcomer, we opened the door for other members to approach us and welcome us.

Sometimes the difference between those addicts who walk back out the door of their first meeting, never to return to NA, and the addicts who stay to seek recovery is the simple hug of an NA member. When we have been clean awhile, it's easy to step back from the procession of newcomers—after all, we've seen so many people come and go. But members with some clean time can make the difference between the addict who doesn't return and the addict who keeps coming back. By offering our phone numbers, a hug, or just a warm welcome, we extend the hand of Narcotics Anonymous to the addict who still suffers.

Just for today: I remember the welcome I was given when I first came to NA. Today, I will express my gratitude by offering a hug to a newcomer.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Let there be spaces in your togetherness. --Kahlil Gibran
Sometimes it is just as important to know when to leave others alone as it is to know when to talk with them. We all need to be alone at times--to think, to work out a problem, or just to be quiet with ourselves. This is especially true in families, where we're often surrounded by others. If we tune in to our other family members, we can develop sensors that will let us know when they need some time alone. Part of good communication is knowing when not to talk, too.
Can I be sensitive to my family's needs for privacy today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The human animal needs a freedom seldom mentioned: freedom from intrusion. He needs a little privacy quite as much as he wants understanding or vitamins or exercise or praise. --Phyllis McGinley
The boundaries between us in our families and our friendships often need to be reshaped in recovery. We need to know our feelings are private. We reveal them at our choosing, with whom we choose. We give up on mind reading or probing because it intrudes upon another's privacy. We actively engage in our relationships by sharing ourselves and listening to each other.
A secret that makes a relationship dishonest is destructive and ought to be told. But we cannot force another person to be honest, or pry the truth from a loved one. We can only be honest ourselves and guard our own right to privacy. Intimacy is the bridge, which is built between two separate people. Only when we let others have their privacy and we take ours can our relationships be more intimate.
I will maintain the boundaries of my privacy today and respect the right of others to do the same.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Financial Responsibility
We are responsible for ourselves financially.
What a frightening, grown up thought that is for many of us - taking responsibility for money and our financial affairs. For many of us, handing over responsibility for our financial affairs has been part of a codependent trade off in our relationships.
Some of our emotional dependency on others, on this tight tie that binds us to others, not in love, but in need and desperation, is directly related to financial dependency. Our fears and reluctance to take responsibility for our financial affairs can be a barrier to the freedom we're seeking in recovery.
Financial responsibility is an attitude. Money goes out to pay for necessities and luxuries. Money must come in, in order to go out. How much needs to come in to equal that which is going out?
Taxes... savings plans...appropriate spending habits that demonstrate an attitude of financial responsibility.... Part of being alive means learning to handle money. Even if we have a healthy contract with someone that allows us to depend on him or her for money, we still need to understand how money works. We still need to adopt an attitude of financial responsibility for ourselves. Even if we have a contract with someone else to provide for our financial needs, we need to understand the workings of the money earned and spent in our life.
Self-esteem will increase when we increase our sense of being financially responsible for ourselves. We can start where we are, with what we have today.
God, help me become willing to let go of my fears and reluctance to face the necessary parts of handling money responsibly in my life. Shaw me the lessons I need to learn about money.


It feels terrific letting go of perfection as my goal. As I let go of my judgments, all parts of me come together and I feel complete. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Learn to Live with Unfinished Projects

Whether your project is sewing a dress, reading a book, writing a book, building a home, or learning a lesson on your journey, learn to live comfortably with unfinished work. Whatever you’re working on, whatever you’re in the midst of doesn’t need to be finished, in perfect order, with all the loose ends in place for you to be happy.

For too many years, we worried and fretted, denying ourselves happiness until we could see the whole picture, learn the entire lesson, cross every t and dot each i. That meant we spend a lot of stressful time waiting for that one moment when the project was complete.

Enjoy all the stages of the process you’re in. The first moments when the germ of the idea finds you. The time before you begin, when the seed lies dormant in the ground, getting ready to grow. The beginning, and all the days throughout the middle. Those bleak days, when it looks like you’re stuck and won’t break through. Those exciting days when the project, the lesson, the life you’re building takes shape and form.

Be happy now. Enjoy the creative process– the process of creating your life, yourself, and the project you’re working on–today. Don’t wait for those finishing moments to take pleasure in your work and your life. Find joy all along the way.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Stare in the face of your fears

Examine your fears.

Sometimes we’re afraid of specific things. Sometimes we fear the unknown. And sometimes we’re just afraid, because that’s the way we usually feel.

Are you nervous, anxious,upset? What’s scaring you right now?

Have a little talk with yourself. Take a look at what you fear. Are you starting a new relationship or job? What are the risks? What’s the worse that could possibly happen? Sometimes it helps to go through our fears, one by one. We don’t need to dwell on the negative, but we need to be certain that we’re willing to take responsibility for the risks involved.

Then look in the other direction, and see the entire positive potential there. What can you gain by taking that risk? Does the thrill of victory outweigh the potential loss?

We may emerge from the list saying, No, I choose not to risk that. Or, we may look at the risks and say, Yes, I’ve been through worse. I can handle this,too.

Someone once told me many years ago that fear was a good thing. “If you’re not feeling afraid, it means you’re not doing anything differently. You’re just repeating the same old thing.” If fear is haunting you, stare it in the face. See what’s making you feel afraid. Then either back off, or stare that fear down.

God, help me sort through my fears,one by one. Then guide me in deciding which risks I want to take. Help me not be foolhardy. But help me let go of timidity,too.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

If I am troubled, worried, exasperated or frustrated, do I tend to rationalize the situation and lay the blame on someone else? When I am in such a state, is my conversation punctuated with, :Hey did..,” “She said..,” “They did..”? Or can I honestly admit that perhaps I’m at fault. My peace of mind depends on overcoming toward rationalization. Will I try, day by day, to be rigorously honest with myself?

Today I Pray

May I catch myself as I talk in the third person, “He did…” or “They promised…” or “She said shoe would…” and listen for the blaming that has become such a pattern for me and preserves delusion. May I do a turnabout and face myself instead.

Today I Will Remember

Honesty is the only policy.

****************************************

One More Day

We have seen better days.
– Shakespeare

It is quit difficult to define some of the components that help create what we interpret as a good day. A general sense of well-being prevails, and we have a tendency to look at the world through rose-colored glasses. Everything seems to go just right.

It is not the least bit hard, however, to define a bad day. Nothing happens according to plan. We feel out of sorts, not particularly well. With the advent of health changes, we can inadvertently allow many days to become bad ones.

The only way we can stop having negative experiences is to change our expectations of what constitutes a good day. We don’t have to lower our expectations, just make them more realistic for the situation at hand. We will then find that most of our days can be good ones.

My life is and will always be a mixture of good and bad days. I can influence my interactions and thereby influence the color of my days.

************************************

Food For Thought

Slumps

Most of us go through periods in our lives when nothing seems interesting, when our motivation and enthusiasm have deserted us. We feel dull and bored and depressed. Whether the slump lasts for an afternoon or for a month or for a year, the compulsive overeater tends to turn to food as a way out. For us, food has been exciting, and eating often used to be the most pleasurable activity we could imagine.

As most of us know all too well, eating is not a permanent solution to boredom. We may get a temporary high from food, but we invariably eat too much and end up feeling infinitely worse than before we started. Boredom is better than a binge. Food does not motivate nor does it generate enthusiasm. Overeating has just the opposite effect.

Joining OA does not ensure that we will never again experience boredom or have the blahs. What it does provide is a program of action to which we may turn when we are in a slump. Going to meetings, making phone calls, reading the literature, working the Steps - these are concrete actions we can take.

We have tried food and found that it eventually made things worse. Now let's try the OA program.

Give me grace to act.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ SELF WORTH ~

Your worth is not established by teaching or learning.
Your worth is established by God.
Nothing you do or think or wish or make
is necessary to establish your worth.
Helen Schucman, scribe of "A Course in Miracles"

I have spent the last 30 years of my life wanting more, thinking that in proving myself I would be worthy of the love and affection I deserved and this would determine my value. I was always seeking the best path to take to show everyone what I could do and that I was worthy of more of their love and praises.

Turning my life and my will over to God has allowed me to see that, no matter what I may think, in God's eyes I am worth plenty, and this has given me so much peace. I now know that what others say or think about me is not going to make me worthy or worthless. Allowing God to run the show and doing the next right thing is all I need to do. I don't have to concern myself if I am of value to anyone; I am of value to God, and that is all that counts.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will continue to turn to God for my strength, knowing that I need not carry the burden of proof of what I'm worth.
~ Maureen ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We must lose our fear of creditors no matter how far we have to go, for we are liable to drink if we are afraid to face them. - Pg. 78 - Into Action

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

We sometimes say things to ourselves like 'I should have done this, I should have done that.' We can 'should' ourselves into deep and scaring guilt over what we did in addiction. Regardless of the playlets running in our heads, we are not in a position to take over our Higher Power's position of overseeing life.

No matter how long I have been on earth or how intelligent and experienced I am, I will never rise above the level of human being.

The Creative Power of My Thoughts

Today, I recognize that I tend to produce in my life what I feel is true for myself. Thoughts have a creative power of their own. If I look closely, I can see my thoughts come to life. I create the possibility of what I would like by first experiencing it in my mind. I will visualize what I would like to have in my life in my mind's eye. I will accept what I see in my inner eye as being available for me, and I will fully participate in my vision as if it were already mine. I will be specific about what I see in my mind's creative eye and I will accept my inner vision as fully possible. I will see it, sense, taste it and see it as already happening. What I believe can be true for me, can be true for me. I block things form happening with my own doubt and disbelief. Today, I will imagine that I can live the life I am able to hold as a steady vision. If I can see it, I can move toward it, I can accept it, I can crate it.

All good things are possible for me

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Practicing the principles can never be done from a pedestal of self-righteousness. The very act of judging, complaining or criticizing, demonstrates that we are spiritually out of whack--not the ones we judge. Oh, they may be out of whack too, but that's not our side of the street, is it?

My program does not work in principle. It only works in practice.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Addiction is not a sentence; it is only a word.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I dare to walk on a new path where comfort and security are not my goals. I dare to reach out to my fellow human beings and become part of society whose aim is peace and love and joy and recovery.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Most alcoholics would rather die than get sober.
And they do. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

February 6

Daily Reflections

A RALLYING POINT

Therefore, Step Two is the rallying point for all of us. "Whether agnostic, atheist, or
former believer, we can stand together on this Step.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 33

I feel that A.A. is a God-inspired program and that God is at every A.A. meeting. I see,
believe, and have come to know that A.A. works, because I have stayed sober today. I
am turning my life over to A.A. and to God by going to an A.A. meeting. If God is in my
heart and He speaks to me through other people, then I must be a channel of God to
other people. I should seek to do His will by living spiritual principles and my reward will
be sanity and emotional sobriety.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

On a dark night, the bright lights of the corner tavern look mighty inviting. Inside, there
seems to be warmth and good cheer. But we don't stop to think that if we go in there we'll
probably end up drunk, with our money spent and an awful hangover. A long
mahogany bar in the tropical moonlight looks like a very gay place. But you should see
the place the next morning. The chairs are piled on the tables and the place stinks of stale
beer and cigarette stubs. And often we are there too, trying to cure the shakes by gulping
down straight whiskey. Can I look straight through the night before and see the morning
after?

Meditation For The Day

God finds, amid the crowd, a few people who follow Him, just to be near Him, just to dwell
in His presence. A longing in the Eternal Heart may be satisfied by these few people. I
will let God know that I seek just to dwell in His presence, to be near Him, not so much
for teaching or a message, as just for Him. It may be that the longing of the human
heart to be loved for itself is something caught from the Great Divine Heart.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may have a listening ear, so that God may speak to me. I pray that I may
have a waiting heart, so that God may come to me.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

A Full and Thankful Heart, p. 37

One exercise that I practice is to try for a full inventory of my blessings
and then for a right acceptance of the many gifts that are mine--both
temporal and spiritual. Here I try to achieve a state of joyful gratitude.
When such a brand of gratitude is repeatedly affirmed and pondered, it
can finally displace the natural tendency to congratulate myself on
whatever progress I may have been enabled to make in some areas of
living.

I try hard to hold fast to the truth that a full and thankful heart cannot
entertain great conceits. When brimming with gratitude, one's
heartbeat must surely result in outgoing love, the finest emotion that we
can never know.

Grapevine, March 1962

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Competing with Others
A new View of Competition.
We live in a world torn by endless strife and competition. Although competitiveness can be a good quality, we've seen it become very ugly and destructive. A few alcoholics like the excitement of competition, but many of us withdraw from it. We hate anything that includes the risk of defeat or might make us appear second best. Sometimes we even feel guilty in winning.
We don't need the kind of competition that causes us to gloat arrogantly in victory or to wallow in self-pity in defeat. We don't really need to compete with others in anything if we are truly seeking guidance from our Higher power. If God is in charge of our lives, we do not have to struggle with others for the good we seek in life. It is God's pleasure to give us the good things of the kingdom.
There is a kind of competition that does pay off in sobriety…… competition with ourselves. We can try to be better people than we might have been yesterday, or a week ago, or a month ago. This kind of competition requires skill and stamina, and it also requires exercise and training. But anybody who sincerely seeks a spiritual life and true self-improvement can find it in AA.
This day, I won't try to reform or change anybody but myself. I'll remember that God is in charge of things and concentrate on competing with the person I once was by letting the program work in my life.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

We will not know unless we begin.-------Howard Zinn
Let us begin! Whether it be working on our First Step, Finding a sponsor, or talking to someone we hurt---Let us begin. Doubt will set in if we wait too long. Fear will follow. So, let us begin. We learn by doing. Recovery is for doers. Sobriety doesn't just happen. We create it. We create it by working the Steps and learning from them. We'll never totally understand the Steps unless we work them. In the same way, we'll never learn how to have friends unless we try. So, call your friends, instead of waiting to be called. Begin and begin again. Each day is a new beginning.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, today I'll begin. I begin by asking for Your help and love. Be with me as I go through my day. Help me work for progress, not perfection.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll not sit on the sidelines. I'll be a doer. I'll decide what to do to move closer to friends, family, Higher Power, and myself.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

I believe that a sign of maturity is accepting deferred gratification. --Peggy Cahn
It's okay to want to feel good all the time. Happiness is something we all deserve. However, there are often preparatory steps we need to take, a number of which will not bring joy, before we arrive at a place of sustained happiness.
The level of our pain at any particular moment has prompted us to seek short-term highs. And with each attempt at a quick "fix," we will be reminded that, just as with our many former attempts, the high is very short-term.
Long-term happiness is not the byproduct of short-term gratification. We don't have to earn happiness, exactly, but we do have to discover where it's found. How fortunate we are to have the program guiding our search. We will find happiness when we learn to get quiet and listen to our inner selves. We will find happiness when we focus less on our personal problems and more on the needs of others.
Many of us will need to redefine what happiness is. Understanding our value and necessity to our circle of acquaintances will bring us happiness, a happiness that will sustain us, and so will gratitude for our friends, our growing health, our abstinence also sustain us. Sincerely touching the soul of someone else can tap the well of happiness within each of us.
I will find happiness. Searching within myself, I will patiently, trustingly share myself with others.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

But in most fields our generation has witnessed complete liberation in thinking. Show any longshoreman a Sunday supplement describing a proposal to explore the moon by means of a rocket and he will say, “I bet they do it—maybe not so long either.” Is not our age characterized by the ease with which we discard old ideas for new, by the complete readiness with which we throw away the theory or gadget which does not work for something new which does?

p. 52

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

A peculiar thing happened in 1940. That year, on a Friday night, a man whom I had known for years come to my office. My father had treated him many years prior to this. This man's wife had been suffering for a couple of months, and when he came in he owed me a little bill. I filled a prescription for him. The following day, Saturday, he came back and said, "Jim, I owe you for the prescription last night. I didn't pay you." I thought, "I know you didn't pay me, because you didn't get a prescription." He said, "Yes. You know the prescription that you gave me for my wife last night." Fear gripped me then, because I could remember nothing about it. It was the first blackout I had to recognize as a blackout. The next morning I carried another prescription to this man's house and exchanged it for the bottle his wife had. Then I said to my wife, "Something has to be done." I took that bottle of medicine and gave it to a very good friend of mine who was a pharmacist and had it analyzed, and the bottle was perfectly all right. But I knew at that point that I couldn't stop, and I knew that I was a danger to myself and to others.

pp. 237-238

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition One - "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. Unity."

To many minds all this liberty for the individual spells sheer anarchy. Every newcomer, every friend who looks at A.A. for the first time is greatly puzzled. They see liberty verging on license, yet they recognize at once that A.A. has an irresistible strength of purpose and action. "How," they ask, "can such a crowd of anarchists function at all? How can they possible place their common welfare first? What in Heaven's name holds them together?"

pp. 129-130

************************************************** *********

We can teach the faith by the way we face what each day brings. --Damaris Hernandez

"Courage is fear that has said its prayers." --One Day at a Time in Al-Anon

"I said to a man who stood at the gate of the year: Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown." And he replied, "Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the hand of God. That shall be to you better than a light and safer than a known way." --Minnie L. Haskins

The greatest gift you receive from loving someone is Loving Someone.

If you judge people, you have no time to love them. --Mother Teresa

The solution is simple. The solution is spiritual.

S T E P S = Solutions To Every Problem in Sobriety.

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

LIES

"Christ cannot possibly have been
a Jew. I don't have to prove that
scientifically. It is a fact!"
-- Joseph Goebbels

Today I know that if a lie is said loudly enough, often enough, with ceremony and ritual,
people will believe it. I can identify with the above statement: I said I was not alcoholic
because I did not drink every day, in the mornings, all day and I was too young! People
believed me. Some people still choose to believe this lie.

Spirituality requires that I not only confront the lies in other people but also in myself.
Usually if I am angry at the remarks of others, it is because they remind me of myself.
Today I seek not simply to condemn but to understand.

May I continue to learn from the criticism I make of others.

************************************************** *********

One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple. For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle and set me high upon a rock. Psalm 27:4-5

"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples." John 15:5-8

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

It is better to try and fail than to fail because you are afraid to try. Lord, grant me the courage to live my life to the fullest.

Learn to be peaceful in all situations and trust that through all stages of our lives, God has a plan. Lord, may I have the wisdom to be able to turn my stumbling blocks into building blocks.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

I Can't - We Can

"We had convinced ourselves that we could make it alone and proceeded to live life on that basis. The results were disastrous and, in the end, each of us had to admit that self-sufficiency was a lie"

Basic Text p. 59

"I can't, but we can." This simple but profound truth applies initially to our first need as NA members: Together, we can stay clean, but when we isolate ourselves, we're in bad company. To recover, we need the support of other addicts.

Self-sufficiency impedes more than just our ability to stay clean. With or without drugs, living on self-will inevitably leads to disaster. We depend on other people for everything from goods and services to love and companionship, yet self-will puts us in constant conflict with those very people. To live a fulfilling life, we need harmony with others.

Other addicts and others in our communities are not the only ones we depend on. Power is not a human attribute, yet we need power to live. We find it in a Power greater than ourselves which provides the guidance and strength we lack on our own. When we pretend to be self-sufficient, we isolate ourselves from the one source of power sufficient to effectively guide us through life: our Higher Power.

Self-sufficiency doesn't work. We need other addicts; we need other people; and, to live fully, we need a Power greater than our own.

Just for today: I will seek the support of other recovering addicts, harmony with others in my community, and the care of my Higher Power. I can't, but we can.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Pride works from within; it is the direct appreciation of oneself.
--Arthur Schopenhauer
Pride, like all emotions, has two faces: one healthy and one sick. It is our challenge to use the healthy side well. Sick pride fills us with ourselves, looks down on others, and has no room for generosity. Healthy pride is heavy with humility. If we can feel joyful when we succeed, and tell others about it honestly, we are not being boastful.
Sick pride often keeps us from doing things because we are too proud to ask for help when we need it, or too proud to risk failure, or too proud to do anything that might not turn out perfect.
Healthy pride about our greatest victories always comes with the awareness that we did not do it all by ourselves. We had the aid, advice, and encouragement of loved ones. In all things that really count, we never walk alone. Even those who claim pride is not a virtue admit that it is the parent of many virtues.
What makes me proud of myself today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Behind an able man there are always other able men. --Chinese proverb
Most of us have had a strong desire in our lives to "do it ourselves." We have had the idea that strength and independence meant we should not rely on or receive help from others. Now, in recovery, we are learning a far more mature and time-honored principle. We find strength to develop to our fullest as members of a community. Maybe we never learned how to ask for help. Perhaps we haven't learned yet how to accept it. It may still be difficult to express our gratitude for the help that brought us where we are today.
In recovery, we get many lessons about these things. If we are actively growing, we will get help from others and give it too. The rewards of recovery give us ample reasons and opportunities to express our gratitude. We are no longer loners. Now we have a network of friends who truly enjoy and enhance each other's strength.
Today, I pray for help in learning how to share my strength and to appreciate the strength of others.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Stopping Victimization
Before recovery, many of us lacked a frame of reference with which to name the victimization and abuse in our life. We may have thought it was normal that people mistreated us. We may have believed we deserved mistreatment; we may have been attracted to people who mistreated us.
We need to let go, on a deep level, of our need to be victimized and to be victims. We need to let go of our need to be in dysfunctional relationships and systems at work, in love, in family relationships, in friendships. We deserve better. We deserve much better. It is our right. When we believe in our right to happiness, we will have happiness.
We will fight for that right, and the fight will emerge from our souls. Break free from oppression and victimization.
Today, I will liberate myself by letting go of my need to be a victim, and I'll explore my freedom to take care of myself. That liberation will not take me further away from people I love. It will bring me closer to people and. more in harmony with God's plan for my life.


I am slowly finding new strength within me as I begin to trust my inner voice. I dare listen and take new risks as I follow my inner path. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Look at What’s Right

Take time to notice what’s right in ourselves, in others, and in the world around us. We may become so concerned with correcting ourselves we become habituated to seeing what’s wrong. Not just seeing it– constantly looking for it. The question itself– What’s wrong? — is enough to keep us on edge.

There are times to take stock, do an inventory. Times to learn and grow. But spirituality and joy do not stem from trudging around in the muck of what’s wrong with others, ourselves, and life. We do not have to seek out mistakes and errors, poking and picking at ourselves to continue our growth. Poking and picking hurts. Our lessons will be revealed to us, and they will present themselves naturally. Growth will occur.

Give yourself a break. Ask yourself what’s right, what’s good, what’s true, what’s beautiful. Sometimes the lesson isn’t in discovering what’s wrong. Sometimes the lesson is discovering that the world is all right– and so are you.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Revel in the void

In the original Language of Letting Go, I talked about the in between places in our lives. Those are the uncomfortable places along the journey where you’re not where you were but you’re not where you’re going yet,either. I talked about accepting that place, no matter how difficult it might be.

Let’s look at this place again. Only now, we’ll call it the void. Take another look at that moment when one door has closed behind you and you’re standing in that dark hallway, but no door opens up. Or you let go of whatever you’ve been grasping so tightly and stand there with an empty hand. Don’t say woohoo just when you begin something new. Feel the woohoo of this moment,too! Embrace the void. This wonderful in-between place holds the keys to all creation. In the biblical story of creation, God began with a clean slate like the one you may face now. It was the magic and mystery of the void that allowed all of this wonderful creation to be.

If you’re at an in-between place, don’t just accept it. Revel in it, embrace it, rejoice at your opportunity to sit in the birth-place of all that will come along your path. Relax into the void and allow creation to flow.

God, help me embrace the void and allow it to bring forth what it will, rather than trying to force something that really doesn’t fit.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

I used to be an expert at unrealistic self-appraisal. At certain times, I would look only at that part of my life which seemed good. Then I would magnify whatever real or imagined virtues I had attained. Next, I would pat myself on the back for the fantastic job I was doing in The Program. Naturally, this generated a craving for still more “accomplishments” and still greater approval. Wasn’t that the pattern of my days during active addiction? The difference now, though, is that I can use the best alibi known — the spiritual alibi. Do I sometimes rationalize willful actions and nonsensical behavior in the name of “spiritual objectives?”

Today I Pray

God help me to know if I still crave attention and approval to the point of inflating my own virtues and magnifying my accomplishments in The Program or anywhere. May I keep a realistic perspective ab out my good points, even as I learn to respect myself.

Today I Will Remember

Learn to control inflation.

