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Go Back   Bluidkiti's Alcohol and Drug Addictions Recovery Help/Support Forums > Alcohol, Drugs and Other Addictions Recovery > Alcohol, Drugs and Other Addictions Recovery > Family and Friends of Alcoholics and Addicts

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Family and Friends of Alcoholics and Addicts This forum is for families and friends whose lives have been affected by someone else's drinking and/or drug abuse.

 
 
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Old 08-19-2014, 04:23 AM   #23
MajestyJo
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Tuesday, August 19, 2014

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go

Letting Go of Shame

Shame is that dark, powerful feeling that holds us back. Yes, shame can stop us from acting inappropriately. But many of us have learned to attach shame to healthy behaviors that are in our best interest.

In dysfunctional families, shame can be tagged to healthy behaviors such as talking about feelings, making choices, taking care of ourselves, having fun, being successful, or even feeling good about ourselves.

Shame may have been attached to asking for what we want and need, to communicating directly and honestly, and to giving and receiving love.

Sometimes shame disguises itself as fear, rage, indifference, or a need to run and hide, wrote Stephanie E. But if it feels dark and makes us feel bad about being who we are, it's probably shame.

In recovery, we are learning to identify shame. When we can recognize it, we can begin to let go of it. We can love and accept ourselves - starting now.

We have a right to be, to be here, and to be who we are. And we don't ever have to let shame tell us any differently.

Today, I will attack and conquer the shame in my life.
It was important for me to remember I was acting out in my dis-ease. Many times I was embarrassed for others, most times because I was fearful of them bringing shame to me and my life.

I have always had a false sense of responsibility, and I took on what was not mine, and I would be shamed because I couldn't cope. If I try to take on the job of three people, and can't cope and I pop pills, eat, and/or escape using other things, which can be simple things at the beginning, but it gets to where it over takes our life and everything else is second nature in my life.

Pray has always worked for me. Sometimes it is continuous prayer, because the old can sometimes come back and become the new.
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Jo

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