Turn Away

[MajestyJo]

We are not dispensable or so with think. No one can do our job, certainly not the way we do it, and ours is the right way.

The things we tell ourselves when we are in our denial. It is always about the other person, certainly not me.

They use to call me Odd Job Jo at work, because if someone was away, sick, or fired, I did their job and mine too. I trained others, filled in for someone away from another department or they had an extra job to be done. I would burn out, and then I began using, trying to be the Almighty Jo, who could do everything and when she couldn't, she thought there was something wrong with her. I saw myself as less than, and then through my addiction, I was less than, because I no longer had the skills because the drugs and alcohol took over my life.

I turned away from others, became isolated. I turned away from my God in shame, because all I could see was one BIG sin. I turned away from friends and family, and had the biggest pity pot you ever saw.

I had to turn from my new old ways, and start a new. I turned to the program of AA for help. They led me to NA, Al-anon, and CA who say, "All mind altering substances."