****************************************

One More Day

Grow old along with me!
The best is yet to be.
– Robert Browning

We all have been to beautiful weddings. A young couple’s love is so obvious. They have so much to look forward to, so much living is still ahead.

We understand more and more that now is the best time of our lives. Whether we are having a cup of coffee with a friend or fishing on a quiet lake, these are the best times.

As we age and reach the later decades of our lives, we become aware, even more sharply, that surely these are the best times of our lives. We feel comfortable with ourselves and what we have, and with what we are still accomplishing. We don’t set unreasonable goals anymore. And we are lucky, too, for we can blend all our previous years of experience into our daily lives.

I am comforted by knowing that every stage of my life presents me with new opportunities.

************************************

Food For Thought

The Power of Love

Love is the best motivation. When we are plugged in to our Higher Power, we are plugged in to love. It flows through us like a current, energizing our sluggish hearts and minds.

As we work the Steps of this program, we are given increased ability to love. By turning over our lives and our wills, we become receptive to the love, which surrounds and sustains us. By taking inventory and being ready to have our character defects removed, we are able to get rid of old ways of thinking and acting which have been blocking out love.

We cannot produce love for others by ourselves, but we can receive it from our Higher Power. We can even receive love for people we don't particularly like.

Love gives energy for action and directs its course.

May I grow in Love.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ ERRORS AND ASSETS ~

We grow by our willingness to face and rectify errors
and convert them into assets.
The Big Book

I have had a paradigm shift in my life. This means that I have begun to see some of my most basic ideas about food and nourishment from a different angle. I never really thought these things through before this program nudged me to have a look at my life with rigorous honesty. Oh, I wanted to be thin, but I barely related that to my feelings about food.

I was on autopilot for years and now realize that my concept of food was reasoned out when I was still a child. I put that childish set of ideas in place and then just stopped thinking about it. That little child wanted the most she could get of everything there was. She wanted the most attention, the most love, the most toys . . . and the most food. And at that time it was exactly the right way to look at the world. When I was a child setting up the system that constantly demands more to calm or soothe or comfort or love, I turned to food because it is simple and I did not possess the skills to get my needs met in other ways. It was a victory really, because I coped, made it through to now. But, to stick with a plan set up by a little child reflects a lack of willingness to face a basic error in engaging the world and change my behavior.

Now I know that eating mass quantities of food isn't about love, or fun, or comfort. Now my adult mind knows that food is a fuel that, if chosen judiciously, helps my body to work efficiently and clears my mind for the task of being a responsible adult in a busy, troubled world. By shifting from "How much food do I get for me?" to "What must I eat today to be healthy?" I change my whole basis for choosing. I take an area of my life that has been a constant error and change it into an asset, one that nourishes me and helps me to do that next right thing.

One Day at a Time . . .
I am willing to face my flawed thinking about food and change the way I make food choices, meal by meal, so that food is an asset to me and not a liability.
~ Carol B. ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid this selfishness. We must, or it kills us! God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. - Pg. 62 - How It Works

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Sanskrit saying: 'God sleeps in the minerals, awakens in the plants, walks in the animals, and thinks in you.' There is no place or time that the Power you believe in is not existing. Your thoughts are the culmination of this Power and your recovery HP's manifestation.

Working the steps and practicing the principles is the same as manifesting God on earth.

I Say Thanks

Today I will say thank you. If someone does something for me, I will say thank you. If I feel good when I wake up I will say thank you. When I have food that gives me pleasure and nourishment, I will appreciate its flavor. If the world provides me with another day of what I need to keep going, I will say thank you for being alive, for my health, my family and my friends. As I show appreciation a curious thing happens, I get more of what I am saying thank you for. People want to be appreciated; saying thank you allows them to give with pleasure. Life wants to be appreciated; saying thank you allows life to give with pleasure.

I do not take things for granted

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. The truth is that your Spiritual Source doesn't deal with time, clocks, and calendars. Your Source put you in today because your Source is in today.

Because God (Allah, Krishna, Kahuna, Creator, Divine Intelligence) is in the NOW, then 'Just for Today' I stay here too.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Stay put and act in your own best interest.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I am slowly finding new strength within me as I begin to trust my inner voice. I dare listen and take new risks as I follow my inner path.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Rockbottom: When things got worse faster than I could lower my standards. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

February 7

Daily Reflections

A PATH TO FAITH

True humility and an open mind can lead us to faith, and every A.A. meeting is an
assurance that God will restore us to sanity if we rightly relate ourselves to Him.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 33

My last drunk had landed me in the hospital, totally broken. It was then that I was able
to see my past float in front of me. I realized that, through drinking, I had lived every
nightmare I had ever had. My own self-will and obsession to drink had driven me into a
dark pit of hallucinations, blackouts and despair. Finally beaten, I asked for God's help.
His presence told me to believe. My obsession for alcohol was taken away and my
paranoia has since been lifted. I am no longer afraid. I know my life is healthy and sane.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

A night club crowded with men and women all dressed up in evening clothes looks like a
very festive place. But you should see the rest rooms of that night club the next morning.
What a mess! People have been sick all over the place and does it smell! The glamour of
the night before is all gone and only the stink of the morning after is left. In A.A. we learn
to take a long view of drinking instead of a short view. We learn to think less about the
pleasure of the moment and more about the consequences. Has the night before become
less important to me and the morning after more important?

Meditation For The Day

Only a few more steps and then God's power shall be seen and known in my life. I am now
walking in darkness, surrounded by the limitations of space and time. But even in this
darkness, I can have faith and can be a light to guide feet that are afraid. I believe that
God's power will break through the darkness and my prayers will pierce even to the ears
of God Himself. But only a cry from the heart, a trusting cry, ever pierces that darkness
and reaches to the divine ear of God.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that the divine power of God will help my human weakness. I pray that my prayer
may reach through the darkness to the ear of God.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Let Go Absolutely, p.242

After failure on my part to dry up any drunks, Dr. Silkworth
reminded me of Professor William James's observation that truly
transforming spiritual experiences are nearly always founded on
calamity and collapse. "Stop preaching at them," Dr. Silkworth
said, "and give them the hard medical facts first. This may soften
them up at depth so that they will be willing to do anything to get
well. Then they may accept those spiritual ideas of yours, and
even a Higher Power."

********************************

We beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some
of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas, and the result was
nil--until we let go absolutely.

1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.13
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.58

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Responsibility for our actions.
Maturity
The practice of scape-goating goes way back to biblical times. It's easier to blame others for our problems than to take personal responsibility for facing and solving these problems.
In the AA program, however, there's nothing that serves as a basis for blaming others. In every way, AA insists that alcoholics take personal responsibility… not only for finding and maintaining sobriety, but also for past wrongs and personal shortcomings. This is a difficult change for alcoholics who have believed that others caused many of their problems.
But being forced to take responsibility for our actions is a blessing in disguise. It fairly shouts the good news that we can take charge of our lives despite what others think and do. With God's help, we can change ourselves into the people we ought to be. We are fortunate that life is arranged to give us this personal responsibility.. where would we be if our recovery depended only on others?
We also learn that this responsibility is not limited to our drinking. We are responsible for everything we think and do, and we have the power to make improvements in our lives beginning today.
I will go through the day without blaming others for my problems.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

I thank God for my handicaps, for through them, I have found myself, my work and my God.---Helen Keller.
None of us ever wanted to be addicts. It's not what we would choose to be--- just as no one would choose to blind and deaf. Helen Keller, who was blind and deaf, told of how her problems became her biggest gift. Through them, she found true meaning in her life. We can accept our handicap---our addiction--- and learn from it. The truth is, we're all handicapped in some way. Recovery is about facing our addiction and learning to live with it. When we see we can't do things alone, we see the need for a Higher Power.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see myself as I really am. Give me the serenity that comes from accepting my handicaps.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list all the ways I am handicapped. I'll ask myself, "What gift does each of these hold for me?"

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

However confused the scene of our life appears, however torn we may be who now do face that scene, it can be faced, and we can go on to be whole. --Muriel Rukeyser
We can expect to feel fear, even dread at some points in our lives. We will always have situations that, for a time at least, seem more than we can bear. But the clouds will lift. We are never given more than we can handle, and with each passing day we become more at ease with ourselves and all that life gives us. We are learning that "this too shall pass." Our confidence grows as our spiritual program gains strength.
Our ties to one another and our ties to the program make us whole. When we reflect on who we were and how far we've come, we will see that problems we drank over in days gone by are handled today and often with ease. The joy we share is that no problem is too great to be faced any longer. And no situation will ever have to be faced alone, unless we reject God's help.
I will be grateful for my growth toward wholeness and the opportunities I face today. They are bringing me into harmony with the Divine plan for my life.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

We had to ask ourselves why we shouldn’t apply to our human problems this same readiness to change our point of view. We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn’t control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn’t make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn’t seem to be of real help to other people—was not a basic solution of these bedevilments more important than whether we should see newsreels of lunar flight? Of course it was.

p. 52

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

I had a long talk with a psychiatrist, but nothing came of that, and I had also, just about that time, talked with a minister for whom I had a great deal of respect. He went into the religious side and told me that I didn't attend church as regularly as I should and that he felt, more or less, that this was responsible for my trouble. I rebelled against this, because just about the time that I was getting ready to leave high school, a revelation came to me about God, and it made things very complicated for me. The thought came to me that if God, as my mother said, was a vengeful God, he couldn't be a loving God. I wasn't able to comprehend it. I rebelled, and from that time on, I don't think I attended church more than a dozen times.

p. 238

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition One - "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. Unity."

Those who look closely soon have the key to this strange paradox. The A.A. member has to conform to the principles of recovery. His life actually depends upon obedience to spiritual principles. If he deviates too far, the penalty is sure and swift; he sickens and dies. At first he goes along because he must, but later he discovers a way of life he really wants to live. Moreover, he finds he cannot keep this priceless gift unless he gives it away. Neither he nor anybody else can survive unless he carries the A.A. message. The moment this Twelfth Step work forms a group, another discovery is made - that most individuals cannot recover unless there is a group. Realization dawns that he is but a small part of a great whole; that no personal sacrifice is too great for preservation of the Fellowship. He learns that the clamor of desires and ambitions within him must be silenced whenever these could damage the group. It becomes plain that the group must survive or the individual will not.

p. 130

************************************************** *********

God, the Master Artist, sees the whole picture and desires to make something delightful of us. --Gene L. Lankford

The joy is in the journey.

Life didn't end when I got sober -- it started.

Situations I fear are rarely as bad as the fear itself.

If faith without works is dead, then willingness without action is fantasy.

Resentment is like acid, eating away at the vessel it is stored in.

Walk softly and carry a Big Book.

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

CHILDLIKE

"In every child who is born, under
no matter what circumstances,
and of no matter what parents, the
potentiality of the human race is
born again."
-- James Agee

Today I am able to believe and see the God-given dignity of the human race in
the faces and lifestyles of others. In the challenge and rebelliousness of youth is
the hope for tomorrow.

Today I can associate myself with the need to question, risk and "be
outrageous". Today I can play, laugh at myself and own my craziness. Today I do
not need to be perfect.

When I used drugs, I was so judgmental, serious and controlling. Everything had
to have a place, or an answer, or be acceptable to others. My moments of guilt
were caused by my inability to please others.

Today I can be childlike and identify with the radical message for tomorrow: "to
thine own self be true!"

I see a child looking at the stars and I smile; I am that child.

************************************************** *********

O sing to the Lord a new song; sing to the Lord, all the earth. Sing to the Lord, bless his name; tell of his salvation from day to day. Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous works among all the peoples. For great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised; he is to be revered above all gods.
Psalm 96:1-4

I rejoice in the Lord greatly that now at last you have revived your concern for me; indeed, you were concerned for me, but had no opportunity to show it. Not that I am referring to being in need; for I have learned to be content with whatever I have. I know what it is to have little, and I know what it is to have plenty. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being well-fed and of going hungry, of having plenty and of being in need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me. Phillipians 4:10-13

"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Matthew 5:6

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

There is no moment like right now. Lord, help me start one thing today that I have been putting off.

Spend less time trying to change and more time making the best of who you are. Lord, help me daily to put Your words into action.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

This Is Not A Test

"We have found a loving, personal God to whom we can turn."
Basic Text p. 27

Some of us come into recovery with the impression that life's hardships are a series of cosmic tests designed to teach us something. This belief is readily apparent when something traumatic happens and we wail, "My Higher Power is testing me!" We're convinced that it's a test of our recovery when someone offers us drugs, or a test of our character when faced with a situation where we could do something unprincipled without getting caught. We may even think it's a test of our faith when we're in great pain over a tragedy in our lives.

But a loving Higher Power doesn't test our recovery, our character, or our faith. Life just happens, and sometimes it hurts. Many of us have lost love through no fault of our own. Some of us have lost all of our material wealth. A few of us have even grieved the loss of our own children. Life can be terribly painful at times, but the pain is not inflicted on us by our Higher Power. Rather, that Power is constantly by our sides, ready to carry us if we can't walk by ourselves. There is no harm that life can do us that the God of our understanding can't heal.

Just for today: I will have faith that my Higher Power's will for me is good, and that I am loved. I will seek my Higher Power's help in times of need.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
It is the weak who are cruel. Gentleness can only be expected from the strong. --Leo Rosten
When we think of strength, do we think of someone who shows no emotion and intimidates others with physical power? True strength is the freedom to show all kinds of feelings. Strong people aren't afraid of being vulnerable. A person who feels insecure may not feel free to show any kind of softness or be able to share gentle feelings. If we have true inner strength, we are not afraid to show what is a part of us, gentle feelings included.
It is wonderful to see a well-conditioned athlete cry tears of joy after a victory. In such an example we can see physical and emotional strength. In our lives together, we will be stronger if we do not try to hide our feelings out of fear. As our feelings flow, we will increase our self-understanding and build our true strength.
Am I strong enough to show how I really feel today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We cannot merely pray to You, 0 God, to end war;
For we know that You have made the world in a way
That man must find his own path to peace
Within himself and with his neighbor.
--Jack Riemer
Our conscious contact with God can be called prayer. There are many forms of prayer for a man in this program. For some of us it may take the form of talking to God; for others it may be silent meditation, observing nature, listening to music, or writing in a journal.
We have experienced the healing effect of this relationship. It has allowed us to move out of our willfulness. But we need to take action where we can make a difference. We cannot blame God for every bad thing that happens - or simply wait for God to provide all the good we want. Do we see the power we do have to influence our lives? Can we give up our resentments against God for bad things that have happened?
I am grateful for what God has given me and more aware of what I can do.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Owning Our Power
We need to make a distinction between powerlessness and owning our power.
The first step in recovery is accepting powerlessness. There are some things we can't do, no matter how long or hard we try. These things include changing other people, solving their problems, and controlling their behavior. Sometimes, we feel powerless over ourselves - what we feel or believe, or the effects of a particular situation or person on us.
It's important to surrender to powerlessness, but it's equally important to own our power. We aren't trapped. We aren't helpless. Sometimes it may feel like we are, but we aren't. We each have the God given power, and the right, to take care of ourselves in any circumstance, and with any person. The middle ground of self-care lies between the two extremes of controlling others and allowing them to control us. We can walk that ground gently or assertively, but in confidence that it is our right and responsibility.
Let the power come to walk that path.
Today, I will remember that I can take care of my self. I have choices, and. I can exercise the options I choose without guilt.


I feel my entire body unwinding and relaxing as I give up my resistance and struggle. Today I accept life as it comes and learn to flow with it with peace. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Experience Love for Yourself

To find love, you must first find it in yourself. Then the whole universe will mirror it back. See how people smile at you? Feel their tenderness, their affection, their respect. See how the whole world responds lovingly to you when you love yourself.

The world around you reflects how you feel about yourself. The beliefs of many years have kept you trapped in the illusion of separateness, apartness. Your hesitancy to love yourself was mirrored in the eys of others. But you are not alone, you are not estranged. You are not a disconnected part. You are part of the whole, intricately connected to all of life.

Go out, and embrace your connection. Embrace life. Watch the sunrise. Smell the cypress trees, a field of garlic, the gentle scent of an apple orchard. Feel the breeze on your cheek, the rain on your hair, the earth beneath your feet.

Stay open. Keep loving yourself. Know you are a vital part of a living universe. Watch how much better, how much kinder life is, as you grow in peace and harmony with yourself. See how much more love is mirrored in the universe since you committed to loving yourself.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Replace dread by saying woohoo

Let go of dread.

Treat it like a feeling. Identify it. Accept and acknowledge it. Then release it. Do whatever you have to, to get it out of your system. Because dread is more than just a feeling– it’s really a curse.

We throw this dark gray blanket of dread over our lives for hours, sometimes days, months, and sometimes years. We convince ourselves that certain situations will be terrible. Then what we’ve predicted comes true.

Dread is not living in the present moment. It’s living the future before we get there, and living it without any joy. There’s a lot of good about the future that you don’t know. There’s your power to flow. There’s the creative power that exists in the void. There’s your abillity to intuitively handle what comes up. And there’s a lesson, a pulsing potential in the experience that you can’t see yet. There may be a delightful consequence or outcome from this experience on which you haven’t planned. Or it may simply be something you need to get through to experience growth.

If you’re feeling cursed because you’re living in dread, take the curse off yourself.

God, help me open my heart to the full potential of every moment in my life.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

What do I do what I do? Why did I say what I said? Why on earth did I put off an important responsibility? Questions like these, best asked of myself in a quiet time of meditation, demand honest answers. I may have to think deeply for those answers, going beyond the tempting rationalizations that lack the luster of truth. Have I accepted the fact that self-deception can only damage me, providing a clouded and unrealistic picture of the person I really am?

Today I Pray

May God allow me to push aside my curtain of fibs, alibis, rationalizations, justification, distortions and downright lies and let in the light on the real truths about myself. May I meet the person I really am and take comfort in the person I can become.

Today I Will Remember

Hello, Me. Meet the Real Me.

****************************************

One More Day

Of all sad words of tongue or pen,
The saddest are these: It might have been.
– John Greenleaf Whittier

A story is told of a man leaning over his wife’s casket. “I waited too long,” he lamented to no one in particular. “Why didn’t I tell her how much I loved her, how much I cherished our life together? I waited too long.”

Like everyone else, we are guilty of procrastination. We tend to put off difficult decisions, such as ending a bad relationship or quitting a job or making aments with an old friend. Our Procrastinations seem to protect us.

Now we understand that time is important too. The more we put something off, the less time we have for other more positive areas of life. Life gets easier when we don’t procrastinate.

I can resolve many problems with direct actions. I need not procrastinate anymore.

************************************

Food For Thought

Abstinence Is Freedom

In the beginning, when we first practice abstinence, we may look at it as restriction, limitation, or denial. We don't like the word, we don't like giving up our favorite foods, we don't like measuring and weighing and writing down menus. We sometimes decide to abstain grudgingly, considering it punishment for past indulgences and bitter medicine for our disease.

Let's remember that what we are giving up is fat, lethargy, and the uncontrolled craving for more and more. Not to abstain is to remain a slave to compulsive overeating. Before OA, we were not free. We were prisoners of our compulsion.

Abstinence is not negative denial. It is positive freedom from the obsession with food and the debilitating effects of overeating. Through abstinence we become free to live active, interesting, satisfying lives. We are able to work and love and serve and enjoy in ways, which were unknown to us before.

When we choose to abstain, we choose freedom.

Thank you, Lord, for freedom.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ FELLOWSHIP ~

We may have all come on different ships,
but we're in the same boat now.
Martin Luther King Jr.

As a child I never had many friends and I was never one of the "in" crowd. I had many complexes and never thought I was good enough, or clever enough or thin enough. I didn't date much, nor did I often go to parties. Instead I lived in my perfect fantasy world, where I would one day be thin and beautiful and live happily ever after. As a result food became my best friend, and where friends would constantly disappoint me or leave me, food was always there to numb the pain of loneliness, rejection and loss. There was never anyone in whom I could confide the unbearable pain that I felt, and so I would bury myself in books and food, and thought that as long as I had enough food to soothe that great big hole in my soul, everything would be fine.

Finally, however, when the food was causing me more pain than the pain it was supposed to take away, in desperation I found the doors of this wonderful fellowship. The people in that first meeting were from all walks of life, and of all ages, with some being old enough to be my parents or young enough to be my children. Even though they initially appeared so different to me, I realized that in this motley group of people I had found the friends that I had always been looking for. The common bond we shared in our desire to stop eating compulsively and to heal our lives was the cement that keeps this wonderful fellowship going. These friends listened to me without judging me, they loved me even when I couldn't love myself, and they were there for me when I needed them. They have become my best friends and my family. It's a result of this fellowship with other compulsive overeaters, who share with me their experience, strength and hope, that I am constantly able to learn and grow.

One day at a time... One Day at a Time . . .
I will reach out in fellowship to my friends in the program, as they reach out to me, and in doing so I am empowered in ways that are truly miraculous.
~ Sharon S. ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

In face of collapse and despair, in the face of the total failure of their human resources, they found that a new power, peace, happiness, and sense of direction flowed into them. This happened soon after they wholeheartedly met a few simple requirements. - Pg. 50 - We Agnostics

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

You will feel powerless at times, yet once you live through your withdrawal and early confusing recovery, your resiliency to endure, survive, and thrive will amaze you. You are in a unique position to learn from this, turn around, and offer help to others. You are, at this very moment, learning skills that will help other addicts and alcoholics in the future. This is a gift.

I thank my Divine Source for the ability to view the good in the journey I now take.

Giving of Myself

I will not give things instead of love. I will recognize that the people who need and depend on me for that sustaining kind of love and attention will be hurt and confused if I ignore their real need for me. I need to give those who are close to me real love. They have cast their fate with mine and I owe them this. They depend on me and I need to understand that and step up to the plate and do what's necessary and right. I will also be appropriately grateful, when those I need and depend upon give me the caring and concern that nourishes my heart.

I give of my time and attention

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Some recovering addicts take comfort in their complexity as if they are the exceptionally wounded. They worry their wounds and pick at their pain, giving themselves permission to be difficult, slow, and self-absorbed. Are you simply healing to your own internal rhythm or giving yourself excuses to be difficult?

I don't make the pity pot too comfortable.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Align your actions so they are in agreement with the picture you paint of yourself at meetings.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I feel my entire body unwinding and relaxing as I give up my resistance and struggle. Today I accept life as it comes and learn to flow with it with peace.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Alcohol gave me wings to fly, then took away my sky. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

February 8

Daily Reflections

CONVINCING "MR. HYDE"

Even then, as we hew away, peace and joy will still elude us. That's
the place so many of us A.A. oldsters have come to. And it's a hell of a
spot, literally. How shall our unconscious--from which so many of our
fears, compulsions and phony aspirations still stream--be brought into
line with what we actually believe, know and want! How to convince
our dumb, raging and hidden "Mr. Hyde" becomes our main task.
THE BEST OF BILL, pp. 42-43

Regular attendance at meetings, service and helping others is the
recipe that many have tried and found to be successful. Whenever I
stray from these basic principles, my old habits resurface and my old
self also comes back with all its fears and defects. The ultimate goal of
each A.A. member is permanent sobriety, achieved One Day at a
Time.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

When the morning sun comes up on a nice bright day and we jump out
of bed, we're thankful to God that we feel well and happy instead of
sick and disgusted. Serenity and happiness have become much more
important to us than the excitement of drinking, which lifts us up for a
short while, but lets us way down in the end. Of course, all of us
alcoholics had a lot of fun with drinking. We might as well admit it. We
can look back on a lot of good times, before we became alcoholics. But
the time comes for all of us alcoholics when drinking ceases to be fun
and becomes trouble. Have I learned that drinking can never again be
anything but trouble for me?

Meditation For The Day

I must rely on God. I must trust Him to the limit. I must depend on
the Divine Power in all human relationships. I will wait and trust and hope,
until God shows me the way. I will wait for guidance on each
important decision. I will meet the test of waiting until a thing seems right
before I do it. Every work for God must meet this test of time. The
guidance will come, if I wait for it.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may meet the test of waiting for God's guidance. I pray
that I will not go off on my own.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Pipeline to God, p. 38

"I am a firm believer in both guidance and prayer. But I am fully aware,
and humble enough, I hope, to see there may be nothing infallible about
my guidance.

"The minute I figure I have got a perfectly clear pipeline to God, I have
become egotistical enough to get into real trouble. Nobody can cause
more needless grief than a power-driver who thinks he has got it straight
from God."

