Today's Thought - December

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December 16

If we think too much, we hinder our understanding and our progress.

Step Eleven suggests that we’ll improve our conscious contact with God if we pray and meditate. The meditation part is particularly important. It’s the avenue between us and our Higher Power’s guidance. Quieting our minds of our obsession with what other people are doing isn’t always easy.

But it’s there, in the quiet, that we’ll feel God’s guidance, God’s message, God’s comfort. Having busy minds isn’t unusual. Nor is it accidental. Our minds are full because we fill them. If we want quiet minds in order to know God better, we must empty them.

God answers our prayers in the quiet spaces of our minds. Let’s listen.

I will clear my mind today so God can reach me with what I need to know.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance*

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December 17

…concern should drive us into action and not into depression.

~Karen Homey

The role of victim is all too familiar to many of us. Life did us injustices—we thought. And we passively waited for circumstances to change. With the bottle we waited, or maybe the little white pills. Nothing was our fault. That we were willing participants to victimization is an awareness not easily accepted, but true nonetheless.

Victims no more, we are actors, now. And since committing ourselves to this program, we have readily available a willing and very able director for our role in life. Every event invites an action, and we have opted for the responsible life.

Depression may be on the fringes of our consciousness today. But it need not become our state of mind. The antidote is and always will be action, responsible action. Every concern, every experience wants our attention, our active attention.

Today stretches before me, an unknown quantity. Concerns will crowd upon me, but guidance regarding the best action to take is always available to me.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning: Daily meditations for Women*

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December 18

Letting Go of Timing

When the time is right, child. When the time is right. How often have we heard those words—from a friend, a sponsor, our Higher Power?

We want things so badly—that job, that check, a relationship, a possession. We want our life to change. So we wait, sometimes patiently, sometimes anxiously, wondering all the while: When will the future bring me what I long for? Will I be happy then?

We try to predict, circling dates on the calendar, asking questions. We forget that we don’t hold the answers. The answers come from God. If we listen closely, we’ll hear them. When the time is right, child. When the time is right. Be happy now.

Today, I will relax. I am being prepared. I can let go of timing. I can stop manipulating outcomes. Good things will happen when the time is right, and they will happen naturally.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency*

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December 19

The smartest thing I ever said was, “Help me!”

~Dorrie T.

How difficult it is to acknowledge that we need help! How it goes against the grain to admit we are needy. But “Help me!” is the password that opens the door to recovery.

When we say these words to our Higher Power, spouse or partner, or friend, we are really saying we are ready to be honest. For some of us, this may be the first honest personal statement we have made in many years.

When we ask others to help us learn to be free, to deal with our illusions, to shuck off our compulsions, we are asking them to help us turn on the light. Only the light of honesty can show us our hidden immaturities and stumbling-block character defects. Childish temper tantrums disguised as righteous indignation must be seen for what they are. The inability to accept love must not be allowed to wear the mask of sophistication. Are we too cool to be caught or too scared to be honest?

Some things are just too difficult to figure out without a little help from our friends.

Today, I will come closer to freedom by asking someone who is honest to help me be honest.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy: Daily Meditations for Adult Children*

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December 20

Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.

~William James

As active addicts, we walked through life as if we were disposable. Shame kept telling us we had no value, and over time we acted as if we had no value. We acted as if how we conducted ourselves didn’t matter—but it did. A fellow addict used to say that it wouldn’t matter if he dropped dead tomorrow. When he died of his addiction, there were many tears at his funeral, especially by his children.

We must go out into our life and make a difference. With each new day that we stay sober and live by spiritual values, we get rid of a bit more shame. Over time the shame goes away, and we start to see the happiness that our new way of being brings. We see that just being at home, playing with our children or spouse, makes a difference. We see that just being a good employee makes a difference. We see that just being a good citizen makes a difference. We see our value, and it makes us happy.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, when I am not able to see my own value, help me to see that I make a difference. Take away my shame.
Today's Action

Today I will practice walking through my day as if I make a difference. I will work to be helpful to others and to conduct myself with dignity.

Today's reading is from the book God Grant Me: More Daily Meditations from the Authors of Keep It Simple*

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December 21

Changes

Change your thoughts, and you change your world.