Letter, 1950

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Right attitudes Toward Anonymity.
Traditions.
At both the practical and spiritual levels, anonymity is a great blessing for the AA fellowship. There is much wisdom behind Traditions Eleven and Twelve.
Yet it is possible to use anonymity as a cloak for pride and fear. This might be the case with alcoholics who insist on concealing their AA membership from fellow workers, neighbors, and friends. They defend this zealous protection of their anonymity by pointing to the traditions. However, this could reveal a lack of understanding and perhaps a lack of commitment to the program.
Why is it useful to let others know we belong to AA? Our best opportunities to help others may come from people who watched us in sobriety and were inspired by our example.
However, we must maintain anonymity at the public media level, and nobody has the right to violate another person's anonymity. Nor is it wise to be critical of the AA member who prefers anonymity at every level. We have no right to pass judgment on such decisions. Above all, we never have a right to break another's anonymity.
I'll try to set a good example for others who may be seeking sobriety. I can find guidance about anonymity.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

You must find the ideas that have some promise in them...it's not enough to just have ideas. --George E. Woodberry
Each day we're flooded with ideas. Everyone seems to have found the truth, and now they want to share it. We may feel loaded down with all these ideas. Who and what do we believe? We've fallen on a set of ideas that hold great promise: The Twelve Steps. The ideas of the program have much promise because they're simple. They ask nothing that isn't good for us. They have been proven to work. Now we're people with more than ideas that work. We're people with good ideas that work. When we find ourselves wondering how to live, all we need to do is look to the Steps.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to put my energy into working the Steps.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list what is right about the Steps for me. What promises do the Steps hold for me?

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Reaction isn't action--that is, it isn't truly creative. --Elizabeth Janeway
We must learn how to act rather than react. Unfortunately, we've had lots of training at reacting. And we're all such good imitators. We are a society of reactors. We let the good or the bad behavior of another person determine our own behavior as a matter of course. But the opportunities are unlimited for us to responsibly choose our behavior, independent of all others in our life.
Change is ours, if we want it. A scowl from a spouse need not make us feel rejected. Criticism at work doesn't have to ruin our day. An inconsiderate bus driver might still be politely thanked. And when we decide for ourselves just how we want to act and follow through, self-esteem soars.
If we are put-down, it may momentarily create self-doubt; but when we quickly reassure ourselves that all is well and respond with respect, we grow. A sense of well-being rushes through our bodies.
Being in command of our own feelings and our own actions, prevents that free-floating anxiety from grasping us. We are who we choose to be. And new adventures await us.
The opportunities to react will be many today. But each time I can pause, determine the action I'd feel better about, and take it. My emotional health gets a booster shot each time I make a responsible choice.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the God idea did.

p. 52

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

After this incident in 1940, I sought some other means of livelihood. I had a very good friend who was in the government service, and I went to him about a job. He got me one. I worked for the government about a year and still maintained my evening office practice when the government agencies were decentralized. Then I went south, because they told me that the particular county I was going to in North Carolina was a dry county. I thought that this would be a big help to me. I would meet some new faces and be in a dry county.

pp. 238-239

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition One - "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. Unity."

So at the outset, how best to live and work together as groups became the prime question. In the world about us we saw personalities destroying whole peoples. The struggle for wealth, power, and prestige was tearing humanity apart as never before. If strong people were stalemated in the search for peace and harmony, what was to become of our erratic band of alcoholics? As we had once struggled and prayed for individual recovery, just so earnestly did we commence to quest for the principles through which A.A. itself might survive. on anvils of experience, the structure of our Society was hammered out.

pp. 130-131

************************************************** *********

The past remembered is a good guide for the future. --Chinese Proverb

"One that would have the fruit must climb the tree." --Thomas Fuller

Inspire someone to happiness today by sharing your own blessings and good fortune with them.

Blues Ain't Nothing But A Good Soul Feeling Bad.

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. --Helen Keller

Even when we make a mess of our lives, God loves us and helps us. --Joanne Hillman

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

HOPE

"The hopeful man sees success
where others see failure,
sunshine where others see
shadows and storm."
-- O. S. Marden

Spirituality involves our attitudes and perceptions as well as our
prayers. Spirituality requires a realistic awareness of what we need
and what we have been given. Spirituality sees beyond the problems
into the solution.

Hope is a feeling that is based on a spiritual perception of life that
shuns apathy and negativity. Everything can be used for good if it is
perceived realistically; destructive experiences, painful moments and
failed relationships can all be used to create a new tomorrow.

The hope that stems from our ability to change requires a realistic
understanding of what has happened. No aspect of life should be
wasted because it can point to a glorious tomorrow.

Teach me to discover the secret of success in the problems of life.

************************************************** *********

Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16

The Lord says, "As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you." Isaiah 66:13

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Through the power of God within me, I am stronger than any of my circumstances. Lord, I seek, I knock and I ask and You are always there and ready to give me the miracles that I need.

It is important to remember that different can be better. Lord, as I resist change and cling to the familiar, help me to remember that Your plan is perfect and will truly make me happy.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

What Is A Sponsor?

"…an NA sponsor is a member of Narcotics Anonymous, living our program of
recovery, who is willing to build a special, supportive, one-on-one relationship
with us."

IP No. 11, "Sponsorship, Revised"

What is a sponsor? You know: That nice person with whom you had coffee after
your first meeting. That generous soul who keeps sharing recovery experience
free of charge. The one who keeps amazing you with stunning insight regarding
your character defects. The one who keeps reminding you to finish your Fourth
Step, who listens to your Fifth Step, and who doesn't tell anyone how weird you
are.

It's pretty easy to start taking all this stuff for granted once we're used to
someone being there for us. We may run wild for a while and tell ourselves,
"I'll call my sponsor later, but right now I have to clean the house, go
shopping, chase that attractive." And so we end up in trouble, wondering where
we went wrong.

Our sponsor can't read minds. It's up to us to reach out and ask for help.
Whether we need help with our steps, a reality check to help us straighten out
our screwy thinking, or just a friend, it's our job to make the request.
Sponsors are warm, wise, wonderful people, and their experience with recovery is
ours — all we have to do is ask.

Just for today: I'm grateful for the time, the love, and the experience my
sponsor has shared with me. Today, I will call my sponsor.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
When I look back on all these worries I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which never happened. --Winston Churchill
A rolled-up ball of yarn does not take up much space--it sits, ready to be used when needed. It gets unrolled a little bit at a time--just as much as is needed and no more. But a ball of yarn that gets unraveled can be strewn across an entire room. It becomes a jumbled mass, entangled and confusing.
When we live our lives a day at a time, we are like that rolled-up ball of yarn. Our thoughts, feelings, and skills are ready to be used as they are needed. But when we worry, our spirit becomes a jumbled mass of yarn. We get ahead of and behind ourselves--our thoughts are scattered and often our feelings are confused. Worry adds clutter and confusion to life.
What is most helpful is to put the worry away--to roll up the ball of yarn and bring ourselves into the present moment. In this way, we stand ready for each new stitch--and we will never be given more than we are able to handle.
Do I have worries that are cluttering my life today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If the best man's faults were written on Us forehead, it would make him pull his hat over his eyes. --Gaelic proverb
When we deal with our faults and imperfections, we are dealing with the basic issues of being a person. We can become bitter and cynical about the imperfections of others, or we can realize every person is incomplete but growing, just as we are. The way we look at the faults in others and the way we look at our own are closely tied together. In our spiritual journey, we must begin with the premise that no person ever achieves perfection.
Perfection apparently is not what this life is about at all, since perfection is nonexistent. We are lovable, and we can love in the process of living our lives. Since we are not perfect, we have to be accountable. We must have standards for our behavior and hold ourselves to those standards, admitting our mistakes and making repairs where we can.
I will try to acknowledge my mistakes and give up the idea of ever becoming perfect.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Guilt
Feeling good about ourselves is a choice. So is feeling guilty. When guilt is legitimate, it acts as a warning light, signaling that we're off course. Then its purpose is finished.
Wallowing in guilt allows others to control us. It makes us feel not good enough. It prevents us from setting boundaries and taking other healthy action to care for ourselves.
We may have learned to habitually feel guilty as an instinctive reaction to life. Now we know that we don't have to feel guilty. Even if we've done something that violates a value, extended guilt does not solve the problem; it prolongs the problem. So make an amend. Change a behavior. Then let guilt go.
Today, God, help me to become entirely ready to let go of guilt. Please take it from me, and replace it with self-love.


Today I am willing to let go of all my thoughts and opinions that are negative and destructive in my life. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Listen to Your Inner Voice

Our inner voice, that quiet guide within, will lead us along our path, will help us create our destiny, will keep us in harmony.

So much stress comes from not listening, not trusting our inner voice. So much confusion comes from trying to act before we have heard, before we are guided. So much pain comes when we deny what that voice is saying, when we try to run from it or make it go away. We wonder how we can trust ourselves. The better question is, How can we not trust ourselves?

Our rage, anger, and most bitter resentments occur when we trust others rather than ourselves. Yes, sometimes promptings come from outside ourselves. The universe is alive, magical, responsive, and will guide us on our way. But the answer must always resonate, must always ultimately come from that place within our heart, our soul, our inner voice. Sometimes, we need to listen to others until we become impassioned enough to hear and trust ourselves.

It takes practice, the quiet practice of listening, until we learn how to hear ourselves, then interpret what we hear. It is neither wasted time nor incidental to our lives to learn to hear ourselves, to learn to tune into our hearts and souls. That’s part of the reason we’re here– part of our destiny, our mission, our purpose.

Our best work, our finest moments, our joy happen when we’re centered, listening to and trusting ourselves, allowing our hearts and souls to guide us. They happen when we allow ourselves to fully, completely, and in love, be who we are.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Watch out for that woohoo

That’s not flying….It’s falling with style.
–Woody, Toy Story

There is a term in skydiving called relative work. That means you’re controlling your fall rate to match those of the other jumpers in the air– falling in formation with them.

“We are flying,” said a sky diver, flush with adrenaline after a jump, “relative to each other.”

“Sure you are,” I said. “But relative to the earth, you’re falling, and that’s all that counts.”

It’s easy to get caught up in the woohoo of the moment. But don’t forget about humility and reality,too. We can make the right moves, assert ourselves, realize our dreams– but our plans need to be brought down to earth.

Find a path with heart, and walk it. Do things. Enjoy your activities. But also be aware that while you may feel like you are flying, there is a big green planet rushing toward you at 120 miles per hour that begs to differ.

Say woohoo. Have confidence. Then remember that there’s always a power greater than you.

God, help me remember to be grounded and humble in all that I do.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

When we first stopped drinking, using, over-eating, or gambling, it was an enormous relief to find that the people we met in The Program seemed quite different than those apparently hostile masses know as “They.” We were met not with criticism and suspicion, but with understanding and concern. However, we still encounter people who get on our nerves, both within The Program and outside it. Obviously, we must begin to accept the fact that there are people who’ll sometimes say things with which we disagree, or do things we don’t like. Am I beginning to see that learning to live with differences is essential to my comfort and, in turn, to my continuing recovery?

Today I Pray

May I recognize that people’s differences make our world go around and tolerate people who “rub me the wrong way.” May I understand that I must give them room, that some of my hostile attitudes toward others may be leftovers from the unhealthy days when I tended to view others as mobilized against me.

Today I will Remember

Learn to live with Differences.

****************************************

One More Day

Tragedy is an initiation not of human beings but of action, life, happiness, and unhappiness.
– Aristotle

Our response to tragedy can be rage, sorrow, or even horror. Those responses, as real as they are, are not as accurate as our optimism, for it is optimism … the belief that life will go smoothly … that gives the label “tragedy” to an event. We are surprised, we are shocked when our optimism is leveled by the unexpected.

A tragedy is an event, a time, a moment, and nothing more. People’s lives are constantly see-sawing between emotions and events. No one is always happy, placid, or tragic. In experiencing life to the fullest, we expose ourselves to all the facets. And that simple act makes us all uniquely human.

I accept my life and the ups and downs of my human experience.

************************************

Food For Thought

Small Decisions

We live this program one day at a time, one meal at a time. Throughout each day, we make many small decisions one at a time. We may often be tempted to take a tiny extra bite, to estimate a portion on the generous side rather than measuring it exactly, or to include a problem food in our menu plan.

Each time we decide not to take the tiny extra bite, each time we weigh and measure exactly, each time we decide to avoid the problem food, we become stronger. The next wise decision becomes easier to make.

One wrong decision does not have to ruin an entire day. None of us is perfect. We can learn to accept the fact of a mistake and move on to the next decision, which needs to be made. We can let our Higher Power total up our score and be the judge of how well we work the program. Our job is to work it, and at every moment we are free to decide wisely.

I pray for wisdom to make the right decisions.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

DISCIPLINE AND FREEDOM

" Freedom to a dancer means discipline.
That is what technique is for ... liberation."
Martha Graham

I was thinking this morning that keeping in fit spiritual condition was like being a dancer. A dancer knows that without the discipline of frequent training and rehearsal, he or she will not be able to dance freely when called upon to do so. The dancer who is not in shape will look wrong, feel wrong and become injured trying to do something wild and free. The training may be dull, boring and repetitive at times, but when the performance is on, the dancer soars in the freedom of movement.

I try to look at my daily program tasks the way a dancer looks at training. I may not like every minute, but I have the continual blessing of freedom as I go about my day and the hope of great moments of breakthrough into new freedoms as I progress.

One day at a time ...
I will take each step of my recovery program with my great vision of freedom.
~ Q.

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person like to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. - Pg. 30 - More About Alcoholism

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

The pain and struggle of early recovery is a powerful wind that blows through your life. It blows open the doors to your deepest emotions and tests the very fiber of your being. Yet, after the storm abates, you rebuild on the foundation of love from the fellowship.

In the coming days when I can't be grateful, when I cannot see past the storm, I listen to the beating heart of the fellowship.

Lighting One Candle

Today I will light one candle. I know in my heart that the world has so many sincere and good people in it. People who want to contribute to the world, whose hearts are set in the right direction. I join with all of those good souls today in my deep wish to be part of a force that can heal the world. I say a quiet prayer for all who need it and I unite my soul energy with like minded people. I trust that my good wishes for this world will unite with the good wishes of others and form a silent force that will gather in power and attract more and more energy. My prayers will not go unanswered because they are the prayers of so many. There are so many good people from all walks of life, all corners of the world. We have something very profound in common, our love of life, our love of our world.

I do a small thing with a full heart

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Try to live your life without adding to your Eight Step list. You have enough wreckage to clear up from the past without creating wreckage in the now.

When I feel my worst, I try my best.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Better to go through life sober, thinking you're an alcoholic, than go through life drunk thinking you're not.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I am willing to let go of all my thoughts and opinions that are negative and destructive in my life.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I've got a mind that's trying to kill me. - Bob P.

[bluidkiti]

February 9

Daily Reflections

GETTING THE "SPIRITUAL ANGLE"

How often do we sit in AA meetings and hear the speaker declare,
"But I haven't yet got the spiritual angle." Prior to this statement, he
had described a miracle of transformation which had occurred in him --
not only his release from alcohol, but a complete change in his whole
attitude toward life and the living of it. It is apparent to nearly
everyone else present that he has received a great gift; " . . . except
that he doesn't seem to know it yet!" We well know that this
questioning individual will tell us six months or a year hence that he
has found faith in God.
LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 275

A spiritual experience can be the realization that a life which once
seemed empty and devoid of meaning is now joyous and full. In my life
today, daily prayer and meditation, coupled with living the Twelve
Steps, has brought about an inner peace and feeling of belonging which
was missing when I was drinking.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

In the past, we kept right on drinking in spite of all the trouble we got
into. We were foolish enough to believe that drinking could still be fun
in spite of everything that happened to us. When we came into A.A.,
we found a lot of people who, like ourselves, had had fun with drinking,
but who now admitted that liquor had become nothing but trouble for
them. And when we found that this thing had happened to a lot of other
people besides ourselves, we realized that perhaps we weren't such
odd ducks after all. Have I learned to admit that for me drinking has
ceased to be fun and has become nothing but trouble?

Meditation For The Day

The lifeline, the line of rescue, is the line from the soul to God. On one
end of the lifeline is our faith and on the other end is God's power. It
can be a strong line and no soul can be overwhelmed who is linked to
God by it. I will trust in this lifeline and never be afraid. God will save
me from doing wrong and from the cares and troubles of life. I will
look to God for help and trust Him for aid when I am emotionally
upset.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that no lack of trust or fearfulness will make me disloyal to
God. I pray that I may keep a strong hold on the lifeline of faith.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Dealing with Resentments, p. 39

Resentment is the Number One offender. It destroys more alcoholics
than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we
have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have also been
spiritually ill. When our spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out
mentally and physically.

In dealing with our resentments, we set them on paper. We listed
people, institutions, or principles with whom we were angry. We asked
ourselves why we were angry. In most cases it was found that our
self-esteem, our pocketbooks, our ambitions, our personal relationships
(including sex) were hurt or threatened.

<< << << >> >> >>

"The most heated bit of letter-writing can be a wonderful safety
valve--providing the wastebasket is somewhere nearby."

1. Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 64-65
2. Letter, 1949

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Getting started Today____ Responsible activity
For the recovering person, every assignment or day's work can have a disagreeable moment. The problem is getting started____ overcoming our fear of taking the plunge.
The real problem is deeper than the wish to avoid mere unpleasantness. Some of our resistance to getting started may be fear of failure. It could also be a deep-seated desire to live in a problem free environment, where all of our needs can be met without effort on our part. It can even be a desire to return to the quest for constant excitement and stimulation.
We need to know that our answer is in guidance and acceptance. If we have truly committed our will and lives to the care and keeping of our Higher Power, we will find the right path for each day's work. We can also accept any work or challenge that occurs, knowing it is part of a higher order for our lives. Our current situation may be depressing or boring, but it can easily be a stepping stone to our long-term good.
I will meet today's challenges and responsibilities with gratitude and confidence, knowing that God is guiding and directing my life.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

H.A.L.T. -- AA Slogan
H.A.L.T. stands for Hungry, Angry, Lonely, and Tired. These feelings can be danger to us. They can lead us away from our program. We need to eat regular meals. When we get too hungry, we get cranky. Then we say and do things we regret. We need to turn anger over to our Higher Power, or else our anger turns into rage. We need friends to help us in recovery. If we get to lonely, we may turn our addictive way for friendship. We don't stay sober by ourselves. We need a clear mind to deal with life. If we get too tried, we tend to feel sorry for ourselves. Being tired get us into crazy thinking.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, remind me to H.A.L.T. Help me to not get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll review the four parts of H.A.L.T. In which areas do I practice good self-care? In which areas do I not? How can I improve?

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

We have seen too much defeatism, too much pessimism, too much of a negative approach. The answer is simple: if you want something very badly, you can achieve it. It may take patience, very hard work, a real struggle, and a long time; but it can be done . . . faith is a prerequisite of any undertaking. . . . --Margo Jones
How many dreams have we let die? How many projects did we start, only to leave them unfinished? How many times have we promised ourselves, "This time will be different," but then didn't work to make it so? Negativity breeds more negativity. Fortunately, its opposite does likewise. Our attitude will carry us a long way. And a positive attitude will make all things possible.
We are meant for good living. But we must seek it out and be open to its invitation, be willing to put forth the necessary effort. Our dreams are our invitations to move forward, to strive for a further goal. And having faith in our ability to achieve our dreams will make easier the necessary steps.
We have been blessed with dreams, all of us. They are gifts meant to stretch our capabilities.
I can trust my dreams and aspirations. They are mine, alone, and special to me. Achievement is possible; faith and a positive attitude will ease my efforts.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

The Wright brothers’ almost childish faith that they could build a machine which would fly was the mainspring of their accomplishment. Without that, nothing could have happened. We agnostics and atheists were sticking to the idea that self-sufficiency would solve our problems. When others showed us that “God-sufficiency" worked with them, we began to feel like those who had insisted the Wrights would never fly.

pp. 52-53

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

But I found that after I got to North Carolina, it wasn't any different. The state was different, but I wasn't . Nevertheless, I stayed sober there about six months, because I knew that Vi was to come later and bring the children. We had two girls and a boy at that time. Something happened. Vi had secured work in Washington. She was also in the government service. I started inquiring where I could get a drink, and, of course, I found that it wasn't hard. I think whiskey was cheaper there than it was in Washington. Matters got worse all the time until finally they got so bad that I was reinvestigated by the government. Being an alcoholic, slick, and having some good sense left, I survived the investigation. Then I had my first bad stomach hemorrhage. I was out of work for about four days. I got into a lot of financial difficulties too. I borrowed five hundred dollars from the bank and three hundred from the loan shop, and I drank that up pretty fast. Then I decided I'd go back to Washington.

p. 239

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition One - "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. Unity."

Countless times, in as many cities and hamlets, we reenacted the story of Eddie Rickenbacker and his courageous company when their plane crashed in the Pacific. Like us, they had suddenly found themselves saved from death, but still floating upon a perilous sea. How well they saw that their common welfare came first. None might become selfish of water or bread. Each needed to consider the others, and in abiding faith they knew they must find their real strength. And as they did find, in measure to transcend all the defects of their frail craft, every test of uncertainty, pain, fear, and despair, and even the death of one.

p. 131

************************************************** *********

Decision is the spark that ignites action. Until a decision is made, nothing happens. --Wilfred A. Peterson

"You've got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was." --Irish Proverb

"Don't rent space to anyone in your head." --Anon.

I trust and believe God wants good things for me. --Shelley

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.
It turns what we have into enough, and more.
It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity.
It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.
Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.
--Melody Beattie

When we look around us with eyes of faith, we may see paradise. --Scott Sawyer

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

ENVIRONMENT

"Love your neighbor as thyself,
but choose your neighbor."
-- Louise Beal

Part of my recovery and sobriety involves change. It is not enough to
"put down the jug" to gain sobriety; I need to make substantial
changes in my life.

Where I live, with whom I live, the friends I keep and the relationships
I make are crucial to my sobriety. Human beings imitate. They imitate
clothes, hairstyles and mannerisms. Sobriety is also imitated.

As a recovering alcoholic, I can only be spiritually happy with those
who are joyous and free; I need to find them.

God, You are to be found in Your creation. Let me seek You in a noble
lifestyle.

************************************************** *********

"For He Himself is our peace, who has made both one, and has broken down themiddle wall of separation." Ephesians 2:14

To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in His throne.
Revelation 3:21

"My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit's power." I Corinthians 2:4

"Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us." Psalm 62:8

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

When you feel down, look up. Lord, at all times and in the midst of all that is happening, You are there comforting, healing, and bringing peace to my life.

Know that you can do even if things are not always easy. Lord, in You I have the support of an unlimited power source and can accomplish great things because You strengthen me.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Self-acceptance

"When we accept ourselves, we can accept others into our lives, unconditionally
probably for the first time."

IP No. 19, "Self-Acceptance"

From our earliest memories, many of us felt like we never belonged. No matter
how big the gathering, we always felt apart from the crowd. We had a hard time
"fitting in." Deep down, we believed that if we really let others get to know
us, they would reject us. Perhaps our addiction began to germinate in this
climate of self-centeredness.

Many of us hid the pain of our alienation with an attitude of defiance. In
effect, we told the world, "You don't need me? Well, I don't need any of you,
either. I've got my drugs and I can take care of myself!" The further our
addiction progressed, the higher the walls we built around ourselves.

Those walls begin to fall when we start finding acceptance from other recovering
addicts. With this acceptance from others, we begin to learn the important
principle of self-acceptance. And when we start to accept ourselves, we can
allow others to take part in our lives without fear of rejection.

Just for today: I am accepted in NA; I fit in. Today, it's safe to start letting
others into my life.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Leave yourself alone. --Jenny Janacek
Three women were talking. One blamed herself for an unkind remark someone had made to her. Another blamed herself for not getting work done. The other compared her looks to those of the movie stars and thought she was ugly.
The women each noticed how the other two had put themselves down without being aware of it, and they began to laugh. Then they vowed to be as kind to themselves as they were to each other. Each time they caught themselves being mean to themselves, they imagined they were their own best friend, and were as understanding to themselves as they were to one another.
When we are kind to ourselves, only then can we be truly kind to others, and make ourselves a gift to those around us.
How have I been kind to myself lately?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The sad truth is that most evil is done by people who never make up their minds to be either good or evil. --Hannah Arendt
How often have we found ourselves in a predicament and innocently saying, "How did I get into this?" When someone has been injured by our actions because we failed to think about them, do we take the responsibility? If a friend is unfairly treated on the job, do we take a stand for him? When we know people are starving, what do we do about it? When our loved ones say they are lonely and wish we would talk to them, how do we respond?
In this program we have chosen to live by our values. We cannot sit passively and fail to live up to those values. Each situation is different, so we must think about what is called for. When we do not think about our reactions, we are in danger of adding to the evil in the world. When we act upon our principles, we feel more hopeful and wholesome.
Today, I will be alert to the difference between good and evil in my actions. I pray for the strength to take a stand.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Letting Go in Love
When people with a compulsive disorder do whatever it is they are compelled to do, they are not saying they don't love you - they are saying they don't love themselves. --Codependent No More
Gentle people, gentle souls, go in love.
Yes, at times we need to be firm, assertive: those times when we change, when we acquire a new behavior, when we need to convince others and ourselves we have rights.
Those times are not permanent. We may need to get angry to make a decision or set a boundary, but we can't afford to stay resentful. It is difficult to have compassion for one who is victimizing us, but once we've removed ourselves as victims, we can find compassion.
Our path, our way, is a gentle one, walked in love - love for self, love for others. Set boundaries. Detach. Take care of ourselves. And as quickly as possible, do those things in love.
Today, and whenever possible. God let me be gentle with others and myself. Help me find the balance between assertive action taken in my own best interests, and love for others. Help me understand that at times those two ideas are one. Help me find the right path for me.


Today I have the courage to follow my own inner voice that I hear in prayer and meditation. Today I dare to be true to myself and my own needs, whether anyone agrees with me or not. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Keep Your Heart Open

Keep your heart open, even when you can’t have what you want.

It’s easy to keep our heart open to life’s magic and all its possibilities when we have what we want. It’s more of a challenge, and more necessary than ever, to keep our hearts open when we can’t have what we want.

Even on the best journey, things happen. Plans change. Things shift and move around. This shifting and moving causes doors to close, relationships to end, blocks and frustrations to appear on our path. For now, that is what we see. For now, what we know is disappointment. We can’t have what we want, and it hurts. When that happens, our tendency may be to shut down, close our hearts, forget all we’ve learned.

Keep your heart open anyway. Consciously choose to do that. Yes, you can go away, you can leave, you can shut down, but you don’t need to. Now is a turning point. If you choose to open your heart, even when you can’t have what you want, miracles will unfold.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Get to know yourself

I opened the curtains in the King David Hotel overlooking the walled city in Jerusalem. This entire trip had been an adventure, but not the exciting kind. Nothing had gone as I planned. Usually on my excursions, I met people, connected with them, learned lessons, broke bread, and had fun. This trip had been different. I had barely spoken to anyone.

One night in the hotel restaurant, a woman motioned for me to join her for dinner. She spoke Hebrew. I spoke English. We sat and ate in silence. I had been to Egypt, the Sinai Peninsula. Now here. And that’s the closest I came to human contact on the entire trip.

The past week, I had traveled through Safad, a town in the Holy Land. It was the home of the kabbalah, the mystical sect of Judiasm, and one of the places where the purest, most intense form of meditation had been born. Although I had just wandered lightly through that land, something peculiar had happened to me, ever since I’d been there. I could hear my every thought. I was acutely aware of each emotion I felt.

It was as though my life had become a walking meditation.

But I was feeling lonely, and feeling bored.

“What’s wrong?” I asked. “Why haven’t I connected with anyone on this trip?”

“Yes, you have,” was the gentle answer I heard. “You’ve connected with yourself.”

Rays of light were streaming in through the window, in those first few colorful moments when the sun fills the sky. Music from a flute floated up from the courtyard below. Maybe even when we’re bored and lonely, all is well in the world.

Take some time on a regular basis to write in a journal, to meditate, or to do both. You’ll meet an interesting, exciting person. You’ll get to know yourself.

God, help me welcome those quiet spaces in my life as opportunities to connect with myself.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

The slogan “Live and Let Live” can be extremely helpful when we are having trouble tolerating other people’s behavior. We know for certain that nobody’s behavior — no matter how offensive, distasteful or vicious — is worth the price of a relapse. Our own recovery is primary, and while we must be unafraid of walking away from people or situations that cause us discomfort, we must also make a special effort to try to understand other people — especially those who rub us the wrong way. Can I accept the fat, in my recovery, that it is more important to understand than to be understood?

Today I Pray

When I run headlong into someone’s unpleasant behavior, may I first try my best to understand. Then, if my own sobriety seems threatened, may I have the courage to remove myself from the situation.

Today I Will Remember

Live and Let Live

****************************************

One More Day

A chronic illness invades life.
– Kathleen Lewis

Chronic illness means permanently changing our mindset to realize we can move only forward from this point in our life. Chronic illness means pushing back the “front tears” in our mind so we can expand the frontiers of our days. Being ill means sometimes laughing with tears trapped in our hearts, so we won’t have to be singled out as different from others. Chronic illness is becoming used to how we look today, right now, and not wasting more time longing for lost yesterdays.

If we haven’t realized it yet, we will need more emotional support than perhaps at any other time in our experience. Regardless of how strong and independent we may be, we need comfort and support from those who love us.

Longing for the “old days” and “old ways” won’t bring them back. I am learning to accept changes. They are not imposing upon my life — they are my life.

************************************

Food For Thought

You are not alone.

In the past, you may have fought a lonely battle with your inability to control your eating and the resultant weight problem. You may have thought that you were the only person who did such crazy, sneaky things in order to stuff yourself with food you did not need but could not stop eating. You may have lied to others about what you ate, and you may also have lied to yourself.

Family and friends probably tried to help. Despite the best intentions, it is difficult for one who is not a compulsive overeater to fully understand and help one who is.

In OA, you have been given a mutual support system. You have found people who understand you because they are like you. We all have the same problem, and together we are strong enough to solve it. Let's use the help that the OA fellowship gives us and gain strength from the greater strength of the group.

May I contribute to the warmth and support of the OA fellowship.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ BLESSINGS ~

There are no mistakes, no coincidences.
All events are blessings given to us to learn from.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

I certainly never had a charmed life as a child, and when I was told to count my blessings, I never thought that I had that much to shout about. I was a shy and lonely child, always self-conscious about my shape and size, and everyone else seemed to be far better off than I was. When life started to deal out blows that were far more than I thought I could handle, I wondered why bad things always seemed to happen to me. I would hardly recover from one traumatic event when another one was upon me. I felt life was definitely unfair. Using food seemed to be the only way that I knew to cope.

I was looking for a solution, for some way to make my life a happier one. Fortunately, I was finally brought to my knees by the pain of my compulsive overeating. In working the Steps of this wonderful program, I have come to some amazing realizations. All the time I had railed against my misfortunes, I was being brought to some new understanding.

With the growing openness I now have, I can more clearly see why certain things in my life had to happen, and even why I became a compulsive overeater. Unlike the past, when I used to hate this disease, I now see it as a blessing, from which I can learn and grow. If it were not for this disease, I would not have needed to look at my life, nor would I have had to work at trying to make myself into a better person. I most certainly would not have needed to find a God of my understanding, nor would I have met so many wonderful new friends, who always love and support me.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will remember that the events in my life are not dealt out to me as a form of punishment, but rather as motivating factors in my life, that spur me on to grow and change as a person.
~ Sharon S. ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We have learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. - Pg. 30 - More About Alcoholism

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote


Service to another addict/alcoholic or to our group can help calm us when the jitters get rough. Think of one other fellow recoverer who also seemed jittery at the last meeting or maybe didn't show up. You can get in touch with them today and ask if you can help.

God, as I understand You, give me the right words to comfort or to encourage a fellow alcoholic / addict.

Living Truly

Today I will live the life I wish to have. If I want not be manipulative or deceitful in my relationships, I will be an honest person. If I want goodness and decency surrounding me, I will be good and decent. If I want to feel love coming towards me, I will love others. Today I won't ask life to be something I'm not willing to be. Today, I accept that what I put out, comes back to me.

I live the life I want to have

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

When you work with others, you allow Divine Intelligence to speak and smile through you. You allow the Divine to reach out and hug the drunk, the junkie, and the dope head.

All people smile in the same language.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Nobody 'gives' you a bad day without your permission.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I have the courage to follow my own inner voice that I hear in prayer and meditation. Today I dare to be true to myself and my own needs, whether anyone agrees with me or not.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

It says in Chapter Five; 'If you have decided you want what we have..' Decision. '..and are willing to go to any lengths to get it.' Action. As far as I can tell, that summarizes everything in life: Decision, Action, Result. - Cubby S.

[bluidkiti]

February 10

Daily Reflections

I DON'T RUN THE SHOW

When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed
crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to
fearlessly face the proposition that either God is
everything or else He is nothing. God either is, or
He isn't. What was our choice to be?
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p.53

Today my choice is God. He is everything. For this I
am truly grateful. When I think I am running the show
I am blocking God from my life. I pray I can remember
this when I allow myself to get caught up into self.
The most important thing is that today I am willing
to grow along spiritual lines, and that God is
everything. When I was trying to quit drinking on my
own, it never worked; with God and A.A., it is
working. This seems to be a simple thought for a
complicated alcoholic.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Since I realize that I had become an alcoholic and
could never have any more fun with liquor and since
I knew that from then on liquor would always get me
into trouble, common sense told me that the only
thing left for me was a life of sobriety. But I
learned another thing in A.A., the most important
thing anyone can ever learn, that I could
call on a Higher Power to help me keep away from
liquor, that I could work with that Divine Principle
in the universe and that God would help me to live
a sober, useful, happy life. So now I no longer care
about the fact that I can never have any more fun
with drinking. Have I learned that I am much happier
without it?

Meditation For The Day

Like a tree, I must be pruned of a lot of dead
branches, before I will be ready to bear good fruit.
Think of changed people as trees which have been
stripped of their old branches, pruned, cut and bare,
but through the dark, seemingly dead branches flows
silently, secretly, the new sap, until with the sun
of spring, comes new life. There are new leaves, buds,
blossoms and fruit, many times better because of the
pruning. Remember, I am in the hands of a Master
Gardener, who makes no mistakes in His pruning.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may cut away the dead branches of my
life. I pray that I may not mind the pruning, since
it helps me to bear good fruit later.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Membership Rules?, p. 41

Around 1943 or 1944, the Central Office asked the groups to list their
membership rules and send them in. After they arrived we set them all
down. A little reflection upon these many rules brought us to an
astonishing conclusion.

If all of these edicts had been in force everywhere at once it would have
been practically impossible for any alcoholic to have ever joined A.A.
About nine-tenths of our oldest and best members could have never
gotten by!

<< << << >> >> >>

At last experience taught us that to take away any alcoholic's full chance
for sobriety in A.A. was sometimes to pronounce his death sentence, and
often to condemn him to endless misery. Who dared to be judge, jury,
and executioner of his own sick brother?

1. Grapevine, August 1946
2. 12 & 12, p. 141

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

What is rightfully mine___Personal Gains
One of the hard lessons of life is that we can't always "win" in the worldly game for prestige, power, and property. It is especially galling to see rewards going to others that don't seem to have earned them. Much of the world's conflict, in fact, grows out of disputes over what rightfully belongs to whom.
In sobriety, we need a higher perspective than what we're likely to find in the brawling world around us. Rather than demanding rights to anything, we should know that everything is part of a spiritual world. The real meaning of the last line of The Lord's Prayer is that all power, prestige, and property belong to our Higher Power. Whatever we have or will acquire is only temporary, at best, and can easily be lost through wrong thinking and bad actions.
Emmet Fox, whose writings guided the early A members, taught that we possess things only through "rights of consciousness." In perfectly legitimate ways, we will always possess whatever is necessary for our real work in this life. If one door closes, another will always open. We do not have to envy anything that others possess, nor should we attempt to wrestle it from them. God will always lead us to whatever we need for our highest good.
I will not fret this day about any lost property or opportunities. My needs will be met in a satisfactory manner as I continue to seek the highest and best in every situation.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Life didn't promise to be wonderful. ---Teddy Pendergrass
Life doesn't promise us anything, except a chance. We have a chance to live any way we like. No matter how we choose to live, we'll have pain and we'll have joy. And we can learn from both.
Because of our recovery program, we can have life's biggest wonder---love. We share it in a smile, a touch, a phone call, or a note. We share it with our friends, our partners, our family. Life didn't promise to be wonderful, but it sure is full of little wonders! And we only have to open up and see them, feel them, and let them happen.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see the wonders of life today, in nature, in people's faces, in my own heart.
Action for the Day: I can help make a wonderful things happen for others, with a smile, a greeting, a helping hand. What "little" things will I do for somebody today?

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

God knows no distance. --Charleszetta Waddles
As close as our breath is the strength we need to carry us through any troubled time. But our memory often fails us. We try, alone, to solve our problems, to determine the proper course of action. And we stumble. In time we will turn, automatically, to that power available. And whatever our need, it will be met.
Relying on God, however we understand God's presence, is foreign to many of us. We were encouraged from early childhood to be self-reliant. Even when we desperately needed another's help, we feared asking for it. When confidence wavered, as it so often did, we hid the fear--sometimes with alcohol, sometimes with pills. Sometimes we simply hid at home. Our fears never fully abated.
Finding out, as we all have found, that we have never needed to fear anything, that God was never distant, takes time to sink in. Slowly and with practice it will become natural to turn within, to be God-reliant rather than self-reliant.
Whatever our needs today, God is the answer.
There is nothing to fear. At last, I have come to know God. All roads will be made smooth.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

Logic is great stuff. We like it. We still like it. It is not by chance we were given the power to reason, to examine the evidence of our sense, and to draw conclusions. That is one of man’s magnificent attributes. We agnostically inclined would not feel satisfied with a proposal which does not lend itself to reasonable approach and interpretation. Hence we are at pains to tell why we think our present faith is reasonable, why we think it more sane and logical to believe than not to believe, why we say our former thinking was soft and mushy when we threw up our hands in doubt and said, “We don’t know.”

p. 53

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

My wife received me graciously, although she was living in a one-room-with-kitchen affair. She'd been reduced to that. I promised that I was going to do the right thing. We were now both working in the same agency. I continued to drink. I got drunk one night in October, went to sleep in the rain, and woke with pneumonia. We continued together, and I continued to drink, but I guess, deep down within our hearts, we both knew I couldn't stop drinking. Vi thought I didn't want to stop. We had several fights, and on one or tow occasions I struck her with my fist. She decided that she didn't want any more of that. So she went to court and talked it over with the judge. They cooked up a plan whereby she didn't have to be molested by me if she didn't want to be.

pp. 239-240

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition One - "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. Unity."

Thus has it been with A.A. By faith and by works we have been able to build upon the lessons of an incredible experience. They live today in the Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous, which - God willing - shall sustain us in unity for so long as He may need us.

p. 131

************************************************** *********

"Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind." --Henry James

"You have it easily in your power to increase the sum total of this world's happiness now. How? By giving a few words of sincere appreciation to someone who is lonely or discouraged. Perhaps you will forget tomorrow the kind words you say today, but the recipient may cherish them over a lifetime." --Dale Carnegie

"You will regret many things in life but you will never regret being too kind or too fair." -–Brian Tracy

In the process of growing to spiritual maturity, we all go through many adolescent stages. --Miki L. Bowen

Love is not an exchange of favors. Love is something you give away.

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

INSIGHT

"Nothing is more terrible than
activity without insight."
-- Thomas Carlyle

I believe that recovery can only begin when we "see" or start to get a
glimpse of who we are and what we are dealing with . . . insight; an
insight into self.

However, the moment we begin to see must be followed by a
determined effort to discover more; digging through the denial, pain
and manipulation to the disease. Then after discovering the disease in
our lives, we must be prepared to risk talking about it --- on a daily
basis.

Recovery requires a daily desire to see, discover and talk about our
addiction --- with this insight comes recovery.

You are the light of the world; shine through my honesty.

************************************************** *********

"Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Praise the Lord!" Psalms 150:6

"Remember to welcome strangers, because some who have done this have welcomed angels without knowing it." Hebrews 13:2

"Love your neighbor as you love yourself." Galatians 5:14

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Each morning gives us one more chance to pray, one more chance to help another and one more chance to make this a better world. Lord, thank you for working in and through everything.

Not one day passes without receiving wonderful blessings from our loving and generous God. Lord, may I forget the irritations that distract me from Your happiness.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Fun!

"In recovery our ideas of fun change"

Basic Text, p. 102

In retrospect, many of us realize that when we used, our ideas of fun were rather bizarre. Some of us would get dressed up and head for the local club. We would dance, drink and do other drugs until the sun rose. On more than one occasion, gun battles broke out. What we then called fun, we now call insanity.

Today, our notion of fun has changed. Fun to us today is a walk along the ocean, watching the dolphins frolic as the sun sets behind them. Fun is going to an NA picnic, or attending the comedy show at an NA convention. Fun is getting dressed up to go to the banquet and not worrying about any gun battles breaking out over who did what to whom.

Through the grace of a Higher Power and the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous, our ideas of fun have changed radically. Today when we are up to see the sun rise, it's usually because we went to bed early the night before, not because we left a club at six in the morning, eyes bleary from a night of drug use. And if that's all we have received from Narcotics Anonymous, that would be enough.

Just for today: I will have fun in my recovery!

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A bird does not sing because he has an answer. He sings because he has a song. --Joan Walsh Anglund
Each of us has a song to sing, just as birds do. Part of knowing who we are is appreciating our own songs. Are our songs gentle like the robins, or are we brilliant leaders like the bluejay? Are we easy to be around like the sparrow, or do we radiate joy and laughter like the loon?
Each of these birds has something special to offer. So do we, with our own unique personalities and talents. What a waste it would be if the loon never dashed across the lake because he wanted to be a robin instead. It is important to learn who we are and to believe we are special in our own way. We give joy to the world around us when we sing our own songs.
Have I listened to my own song lately?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert's there are few. --Shunryu Suzuki
As we travel the path of recovery, we are sometimes overwhelmed by a feeling of how much we lack. It rises within us as a feeling of inadequacy, emptiness, or loneliness. We are in pain because we feel like such beginners. Now we need to discard our competitive thinking, our drive to be on top, and accept another, wiser, way of seeing. The big difference is in being on the path of recovery rather than lost on some diversion, as we have been in the past. It is not important how far along we are or who is ahead of whom. The important thing is that we are on the path and experiencing the process.
In recovery, wisdom comes with staying a beginner. Then we remain open to further learning. In some sense this program and our mutual powerlessness are the great levelers. Once on the path, we are all equals.
Today, I will appreciate my vulnerability. It keeps me spiritually alive and growing.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Sadness
A block to joy and love can be unresolved sadness from the past.
In the past, we told ourselves many things to deny the pain: It doesn't hurt that much.... Maybe if I just wait, things will change.... It's no big deal. I can get through this.... Maybe if I try to change the other person, I won't have to change myself.
We denied that it hurt because we didn't want to feel the pain.
Unfinished business doesn't go away. It keeps repeating itself, until it gets our attention, until we feel it, deal with it, and heal. That's one lesson we are learning in recovery from codependency and adult children issues.
Many of us didn't have the tools, support, or safety we needed to acknowledge and accept pain in our past. It's okay. We're safe now. Slowly, carefully, we can begin to open ourselves up to our feelings. We can begin the process of feeling what we have denied so long - not to blame, not to shame, but to heal ourselves in preparation for a better life.
It's okay to cry when we need to cry and feel the sadness many of us have stored within for so long. We can feel and release these feelings.
Grief is a cleansing process. It's an acceptance process. It moves us from our past, into today, and into a better future - a future free of sabotaging behaviors, a future that holds more options than our past.
God, as I move through this day, let me be open to my feelings Today, help me know that I don't have to either force or repress the healing available to me in recovery. Help me trust that if I am open and available, the healing will happen naturally, in a manageable way.


Today I look inside for my answers. Today I will trust my instincts and my connecting to my Higher Power. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Free Yourself from Manipulation

Learn to recognize passive-aggressive hits. Learn to recognize when other people have hidden agendas, when they’re trying to control or manipulate you. When we’re being controlled, we may feel guilty, obligated, indebted. In our muddled state, we agree to another’s wishes but we’re not sure why. Then we wander around feeling uncertain, unbalanced, confused.

The lesson still isn’t about them. The lesson is about how we respond. If their behavior, their energy, is affecting us that strongly, it’s because something in us needs to be healed. A part of us isn’t clear, is still mucked up by something old and outworn, such as guilt or fear. Once we heal ourselves, we will know how to deal with their energy, how to handle their passive-aggressive behavior and their attempts to control us. Then we can thank them for helping trigger our healing process, for helping us grow.

Everything that happens along the way is part of the journey. Everything can be incorporated into our healing process. All roads lead to growth.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Say woohoo even if you don’t like where you are

“Once you get into the desert there’s no going back,” said the camel driver.” And when you can’t get back, you have to worry only about the best way of moving forward.”
–Paulo Coello, The Alchemist

Sometimes we get into situations and we can easily get out. We date someone, it’s not right for us, and we stop seeing that person. We experiment with drinking or drugs, decide that this isn’t for us, and we stop experimenting. We accept a job, it’s not what we want or hoped it would be, so we leave and find another.We may even marry someone who’s not right for us, and we get out. No children. No excessive property or financial entanglements. It’s a mistake. We’re sorry. There may be a few emotions involved, but correction is relatively painless and easy.

There are other times when it’s not easy. We don’t just date the person. We get married, have one or more children, and then realize we’ve made a mistake. We begin using alcohol or drugs, and wake up one day to find that our life is out of control. What we need to do is stop drinking, and it’s the very thing we can’t do, at least not without help. Or we accept the job or sign a contract, one with serious legal entanglements and consequences.

These are the situations that bring us to our knees. It is in these situations that we work out our destiny. If we’ve hit a point of no return with some situation in our lives, the only way out is through.

Surrender to the experience. You may not have bargained for this, may not have consciously desired it. Learn to say woohoo anyway. You’re meeting your destiny head-on. A spiritual adventure has just begun.

God, help me be gentle with others and myself as we each work out our destinies, karma, and fate. Give me the courage, help, insight, resilience, and grace to learn all the lessons I came here to face.

Activity: Write your memoirs. This is an extensive activity. If you take the time to do it, you will learn much about yourself. Break down your life into stories. Don’t worry about writing a literary masterpiece. Just break your life down into sections and write about what you learned. Write about what you went through– how you thought it would be, what it actually turned into, how you struggled against this, and how you finally saw the light and learned the lesson at hand. We all have ways of keeping a timeline of our lives, for instance, graduation, marriage, divorce, getting that big job, our sobriety date. This is a journal you may want to keep and add to for the rest of your life. It is your book of life. An interesting twist on this activity is to give your memoirs to your children, or ask your parents to do this activity as a gift. Reading your parents’ memoirs can be an enlightening and healing event.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Until now, we may have equated the idea of beginning again with a previous record of failure. This isn’t necessarily so. Like students who finish grade school and begin again in high school, or workers who find new ways to use their abilities, our beginnings must not be tinged with a sense of failure. In a sense, every day is a time of beginning again. We need never look back with regret. Life is not necessarily like a blackboard that must be erased because we didn’t solve problems correctly, but rather a blackboard that must be cleaned to make way for the new. Am I grateful for all that has prepared me for this moment of beginning?

Today I Pray

May I understand that past failures need not hamper my new courage or give a murky cast to my new beginnings. May I know, from the examples of others in The Program, that former failings, once faced and rectified, can be a more solid foundation for a new life than easy-come successes.

Today I Will Remember

Failings can be footings for recovery.

****************************************

One More Day

The best thinking has been done in solitude. The worst has been done in turmoil.
– Thomas Edison

When the rush of a busy world becomes overwhelming, we can restore ourselves to peace and tranquility. When we feel battered by the stress of the day, it’s time to take a few moments for relaxation. We need to steady ourselves; in fact, we owe it to ourselves.

Solitude, meditation, serenity — these can be ourse if we settle in for a few moments of private time. Alne. Taking this time is not self-indulgent; it’s self-care and simple to do. We can tune the radio to some beautiful, soft music and sit back with a cup of herbal tea. Taking slow breaths, we can allow our bodies to relax with the warmth of the tea, the beauty of the music and the solitude of the moment.

I relish the gift of privacy and relaxation each day.

************************************

Food For Thought

Write Before You Eat

When you are tempted to grab an extra bite, stop and make contact with another OA member. If you cannot bring yourself to make the call, or if you make it and still want to eat, then try writing.

Before you take the bite, write down exactly how you are feeling, what you think the extra food will do for you, what the likely result will be, and how you will feel an hour later. It is a good idea to keep a pad of paper handy in the kitchen; you can grab a pencil instead of food.

Often the process of writing down exactly how you are feeling will reveal the hidden emotions which are masquerading as hunger and a desire to eat. You may discover that you are angry, or fearful, or lonely. Write the feelings and write the consequences of eating because of them.

Grant me insight, Lord, and self-understanding.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ ATTITUDE ~

The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude.
Viktor Frankl

I have always found someone like Viktor Frankl to be an inspiration. His attitude to life totally amazes me, especially after suffering and losing all his family in the Nazi concentration camps. How could anyone come away from an experience like that and still find meaning in life, much less meaning in suffering? I certainly could never find any meaning in all the years of suffering through compulsive eating which caused me so much pain. Life didn't seem meaningful at the time, and I wondered if it ever could. But one of the things I have learned in the program is that I can allow myself to wallow in self pity, which I did many times, or I can take the lessons from my life's experiences and use them as opportunities for growth. That has not been an easy one for me in my journey, and there have been many times when life just seemed to be too hard. I wondered whether I had the same strength and positive attitude that Viktor Frankl did. Intellectually I know that attitude is a choice I make. There have been times when I've been depressed and full of self pity and I allowed myself to sink into that abyss of despair. But now, knowing that I have a choice, that I can pick myself up and "act as if," I can have a positive attitude. When I make the positive choice, miraculous things happen, and life somehow seems a lot easier.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will make a choice to think positive thoughts, and try to emulate people like Viktor Frankl and others who have battled enormous difficulties and yet kept a positive attitude. When I do that, I know my life will become infinitely better.
~ Sharon ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Here are thousands of men and women, worldly indeed. They flatly declare that since they have come to believe in a Power greater than themselves, to take a certain attitude toward that Power, and to do certain simple things, there has been a revolutionary change in their simple way of living and thinking. - Pg.50 - We Agnostics

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

In the beginning there probably isn't much time that goes by when you don't think about using. This is normal, after all, you've just lost your constant companion. Only time will remove your constant thoughts of your old buddies, drugs and alcohol, but it does pass.

Every time I think getting high would feel good, let me remember the pain in my gut and fear in my heart just a short time ago.

Getting Even Today

I will push myself through to letting go of some recent insult, knowing that if I don't I bind myself to that energy. Revenge only keeps me stuck at the place of wrong doing. Better to let go the hurt or insult than the act of kindness. If I want to continue to grow my blessings in life, I will look up not down. Today I will look toward someone who has been good to me and I will think of a way to repay their kindness, knowing that when I do that, my own life feels better, too.

I connect myself to the energy of goodness.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Do not ask what your Higher Power can do for you, but rather what you can do for your Higher Power. This gets us out of self.

Dear God, what can I do for you today?

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Formula for failure: try to please everyone.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I look inside for my answers. Today I will trust my instincts and my connecting to my Higher Power.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

An alcoholic is anyone I don't like who drinks more than me. - Dylan Thomas.

[bluidkiti]

February 11

Daily Reflections

THE LIMITS OF SELF-RELIANCE

We asked ourselves why we had them [fears]. Wasn't it
because self-reliance failed us?
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p.68

All of my character defects separate me from God's will.
When I ignore my association with Him I face the world
and my alcoholism alone and must depend on self-reliance.
I have never found security and happiness through
self-will and the only result is a life of fear and
discontent. God provides the path back to Him and to
His gift of security and comfort. First, however, I
must be willing to acknowledge my fears and understand
their source and power over me. I frequently ask God to
help me understand how I separate myself from Him.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

If we're going to stay sober, we've got to learn to want
something else more than we want to drink. When we first
came into A.A., we couldn't imagine wanting anything else
so much or more than drinking. So we had to stop drinking
on faith, on faith that someday we really would want
something else more than drinking. But after we've been
in A.A. for a while, we learn that a sober life can
really be enjoyed. We learn how nice it is to get along
well with our family at home, how nice it is to do our
work well at the office, how nice it is to try to help
others. Have I found that when I keep sober, everything
goes well for me?

Meditation For The Day

There is almost no work in life so hard as waiting. And
yet God wants me to wait. All motion is more easy than
calm waiting, and yet I must wait until God shows me His
will. So many people have marred their work and hindered
the growth of their spiritual lives by too much activity.
If I wait patiently, preparing myself always, I will be
some day at the place where I would be. And much toil
and activity could not have accomplished the journey so
soon.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may wait patiently. I pray that I may trust
God and keep preparing myself for a better life.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Self-Confidence and Will Power, p. 42

When first challenged to admit defeat, most of us revolted. We had
approached A.A. expecting to be taught self-confidence. Then we had
been told that so far as alcohol was concerned, self-confidence was no
good whatever; in fact, it was a total liability. There was no such thing
as personal conquest of the alcoholic compulsion by the unaided will.

<< << << >> >> >>

It is when we try to make our will conform with God's that we begin to
use it rightly. To all of us, this was a most wonderful revelation. Our
whole trouble had been the misuse of willpower. We had tried to
bombard our problems with it instead of attempting to bring it into
agreement with God's intention for us. To make this increasingly
possible is the purpose of A.A.'s Twelve Steps.

12 & 12
1. p. 22
2. p. 40

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Practice makes patience.
Acquiring Maturity
Extreme impatience is part of most alcoholic stories: "I want what I want when I want it." When it continues in sobriety, impatience leads to mistakes and accidents. How can we bring impatience under control without losing all drive and initiative?
One route may be to acquire patience through practice. We can devote some time each day to a task that must be done, even if it is tedious and boring. We can make a real effort to be more patient with somebody who is slow or difficult. We can face the fear and anxiety that sometimes make us overwork or turn us into people-pleasers.
These exercises won't eliminate impatience overnight. But they'll produce the satisfaction of knowing that we're getting control of our lives. They will also make us more effective in our dealings with others.
Reminding ourselves that all outcomes aqre in God's hands can help us acquire patience. Willful pushing does not bring the serenity and well being we really seek. We labor in vain if we are seeking goals that are not in line with God's will for us.
I will do my work today with the knowledge that God really is in charge of my life… I do not have to let anything or anyone rob me of my serenity and self-control. I will practice patience in situations where it is needed.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Sanity is madness put to good use.---George Santayana
In Step Two we come to believe a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. In a way, as we work Step Two, we're praying that our madness can be put to good use. This is just what happens. Addiction was wrecking our life. But it's also our addiction that forced us into a new way of life.
As long as we remember what our madness was like, we can put it to good use. When we feel like giving up, let's remember our madness. It will help us go on. When we see someone suffering from the illness of addiction, let's remember our days of madness. It will help us be there for that person. It's also good to remember that our madness is only a pill or a drink away.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I believe You can put my madness to good use. I give up my madness; do with it what You want.
Action for the Day: I'll list a couple ways my Higher Power and I have changed my madness into sanity.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

It's odd that you can get so anesthetized by your own pain or your own problem that you don't quite fully share the hell of someone close to you. --Lady Bird Johnson
Preoccupation with self can be the bane of our existence. It prevents all but the narrowest perspective on any problem. It cuts off any guidance from our higher power that may be offered through a friend. It blocks whatever truths are trying to gain our attention. The paradox is that whatever our pain, it is lessened by turning our attention elsewhere, to another's pain or her joy.
When we open our minds to fresh input from others, insights emerge. We need the messages others are trying to give us. Nothing that is said in a loving spirit is empty of meaning for our lives.
We might consider that every conversation we have is a conversation with our Creator. What we need to know, for our own growth, is guaranteed to be revealed in our many conversations with others. But we can't hear another's thoughts until we let go of our own.
Full attention to the persons sent to me will offer me exactly what I need, today. My inner guide has beckoned them. I can be alert, expect solutions, and celebrate the wonder of it all.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crises we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is or He isn’t. What was our choice to be?
Arrived at this point, we were squarely confronted with the question of faith. We couldn’t duck the issue. Some of us had already walked far over the Bridge of Reason toward the desired shore of faith. The outlines and the promise of the New Land had brought lustre to tired eyes and fresh courage to flagging spirits. Friendly hands had stretched out in welcome. We were grateful that Reason had brought us so far. But somehow, we couldn’t quite step ashore. Perhaps we had been leaning too heavily on reason that last mile and we did not like to lose our support.

p. 53

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

I went back to my mother's for a few days until things cooled off, because the district attorney had put out a summons for me to come to see him in his office. A policeman came to the door and asked for James S., but there wasn't any James S. There. He came back several times. Within ten days I got locked up for being drunk, and this same policeman was in the station house as I was being booked. I had to put up a three-hundred-dollar bond because he was carrying the same summons in his pocket for me. So I went down to talk to the district attorney, and the arrangement was made that I would go home to stay with my mother, and that meant Vi and I was separated. I continued to work and continued to go to lunch with Vi, and none of our acquaintances on the job knew that we had separated. Very often we rode to and from work together, but being separated really galled me deep down.

p. 240

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Two - "For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority - a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience."

Where does A.A. get its direction? Who runs it? This, too, is a puzzler for every friend and newcomer. When told that our Society has no president having authority to govern it, no treasurer who can compel the payment of any dues, no board of directors who can cast an erring member into outer darkness, when indeed no A.A. can give another a directive and enforce obedience, our friends gasp and exclaim, "This simply can't be. There must be an angle somewhere." These practical folk then read Tradition Two, and learn that the sole authority in A.A. is a loving God as He may express Himself in the group conscience. They dubiously ask an experienced A.A. member if this really works. The member, sane to all appearances, immediately answers, "Yes! It definitely does." The friends mutter that this looks vague, nebulous, pretty naive to them. Then they commence to watch us with speculative eyes, pick up a fragment of A.A. history, and soon have the solid facts.

p. 132

************************************************** *********

Serenity isn't freedom from the storm, it is peace within the storm.

When we release the bitterness, judgment and blame of the past, whether of ourselves or others, the past becomes a stepping stone to spiritual growth, to increased compassion, understanding and love. Today, repeat several times, "I bless my past and see it as a stepping stone to greater good." --Mary Manin Morrissey

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it. --William Arthur Ward

Great Spirit, grant that I may not criticize my neighbor until I have walked a mile in his moccasins. --Native American Proverb

Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man's growth without destroying his roots. --Frank A. Clark

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

PITY

"When a man has pity on all
living creatures, then only is he
noble."
-- Buddha

We all need each other. More than this, we need to help and sustain
each other. And this concept extends beyond human beings --- the
world is full of other creatures that God has made and which make our
lives so fascinating and entertaining. Animals and plants make up our
ecological history and yet so often we rob and hurt our environment.

Recovery from alcoholism means more than putting down "the drink".
Today I am picking up a responsible attitude that makes me care, on a
spiritual level, for my world.

Lord, as I look around my world I cannot help but worship You.

************************************************** *********

If we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests which we have asked from Him. 1 John 5:14-15

"I sought the Lord, and he answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. Look to him, and be radiant. Psalm 34:4-5

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

God will answer our prayers if we believe, but first we must ask. Lord, I need the strength that only You can give.

God will give you strength because He will give of Himself. Lord, thank You for the many gifts of which You always bless me.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

A Curse Into A Blessing

"We have become very grateful in the course of our recovery.... We have a disease, but we do recover" Basic Text, p. 8

Active addiction was no picnic; many of us barely came out of it alive. But ranting against the disease, lamenting what it has done to us, pitying ourselves for the condition it has left us in—these things can only keep us locked in the spirit of bitterness and resentment. The path to freedom and spiritual growth begins where bitterness ends, with acceptance.

There is no denying the suffering brought by addiction. Yet it was this disease that brought us to Narcotics Anonymous; without it, we would neither have sought nor found the blessing of recovery. In isolating us, it forced us to seek fellowship. In causing us to suffer, it gave us the experience needed to help others, help no one else was so uniquely suited to offer. In forcing us to our knees, addiction gave us the opportunity to surrender to the care of a loving Higher Power.

We would not wish the disease of addiction on anyone. But the fact remains that we addicts already have this disease— and further, that without this disease we may never have embarked on our spiritual journey. Thousands of people search their whole lives for what we have found in Narcotics Anonymous: fellowship, a sense of purpose, and conscious contact with a Higher Power. Today, we are grateful for everything that has brought us this blessing.

Just for today: I will accept the fact of my disease, and pursue the blessing of my recovery.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Life deals more rigorously with some than others. --Lewis F. Presnall
How often we think about a friend, He sure is lucky! And probably just as often we say to ourselves, Why did that happen to me? It's not fair! The truth is, life isn't always fair. We don't all get the same experiences, the same lessons. But we each learn what we need to learn in order to fulfill our destiny.
We have to learn to trust. Maybe a bike gets stolen or a friend moves away. It's not easy to accept such things as these, but we must all learn to understand and accept losses in our lives.
Perhaps we fail a test. The lesson we learn from this may be to study harder or to consider a different course of study in school. There are always reasons for why things happen, but we don't have to know them.
Can I trust in the lessons of my failures today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Too much agreement kills a chat. --Eldridge Cleaver
Many of us haven't learned there is room for disagreement in a relationship. Some men who grew up in addicted families saw a lot of pain, anger, and quarreling. Many learned to be always pleasing and agreeable, no matter how they felt. Others took it as a personal insult when someone disagreed with them.
We choke the vitality and excitement in our love relationships if we are too intent on avoiding conflict. Nothing can be resolved if we smooth everything over. Differences between people don't just go away. If we don't bring them out, they fester and create silent tension or boredom. If we willingly express our thoughts and feelings, we can learn how to resolve our disagreements and to appreciate each other for our differences as well as our similarities. If two people in a relationship were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.
Today, I will try to be more open about my differences with people, not as a way of fighting, but as a way of letting them know me better.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Divinely Led
Send me the right thought, word, or action. Shaw me what my next step should be. In times of doubt and indecision please send your inspiration and guidance.
--Alcoholics Anonymous
The good news of surrendering ourselves and our life to a Power greater than ourselves is that we come into harmony with a Grand Plan, one greater than we can imagine.
We are promised Divine Guidance if we ask for it if we work the Twelve Steps. What greater gift could we receive than knowing our thoughts, words, and actions are being directed?
We aren't a mistake. And we don't have to control or repress others or ourselves for life to work out. Even the strange, the unplanned, the painful, and those things we call errors can evolve into harmony.
We will be guided into understanding what we need to do to take care of ourselves. We will begin to trust our instincts, our feelings, and our thoughts. We will know when to go, to stop, and to wait. We will learn a great truth: the plan will happen in spite of us not because of us.
I pray today and each day that my thoughts, words, and actions may be Divinely led. I pray that I can move forward in confidence, knowing my steps are guided.


Even in moments of doubting, I know that my Higher Power has been guiding me on my path today. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
The Universe Is Abundant

Watch out for greed-- greed for money, for resources, for love. Greed can slowly corrupt the heart. Greed can slowly take over our lives. Greed and fear can block our connection with the universe, and with universal love.

Let go of the fears of deprivation, of doing without, that haunt you from the past. Having more and more won't solve your problem if what you need is to heal your fears. Look around with love at your life and the people in it. If you open your heart and look without fear, you may see that you have enough now.

Go back to your heart. Let love, not fear and greed, lead the way. Be led by your desire to joyfully serve, by the desire to bring your gifts, your healing, your comforts and talents to others. Go back to your heart as often as you need. And remember what is honorable and true. Say to those you love. This is what I shall give. And I'll give it because my heart leads me to do so.


The universe is abundant. Take your part, take your place, in universal love. Go back to your heart. Give from the heart. And the universe will respond in kind.

*****

more language of letting go
Grief


No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing. ... Not that I am (I think) in much danger of ceasing to believe in God. The real danger is of coming to believe such dreadful things about Him. The conclusion I dread is not "So there's no God after all," but " So this is what God's really like. Deceive yourself no longer."
--C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

There's no way to prepare for deep grief, for the pain that shatters a heart and a life when a beloved leaves.

No one can coach us on it. Those who could, who knew exactly how it felt; who could describe it in detail, wouldn't do it, would not presume to encroach on this most intimate part of our relationship with a loved one. Those who casually say, "Aren't you over that yet?" don't understand.

This much I will tell you about grief. If there was ever a second, or a moment, when you suspected or knew you had been betrayed at the deepest level by someone you adored, and a splintering pain began to shred your heart, turn your world grimly unbearable to the point where you would consciously choose denial and ignorance about the betrayal rather than feel this way, that is one-millionth of what it feels like to grieve.

Grief is not an abnormal condition, nor is it something to be treated with words. It is a universe, a world, unto itself. If you are called to enter this world, there is no turning back. We are not allowed to refuse that call. Grief is like nothing else, with the possible exception of the pounding waves of the ocean. To the untrained, casual eye, each wave looks the same. It is not. No two are the same. And each one washes away the old, and washes in the new.

Gradually, almost imperceptibly, whether we believe it or not, we are being transformed.


God, take care of me those moments and hours when I cannot find the will or power to take care of myself. Transform me, if not in the twinkling of an eye, then over the slow movement of the years, into who I will become.

*****

A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
I can always take strength and comfort from knowing I belong to a worldwide fellowship. Hundreds and hundreds of thousands, just like myself, are working together for the same purpose. None of us needs to ever be alone again, because each of us in our own way works for the good of others. We are bound together by a common problem that can be solved by love and understanding and mutual service. The Program – like the little wheel in the old hymn – runs by the grace of God.

Have I thanked God today for helping me to find The Program, which is showing me the way to a new life?

Today I Pray
May my thanks be lifted to God each day for dispelling my self-inflicted loneliness, for warming my stoicism, for leading me to the boundless fund of friendship in The Program.

Today I Will Remember
I have a world of friends.

****************************************

One More Day

“You are responsible for your own life and have a job to perform in your healthcare.”
– Neil A. Fiore

It’s a real shock to find out that we have an ongoing medical problem. Lots of us may get quite angry and blame the doctor for the diagnosis. Or we may want to turn it all over to the professionals. But soon we begin to see that we are the primary ones responsible for ourselves. Eventually, we begin to give full cooperation to our doctors and therapist. We become equal members of our healthcare team.

Adjustments are difficult in the best of circumstance, but with the help of those who love us, with the assistance of our doctors, and with our participation, we adjust to chronic illness. Then we can see our problems in their proper perspective and begin again to enjoy our lives.

In accepting changes in my life, I find balance once again.

************************************

Food For Thought

Simplicity

Someone has said that God is simple; it is we who cause the complications. The more we are able to simplify our lives, the more effective we become.

A simple eating plan frees us from being preoccupied with food. We decide what we will have for our three measured meals, we may call the plan in to a sponsor, and then we can forget about food. We are free to concentrate on the jobs and activities of the day. In contrast, how muddled and messy our lives were when we were bingeing!

Turning our will and our life over to our Higher Power frees us from preoccupation with self. Rather than trying to figure out complicated methods of getting things to go our way, we are free to live each day as God gives it to us, trusting His will.

As we grow in this program, may we grow in simplicity.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

FREEDOM

“Always be a first-rate version of yourself,
instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.”
Judy Garland

As far back as I can remember I always wanted to be like -- or act like -- someone else. I never allowed myself the freedom to be me. I was my parents' child, my husband's wife, and my children's mother. It wasn't until I came into program wearing all of my identities on my body -- 150 pounds’ worth -- that I was able to see how unhappy I really was.

I began my journey to recovery by slowly discovering the real me underneath all that extra weight. Working the Twelve Steps of recovery helped me to peel away the layers of fear that kept me stuck.


One Day at a Time . . .
I am free to be me ~
And I am enough.
~ Eileen

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

But what about the real alcoholic? He may start off as a moderate drinker; he may or may not become a continuous hard drinker; but at some stage of his drinking career he begins to lose all control of his liquor consumption, once he starts to drink. - Pg. 21 - There Is A Solution

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Even when we consciously don't think we want to get high, our disease of addiction works through our subconscious and calls, 'what do they know; just one won't hurt; well, if they're going to be like that!' Our subconscious pops silly excuses for using into our minds. We must learn to recognize and neutralize these thoughts.

May my subconscious 'arguments' that subtly tell me to use, have no power to influence my true goal of staying clean and clear.

I Can Lift My Own Spirits

I will lift my own spirits today. I will look for that place in me that is still and serene, that isn't just constantly in response mode. Somewhere there is a constant, meditative place where the little and even the even big concerns of the day slip away and become less important. A place where life is just life and I can breathe in and out of a place of inner calm. Life doesn't have to prove itself to me today for me to treasure it. It is enough that I am here, that I have my freedom of thought and movement. I will appreciate the life I have.

I am connected with the divine

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

People who seek a sponsor without faults, will be without a sponsor.

I know that my sponsor is willing to make mistakes, if I am willing to learn from them.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Focus on the program, not the problem.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Even in moments of doubting I know that my Higher Power has been guiding me on my path today.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I wanted to be Clint Eastwood but I was more like Woody Allen. - Trip S.

[bluidkiti]

February 12

Daily Reflections

"THE ROOT OF OUR TROUBLES"

Selfishness--self-centeredness! That, we think, is the
root of all our troubles.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 62

How amazing the revelation that the world, and everyone
in it, can get along just fine with or without me. What
a relief to know that people, places and things will be
perfectly okay without my control and direction. And
how wordlessly wonderful to come to believe that a power
greater than me exists separate and apart from myself.
I believe that the feeling of separation I experience
between me and God will one day vanish. In the meantime,
faith must serve as the pathway to the center of my
life.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

As we look back on all those troubles we used to have
when we were drinking, the hospitals, the jails, we
wonder how we could have wanted that kind of life. As we
look back on it now, we see our drinking life as it
really was and we're glad we're out of it. So after a few
months in A.A., we find that we can honestly say that we
want something else more than drinking. We've learned by
experience that a sober life is really enjoyable and we
wouldn't go back to the old drunken way of living for
anything in the world. Do I want to keep sober a lot more
than I want to get drunk?

Meditation For The Day

My spiritual life depends on an inner consciousness of
God. I must be led in all things by my consciousness of
God and I must trust Him in all things. My consciousness
of God will always bring peace to me. I will have no fear,
because a good future lies before me as long as I keep my
consciousness of God. If in every single happening, event
and plan I am conscious of God, then no matter what
happens, I will be safe in God's hands.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may have this ever-consciousness of God.
I pray for a new and better life through this God
consciousness.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

How Much Anonymity?, p. 43

As a rule, the average newcomer wanted his family to know
immediately what he was trying to do. He also wanted to tell others
who had tried to help him--his doctor, his minister, and close friends.
As he gained confidence, he felt it right to explain his new way of life
to his employer and business associates. When opportunities to be
helpful came along, he found he could talk easily about A.A. to almost
anyone.

These quiet disclosures helped him to lose his fear of the alcoholic
stigma, and spread the news of A.A.'s existence in his community.
Many a man and woman came to A.A. because of such conversations.
Since it is only at the top public level that anonymity is expected, such
communications were well within its spirit.

12 & 12, pp. 185-186

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Do it sober___ Practicing Principles
There may be a hidden meaning in that bumper sticker that reminds us to "Do it Sober," but we can also read it to mean that real sobriety should guide everything we do today.
Real sobriety is emotional sobriety. We have it when our principles protect us from overpowering feelings growing out of greed, fear, and resentment. Even without the bottle, an attack of fear or resentment can distort personal judgment and lead to foolish mistakes. Whatever we do, whether it's sweeping a factory floor or leading a corporate board meeting, we should do with confidence and calm self-control.
When we work in this way, we help others. We only harm them if we bring bitterness and resentment into their space. True emotional sobriety helps us set a better example and assures others that AA really works in people's lives. One AA member was pleasantly surprised when he was complimented for remaining calm in confrontations with angry people. HE realized that his AA principles had been at work in his workplace, helping him to maintain a calm dignity that made him assertive and effective. Whatever we do sober, we always do better.
Today I'll remind myself to stay emotionally as well as physically sober. So-called Dry Drunks are not slips, but they destroy my effectiveness and should have no place in my life.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

We are always the same age inside.---Gertrude Stein
Deep inside, we each have a child's spirit. We still have many of the feelings we had when we were young. Some of us have a hurting child inside. There's sadness, fear, or anger that hasn't gone away. We're still lonely, no matter how many people care about us. Our inner child needs special help to heal. We can be good parents to our inner child. We do this by being gentle and caring with ourselves. In time, this child can be a happy center in our hearts.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, please heal the child inside of me a little more each day. Help my inner child be alive, free, and full of joy.
Action for the Day: Right now, I'll close my eyes for a minute. I'll think kind thoughts about myself. Than I'll say out loud, "Inner child, I love you. I'll take good care of you." I'll do this two more times today.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

There are no new truths, but only truths that have not been recognized by those who have perceived them without noticing. --Mary McCarthy
We understand today ideas we couldn't grasp yesterday. We are conscious this year of details of our past that we may have glossed over at the time. Our blinders are slowly giving way, readying us for the truths we couldn't absorb before.
"When the student is ready, the teacher appears." And the teacher comes bearing truths that we need to assimilate into our growing bank of knowledge. The truths we may be given today, or any day, won't always make us happy immediately. We may learn that a job is no longer right for us. Or that a relationship has reached an end. And the impending changes create unrest. But in the grand scheme of our lives, the changes wrought by these truths are good and will contribute in time to our happiness.
Let's celebrate the truths as they come and trust the outcome to God. We are traveling a very special road. The way is rocky. The bends limit our vision, but we will be given all the direction we need.
The truths I receive today will guide my steps. I shall move in peace.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

That was natural, but let us think a little more closely. Without knowing it, had we not been brought to where we stood by a certain kind of faith? For did we not believe in our own reasoning? did we not have confidence in our ability to think? What was that but a sort of faith? Yes, we had been faithful, abjectly faithful to the God of Reason. So, in one way or another, we discovered that faith had been involved all the time!

pp. 53-54

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

The November following, I took a few days off after pay day to celebrate my birthday on the twenty-fifth of the month. As usual I got drunk and lost the money. Someone had taken it from me. That was the usual pattern. I sometimes gave it to my mother, and the I'd go back and hound her for it. I was just about broke. I guess I had five or ten dollars in my pocket. Anyhow, on the twenty-fourth, after drinking all day on the twenty-third, I must have decided I wanted to see my wife and have some kind of reconciliation or at least talk with her. I don't remember whether I went by streetcar, whether I walked or went in a taxicab. The one thing I can remember now was that Vi was on the corner of 8th and L, and I remember talking to her, but what happened after that I don't know. What actually happened was that I had taken a penknife and stabbed Vi three times with it. Then I left and went home to bed. Around eight or nine o'clock there came two big detectives and a policeman to arrest me for assault; and I was the most amazed person in the world when they said I had assaulted my wife. I was taken to the station house and locked up.

pp. 240-241

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Two - "For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority - a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience."

What are these facts of A.A. life which brought us to this apparently impractical principle?
John Doe, a good A.A. moves - let us say - to Middletown, U.S.A. Alone now, he reflects that he may not be able to stay sober, or even alive, unless he passes on to other alcoholics what was so freely given him. He feels a spiritual and ethical compulsion, because hundreds may be suffering within reach of his help. Then, too, he misses his home group. He needs other alcoholics as much as they need him. He visits preachers, doctors, editors, policemen , and bartenders ... with the result that Middletown now has a group, and he is the founder.

pp. 132-133

************************************************** *********

When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.

May I be an example to those whose lives touch mine. --Shelley

The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. --Chinese Proverb

Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another. --Walter Elliott

There is no pillow so soft as a clear conscience. --French Proverb

You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late. --Ralph Waldo Emerson

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

FREEDOM

"Freedom comes from human
beings, rather than from laws and
institutions."
-- Clarence Darrow

The disease of alcoholism does not live in bottles or books. It lives in
people. Drug problems are people problems. Sobriety exists in the
man, not the theory.

In this sense recovery must be experienced, rather than simply talked
about. The Program is essentially not written in books or taught in
lecture rooms but is lived in the lives of people; the program stems
from the heart of man.

I believe the program is that spark of divinity that God has bestowed
upon all of us --- and we must discover it within.

Teach me to remember that to think a smile without revealing a smile
is to be grumpy.

************************************************** *********

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalms 19:14

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Ephesians 6:10

But you, O Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, and the one who lifts up my head. Psalm 3:3

Praise the LORD. Praise God in his sanctuary; praise him in his mighty heavens. Praise him for his acts of power; praise him for his surpassing greatness. Praise him with the sounding of the trumpet, praise him with the harp and lyre, praise him with tambourine and dancing, praise him with the strings and flute, praise him with the clash of cymbals, praise him with resounding cymbals. Let everything that has breath praise the LORD. Praise the LORD. Psalm 150

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Closeness with family makes us one in heart and mind. Lord, help me to fill our home with love and make it our safe haven from the troubles of the world.

Forget what you have done for others and remember what they have done for you. Lord, a gift is given freely with no expectation. May I become a truly giving person.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Living In The Moment
"We regretted the past, dreaded the future, and weren't too thrilled about the present." Basic Text, p. 7

Until we experience the healing that happens when we work the Twelve Steps, it is doubtful that we can find a statement more true than the quote above. Most of us come to NA hanging our heads in shame, thinking about the past and wishing we could go back and change it. Our fantasies and expectations about the future may be so extreme that, on our first date with someone, we find ourselves wondering which lawyer we'll use for the divorce. Almost every experience causes us to remember something from the past or begin projecting into the future.

At first, it's difficult to stay in the moment. It seems as though our minds won't stop. We have a hard time just enjoying ourselves. Each time we realize that our thoughts are not focused on what's happening right now, we can pray and ask a loving God to help us get out of ourselves. If we regret the past, we make amends by living differently today; if we dread the future, we work on living responsibly today.

When we work the steps and pray each time we discover we're not living in the present, we'll notice that those times aren't occurring as often as they used to. Our faith will help us live just for today. We'll have hours, even days, when our full attention is focused on the current moment in time, not the regrettable past or fearful future.

Just for today: When I live fully in each moment, I open myself to joys that might otherwise escape me. If I am having trouble, I will ask a loving God for help.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Oh, a trouble's a ton, or a trouble's an ounce, Or a trouble is what you make it, And it isn't the fact that you're hurt that counts, But only how you take it. --Edmund Vance Cooke
Once, a woman decided to throw a problem-exchange party. As guests arrived, they shed all their personal problems and tossed them onto a pile with everyone else's. After all had discussed their own problem for others to hear, the party ended with guests selecting from the problem pile those they wished to carry away. Each person left with the same troubles he or she had brought to the party.
We who worry a great deal about our problems are always sure no one else has troubles as bad as ours. Too often, we complain, "If you had my problems, you'd really hurt." Our problems are tailored to us, and geared to help us learn by solving them. No one else's would be quite right.
When we cope with problems, rather than wailing about them, we discover that our own are minor irritations compared to those we see in others.
What problems am I lucky to have?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live up to the light I have.
--Abraham Lincoln
With too much focus on control, we men have been preoccupied by our overemphasis on outcomes. We say winning is everything, and the way we play the game doesn't matter. We give honor to a man who has accumulated great wealth, regardless of how he has lived. We develop sexual problems because we focus on performance and achieving orgasm rather than on the joy of loving.
As our integrity grows, our emphasis changes. It is not crucial that we always be right, only that we be honest. We do not have to be winners or high achievers so much as we have to be real human beings. Conquest is not as important as connection. We do not always have to compare ourselves and be better than the next guy. We can exchange and appreciate the communication.
Today, I will grow in my relationships with others by being more true to myself and less driven toward a particular outcome.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Those Not in Recovery
We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering.
Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge it is cold and dark. We stood there with others in the cold and darkness, doubled over in pain. Some of us developed an eating disorder to cope with the pain. Some drank; some used other drugs. Some of us lost control of our sexual behavior. Some of us obsessively focused on addicted people's pain to distract us from our own pain. Many of us did both: we developed an addictive behavior, and distracted ourselves by focusing on other addicted people. We did not know there was a bridge. We thought we were trapped on a cliff.
Then, some of us got lucky. Our eyes opened, by the Grace of God, because it was time. We saw the bridge. People told us what was on the other side: warmth, light, and healing from our pain. We could barely glimpse or imagine this, but we decided to start the trek across the bridge anyway.
We tried to convince the people around us on the cliff that there was a bridge to a better place, but they wouldn't listen. They couldn't see it; they couldn't believe. They were not ready for the journey. We decided to go alone, because we believed, and because people on the other side were cheering us onward. The closer we got to the other side, the more we could see, and feel, that what we had been promised was real. There was light, warmth, healing, and love. The other side was a better place.
But now, there is a bridge between those on the other side and us. Sometimes, we may be tempted to go back and drag them over with us, but it cannot be done. No one can be dragged or forced across this bridge. Each person must go at his or her own choice, when the time is right. Some will come; some will stay on the other side. The choice is not ours.
We can love them. We can wave to them. We can holler back and forth. We can cheer them on, as others have cheered and encouraged us. But we cannot make them come over with us.
If our time has come to cross the bridge, or if we have already crossed and are standing in the light and warmth, we do not have to feel guilty. It is where we are meant to be. We do not have to go back to the dark cliff because another's time has not yet come.
The best thing we can do is stay in the light, because it reassures others that there is a better place. And if others ever do decide to cross the bridge, we will be there to cheer them on.
Today, I will move forward with my life, despite what others are doing or not doing. I will know it is my right to cross the bridge to a better life, even if I must leave others behind to do that. I will not feel guilty. I will not feel ashamed. I know that where I am now is a better place and where I'm meant to be.


As I let go of all the negative tapes that block my truth, I trust and follow the energy that leads me to peace and joy. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Fill Your World with Color and Beauty

Fill your life and your world with the colors, textures, scents, and objects that are beautiful to you, that have meaning to you. Remember that we are connected to our environment. The objects and the colors in our world have energy and meaning. They have an impact on us.

The more we see how connected we are, the more carefully and thoughtfully we may want to choose the items we place in our home, or our space at work, if we have a special area, because these objects and colors can reflect how we feel about ourselves and what is important to us.

Objects have energy. They have energy already in them when we obtain them, and they have the energy and meaning we attribute to them. Choose carefully the possessions you want around you, for they tell a story all day long.

Fill your world, your life, with objects that are beautiful and have special meaning to you. What articles and hues have you surrounded yourself with at home, at work? Is there a special article you want close to you, on your desk, in your locker, in your pocket? What story do these things tell about you, about what you’re going through, about your place in your journey?

Choose objects and colors that make your heart smile.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Starting over

How many times do we have to start over?

Many changes in our lives signal a major ending or beginning: death, birth, graduation, marriage, divorce, moving to a new home, getting sober, losing a job, or beginning a new career. We look around and think, Here we go. I’m starting over again.

Sometimes we don’t catch on at first. Sometimes it just feels like day after day of the same old thing as the old fades away and the new begins. Sometimes it feels like our lives have just stopped. Whether we believe it or not, when one cycle ends, a new one begins.

If life as you have known it is disappearing, it may be time to let go. Even if you can’t see it now– and you probably can’t– a new life will begin fading in to take its place. You and your life are being transformed.

How many times do we have to start over? As many times as life as we know it ends.

Say woohoo. You’re being born again.

God, help me trust that a new life awaits me if life as I’ve known it is fading away. Give me the patience and trust to sink joyfully into the void.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

I am grateful for my friends in The Program. Right now I am aware of the blessings of friendship — the blessings of meeting, of sharing, of smiling, of listening, and of being available when needed. right now I know that if I want a friend, I must be a friend. Will i vow, this day, to be a better friend to more people? Will I strive, this day — in my thoughts, words and actions — to disclose the kind of friend I am?

Today I Pray

May I restore in kind to the fellowship of The Program the friendship I have so hungrily taken from it. After years of glossing my lonely existence with superficial acquaintanceship, may I learn again the reciprocal joys of caring and sharing.

Today I Will Remember

Be A Friend.

****************************************

One More Day

I am where I am because I believe in life’s possibilities.
– Oprah Winfrey

During the years of our youth we were continually reminded, “You can do it. Just set a goal and then reach a little beyond it.” Many of us were better at this as youngsters than we are as adults. We each have fought our own battles — to become educated or perhaps to achieve a promotion or new job. We tend to get a little short-sighted when a new variable enters the picture — a changing health pattern.

Too many of us back away, fearful the we’ll have all we can do to just orchestrate our own health care. It’s imperative that we continue to believe in ourselves as human beings with great potential — it matters less that we reach each goal. It matters most that we try.

I am setting new goals that offer challenge and the chance for success.

************************************

Food For Thought

Acceptance

When we have given our lives back to our Higher Power, we gradually learn to accept what happens to us as part of His plan. Most of us made a mess of trying to run our own lives. We are amazed at how much better things go when we acknowledge that the Power greater than ourselves is in control.

Every experience, the bad one as well as the good one, becomes an opportunity to learn and to serve. We may not like what it is that we are given to do or to feel on a particular day, but we learn to accept it as necessary for our growth. We can look back and see that we have learned even more from our failures than from our successes.

When we accept our lives and ourselves as part of God's creation, we are open to the work of His spirit and His love. Then positive change and growth become possible.

Teach me to accept Your will.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ POSITIVE THINKING ~

"We could accomplish many more things
if we did not think of them as impossible"
Jean-Jacques Rousseau
from his "Lettres à M. de Malesherbes

I have spent a lifetime dieting. My life can be easily separated into two sections: the dieting periods and the non-dieting, or bingeing, periods. When I first start losing weight, I am positive about it, to the point where, if I go clothes shopping, I even buy things in smaller sizes because soon I won't be as big as I am. This works fine while I'm losing weight, but when I reach a plateau and remain at the same weight level for a while, or even worse, gain a bit, I start to think that I'll never lose the weight I need to lose, that my sticking to a "diet" for the rest of my life is nigh to impossible.

Well, with stinking thinking like this, I'm defeated before I've even started. Through this program, I've learned that anything is possible. First of all, it's true that sticking to a diet for the rest of my life would be an impossible feat, but in program we don't "go on diets." We follow a sensible eating plan, and this plan should be flexible enough that it IS something we can follow indefinitely. Secondly, I have to correct my time spans. Instead of thinking of it as "the rest of my life," I have the option to think of it as "One Day at a Time," and we can do anything for just one day, can't we?

One day at a time ...
I remember that's all it takes...one day at a time.
Marjee

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

In any meeting, anywhere, A.A.'s share experience, strength, and hope with each other, in order to stay sober and help other alcoholics. Modem-to-modem or face-to-face, A.A.'s speak the language of the heart in all its power and simplicity. - Pg. xxiv - Foreword To Fourth Edition

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Slogans seem silly but they are important tools: first things first; one day at a time; kiss. We say them frequently because we need to burn them into our thoughts. Slogans are not 'fillers' for reluctant speakers. They embody important principles necessary to our path of recovery.

With the next slogan I hear, let me really HEAR it, know its importance, and practice it.

Treasures

If I am alive then I need to look around me and feel thankful for the gifts that are mine. There is so much to be grateful for if I am willing to consider the blessings I already have. There is a wisdom in gratitude because what I focus on with appreciation has a way of expanding in my life. If I erase my blessings, I don't feed them with the grace of gratitude. If I give thanks for them, I show the creative force that brings forth all good things that I am worthy enough to appreciate what has been so generously given to me.

I know enough to say thank you

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

You are either progressing or regressing. There is no such thing as standing still; there is no such thing as simply 'gressing.'

I can only coast one way, and that's downhill.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Sobriety is never an accident.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

As I let go of all the negative tapes that block my truth, I trust and follow the energy that leads me to peace and joy.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Willpower tells me I must. Willingness tells me I can. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

February 13

Daily Reflections

WE CAN'T THINK OUR WAY SOBER

To the intellectually self-sufficient man or woman,
many A.A.'s can say, "Yes, we were like you--far too
smart for our own good.... Secretly, we felt we could
float above the rest of the folks on our brain power
alone."
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 60

Even the most brilliant mind is no defense against the
disease of alcoholism. I can't think my way sober. I
try to remember that intelligence is a God-given
attribute that I may use, a joy--like having a talent
for dancing or drawing or carpentry. It does not make
me better than anyone else, and it is not a particularly
reliable tool for recovery, for it is a power greater
than myself who will restore me to sanity--not a high
IQ or a college degree.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Sometimes we can't help thinking: Why can't we ever drink
again? We know it's because we're alcoholics, but why did
we have to get that way? The answer is that at some point
in our drinking careers, we passed what is called our
"tolerance point." When we passed this point, we passed
from a condition in which we could tolerate alcohol to a
condition in which we could not tolerate it at all. After
that, if we took one drink we would sooner or later end
up drunk. When I think of liquor now, do I think of it as
something that I can never tolerate again?

Meditation For The Day

In a race, it is when a goal is in sight that heart and
nerves and muscles and courage are strained almost to the
breaking point. So with us. The goal of the spiritual life
is in sight. All we need is the final effort. The saddest
records made by people are those who ran well, with brave
stout hearts, until the sight of the goal and then some
weakness or self-indulgence held them back. They never
knew how near the goal they were or how near they were to
victory.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may press on until the goal is reached.
I pray that I may not give up in the final stretch.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Daily Acceptance, p. 44

"Too much of my life has been spent in dwelling upon the faults of
others. This is a most subtle and perverse form of self-satisfaction,
which permits us to remain comfortably unaware of our own defects.
Too often we are heard to say, 'If it weren't for him (or her), how
happy I'd be!"

<< << << >> >> >>

Our very first problem is to accept our present circumstances as they
are, ourselves as we are, and the people about us as they are. This is
to adopt a realistic humility without which no genuine advance can
even begin. Again and again, we shall need to return to that
unflattering point of departure. This is an exercise in acceptance that
we can profitably practice every day of our lives.

Provided we strenuously avoid turning these realistic surveys of the
facts of life into unrealistic alibis for apathy or defeatism, they can be
the sure foundation upon which increased emotional heath and
therefore spiritual progress can be built.

1. Letter, 1966
2. Grapevine, March 1962

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

When Others Don't perform____Personal Responsibility
There will be times when other people will disappoint us.. either intentionally or because of indifference or incompetence. If we have been counting on them, their nonperformance can cause us real anger and frustration.
Our growth, however, should teach us that such failures are part of life. While never losing trust in others, we must accept them as fallible people. Their mistakes and lapses come from the human shortcomings all of us have.
Our best course is to live without expecting too much from others. They are not here to please or satisfy us. It's possible, too, that we've been unrealistic in some of our expectations and have set ourselves up for disappointments.
Our personal responsibility is to do our best even when others fall short of our expectations. At the same time, we can grow by becoming more reliable and dependable ourselves.
We cannot use another's failure as an excuse for negligence on our part.
Today I'll expect the best, but I will know that I also have the spiritual resources to deal with the worst that can happen.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Tomorrow doesn't matter, for I have lived today. --Horace
Life is found in the present. One of the first things we hear when we enter the program is, One Day at a Time. We break life into short time periods. This give us the power to change. We're not sure we can stay sober for a lifetime. But we know that with God, and our program, we can stay sober for today.
This holds true for many other things in out lives. We're not sure we can go a lifetime without feeling self-pity, but we can give it up for a day. By living One Day at a Time, we become more sure of our strength. We have the power to change things only in the present. The present holds much for us, if we get a hold on it.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You are found in the moment. You are here. I will stay with You minute by minute.
Action for the Day: I will ground myself in the present. Today, I'll not worry about the past or the future.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

I have sacrificed everything in my life that I consider precious in order to advance the political career of my husband. --Pat Nixon
Putting another person's needs first is what most of us were trained to do when growing up. We were seldom encouraged to embark on an individual course, and years of taking a back seat taught us that our hopes mattered little.
Now, for some of us, the future looks like a blank wall. It is time to carve out a plan for ourselves, yet how do we decide where we want to go? And how do we get there? The program says, "Live one day at a time." Our friends say, "Take one step at a time."
We have chosen to do something about the circumstances we found ourselves in, or we wouldn't be reading these words. We can stop for a moment and reflect on the many changes thus far. We are already on our way. We have taken a number of necessary steps. What an exciting adventure we have embarked upon! And we will be helped all along the way.
We can trust our inner yearnings, the ones we may have stifled in times past. We can realize our hearts' pure desires, if we seek guidance.
My time has come. I can mold my future. I will take each day, each experience, and let it draw me to the next important step.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

We found, too, that we had been worshippers. What a state of mental goose-flesh that used to bring on! Had we not variously worshipped people, sentiment, things, money, and ourselves? And then, with a better motive, had we not worshipfully beheld the sunset, the sea, or a flower? Who of us had not loved something or somebody? How much did these feelings, these loves, these worships, have to do with pure reason? Little or nothing, we saw at last. Were not these things the tissue out of which our lives were constructed? Did not these feelings, after all, determine the course of our existence? It was impossible to say we had no capacity for faith, or love, or worship. In one form or another we had been living by faith and little else.

p. 54

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

The next morning I went up for arraignment. Vi was very kind and explained to the jury that I was basically a fine fellow and a good husband but that I drank too much and that she thought I had lost my mind and should be committed to an asylum. The judge said that if she felt that way, he would confine me for thirty days' examination and observation. There was no observation. There might have been some investigation. The closest I came to a psychiatrist during that time was an intern who came to take blood tests. After the trial, I got big-hearted again and felt that I should do something in payment for Vi's kindness to me; so I left Washington and went to Seattle to work. I was there about three weeks, and then I got restless and started to tramp across the country, here and there, until I finally wound up in Pennsylvania, in a steel mill.

p. 241

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Two - "For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority - a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience."

Being the founder, he is at first the boss. Who else could be? Very soon, though, his assumed authority to run everything begins to be shared with the first alcoholics he has helped. At this moment, the benign dictator becomes the chairman of a committee composed of his friends. These are the growing group's hierarchy of service - self-appointed, of course, because there is no other way. In a matter of months, A.A. booms in Middletown.

p. 133

************************************************** *********

"Letting go of the past and not worrying about the future seems a small price to pay for all the happiness to be found in the present."

The richest man, whatever his lot, is he who is content with what he has got. --Dutch Proverb

If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else. --Booker T. Washington

God help me relax and let my answer about what to do next come naturally from you. --Melody Beattie

We are loved completely by a God who knows us completely. --Pedro A. Sandin-Fremaint

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

REALITY

"It is the chiefest point of
happiness that man is willing to
be what he is."
-- Desiderious Erasmus

I am an alcoholic. Today I am able to love myself because I am able
to accept myself.

More than this: because I am able to accept myself, I am able to be
myself. The acceptance of my disease around alcohol has taught me
that I am not perfect, and I do not live in a perfect world --- this leads
to an acceptance of others. My pain around alcohol has given me an
insight into the sufferings of others --- and this has produced spiritual
growth.

I am happy not because I am an alcoholic but because I know that I
am an alcoholic. Today I can be what I was meant to be, rather than
the "fake" that I was becoming.

In the spiritual journey is the happiness.

************************************************** *********

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

'Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Leave behind your faults and know that your past is forgiven. Lord, You have freed me to live today and allowed me to know that my future is secure in You.

Live a God-filled life and it will be only natural that you will express enthusiasm for life, joy, laughter and happiness. Lord, may the way I live always express my love for You.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

The Ties That Bind

"As long as the ties that bind us together are stronger than those that would tear us apart, all will be well."
Basic Text, p. 57

Many of us feel that without NA we would surely have died from our disease. Hence, its existence is our very lifeline. However, disunity is an occasional fact of life in Narcotics Anonymous; we must learn to respond in a constructive way to the destructive influences that sometimes arise in our fellowship. If we decide to be part of the solution instead of the problem, we are headed in the right direction.

Our personal recovery and the growth of NA is contingent upon maintaining an atmosphere of recovery in our meetings. Are we willing to help our group deal constructively with conflict? As group members, do we strive to work out difficulties openly, honestly, and fairly? Do we seek to promote the common welfare of all our members rather than our own agenda? And, as trusted servants, do we take into consideration the effect our actions might have on newcomers?

Service can bring out both the best and the worst in us. But it is often through service that we begin to get in touch with some of our more pressing defects of character Do we shrink from service commitments rather than face what we might find out about ourselves? If we bear in mind the strength of the ties that bind us together—our recovery from active addiction—all will be well.