~Norman Vincent Peale

We learn from the program that all of our lives are made up of changes. Life for us can be like the seasons of the year. The uncomfortable blizzards of winter will pass. Spring brings flowers. Chattering birds fill the air with song where once there was wind, snow, and ice.

We know summer will follow spring. We learn to take the bad with the good. Hardships can make us stronger. Suffering cannot last forever. The key is to see life with optimism. We know that the changing of the seasons is like the changes in our lives.

When we use the Serenity Prayer, we may occasionally lose sight of its meaning. We need to concentrate on the differences between what we can change and what we can’t.

I trust and believe that the changes in my recovery life are like the changing of the seasons. They are necessary and good for me.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It: A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations*

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December 22

The only true hope for civilization—the conviction of the individual that his inner life can affect outward events.

~Stephen Spender

Our addiction may have left us little time to think about our society and our world. We may have spent vast sums of money and energy feeding the addiction that was devouring us. And the world was reduced to the fantasies that were spinning around in our heads.

We deserve better for ourselves. And we can change. There is a relationship between what we think and what we do—and what we do affects others as well as ourselves. Our addiction has caused misery to others. Our recovery brings joy to other people as well as to ourselves. Changing our inner lives, becoming free from the stranglehold of addiction, releases new energy and desires that, turned outward, act upon the world. We take and take again these Twelve Steps and spread the news of hope and recovery to others. We join in activities in the group and find ourselves growing spiritually. As we follow the path, we realize that we can and do make a difference by helping others live out their full potential.

I am not an island but part of a community that is affected by my beliefs and actions.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart: Daily Meditations for Men and Women Recovering from Sex Addiction*

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December 23

Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.

~Truman Capote

Accepting failure in achieving goals we’ve set for our job, friendships, and daily endeavors is seldom easy. We often demand success, if not perfection, from ourselves and from others. We set standards that can seldom be met; then, when we fail, we’re humiliated rather than humbled. And with this attitude, no matter how many successes we’ve had, they’re cancelled by one failure, no matter how small.

Our journey is made more difficult by these impossible expectations. We seem to find it hard to believe that God does not expect perfection and does not judge our success and failure by the same unbending measuring stick we often apply to ourselves. We are successful every moment that our actions are honest, loving, and consistent with our values. And when they’re not, we are successful when we admit our shortcomings, make amends, and turn it all over to God.

Today’s failures will be reminders to stay humble and surrender my shortcomings to God so that I may go on to enjoy my successes.

Today's reading is from the book In God's Care: Daily Meditations on Spirituality in Recovery*

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December 24

The great man is he who does not lose his child-heart.

~Mencius

No matter what we have done or what has happened to us, no matter how guilty, worried, or fearful we feel, there was a time when we were small, innocent, and openhearted toward the world. That happy and playful boy still lives within us. Sometimes he seems like a distant memory, but we would do well to bring him close to us, give him a place in our awareness, and honor and protect him.

Some of us remembered that little boy being treated too harshly or shamed too deeply, and we adopted false attitudes of disgust toward him. But we can go back still further to a time when he was innocent and we could love him. A strong and healthy man carries that boy close to his heart and lets him come forth to be playful and lighthearted. That boy can be the source of eagerness to learn and hope for the future. He can put himself in the shoes of the small and the weak and treat them with gentleness.

Today, my child-heart beats within me as strongly as it ever did.

Today's reading is from the book Stepping Stones: More Daily Meditations for Men*

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December 25

Love is a force. It is not a result; it is a cause. It is not a product; it produces. It is a power, like money, or steam or electricity. It is valueless unless you can give something else by means of it.

~Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Love and feeling loved—how often both elude us! We have taken the first step, though. Let's be grateful for our recovery; this is an act of love. We have chosen to love ourselves, and the program opens the way to our loving others. Love and loving are balms for the soul sickness we experience. We are being healed. We are healing one another.

Loving others means going beyond our own selfish concerns, for the moment, and putting others' concerns first. The result is that others feel our love. They feel a caring that is healing. And our spiritual natures are likewise soothed.

We find God and ourselves through touching the souls of one another. Our most special gift is being loved and giving love. Every moment we spend with another person is gift-giving time.