Just for today: I will strive to be of service to our fellowship. I will be unafraid to discover who I am.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked, and jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. --James Barrie
If kisses can be made of acorn buttons, they can be made of any good thing. Think of kisses made of candy. Therefore, there must be a thousand and one ways to give a kiss. We can give one made of wild flowers picked in the ditch, the melody in a music box, the few true words in a note, or the picture we ourselves draw to give to the one we love. Think of how we can hide them here and there under pillows, in corners, in pockets where they're sure to be seen and felt. Think of how hearts kiss when we hug or hold hands, how sleeping beauties suddenly wake up.
Does it matter that we try new ways to show our same old love?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
It is a cheap generosity, which promises the future in compensation for the present. --J. A. Spender
Living in this moment is all we really have. We are constantly bombarded with advice to live for the future, but it perpetually exists beyond our grasp like the carrot tempting the donkey. We are told to be mindful of our career paths, to save for the future, and to sacrifice now for later rewards. We put off spending time with our children, but later they are no longer the same children. We postpone seeing friends now and discover later that we have lost our relationships.
Of course, we can't be foolish about our future. We need to make some plans and delay some immediate pleasures. But for now, we can only have a rapport with others and ourselves and experience life in this moment. The present is the only time when anything can happen, any change can occur. This moment is like a fresh, cool breeze. The rest exists only in our imaginations or memories.
May I feel the exhilaration of being alive in this moment and maintain a balance in my perspective today.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Trusting Ourselves
What a great gift we've been given - ourselves. To listen to ourselves, to trust instinct and intuition, is to pay tribute to that gift.
What a disservice not to heed the leadings and leanings that so naturally arise from within. When will we learn that these leadings and leanings draw us into God's rich plan for us?
We will learn. We will learn by listening, trusting, and following through. What is it time to do?... What do I need to do to take care of myself?... What am I being led to do?... What do I know?
Listen, and we will know. Listen to the voice within.
Today, I will listen and trust. I will be helped to take action when that is needed. I can trust God and myself.


Fill your world with color and Beauty
Fill your life and your world with the colors, textures, scents, and objects that are beautiful to you, that have meaning to you.
Remember that we are connected to our environment.
The objects and the colors in our world have energy and meaning. They have an impact on us.
The more we see how connected we are, the more carefully and thoughtfully we may want o choose the items we place in our home, or our space at work, if we have a special area, because these objects and colors can reflect how we feel about ourselves and what is important to us.
Objects have energy. They have energy already in them when we obtain them, and they have the energy and meaning we attribute to them. Choose carefully the possessions you want around you, for they tell a story all day long.
Fill your world, your life, with objects that are beautiful and have special meaning to you. What articles and hues have you surrounded yourself with at home, at work? Is there a special article you want close to you, on your desk, in your locker, in your pocket?
What story do these things tell about you, about what you're going through, about your place in your journey? --Melody Beattie


Today my faith and confidence grow as I learn to accept all that I discover without judgment. I feel energy and life flow through me with this new freedom. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey To The Heart

Don’t Let People Put Thoughts in Your Head

Respect the power of words and thoughts, both your own and others’.

Our ideas and inspirations sometimes come from other people, come from outside us. But if we’re not careful, it’s easy for others to put their ideas and intentions into our minds, to cast their spells on us. You aren’t very creative. Your heart isn’t open. You’re really not that healthy. You need me to succeed. You don’t deserve success. In fact, you don’t deserve… How easy it is to be unaware of the process, to walk around with other people’s words in your head, taking them as truth, taking them as our own, letting their ideas about us control our lives and our beliefs.

We don’t have to let others put their spells on us. We don’t have to believe what they say.

What are the words others have spoken to you, the spells they’ve cast on you and your life? What phrases are echoing in your mind, and who do they belong to? Listen to what you hear, and if they are not yours, get them out.

Words are powerful. Don’t let other people put them in your head. And choose carefully the words you speak to them.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

You’re not alone

I felt a searing pain in my heart. It was physical– I swear it was– when that nurse asked me if I had someone I could call. Over the next few days at the hospital, I was surrounded by people, but at no previous time in my life had I ever felt this isolated and alone. I knew that the path I was about to walk, I had to walk alone.

Larer, another nurse walked over to me. She looked straight into my eyes. “It’s going to be difficult, harder than you can imagine,” she said. “And it’ll take about eight years. But you can do it. You’ll come through. I know. I lost a child,too. My daughter was nine when she died.”

There are places in our lives that we’re called to go alone. People can surround us, call us, and offer support. But the journey we’re about to take is solely and uniquely ours. People can watch us, reach out to us, and even say they know how it feels. But the world we’re entering is ours, and ours alone.

Slowly, as we walk this path that life has thrust on us, we begin to see the outline of a few faces– way out in the distance, waving to us, cheering us on. As we continue along the path, the faces and forms fill in. Before long, we see that we’re in the midst of a large, large group. Where did all these people come from? we wonder. I thought I was alone.

No matter what path you’re on, others have walked it before you, and some will follow you there. Each step you take is uniquely yours, but you are never, never alone.

While many experiences are isolated and uniquely ours, we’re simultaneously part of a collecive force. What we go through and what we do matters– sometimes much more than we know.

God, help me know how much you care. No matter what I’m going through, help me see the other faces along the way.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

We sometimes hear someone say, “He is standing in his own light,” A mental picture then clearly reveals that many of us tend to shadow our own happiness by mistaken thinking. Let us learn to stand aside so the light can shine on us and all we do. For only then can we see ourselves and our circumstances with true clarity With The Program and the Twelves Steps, we no longer need to stand in our own light and try alone to solve our problems in dearness. When I am faced with a seemingly insoluble problem, will I ask myself if I am standing in my own light?

Today I Pray

May I not get in my own way, obscure my own clarity of thought, stumble over my own feet, block my own doorway to recovery. If I find that I am standing in my own light, may I ask my Higher Power and my friends in the group to show me a new vantage point.

Today I Will Remember

If all I an see is my shadow, I’m in my own light.

****************************************

One More Day

Joy waits for no man.
–Tanhuma

Joyfulness is one of God’s greatest gifts. Joy transcends all time and place. Joy causes unmeasurable and often indescribable feelings which we might only have for a fleeting moment. Joy is like opening a special present. It is a state of mind, a frame of reference for future memories.

While we may quite easily recognize the joy of watching an exquisite sunset, we forget too often that it is natural that its beauty changes, dims, and then disappears within moments. And this is true of many of our joy-filled experiences — they change, they dim, and often they disappear. Joy does not always stay with us, so we need to make the most of it when it is upon us — in a sunset, child’s hug, or a friend’s offered hand.

To live life to the fullest, I am open to those special moments of joy, even if they don’t last forever.

************************************

Food For Thought

Being Honest

During our compulsive overeating careers, many of us have been dishonest with others about what we were eating. Some of us have been closet eaters and some of us have stolen food. Most of us have eaten more when we were alone than when we were with other people.

We have almost surely been dishonest with ourselves, too. How many times have we promised ourselves to stick to a diet, only to find ourselves cheating a short time later? We tell ourselves that one small bite won't make any difference, when deep down we know that we intend to eat many more bites than one.

When we take inventory, and as our insights are sharpened, we may discover other areas besides eating where we have not been honest with ourselves.

The OA program gives us a chance to practice rigorous honesty, especially with ourselves. The light from our Higher Power will gradually clear away our confusion and darkness.

May I not be afraid to know the truth.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

ADMITTING MISTAKES

"A man should never be ashamed
to own he has been in the wrong,
which is but saying, in other words,
that he is wiser today than he was yesterday."
Alexander Pope

Most of my life I had spent in blaming others for all the bad things that happened in my life, and I never learned to take responsibilty for my part in anything. I thought that life had treated me unfairly, but mostly it was because someone else had wronged me. I wallowed in self pity and justifiable anger, and not surprisingly, I found comfort in food so I could get through the pain of being treated so badly by others.

When I came into the program and began working the steps, I was horrified to learn that I was expected to do a searching and fearless inventory of my wrongdoings, for after all wasn't it others who had harmed me and not the other way around? Slowly I realised that I had a part to play in all the events in my life, and that only by clearing up the wreckage of my past and keeping my side of the street clean, did I have any hope of recovery. I had to swallow my pride and admit when I was wrong, and when I did that, miracles began to happen. Instead of feeling hard done by and bad about myself as I had thought I would, the exact opposite happened, and I started on a journey of growth and increasing self esteem that never ceases to surprise me. When I am able to admit that I'm wrong and apologise for my part in any conflict or misunderstanding, without expectation of anything back from the other person, I strengthen my recovery in this program.

One day at a time ...
I will admit my mistakes whether I believe that the fault is mine or not, because that is the way that I grow in my recovery.
Sharon

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

This is the how and why of it. First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn't work. - Pg. 62 - How It Works

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Life is not fair. You see it in the headlines; you see it in people racked with chronic pain; you see it in senseless street violence and children starving in third world countries. It will be a challenge for you in the coming weeks to understand it is not an unfair thing that has just happened, addiction and then recovery, but the greatest fight you shall ever receive.

Creator, I do not know why good people suffer addiction. For if it is the very act of not understanding and still trusting in the good of the universe, that comprises the very essence of faith.

Silver Linings

I search for silver linings, for the deeper meaning of events in my life. I will look for the lesson. When life offers up its inevitable challenges, I will try to understand what I am meant to see that I am not seeing, what I am meant to hear that I am not hearing. There is always a silver lining if I look for it. Even if I don't see it readily, I trust that it is there and that it will reveal itself to me over time. Life isn't simple. One of the ways that I can have a better experience is to see what is positive, about a given situation, to look for the silver lining. I can grow in joy and in pain. It doesn't need to be one or the other because pain can transform into joy. It can be the fire that clears the the field for new and tender growth.

There is always a silver lining

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

As a general rule, questions that ask 'why' go in the wrong direction, seeking explanations that blame and shame. Questions that begin with 'How' and 'What' as in 'How do I start my Fourth?' and 'What can I learn from this?' lead to solutions, where the light bulb goes on in your head.

I ask questions that lead to exclamations not explanations.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Acceptance: Life is 10% what you make it and 90% how you take it

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today my faith and confidence grow as I learn to accept all that I discover without judgment. I feel energy and life flow through me with this new freedom.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Alcohol is a great remover. It removes stains, inhibitions, worries, jobs, families, freedom, choices, dignity, livers, - and lives. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

February 14

Daily Reflections

EXPECTATIONS vs. DEMANDS

Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that
he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition
is that he trust in God and clean house.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 98

Dealing with expectations is a frequent topic at
meetings. It isn't wrong to expect progress of myself,
good things from life, or decent treatment from others.
Where I get into trouble is when my expectations become
demands. I will fall short of what I wish to be and
situations will go in ways I do not like, because
people will let me down sometimes. The only question
is: "What am I going to about it?" Wallow in self-pity
or anger; retaliate and make a bad situation worse; or
will I trust in God's power to bring blessings on the
messes in which I find myself? Will I ask Him what I
should be learning; do I keep on doing the right things
I know how to do, no matter what; do I take the time to
share my faith and blessings with others?

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

After that first drink, we had a single track mind. It
was like a railroad train. The first drink started it
off and it kept going on the single track until it got
to the end of the line, drunkenness. We knew this would
happen when we sat down at a bar to have the first drink,
but still we couldn't keep away from liquor. Our will-power
was gone. We had become helpless and hopeless before the
power of alcohol. It's not the second drink or the tenth
drink that does the damage. It's the first drink. Will I ever
take that first drink again?

Meditation For The Day

I must keep a time apart with God every day. Gradually I
will be transformed mentally and spiritually. It is not the
praying so much as just being in God's presence. The
strengthening and curative powers of this I cannot
understand, but I can experience them. The poor, sick
world would be cured if every day each soul waited before
God for the inspiration to live aright. My greatest
spiritual growth occurs in this time apart with God.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may faithfully keep a quiet time apart with
God. I pray that I may grow spiritually each day.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Our Companions, p. 45

Today, the vast majority of us welcome any new light that can be
thrown on the alcoholic's mysterious and baffling malady. We
welcome new and valuable knowledge whether it is issues from a test
tube, from a psychiatrist's couch, or from revealing social studies. We
are glad of any kind of education that accurately informs the public
and changes its age-old attitude toward the drunk.

More and more we regard all who labor in the total field of alcoholism
as our companions on a march from darkness into light. We see that
we can accomplish together what we could never accomplish in
separation and in rivalry.

Grapevine, March 1958

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Releasing the Past_____ Living in the Present.
Some of us waste time brooding over past failures and lost opportunities. Since the past is beyond our reach, we can't change anything that happened. We do, however, have the power to change the way we view the present. We can begin by realizing that our past troubles really may have been valuable lessons.
We can also get a better perspective by releasing the idea that anything from the past controls our future. The real meaning of the saying "with God, all things are possible" is that our Higher Power can transform anything that happened in our past. AA has had its share of miraculous changes that came to people who seemingly had lost all hope. These changes have included miraculous restorations in health, finances, and relationships.
A new saying is that something or some person who bothered us in the past is history, as far as we're concerned. Let's put history where it belongs__ on the shelves and away from our daily thinking and activities.
I can be a new person today and every day. The past cannot control or limit me, but I do benefit from its lessons.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Some things have to be believed to be seen. --Ralph Hodgson
In recovery, we learn to trust. We trust that our Higher Power is on our side. Maybe we can't see our Higher Power , but once we start trusting things change. Step Two says, "Came to believe. . . " Once we come to believe, we start to see our Higher Power working in many ways. We make new program friends. We find new peace. Our family and friends trust us again. Life won't always be fair. We won't get all we want. But we'll find the love and care we need. If we're open to believing in love, the easy times will be easier and the harder times a bit softer. Do I believe in love?
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me believe, especially when times are hard. Help me not blame You for the hard times.
Action for the Day: I will write what I believe the program and my Higher Power want for me.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Friendship of a kind that cannot easily be reversed tomorrow must have its roots in common interests and shared beliefs. --Barbara W. Tuchman
The gift of friendship has been extended to each of us sharing this program. Our interest is common: we want to stay abstinent. And we share the belief that a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. We trust our commitment to one another here. We are learning to live the program's principles in all our affairs.
In years gone by, friendships were often missing from our lives. We had a friend, here and there, certainly, but could she really be trusted - with our secrets, with our spouse? An overriding fear and one not without reason. It's likely that we, too, failed to be good friends. Friendship, anytime, means risking vulnerability. It means making a decision to be trustworthy. And it means not backing away from either, anytime.
Friendships so enrich our lives; they complete us. The experiences shared among friends give us all an edge on living. It is no accident that we have been drawn here together. What we have will help another.
I must be willing to give away my intimate self to my sisters in trust. My strength as a woman recovering will increase as my ties of friendship increase.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

Imagine life without faith! Were nothing left but pure reason, it wouldn’t be life. But we believed in life—of course we did. We could not prove life in the sense that you can prove a straight line is the shortest distance between two points, yet, there it was. Could we still say the whole thing was nothing but a mass of electrons, created out of nothing, meaning nothing, whirling on to a destiny of nothingness? Or course we couldn’t. The electrons themselves seemed more intelligent than that. At least, so the chemist said.

p. 54

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories

Jim's Story

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

I worked in the steel mill for possibly two months, and then I became disgusted with myself and decided to go back home. I think the thing that galled me was that just after Easter I had drawn my salary for two weeks' work and had decided that I was going to send some money to Vi; and above all else was going to send my baby daughter an Easter outfit. But there happened to be a liquor store between the post office and the mill, and i stopped to ge that one drink. Of course, the kid never got the Easter outfit. I got very little out of the two hundred that I drew on that payday.

pp. 241-242

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Two - "For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority - a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience."

Growing pains now beset the group. Panhandlers panhandle. Lonely hearts pine. Problems descend like an avalanche. Still more important, murmurs are heard in the body politic, which swell into a loud cry: "Do these oldtimers think they can run this group forever? Let's have an election!" The founder and his friends are hurt and depressed. They rush from crisis to crisis and from member to member, pleading; but it's no use, the revolution is on. The group conscience is about to take over.

pp. 133-134

************************************************** *********

If you keep falling in the same hole, go down a different road.

It is not easy to straighten in the oak the crook that grew in the sapling. --American Proverb

"Silence is one of the hardest things to refute." --Josh Billings

Little deeds of kindness, little words of love, help to make earth happy like the heaven above. --Julia A. Fletcher Carney

Faith is not only a belief and a feeling, it is an action. Action, really does speak louder than words. --Shelley

Let us dedicate ourselves to peace within ourselves, that wherever we go, we bring peace and we learn to find peace in all things. --John Morton

God treasures each of us as a rare and lovely flower. --Patricia Bellah

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

LOVE

"Let there be spaces in your
togetherness."
-- Kahlil Gibran

As an alcoholic I demanded love and was possessive of others. I had a
selfish love that treated people as "things" --- for my own
satisfaction and survival. I was claustrophobic in my affection and
smothered any creative love; my fear of being alone made me
blackmail people with my needs and emotions.

Today I can love people while still allowing them to breathe. An
important part of my program is detachment; I take responsibility for
me and I allow others to take responsibility for themselves. I give the
people I love space.

Sometimes I need to love a person enough to let them go. Spiritually I
am beginning to understand that in order to be free, I must give
freedom to others.

God, in the "spaces" of my love is the growth experienced.

************************************************** *********

Praise God in His sanctuary; praise Him in the mighty heavens. Psalm 150:1

"Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles." Isaiah 40:31

See what love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; and that is what we are. 1 John 3:1

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Don't ever grow too old for your birthdays or give up on your dreams. Lord, help me to know where You are leading me today and face this adventure with excitement.

Never let what you can't do get in the way of what you can do. Lord, help me to recognize my abilities and focus only on my strengths so that each day I will get nearer to my goals.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Honesty And Spirituality

"The right to a God of your understanding is total and without any catches. Because we have this right, it is necessary to be honest about our belief if we are to grow spiritually"

Basic Text, p. 25

In meetings, over refreshments, in talks with our sponsor, we hear our NA friends talking about the way they understand their Higher Power. It would be easy to "go with the flow;" adopting someone else's beliefs. But just as no one else can recover for us, so no one else's spirituality can substitute for our own. We must honestly search for an understanding of God that truly works for us.

Many of us begin that search with prayer and meditation, and continue with our experiences in recovery. Have there been instances where we have been given power beyond our own to face life's challenges? When we have quietly sought direction in times of trouble, have we found it? What kind of Power do we believe has guided and strengthened us? What kind of Power do we seek? With the answers to these questions, we will understand our Higher Power well enough to feel safe and confident about asking it to care for our will and lives.

A borrowed understanding of God may do on a short haul. But in the long run, we must come to our own understanding of a Higher Power, for it is that Power which will carry us through our recovery.

Just for today: I seek a Power greater than myself that can help me grow spiritually. Today, I will examine my beliefs honestly and come to my own understanding of God.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Love cures people--both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it. --Karl Menninger
Receiving a loving hug from a parent or perhaps a smile from a friend or even a stranger gives us a special feeling inside. We know we are important to others when they show us their love through attention. And we sometimes forget that we matter to others. Family members and friends feel good in the same way when we show them our love. Everyone needs to be loved.
How can we show our love? Must it be through a hug? Doing a favor for someone is loving. Helping around the house or the yard is loving, particularly when we've volunteered our help. Giving an unexpected gift to a friend is a way of showing love. Showing others we care, even when they are angry, is perhaps the nicest of all expressions of love.
What new way can I show someone I care today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The less able I am to believe in our epoch and the more arid and depraved mankind seems in my eyes, the less I look to revolution as the remedy and the more I believe in the magic of love. --Hermann Hesse
Men have been more likely to look outward than inward for solutions to problems. Yet this program is changing us from within. As we come to terms with ourselves, as we learn to be in relationships with friends and family, the same picture that looked so dismal in past years may look full of possibilities and even rich in the present. The love we feel toward others and the love we receive change our perceptions.
We need not expect all relationships to be alike. One friend may be wonderful as a recreational buddy, but perhaps we wouldn't talk about everything in our life with him. Another friend is comfortable and we can be ourselves with him, although he may not challenge us to grow or change. No friendship, no spouse, no one person can be enough in our life. But as a group they sustain and enrich us. We need the love and contact with them all.
I am thankful for love, which gives meaning and hope to life.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Valentine's Day
For children, Valentine's Day means candy hearts, silly cards, and excitement in the air.
How different Valentine's Day can be for us as adults. The Love Day can be a symbol that we have not yet gotten love to work for us as we would like.
Or it can be a symbol of something different, something better. We are in recovery now. We have begun the healing process. Our most painful relationships, we have learned, have assisted us on the journey to healing, even if they did little more than point out our own issues or show us what we don't want in our life.
We have started the journey of learning to love ourselves. We have started the process of opening our heart to love, real love that flows from us, to others, and back again. Do something loving for yourself. Do something loving and fun for your friends, for your children, or for anyone you choose.
It is the Love Day. Wherever we are in our healing process, we can have as much fun with it as we choose. Whatever our circumstances, we can be grateful that our heart is opening to love.
I will open myself to the love available to me from people, the Universe, and my Higher Power today. I will allow myself to give and receive the love I want today. I am grateful that my heart is healing, that I am learning to love.


I am beginning to actually feel the energy of love that I have inside. My entire being is in the process of being transformed with love. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey to the Heart

Send Love Letters

Sending love letters to people we care about is a rewarding experience, both for us and for them. Making the time to take pen in hand and express our thoughts is valuable. But there’s another way to send love letters,too. This way takes as much time and attention as writing a loving note does, but it doesn’t require a pen and paper. It requires concentrated thought.

There’s an invisible thread of energy winding through the universe, one that connects us all. Have you ever noticed that sometimes you can tell if someone’s angry or upset with you, even if you haven’t talked to or seen this person? You can feel his or her anger, even if you haven’t been physically present to experience it. Thoughts have power, particularly those charged with intense emotional energy. When we think mean, bitter thoughts, it can be like sending hate mail along our connecting wires. It can almost be a sensory attack.

Why not send loving thoughts charged with positive emotional energy? We can consciously choose to use our connections to others to send love. Send positive thoughts. Blessings. Peace. Assistance in time of crisis. We can send our thoughts in the form of a prayer, or we can simply think a blessing or positive thought, charge it with energy, and send it along the wires with love.

When someone you know or love comes to mind, or even someone you don’t– perhaps someone in another part of the country or the world, perhaps someone going through a particular crisis– and you’re not certain what to do, send a love letter. Your loving thoughts will touch them and your blessings will all come back to you.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Say woohoo because there’s hope

The doorbell rang one day. I was slumping about in the big house I had just purchased in Minnesota. It was going to be the dream home for the children and me. The problem was, Shane had been killed the day after I closed the deal. Now Nichole and I were rambling around wondering what to do.

I answered the door. The FedEx man asked me to sign for a delivery. I did. And he handed me a large cardboard box. I brought it into the living room and put it down without opening it up. I didn’t get excited about much of anything back then. I was sad and angry. People, my readers, said they liked my writing because it gave them hope. The problem was, I didn’t have any of that hope for myself. I couldn’t see how life could or would ever make any kind of sense again. The one thing I wanted– my son alive and well, and my family intact– would not ever come to pass.

One day I got around to opening that big cardboard box. I took a knife, sliced it down the center, and looked at what was inside. It was filled with stuffed animals. A big green parrot with a fuzzy beak was sitting on top. There were monkeys, bears, and assorted things. They didn’t look brand new, but they were happy, cheerful little things. I took out the card and read the note inside. This is what it said.

“I make my living out of taking all the stuffed animals that people throw away. Then I take them home and clean them up. I guess I like doing it just to prove a point,” the woman wrote. “Sometimes, we start thinking something’s no good anymore, so we throw it in the trash. Sometimes we throw things away too quickly, but all they really need is a little tender, loving care to bring them back to life. I heard about your son’s death. I thought maybe getting a box of my reborn animals might help.”

Many years have passed since then. I’ve gotten rid of a lot of my possessions, especially when I moved from Minnesota to California in 1994. But one of the things I’ve held on to– in fact he’s still sitting in this room with me next to my desk– is that happy green parrot with the big fuzzy beak.

He’s a gentle reminder that even something as broken and scaggly as I was can be brought back to life again. Some things in life are true, whether we believe them or not.

Hope is one of those things.

Even if you have to say it in disbelief, say woohoo.

God, help me believe in me as much as you do. Thanks for getting me through those tough spots when I lose my faith.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Today I will take the time to list the positive aspects of my new life and the blessings that accompany the miracle of my recovery. I will be grateful for the seemingly simple ability to eat normally, to fall asleep with a feeling of contentment, to awaken with a gladness to be alive. I will be grateful for the ability to face life on life’s terms — with peace of mind, self-respect, and full possession of all my faculties. On a daily basis, do I count my blessings? Do I seek through prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with God as I understand Him?

Today I Pray

On this day of love-giving,may I count all the good things in my life and give thanks for them. May I take no blessing for granted, including the beating of my own heart and the fresh feel of new air as I breathe.

Today I Will Remember

To count — and consider — my blessings.

****************************************
One More Day

We don’t love qualities, we love persons..

.–Jacques Maritain

No matter what happens to us in our lifetime, regardless of whether we are rich or poor,m strong or weak, ill or well, we always have room for love. Unqualified love and caring cost nothing. Despite our financial position, allowing ourselves to love, allowing ourselves to be loved strengthens and lends greater value to our lives.

In loving others and in being loved, we’re reminded that people, not events or even characteristics, are th important elements of our lives. We don’t look for perfection in our loved ones, and we’re freed of the notion that we must earn another’s love. Love balances our lives; it helps us keep sight of our values and priorities.

I will remember today that I love people for themselves, not for their potential. The love I receive is given just as freely.

************************************

Food For Thought

Satisfaction

When we were overeating, we thought mainly about trying to satisfy ourselves. The more we ate, the more we wanted to eat. The more we ate, the less satisfied we were. We finally realized that satisfaction was not to be found by consuming more and more food.

When we stopped overeating, we suddenly had much more time and energy available for constructive activities. We began to contribute more to our families, our jobs, our recreation. We found new areas where we could be of service to others.

Because OA has given us so much, we in turn are able to share with our groups. As we give to others, we receive self-satisfaction as a by-product. This is a much more powerful satisfaction than we ever found in the refrigerator!

For each of us, serving and contributing to the best of our abilities means abstaining. Without abstinence, we can never be satisfied.

Thank You for opportunities to give and for the satisfaction of abstinence.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

OZ

"Oz never did give nothing to the Tin Man
That he didn't, didn't already have."
Tin Man
Written by Dewey Bunnell, ©1974

These are simple words, and at first glance look like a song from the 'Wizard of Oz.’ However, to me they are complex and have deep meaning.

I have a body, a mind and a spirit; yet for the better part of my growing-up years I thought I had a flaw. I never felt complete and kept searching for whatever-it-was that would make me whole and fix me. I had no idea I was looking in the wrong places; but the real problem was I didn't know what I was looking for.

I never knew how to just 'be' without expecting some kind of negative feedback or teasing or criticism or uncertainty in return. Because I never felt good enough, I learned to 'not be' and to make myself invisible emotionally while eating, and in later years eating and purging.

Coming to OA was like surfacing for air after staying under water too long. People who didn’t know me understood and supported me. I slowly opened up and shared at meetings and did service and stopped hiding, and the void created with food and loneliness began to fill with hugs and support and recovery.

Today I have a Program with wonderful friends who reinforce I am OK as I am. God gave me and continues to give me what I need - physically (help with my food plan), emotionally and spiritually. The miracles in my life keep coming when I least expect them and only when I turn them over to God. Each new miracle and blessing nourishes me.

I began writing professionally again; writing is my passion, and my disease stole it from me. My spirit is happy, and I am grateful to my loving friend who had confidence and faith in me.

One day at a time ...
I am discovering my emerging identity was inside me all the time.
Janie

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience and entire psychic change there is little hope of his recovery. - Pg. XXIX - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Under stress men are more likely to do the 'fight or flight' thing and counter stress with anger or desertion. Women are more likely to adopt the 'tend and befriend' mode where they begin to nurture others and make alliances. You will be adopting a number of strategies in your growing recovery. Try to make as many of them proactive as you can. The more you respond ( with thought and deliberation ) then react ( instinctively ), the better you will weather the journey.

I seek solutions and guidelines for my behaviors and the coming decisions I must make. I do not 'react' but 'respond' to the situations in my life.

The Power is in the Now

I recognize that the present is alive and vibrant and creative. All of the creative power of this alive and radiant universe is in the present, in the here and now. If I align myself with the present, if I allow myself to fully experience this moment, I will find all I need in it. There is magic in this moment, there is beauty and vibrancy in it that resonates throughout my life. What I experience now, creates my future.

There is nothing like the present

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Sometimes you are the wind; sometimes you are the bug; sometimes you are the windshield.

Experience is what I get when I don't get what I want.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

When we use, addiction makes all our decisions.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I am beginning to actually feel the energy of love that I have inside. My entire being is in the process of being transformed with love.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Don't point the finger, reach out the hand. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

February 15

Daily Reflections

TAKING ACTION

Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are
being fulfilled among us--sometimes quickly, sometimes
slowly. They will always materialize if we work for
them.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84

One of the most important things A.A. has given me, in
addition to freedom from booze, is the ability to take
"right action." It says the promises will ALWAYS
materialize if I WORK for them. Fantasizing about them,
debating them, preaching about them and faking them
just won't work. I'll remain a miserable, rationalizing
dry drunk. By taking action and working the Twelve Steps
in all my affairs, I'll have a life beyond my wildest
dreams.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

If alcoholism were just a physical allergy, like asthma
or hay fever, it would be easy for us, by taking a skin
test with alcohol, to find out whether or not we're
alcoholics. But alcoholism is not just a physical allergy.
It's also a mental allergy or obsession. After we've
become alcoholics, we can still tolerate alcohol physically
for quite a while, although we suffer a little more after
each binge and each time it takes a little longer to get
over our hangovers. Do I realize that since I have become
an alcoholic, I cannot tolerate alcohol mentally at all?

Meditation For The Day

The world does not need super-men or women, but super-natural
people. People who will persistently turn the self out of their lives
and let Divine Power work through them. Let inspiration
take the place of aspiration. Seek to grow spiritually,
rather than to acquire fame and riches. Our chief ambition
should be to be used by God. The Divine Force is sufficient
for all the spiritual work in the world. God only needs the
instruments for His use. His instruments can remake
the world.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be an instrument of the Divine Power.
I pray that I may do my share in remaking the world.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

True Ambition--and False, p. 46

We have had a much keener look at ourselves and those about us. We
have seen that we were prodded by unreasonable fears or anxieties
into making a life business of winning fame, money, and what we
thought was leadership. So false pride became the reverse side of that
ruinous coin marked "Fear." We simply had to be Number One
people to cover up our deep-lying inferiorities.

<< << << >> >> >>

True ambition is not what we thought it was. True ambition is the
profound desire to live usefully and walk humbly under the grace of
God.

12 & 12
1. p. 123
2. pp. 124-125

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

AA is an Automatic Sprinkler System
Emotional Emergencies
Wise managers install automatic sprinkler systems to protect their businesses. The system's great value is that it goers into action during the first few minutes of a fire, before it gets out of control. This gives the fire department precious time to arrive and put the fire out.
Our AA program gives us something like a sprinkler system. We never know when the flames of resentment might leap up, seemingly out of nowhere. If we've been working our program, something takes over automatically to begin dealing with resentment.
This gives us time to bring more of our valuable spiritual tools into use. Knowing that resentment is burning away, we can try one thing and then another until it is brought to rest. Perhaps we will try prayer. We might also discuss our problem with a close friend or sponsor. Maybe we'll attend a meeting and lay the mater out for the group attention. We may help somebody, even in a small way. An amazing healing of resentment can come from any helpful action. Even a simple action like helping a person in a stalled automobile can work wonders in deflecting the pain of ongoing resentment.
I need not fear the sudden appearance of resentment if I have been following my program.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Easy Does It.---Twelve Steps slogan
We are people who push ourselves to hard. We try to be perfect. Well, we need to lighten up. Easy Does It.
We need to slow down our pace. Why? Because our program teaches us to give up trying to be perfect.
We begin to love ourselves for who we are. We are enough. Over and over we hear this as we live the Steps. It's the message of God's love. Our Higher Power want us to live at a pace that's not fast and hard, so we always know we're loved. Remember, we've turned our life over to the care of God. And our life is a wonderful gift. As recovering people, we may know better than others.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me to live at Your pace, not mine. Help me keep in mind that life isn't a race. It's a spiritual journey. Walk with me.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll take two hours just to relax and do loving things for myself. I'll take time to count my blessings.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Fortuitous circumstances constitute the moulds that shape the majority of human lives. --Augusta Evans
Being in the right place at the right time is how we generally explain our good fortune or the good fortune of a friend. But it's to our advantage to understand how we managed to be in the right place at just the right moment.
We have probably heard many times at meetings that God's timetable is not necessarily the same as our timetable. That events will happen as scheduled to fit a picture bigger than the picture encompassed by our egos. And frequently our patience wears thin because we aren't privy to God's timetable. But we can trust, today and always, that doors open on time. Opportunities are offered when we are ready for them. Nary a moment passes that doesn't invite us to both give and receive a special message--a particular lesson. We are always in God's care, and every circumstance of our lives is helping to mold the women we are meant to be.
I will take a long look at where I am today and be grateful for my place. It's right for me, now, and is preparing me for the adventure ahead.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

WE AGNOSTICS

Hence, we saw that reason isn’t everything. Neither is reason, as most of us use it, entirely dependable, thought it emanate from our best minds. What about people who proved that man could never fly?
Yet we had been seeing another kind of flight, a spiritual liberation from this world, people who rose above their problems. They said God made these things possible, and we only smiled. We had seen spiritual release, but liked to tell ourselves it wasn’t true.

pp. 54-55

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories

This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people.

I knew I wasn't capable of keeping the bulk of the money myself, so I gave it to a white fellow who owned the bar I frequented. He kept the money for me, but I worried him to death for it. Finally, I broke the last one hundred dollar bill the Saturday before I left. I got out of that bill one pair of shoes, and the rest of that money was blown. I took the last of it to buy my railroad ticket.

p. 242

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Two - "For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority - a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience."

Now comes the election. If the founder and his friends have served well, they may - to their surprise - be reinstated for a time. If, however, they have heavily resisted the rising tide of democracy, they may be summarily beached. In either case, the group now has a so-called rotating committee, very sharply limited in its authority. In no sense whatever can its members govern or direct the group. They are servants. Theirs is the sometimes thankless privilege of doing the group's chores. Headed by the chairman, they look after public relations and arrange meetings. Their treasurer, strictly accountable, takes money from the hat that is passed, banks it, pays the rent and other bills, and makes a regular report at business meetings. The secretary sees that literature is on the table, looks after the phone-answering service, answers the mail, and sends out notices of meetings. Such are the simple services that enable the group to function. the committee gives no spiritual advice, judges no one's conduct, issues no orders. Every one of them may be promptly eliminated at the next election if they try this. And so they make the belated discovery that they are really servants, not senators. These are universal experiences. Thus throughout A.A. does the group conscience decree the terms upon which its leaders shall serve.

p. 134

************************************************** *********

We are responsible for the effort, not the outcome.

Better the foot slip than the tongue. --French Proverb

"The walls we build around us to keep out the sadness also keep out the joy." --Jim Rohn

"You must look into people, as well as at them." --Lord Chesterfield

God, help me recognize that I am a part of your creation and don't need to fight it. Help me live in peace and celebration of life. --Melody Beattie

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

HUMILITY

"I am a man; nothing human is
alien to me."
-- Terence

Humility is not so much about trying to be "good" as accepting that I
am imperfect. For too long I thought that humility was "keeping the
peace", appearing to be "perfect", bottling up my anger and
resentments --- living a life of "people-pleasing".

Today I understand that humility is being real. It is accepting my
humanity and being honest in my relationships. Humility is respecting
the lives of others but also respecting my own. Humility is seeking to
reveal that divinity that God has given to my life. Humility is knowing
that in the lives of my fellow man --- the good and the bad --- is me.

Master, let me have the humility to be real.

************************************************** *********

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me." John 14:1

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:6-5

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Hide your troubles and disappointments and you will find that they grow much smaller from neglect. Lord, help me to direct my focus so that I can make a difference today with a smile and a kind word.

Prayer may not always change a situation, but it will always change us. Lord, I accept Your answers to my prayers because I know that they will always be right and, in Your wisdom, best for me.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

An Awakening Of The Spirit

"The last thing we expected was an awakening of the spirit"

Basic Text, p. 48

Few of us came to our first Narcotics Anonymous meeting aching to take a personal inventory or believing that a spiritual void existed in our souls. We had no inkling that we were about to embark on a journey which would awaken our sleeping spirits.

Like a loud alarm clock, the First Step brings us to semiconsciousness—although at this point, we may not be sure whether we want to climb out of bed or maybe sleep for just five more minutes. The gentle hand shaking our shoulders as we apply the Second and Third Steps causes us to stand up, stretch, and yawn. We need to wipe the sleep from our eyes to write the Fourth Step and share our Fifth. But as we work the Sixth, Seventh, Eighth, and Ninth Steps, we begin noticing a spring in our step and the start of a smile on our lips. Our spirits sing in the shower as we take the Tenth and Eleventh Steps. And then we practice the Twelfth, leaving the house in search of others to awaken.

We don't have to spend the rest of our lives in a spiritual coma. We may not like to get up in the morning but, once out of bed, we're almost always glad we did.

Just for today: To awaken my sleepy spirit, I will use the Twelve Steps.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
It is always a mistake not to close one's eyes, whether to forgive or to look better into oneself. --Maurice Maeterlinck
It is easy to look outward and find faults with the world and people around us. We criticize family members or complain about our friends. We always notice disease in the trees around us.
But if we take time to be quiet, to sit alone in a tree or by a lake, we become more aware of how connected we are to the life around us. We are part of the beauty and the imperfection. When we notice our own tree is not perfect, it becomes easier to forgive the blights of those around us. It is also important to forgive ourselves our faults. Though all the trees are beautiful, they each have their scars. Being human means we are, like all humanity, both beautiful and imperfect.
Will I see through the flaws to anther's beauty today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If I truly showed my feelings, the other guys would eat me alive. It's too dog eat dog out there to be honest about the things that really count to you. You can't leave yourself wide open like that. --Michael E. McGill
As we deepen our commitment to strong and mature manhood, we see a conflict between this program and much of what we learned as young men. When we drop our defenses and are honest, we take the chance of getting hurt. Many of us learned long ago that when we became vulnerable, others became abusive. It is difficult to abandon everything we learned about being nobody's fool and staying safe.
In fact, we don't have to leave ourselves wide open. We can be selective about how open we will be and whom we will trust. But for our spiritual growth to continue, we must be an open book to ourselves, to our Higher Power, and to a few friends. We must face the fear of being open to others in this program. Developing true friends is part of the change, which the program brings.
I pray for the courage to be honest with myself and to stand up for who I truly am with my friends.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Fortuitous circumstances constitute the moulds that shape the majority of human lives. --Augusta Evans
Being in the right place at the right time is how we generally explain our good fortune or the good fortune of a friend. But it's to our advantage to understand how we managed to be in the right place at just the right moment.
We have probably heard many times at meetings that God's timetable is not necessarily the same as our timetable. That events will happen as scheduled to fit a picture bigger than the picture encompassed by our egos. And frequently our patience wears thin because we aren't privy to God's timetable. But we can trust, today and always, that doors open on time. Opportunities are offered when we are ready for them. Nary a moment passes that doesn't invite us to both give and receive a special message--a particular lesson. We are always in God's care, and every circumstance of our lives is helping to mold the women we are meant to be.
I will take a long look at where I am today and be grateful for my place. It's right for me, now, and is preparing me for the adventure ahead.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Control
Sometimes, the gray days scare us. Those are the days when the old feelings come rushing back. We may feel needy, scared, ashamed, and unable to care for ourselves.
When this happens, it's hard to trust ourselves, others, the goodness of life, and the good intentions of our Higher Power. Problems seem overwhelming. The past seems senseless; the future, bleak. We feel certain the things we want in life will never happen.
In those moments, we may become convinced that things and people outside of ourselves hold the key to our happiness. That's when we may try to control people and situations to mask our pain. When these "codependent crazies" strike, others often begin to react negatively to our controlling.
When we're in a frenzied state, searching for happiness outside ourselves and looking to others to provide our peace and stability, remember this: Even if we could control things and people, even if we got what we wanted, we would still be ourselves. Our emotional state would still be in turmoil.
People and things don't stop our pain or heal us. In recovery, we learn that this is our job, and we can do it by using our resources: our Higher Power, our support systems, our recovery program, and ourselves.
Often, after we've become peaceful, trusting, and accepting, what we want comes to us - with ease and naturalness.
The sun begins to shine again. Isn't it funny, and isn't it true, how all change really does begin with us?
I can let go of things and people and my need to control today. I can deal with my feelings. I can get peaceful. I can get calm. I can get back on track and find the true key to happiness - myself. I mil remember that a gray day is just that - one gray day.


Today I will "act as if" I am worth loving. I am beginning to tell myself that I am worthy of loving myself. I will acknowledge all the good and lovable things about me. I will "act as if" until I know that it is true. --Ruth Fishel

****************************************

Journey to the Heart

Ask the Universe for Help

You have come so far. You have learned to ask for help from people when you need it. You have learned to ask God. God as you understand God, for help,too. Now you’re entering into a relationship with the universe, an active, vital, living relationship. Now you can learn to ask the universe for help as well.

Talk to the universe. Talk aloud if you can. Say: Show me, guide me, lead me, help me. This is what I want, this is what I need. Say: Show me which road to follow, where to go, and what to do. Yes, talk to people. Talk to God. They are part of the universe and world we live in. But talk aloud to the universe,too.

Then listen to your inner voice. hear what it says and trust what you hear. Answers come in many ways, from many sources, many places. But if the answer is right for you, your heart will know, and it will feel true.

Talk to the universe. Ask it for help. Then listen to your heart. Because that quiet voice, the one in your heart, is how the universe talks to you.

****************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Let a friend be there for you

I was at a carnival somewhere, sitting on a bench, eating blue cotton candy and experiencing the noise and color and the big carousel. Garishly colored horses bounced up and down, round and round, lights flashed; people whirred past. The little girl was on the verge of tears as her mother brought her up to the gate. She stalled, trying desperately to convince her mom, that no, she really didn’t want to go on the merry-go-round after all. Mom was reassuring but firm, and finally a deal was reached. Daughter would go on the big ride if her Mom would go,too.

They gave the man their tickets and walked around, the little one in awe of the multihued beasts that surrounded her. Finally, she settled on a white one with a gold mane and tail, and directed her mom to sit on the blue one next to her. Mom smiled, a little embarrassed, but complied with her daughter’s request.

Then the music started. And suddenly, they were both five years old, shrieking and laughing as their horses bounded away. I laughed,too, watching from my bench. They raced around an imaginary track through valleys, over rivers, across plains. The music screamed, the lights flashed, and for a few minutes, they could fly.

They were still laughing when the ride ended. “Again Mommy. Let’s go again!” laughed the girl excitedly. So they turned and got back in line. In letting go of her fear, that little girl was able to feel the wonder and excitement of a new experience, and in helping her daughter to overcome fear, the mother was able to recapture some of that thrill, as well. In our everyday lives, there are times when we are frightened, times when we need a friend to give us courage, and times when we can be a friend giving courage to someone else. Be grateful for those who have helped you find strength. Be grateful for the times when you have helped your friends find courage of their own.

Both sides of the coin are winners, and sometimes, experience is sweetest when shared.

God, help me reach out my hand in friendship and strength to those I meet along the way. And when I’m scared, help me give up my pride and ask a friend to stand by my side.

****************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

When I become angry, can I admit to it and state it as a fact without allowing it to build up and burst out in inappropriate ways? Pent-up anger, I’ve finally begun to learn, quickly shatters the peace of mind that’s so critical to my on-going recovery. When I become enraged and lose control, I unwittingly handover control to the person, place, or thing with which I am enraged. When I’m angry will I tr to remember that I am endangering myself? Will I “count to ten” by calling a friend in The Program and say the Serenity Prayer aloud?

Today I Pray

May I recognize angry feelings and let them out a little a time, stating my anger as a fat, instead of allowing it to fester into rage and explode uncontrollable.

Today I Will Remember

Anger is. Rage need not be.

****************************************

One More Day

Reality is a staircase going neither up nor down, we don’t move, today is today, always is today.
–Octavio Paz

Reality is a harsh word and can invade our everyday lives. When we are struggling to cope with the physical changes which occur with long-term medical problems, reality becomes our constant companion. No longer can we deny anxiety or discomfort.

Our self-imposed rules might be the framework of our lives, but we can build a new structure which accepts illness as part of the reality of our lives. This new structure can have much more depth and greater dimension than the original, for we are older and wiser. Part of the framework which gives our days meaning is our love for friends and family, and recognition of our spiritual capacity. These, too, become our new reality.

I no longer expect perfect health, but I can minimize my complaining and maximize my efforts to live a meaningful life.

************************************

Food For Thought

Beginnings

Each day is a new start. Each moment is a beginning.

We do not have to wait until Monday to get back on the program or clean a closet or tackle a difficult report. We do not have to wait until tomorrow morning, either. Now is the moment to stop eating, to make a phone call, to begin whatever project we have been putting off.

There is no way we can change what we did five minutes ago, nor can we predict what will happen half an hour from now. We can only deal with now.

By doing what needs to be done right now, we make the most of each present moment. As long as we are alive, we are always free to begin again. Instead of following an old, worn out habit, make a fresh start this moment on the rest of your life.

Give me grace, Lord, to begin again.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

SETTING EXAMPLES

"Don't worry that children never listen to you;
worry that they are always watching you.
Robert Fulgham

How many overweight people blame their size on genes? My whole family had weight problems. Everywhere I turn I see obese families. In my house we were taught that it is a sin to waste food. After all, there are starving people in the world. As if my cleaning my plate would really help a starving child. How many times was I rewarded with a sweet treat instead of a hug and a "Gee you did good - I'm really proud of you." A scraped knee always felt better if you put a candy on it. I could eat the treat after the pain was gone, so of course eating made you feel better fast. My parents didn't actually teach me that food would give me instant gratification in so many words, but I learned those lessons from observation. Food helped me get through some very difficult years. I never realized that there were tools that could help through them. Unfortunately, I only found OA after my children were grown up and had watched their coe mother make the same mistakes that her parents taught her. I am trying to set a better example now. I no longer have a pantry full of junk food and when I give my grandchildren treats, it's books, stickers, hairclips, toys, anything non-edible.

God, I realize that my parents unintentionally taught me bad eating habits and I forgive them. Please let my children forgive me for making the same mistakes. Help me to set a better example for the next generation. Please be with me when I buy groceries and let me bring only healthy food into my house. Help me to be satisfied with my abstinent meals so that I won't be tempted to binge and graze with little eyes upon me. I am so grateful for Your presence in my life, because I can't do this alone.

One day at a time . . .
Please remind me that there are tools I can use instead of slipping into my old eating habits and let me be an example of the miracles that come with abstinence.
Jeanette

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish. - Pg. 16 - Bill's Story

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Family and fellowship, sponsors and counselors are our source of strength and good feelings today, not Jim Beam and Mary Jane.

May I try not to control the people who help long enough to listen to their words of guidance.

Appreciating Life

I have the gift of life. I am here. I am alive, with all of my senses and able to experience the magic of this incredible world. Whatever this day has in store for me, I am open to receive. I will act on my day and allow my day to act on me. I am open. I will take steps that I know will make my day feel good, productive and pleasurable, and then I will let the rest happen. Each day presents me with gifts and surprises, if I know how to unwrap the present, if I remember how to be astonished or pleased.

Life itself is the gift.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Often the difference between a bad attitude and a good one is simply what you call it. You can be lonely or enjoy blessed solitude. You can be burdened or building strength. People can use you or you can be of use to others.

Whether it is AA for 'Altered Attitude,' NA for 'New Attitude,' or CDA for 'Change'D Attitude,' my attitude today is a direct reflection of my personal growth.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Misery is an option. But acceptance and gratitude did not come as standard equipment either.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I will 'act as if' I am worth loving. I am beginning to tell myself that I am worthy of loving myself. I will acknowledge all the good and lovable things about me. I will 'act as if' until I know that it is true.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I'd called AA and they sent this fella Kevin around. He came into my office, put his hand out and asked how I was. I said my standard 'Great'. And he kept hold of my hand pulled me up close, eye-balled me and said; 'Bull s...' - He was my sponsor from that day. - Dave B.