Every day is a gift-giving holiday, if I will but make it so

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning: Daily meditations for Women*

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December 26

AA Thought for the Day

In the beginning of Alcoholics Anonymous there were only two persons. Now there are many groups and thousands of members. True, the surface has only been scratched. There are probably ten million or more persons in America alone who need our help. More and more people are making a start in AA each day. In the case of individual members, the beginning has been accomplished when they admit they are powerless and turn to a Power greater than themselves, admitting that their lives have become unmanageable. Our Higher Power works for good in all things and helps us to accomplish much in individual growth and in the growth of AA groups. Am I doing my part in helping AA to grow?
Meditation for the Day

“Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled.” Only in the fullness of faith can the heart-sick and faint and weary be satisfied, healed, and rested. Think of the wonderful spiritual revelations still to be found by those who are trying to live the spiritual life. Much of life is spiritually unexplored country. Only to the consecrated and loving people who walk with God in spirit can these great spiritual discoveries be revealed. Keep going forward, and keep growing in righteousness.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not be held back by the material things of the world. I pray that I may let God lead me forward.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day: A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life*

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December 27

One is happy as a result of one's own efforts, tastes, a certain degree of courage, self-denial to a point, love of work, and, above all, a clear conscience. Happiness is no vague dream; of that I now feel certain.

~George Sand

"We always go get a hot fudge sundae after the school choir concert," the girl said. Her parents laughed because their daughter said always, and they had gone to a school choir concert only once. Then the parents realized that the girl really had a great idea. "Yes," the mother said, "we always get a sundae because we like to make up new traditions. We'll have to be sure and do it tonight so we don't let the tradition fall apart before it even gets started!"

They all laughed together and started debating which restaurant had the best hot fudge sundae.

We all need to have special traditions with our families. We need celebrations that have nothing to do with official holidays. Family holidays can mean so much more to us sometimes because they celebrate our shared experiences in life and become the source of happy memories for a lifetime.

What tradition can I start today?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families*

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December 28

Alcoholism isn’t a spectator sport. Eventually the whole family gets to play.

~Joyce Rebeta-Burditt

One of the biggest lies addicts can tell themselves is “I’m not hurting anyone but myself.” This is just another way we don’t see how important we are to others. During our using, love was a burden. When anyone showed love for us, we turned away. They hurt. And we hurt.

In recovery, when ready, we try to help our families heal. We listen as they speak of how our illness has hurt them. We comfort them as they tell their stories. Remember, our illness hurt them. Remember, our recovery will help them heal.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me face the pain my illness has brought to others. Let me know their pain. Let it help me stay sober.
Action for the Day

I will list all persons my illness has hurt. I will say a prayer for them, even if they have harmed me.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple: Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal*

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December 29

Today's Gift, Daily Inspiration
The tremor of awe is the best in man.

~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

We have a spiritual experience in knowing and being touched by something much larger than us, something beyond what we understand, something of mysterious dimensions. It can happen as we stand on the banks of an ageless river, listen to beautiful music, read scripture, or say a prayer with a friend. When we set aside defiance, willfulness, and our demands to subdue whatever we meet, we become receptive to a larger reality. The experience of awe brings out the best in a man because it instills a spirit of respect and gratitude. It inspires humility and expands our minds into realms we can’t express in words.

The sense of awe is a kind of reverence. After we learn where our personal awe is inspired, we can return to it again and again. As we feel it more, we become more open to it in the mundane parts of our daily lives. Today, we might feel the spirit in the visit of a wild bird on a branch, the spontaneous “Hi” from a small child, or the stillness before prayer at the dinner table.

Today, I will look for moments of awe in my life.

'Today's reading is from the book Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men*

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December 30

Helping others

We can arm ourselves with facts about mind-altering substances to share with addicts, but just hearing the information will not necessarily convince anyone of their addiction. We cannot prance around diagnosing people, but we can make suggestions that encourage users to diagnose themselves.

We can propose the “controlled using for thirty days” test or one of the several written self-tests. If they pass the tests, then their problem is probably not like ours. We are not doctors or demigods, but we can carry the message. When our Higher Power sees fit, there are those we can aid.

Do I try to help others diagnose themselves?

Higher Power, may your love and light shine forth through me, but may I not set myself up to do your job.

Today I will carry the message to…

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day: Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts*