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03-06-2024, 05:29 AM | #1 |
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Join Date: Aug 2013
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March 16
Daily Reflections AS WE UNDERSTAND HIM My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea . . . "Why don't you choose your own conception of God?" That statement hit me hard. It melted the icy intellectual mountain in whose shadow I had lived and shivered many years. I stood in the sunlight at last. It was only a matter of being willing to believe in a Power greater than myself. Nothing more was required of me to make my beginning. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 12 I remember the times I looked up into the sky and reflected on who started it all, and how. When I came to A.A., an understanding of some description of the spiritual dimension became a necessary adjunct to a stable sobriety. After reading a variety of versions, including the scientific, of a great explosion, I went for simplicity and made the God of my understanding the Great Power that made the explosion possible. With the vastness of the universe under His command, He would, no doubt, be able to guide my thinking and actions if I was prepared to accept His guidance. But I could not expect help if I turned my back on that help and went my own way. I became willing to believe and I have had 26 years of stable and satisfying sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Before we decide to quit drinking, most of us have come up against a blank wall. We see that we're licked, that we have to quit. But we don't know which way to turn for help. There seems to be no door in that blank wall. A.A. opens the door that leads to sobriety. By encouraging us to honestly admit that we're alcoholics and to realize that we can't take even one drink, and by showing us which way to turn for help, A.A. opens the door in that blank wall. Have I gone through that door to sobriety? Meditation For The Day I must have a singleness of purpose to do my part in God's work. I must not let material distractions interfere with my job of improving personal relationships. It is easy to become distracted by material affairs, so that I lose my singleness of purpose. I do not have time to be concerned about the multifarious concerns of the world. I must concentrate and specialize on what I can do best. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not become distracted by material affairs. I pray that I may concentrate on doing what I can do best. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Losing Financial Fears, p. 75 When a job still looked like a mere means of getting money rather than an opportunity for service, when the acquisition of money for financial independence looked more important than a right independence upon God, we were the victims of unreasonable fears. And these were fears which would make a serene and useful existence, at any financial level, quite impossible. But as time passed we found that with the help of A.A.'s Twelve Steps we could lose those fears, no matter what our material prospects were. We could cheerfully perform humble labor without worrying about tomorrow. If our circumstances happened to be good, we no longer dreaded a change for the worse, for we had learned that these troubles could be turned into great values, for ourselves and for others. 12 & 12, pp. 121-122 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Anger…. A dangerous weapon Self-control One reason some of us have trouble overcoming anger is that we've used it too often as an offensive weapon. It can be employed as an excuse to leave the house, it can bring an argument to an explosive end, and it can make others fearful and defensive. In the past this brought results of a sort, and helped reinforce the idea that anger works. The trouble with anger, though, is that it's destructive. Once angry, we hurt ourselves and we hurt others. Terrible things said in anger leave wounds that never heal, creating problems that lead to more anger. The AA program can show us that there is virtually no justification for anger, under any and all circumstances. If we sense it coming on, we have the choice of taking charge of our feelings. If we're angry over another's behavior, we can remember that anger might be a way of reacting, but it's not necessary in our lives. I'll make it through this day without a trace of anger. I'll frequently remind myself that anger is destructive and that my real purpose is to build a better life. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.---Oscar Wilde We all change. We learn, and change, and grow. We once made alcohol or other drugs our Higher Power. Perhaps we had other higher powers too---like money, gambling, food, or sex. But, it's never too late to be in touch with a true Higher Power. Each day we follow a false higher power, we aren't. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me put my life and will in Your hands today. Help me be a saint, just for today. Action for the Day: How have my ideas about saints and sinners changed since I got into a Twelve Step program? I'll talk with my sponsor about it today. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning True intimacy with another human being can only be experienced when you have found true peace within yourself. --Angela L. Wozniak Intimacy means disclosure--full expression of ourselves to another person. Nothing held back. All bared. There are risks, of course: rejection, criticism, perhaps ridicule. But the comfort we feel within is directly proportional to the peace we've come to know. Each day we commit ourselves to recovery, we find a little more peace. Each conversation we have with our higher power brings us a little more security. Each time we turn our full attention to another person's needs, we feel our own burdens lightened. Peace comes in stages. As we continue to accept our powerlessness, the depth of our peace increases. Turning more often to a power greater than ourselves eases our resistance to whatever condition prevails. Forgiving ourselves and others, daily, heightens our appreciation of all life and enhances our humility. Therein lies peace. We each are a necessary part of the creative spirit prevailing in this world. The details of our lives are well in hand. We can be at peace. Who we are is who we need to be. Intimacy lets me help someone else also live a full and peace-filled life. I will reach out to someone today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS You will note that we made and important qualification. Therefore, ask yourself on each occasion, “Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little vicarious pleasure from the atmosphere of such places?” If you answer these questions satisfactorily, you need have no apprehension. Go or stay away, whichever seems best. But be sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive in going is thoroughly good. Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it. But if you are shaky, you had better work with another alcoholic instead! pp. 101- 102 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. The November following, I took a few days off after pay day to celebrate my birthday on the twenty-fifth of the month. As usual I got drunk and lost the money. Someone had taken it from me. That was the usual pattern. I sometimes gave it to my mother, and the I'd go back and hound her for it. I was just about broke. I guess I had five or ten dollars in my pocket. Anyhow, on the twenty-fourth, after drinking all day on the twenty-third, I must have decided I wanted to see my wife and have some kind of reconciliation or at least talk with her. I don't remember whether I went by streetcar, whether I walked or went in a taxicab. The one thing I can remember now was that Vi was on the corner of 8th and L, and I remember talking to her, but what happened after that I don't know. What actually happened was that I had taken a penknife and stabbed Vi three times with it. Then I left and went home to bed. Around eight or nine o'clock there came two big detectives and a policeman to arrest me for assault; and I was the most amazed person in the world when they said I had assaulted my wife. I was taken to the station house and locked up. pp. 240-241 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Aren't these practices joy-killers as well as time-consumers? Must A.A.'s spend most of their waking hours drearily rehashing their sins of omission or commission? Well, hardly. The emphasis on inventory is heavy only because a great many of us have never really acquired the habit of accurate self-appraisal. Once this healthy practice has become grooved, it will be so interesting and profitable that the time it takes won't be missed. For these minutes and sometimes hours spent in self-examination are bound to make all the other hours of our day better and happier. And at length our inventories become a regular part of everyday living, rather than something unusual or set apart. pp. 89-90 ************************************************** ********* Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens." --Carl Jung No matter how long a room is dark, turn on a light and the room brightens. Today marks a new beginning. You can claim a clean slate with God. --Mary Manin Morrissey The principle we are working with today is STILLNESS. It is accomplished through the act of meditation, which is stilling of the physical/conscious mind to all external stimuli. Continuous, contemplative thought given to truth. A steady effort of the mind to know and hear the voice of God from within the being. The act of not doing in an attempt to expand the awareness of being. When we quiet the conscious mind to hear the Divine presence. --Iyalna Vanzant Is my way of handling anger pleasing to God? --Marilyn Watson I Am Responsible . . . When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of A.A. always to be there. And for that: I am responsible. --Declaration of 30th Anniversary International Convention, 1965 As Bill Sees It, p. 332 ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation RISK "A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular." -- Adlai Stevenson Tough love requires that at times I must say or do things that make me "unpopular". That is part of the spiritual risk of loving: to be popular is not always to be right! As an alcoholic I was a people-pleaser; concerned with saying what people wanted to hear, do what people expected, remain silent rather than cause upsets. I was afraid that if I said what I really thought, I might be rejected. My self-esteem was secondary to what other people thought of me. Today in my sobriety I love myself enough to say what I believe and do what I consider right. I refuse to remain silent when confronted with injustice or the addictions of others. My spiritual program risks the possibility of being unpopular. Teach me to always say and do what I believe to be true. ************************************************** ********* "For the word of the LORD is right and true; he is faithful in all he does." Psalm 33:4 Thine, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty. 1 Chronicles 29:11 Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger. Ephesians 4:26 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Prayer turns the attention from ourselves to God and helps us see His hand working in our lives. Lord, You give me reasons for a daily commitment to achieving a full and energetic life. Allow the power of God to work within you because He is able to accomplish far more than we can dream. Lord, Your spirit empowers me. May I do Your Will and always give glory to You. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Inventory "The purpose of a searching and fearless moral inventory is to sort through the confusion and the contradiction of our lives so that we can find out who we really are." Basic Text p. 27 Using addicts are a confused and confusing bunch of people. It's hard to tell from one minute to the next what they're going to do or who they're going to be. Usually, the addict is just as surprised as anyone else. When we used, our behavior was dictated by the needs of our addiction. Many of us still identify our personalities closely with the behavior we practiced while using, leading us to feel shame and despair. Today, we don't have to be the people we once were, shaped by our addiction; recovery has allowed us to change. We can use the Fourth Step inventory to see past the needs of the old using life and find out who we want to be today. Writing about our behavior and noticing how we feel about that behavior helps us understand who we want to be. Our inventory helps us see beyond the demands of active addiction, beyond our desire to be loved and accepted—we find out who we are at the root. We begin to understand what's appropriate for us, and what we want our lives to be like. This is the beginning of becoming who we really are. Just for today: If I want to find out who I am, I'll look at who I've been and who I want to be. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. 'Tis God gives skill, but not without men's hands. He could not make Antonio Stradivarius violins without Antonio. --George Eliot When she was four years old, she climbed onto the piano stool. To her parents' astonishment, a simple prelude she'd heard on the radio flew across the keys from her fingers. That very week they found her a teacher, and the house was filled with the music of her developing talent. While other girls played, made the honor roll, starred on the basketball team, and dated boyfriends, she sat inside at her beloved piano and practiced. At seventeen, when she made her debut, the critics said, "She's a natural. A genius!" We know she was no natural, but through hard work, she made her piano playing part of her nature. When we put love into our labor, our own dreams grow into being. Am I willing to make some sacrifices today to do the things I really want to do? You are reading from the book Touchstones. When a man's self is hidden from everybody else ... it seems also to become hidden even from himself, and it permits disease and death to gnaw into his substance without his clear knowledge. --Sidney Jourard A man's recovery is in knowing himself honestly and learning to have loving relationships with others. Many of us have had close calls with death as the consequence of our addictions or codependency. We ignored the dangers in our lives and many of us neglected our health. We wore ourselves out and wasted our energies. Spiritual recovery and physical health go hand in hand. In recovery, moving toward fullness in life, our selves are returned to us. We leave behind our old learning and habits because they were lethal. We are becoming men who tune in to ourselves and to others around us. We are looking at ourselves and saying, "I'll work with it!" I will not hide myself; I will continue to be open with myself and others. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. True intimacy with another human being can only be experienced when you have found true peace within yourself. --Angela L. Wozniak Intimacy means disclosure--full expression of ourselves to another person. Nothing held back. All bared. There are risks, of course: rejection, criticism, perhaps ridicule. But the comfort we feel within is directly proportional to the peace we've come to know. Each day we commit ourselves to recovery, we find a little more peace. Each conversation we have with our higher power brings us a little more security. Each time we turn our full attention to another person's needs, we feel our own burdens lightened. Peace comes in stages. As we continue to accept our powerlessness, the depth of our peace increases. Turning more often to a power greater than ourselves eases our resistance to whatever condition prevails. Forgiving ourselves and others, daily, heightens our appreciation of all life and enhances our humility. Therein lies peace. We each are a necessary part of the creative spirit prevailing in this world. The details of our lives are well in hand. We can be at peace. Who we are is who we need to be. Intimacy lets me help someone else also live a full and peace-filled life. I will reach out to someone today. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Positive Energy Its so easy to look around and notice what's wrong. It takes practice to see what's right. Many of us have lived around negativity for years. We've become skilled at labeling what's wrong with other people, our life, our work, our day, our relationships, our conduct, our recovery, and ourselves. We want to be realistic, and our goal is to identify and accept reality. However, this is often not our intent when we practice negativity. The purpose of negativity is usually annihilation. Negative thinking empowers the problem. It takes us out of harmony. Negative energy sabotages and destroys. It has a powerful life of its own. So does positive energy. Each day, we can ask what's right, what's good - about other people, our life, our work, our day, our relationships, ourselves, our conduct, our recovery. Positive energy heals, conducts love, and transforms. Choose positive energy. Today, God help me let go of negativity. Transform my beliefs and thinking, at the core, from negative to positive. Put me in harmony with the good. Choosing positive thoughts and making positive choices fill me with new strength, confidence and excitement. I can feel positive energy flow through me with every positive thought I choose. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Become Willing to Heal Your Heart We don’t open our hearts by being a tower of strength. We don’t open our hearts by glossing over things in our head. We open our hearts by feeling what we feel. We open our hearts by being vulnerable, honest, and gentle. We’ve become so strong, so self-sufficient. I can deal with that we say. No big deal. I’ll keep moving on. Yet many circumstances we’ve been through, and some we’re going through now, cause break lines in our heart. Some of the fractures are small. Some are big. They really hurt. Maybe certain people in our lives weren’t there for us, aren’t there for us now in a way we’d like them to be. Maybe some deceived us unconsciously or betrayed us deliberately. I can deal with that we say. I understand. They have their own issues. I forgive. Yes, people do have their own issues. And we do forgive. But now it may be time to learn gentleness, compassion, understanding, and forgiveness for ourselves as well. We don’t open our hearts by ignoring the break lines. We take our hand, knowing it’s held by God, and gently run our fingers across each crack. Yes, it’s there. Yes, I feel it. Yes, I’m ready to heal my heart. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Don’t be a back seat driver I was walking through a toy store one day when I saw a little toy steering wheel attached to the tray of a stroller. The child could play with the wheel and pretend that he or she was controlling the direction of the cart. The steering wheel wasn’t attached to anything; someone else was behind the stroller, pushing it here or there. The child could steer all he or she wanted to, but if Mom was going to the hardware department, then the child was going there,too. What a good lesson to teach children at such an early age: no matter where you steer, something bigger than you is going to push you wherever it wants. We soon outgrow the stroller and then burst into adulthood. First we learn to drive– finally a wheel that does something! Now we’ve got real freedom! But the car needs gas, we have a curfew, and there are speed limits and driving laws. Or we graduate from school and move into the real world. Finally no more parents controlling our every move. But then there is rent, and the boss, and the roommates, or a spouse and children to consider. No matter how much we grow, where we go, or how old we get, there is someone else above, someone bigger, pushing us in this direction or that. Sorry, no new car this year, you’ve got a different lesson to learn. We can want things, pray for things, and hope that things will come to pass. But ultimately, we’re not in control. Instead of spending our time and energy trying to get someplace else, we can learn the lesson and enjoy the beauty of the life we’ve been given. ****************************************** In God’s Care As the ripples caused by a flung stone stir the surface of a whole pond, so your joy-making shall spread in ever-widening circles. ~~God Calling, March 10th We might all have friends who stir up bubbles of joy within us. We love being in their presence. A gloomy day doesn’t darken their mood, as it might ours, and we wonder where their joy comes from. The answer is simple. Somehow, they have discovered that they have some choice as to their mood, and in most situations they decide to experience joy. We can choose the same for ourselves. Our feelings, actions, and attitudes are within our personal realm of control. To pretend that only people and circumstances are what make us happy or angry is denying what God has given each of us: the power to make choices about who we are every moment. To feel joy is often a decision no more difficult than to feel sorrow. Choosing to see our blessings, even in the wake of turmoil, will bring us joy. And then we, too, can encourage joy in others. My joy can be my decision. I’ll make joy my mood of choice whenever possible today. ****************************************** Answering the Call Taking Responsibility for Your Destiny by Madisyn Taylor Each and every day you have the opportunity to answer your own call and take action toward creating the life you want. There are those of us who believe that our lives are predestined and that we should resign ourselves to our lots in life. Yet the truth is that it is up to each one of us to decide what that destiny will be. While each of us is born with a life purpose, it is up to us whether or not we will say yes to fulfilling it. And just like when we choose what to eat, who to keep company with, and whether to turn right or left when we leave our home everyday, choosing to say yes to your destiny is a decision that can only be realized when you take action to make that choice a reality. Whether you believe it is your destiny to be a parent, an adventurer, an artist, a pioneer, or a spiritual guru, saying yes to your destiny is only the first step. While manifesting your destiny starts with knowing what you want and believing you can attain your goals, there are then the actions that must be taken and the decisions to be made before your destiny can truly happen. When you take responsibility for fulfilling your destiny and begin acting with the intention of doing so, you not only take fate into your own hands, but also you become the hands of your own fate. Doorways inevitably open for you to step through, and every choice you make can be a creative act toward realizing your goals and dreams. You begin to follow your instincts and intuition, recognize opportunities when they are presented to you, and seize those golden moments. You also begin to recognize the decisions that may not serve this greater picture and can more easily push them aside. Remembering that the decision to fulfill your destiny is always a choice can be empowering. Knowing you are fulfilling your destiny because you want to, rather than because you have to, can make a huge difference. When you are freed from obligation, obstacles in your way become challenges to be overcome, and the journey becomes an adventure rather than the obligatory steps you are being forced to take. Your destiny may be waiting for you, but whether or not you meet your destiny is up to you. Your fate is in your hands. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program teaches us that we are bodily and mentally different than our fellows. We are reminded that the great obsession of every abnormal drinker — and every one of us who is otherwise addictive — is to prove that somehow, some day, we will be able to control our drinking,, eating or gambling. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing, we are told, and many pursue it to the gates of insanity or death. Have I conceded to my innermost self that, for me, “One is too many and a thousand not enough..”? Today I Pray May I have no illusions about someday becoming a moderate drinker or drug-user after being an obsessive one. May I muffle any small voice of destructive pride which lies to me, telling me that I can now go back to my former addiction and control it. This is a Program of no-return, and I thank God for it. Today I Will Remember My goal must be lifelong abstinence — a day at a time. ****************************************** One More Day Time ripens all things. No man’s born wise. – Cervantes One moment in time, a phrase from an old song that still rings true. In a single moment we could decide the balance of how we will live our lives. Split-second decisions, not all good ones, permeate the fabric of our lives, of everyone’s lives — regardless of medical problems. Sometimes we are very sorry about a decision we made too quickly, a decision which may alter the course of our lives for a short while or even permanently. Perhaps the car we insisted on having is a lemon, or we may not like the new community into which we impulsively moved. We have to learn to live with our decisions, at least until we make a decision to change. Ponder a decision just a moment longer. Each experience can deepen our wisdom. I will attempt to take my time when making decisions. ************************************ Food For Thought Difficult Times When we have hard things to do, we especially need our abstinence. We know from experience that maintaining it is the only way we can feel good and cope effectively. Formerly, we turned to food to strengthen us and prop us up during difficult times. We invariably ate too much and were less able to manage the troublesome situation. Food then became an escape, and we sometimes ended up doing nothing at all about a problem, since we had eaten ourselves into oblivion. We know now that instead of strengthening us, extra food incapacitates us. No matter how difficult the situation we face, we know that eating unnecessary food will eventually make it worse. We have come to believe that whatever happens, our Higher Power will give us the strength we need if we will rely on Him. May I rely on You, Lord, instead of food. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Serenity "Serenity is not freedom from the storm, but peace amid the storm." Anonymous Quote Why is serenity so important to our recovery? Because darkness cannot exist where there is light! If we can maintain a serene state of mind as established through our faith in HP and the BB Promises, negative emotions and behavior will have no power over us. Stress, fear, compulsiveness, obsessiveness, resentment, guilt, shame, willfulness, doubt, distrust, greed and envy, have no power over a mind that is kept in serene repose. Serenity allows us to see situations clearly and make wise decisions. Most importantly, by maintaining a serene mind, we keep the door to our High Power open. One Day at a Time . . . I will face each challenge with grace and serenity. ~ Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn't think so. - Pg. 62 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We always wanted our image to be so good, yet we always seemed to come off bad. No amount of mind-affecting chemicals ever made us come off good, either. They just made us think we were OK. But there is nothing so bad right now, that a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort won't make it worse. May I clearly see that drugs only provided an illusion of good time, not the real thing. Each Day is a Day of Birth I am being continually reborn. Each day life renews itself transforming from one state to another. Flowers bloom and then their petals drop to the ground and become fertilizer for new growth. Seasons change. The sun comes up and at the end of each day it disappears for the night only to reappear bright, strong and warm the next morning. I am part of this natural and daily renewal of life. Everything I experience becomes part of my process of personal growth. I refine my learning each day, I drop what I don't need to the ground where it becomes fertilizer for tomorrow's renewal, tomorrow's rebirth, into my ever expanding sense of life. Each day gifts come and go, each day they are renewed. I am born each day into more of myself. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote There are two times when you need to go to a meeting, when you think you need one and when you know you don't. Rather than thinking about going to a meeting, I go to the meeting, and then think about it. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You can't change reality, but you can change your attitude towards it. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Choosing positive thoughts and making positive choices fille me with new strength, confidence and excitement. I can feel positive energy flow through me with every positive thought I choose. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Fear is a darkroom where negatives are developed. - Anon.
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03-10-2024, 07:29 AM | #2 |
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March 17
Daily Reflections MYSTERIOUS WAYS . . . out of every season of grief or suffering, when the hand of God seemed heavy or even unjust, new lessons for living were learned, new resources of courage were uncovered, and that finally, inescapably, the conviction came that God does "move in a mysterious way His wonders to perform." TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105 After losing my career, family and health, I remained unconvinced that my way of life needed a second look. My drinking and other drug use were killing me, but I had never met a recovering person or an A.A. member. I thought I was destined to die alone and that I deserved it. At the peak of my despair, my infant son became critically ill with a rare disease. Doctors' efforts to help him proved useless. I redoubled my efforts to block my feelings, but now the alcohol had stopped working. I was left staring into God's eyes, begging for help. My introduction to A.A. came within days, through an odd series of coincidences, and I have remained sober ever since. My son lived and his disease is in remission. The entire episode convinced me of my powerlessness and the unmanageability of my life. Today my son and I thank God for his intervention. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day A. A. also helps us to hang onto sobriety. By having regular meetings so that we can associate with other alcoholics who have come through that same door in the wall, by encouraging us to tell the story of our own sad experiences with alcohol, and by showing us how to help other alcoholics. A.A. keeps us sober. Our attitude toward life changes from one of pride and selfishness to one of humility and gratitude. Am I going to step back through that door in the wall to my old helpless, hopeless, drunken life? Meditation For The Day Withdraw into the calm of communion with God. Rest in that calm and peace. When the soul finds its home of rest in God, then it is that real life begins. Only when you are calm and serene can you do good work. Emotional upsets make you useless. The eternal life is calmness and when a man enters into that, then he lives as an eternal being. Calmness is based on complete trust in God. Nothing in this world can separate you from the love of God. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may wear the world like a loose garment. I pray that I may keep serene at the center of my being. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Only God Is Unchanging, p. 76 "Change is the characteristic of all growth. From drinking to sobriety, from dishonesty to honesty, from conflict to serenity, from hate to love, from childish independence to adult responsibility--all this and infinitely more represent change for the better. "Such changes are accomplished by a belief in and a practice of sound principles. Here we must needs discard bad or ineffective principles in favor of good ones that work. Even good principles can sometimes be displaced by the discovery of still better ones. "Only God is unchanging; only He has all the truth there is." Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Is it Easy? Practicing principles There's no "softer, easier way," we're told. If so, why are we also urged to embrace the slogan "Easy Does it?" Which is right? Both are right, because they express two different ideas. The softer, easier way doesn't work because it grows out of self-deception and falls short of a thorough working of the program. "Easy Does it" works because it describes an approach to action that is relaxed, confident, and careful. The person seeking an easier, softer way usually avoids taking some of the steps that are considered necessary in maintaining sobriety. It's a way of trying to win without doing sufficient work. The person following the "Easy Does it" principle pays attention to every detail, but carries on without reasonable haste or excessive loafing. In a spiritual sense, "Easy Does it" also means letting the Higher Power carry the load. At all times, however, we must continue to make choices and bear responsibility for our actions. I'll be relaxed and confident while carrying on a full day's activity. There is always time to do things the right way. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Skill to do comes of doing.---Ralph Waldo Emerson Often, we just want to sit and do nothing. And why not. We go to meetings, work the Twelve Steps, read, make new friends. All this takes energy and means taking risk. Haven't we earned the right to just sit and take it a break from it all? No! In the past, we avoided life. Now we're becoming people of action. We take risk. We're becoming people who get involved in life. We practice caring about people and caring about ourselves. At times, we may complain, but we do what is needed to stay sober. We gain skills by doing. why? We do it to save our lives. How? By trusting. We now trust that our Higher Power and friends will be there for us. They will help us push past our fears. As we practice daily how to stay sober, our skills grow. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, Yours is a spirit of action. Allow me to become skilled at being active. Action for the Day: Today, I'll work at being active and alive. Maybe I'll start a new friendship or try a new meeting. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning. A woman who is loved always has success. --Vicki Baum Being loved, and knowing that we are loved, assures us of our connection to the world outside of ourselves. It affirms us as participants in the bigger picture. And all of us need to know that we count--that what we say and do matters to others--that we are contributing in an important way. Often we feel unloved, however. And we search for love. We may have begged for love and still didn't feel it. We have probably become very self-centered in our search. Fortunately, the program helps us to give love to others; the paradox is that love is returned, tenfold. The wonders of love are many. Love is a healing balm for wounds. And it nurtures, both the one loving and the one loved. Love is an energizer. It spurs us on to successes in work and in play. Love multiplies. If we aren't feeling loved, we can love someone else--and love will visit us, too. We can help the women in our lives find the successes they deserve. The confidence to tackle new situations is packaged in the gift of love. We need to help one another count. My love of another is a contributing factor in her success. Her loving gratitude will enhance my own endeavors. I will take a moment, today, with a friend who needs my love. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Why sit with a long face in places where there is drinking, sighing about the good old days. If it is a happy occasion, try to increase the pleasure of those there; if a business occasion, go and attend to your business enthusiastically. If you are with a person who wants to eat in a bar, by all means go along. Let your friends know they are not to change their habits on your account. At a proper time and place explain to all your friends why alcohol disagrees with you. If you do this thoroughly, few people will ask you to drink. While you were drinking, you were withdrawing from life little by little. Now you are getting back into the social life of this world. Don’t start to withdraw again just because your friends drink liquor. p. 102 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. The next morning I went up for arraignment. Vi was very kind and explained to the jury that I was basically a fine fellow and a good husband but that I drank too much and that she thought I had lost my mind and should be committed to an asylum. The judge said that if she felt that way, he would confine me for thirty days' examination and observation. There was no observation. There might have been some investigation. The closest I came to a psychiatrist during that time was an intern who came to take blood tests. After the trial, I got big-hearted again and felt that I should do something in payment for Vi's kindness to me; so I left Washington and went to Seattle to work. I was there about three weeks, and then I got restless and started to tramp across the country, here and there, until I finally wound up in Pennsylvania, in a steel mill. p. 241 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Before we ask what a spot-check inventory is, let's look at the kind of setting in which such an inventory can do its work. It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us. If somebody hurts us and we are sore, we are in the wrong also. But are there no exceptions to this rule? What about "justifiable" anger? If somebody cheats us, aren't we entitled to be mad? Can't we be properly angry with self-righteous folk? For us of A.A. these are dangerous exceptions. We have found that justified anger ought to be left to those better qualified to handle it. p. 90 ************************************************** ********* He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the universe. --Marcus Aurelius I have learned what a heart full of gratitude feels like. If you make yourself a doormat, you will be stepped on. --American Proverb The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes. --Marcel Proust The Way isn't something that can be put into words. You have to practice before you can understand. You can't force things, including practice. Understanding is something that happens naturally. It's different for everyone. The main thing is to reduce your desires and quiet your mind. --Master Hsueh Within man is the soul of the whole; the wise silence; the universal beauty; to which every part and every particle is equally related; the eternal One. --Ralph Waldo Emerson ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SAINTS "The saints are the sinners who keep on going." -- Robert Louis Stevenson At times I do not want to carry on; I do not want to fight anymore for truth and freedom; it seems so much easier to "give up " and agree with everybody --- but I know, deep inside myself, this is not true. At times the disease speaks to me and tells me to "give up" and everything will be okay --- perhaps have one drink, don't rush off to so many meetings, get what you can when you can! It all sounds so tempting, but I know that it does not work. Sobriety works! The struggle and pain to act responsibly in my life is paying off and it does get better. I am not going to give up. My life is worth more than a quick fix! Lord, let me know that true courage is working through the pain. ************************************************** ********* "Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved." Psalms 55:22 "Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You." Psalms 56:3 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. James 4:10 Jesus said, "Love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends." John 15:12-13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration We have been given a treasure of talents which should be accepted with responsibility and gratitude. Lord, may my gifts flourish in great faith and charity so that they may also benefit others. Love who you are, for who you are, God loves. Lord, help me to never abuse myself with self pity or excess, emotionally or physically, so that I may live my life to the fullest according to Your Will. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today True Courage "Those who make it through these times show a courage not their own." Basic Text p. 82 Before coming to NA, many of us thought we were brave simply because we had never experienced fear. We had drugged all our feelings, fear among them, until we had convinced ourselves that we were tough, courageous people who wouldn't crack under any circumstances. But finding our courage in drugs has nothing to do with the way we live our lives today. Clean and in recovery, we are bound to feel frightened at times. When we first realize we are feeling frightened, we may think we are cowards. Were afraid to pick up the phone because the person on the other end might not understand. We're afraid to ask someone to sponsor us because they might say no. We're afraid to look for a job. We're afraid to be honest with our friends. But all of these fears are natural, even healthy. What's not healthy is allowing fear to paralyze us. When we permit our fear to stop our growth, we will be defeated. True courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the willingness to walk through it. Just for today: I will be courageous today. When I'm afraid, I'll do what I need to do to grow in recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Love is always open arms. --Leo Buscaglia There is a story about a boy who left home and dishonored his father by spending a large amount of money on fast and reckless living. When the boy's money ran out, he was faced with the prospect of returning home to face his father, knowing the father had every reason to be disappointed in him. Filled with fear and shame he approached his home, his mind racing with words of apology. Before the boy could say a word, his father rushed to him with open arms and hugged his lost son in joy and love. Have we done this? Have we found it in our hearts to approve whatever a loved one does, even if we would have wanted something different? Love like this is the highest kind of love. It finds joy in others no matter what, because it recognizes the freedom of those we love, and doesn't chain them to our own wants. It is the same kind of love God has for us. Are my arms open today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The reward of friendship is itself. The man who hopes for anything else does not understand what true friendship is. --Saint Ailred of Rievaulx The comfort of a true friend in a time of trouble, the strength we sense in being with someone who truly knows us, the affirmation of life that comes with enduring friendships - no other experience is like these. Recovery, once our addictive behaviors end, is mostly through relationships. In this program we are developing a friendship with ourselves, with other men and women, and with our Higher Power. True friendship happens when we lower our guard and let our feelings show. It happens when we listen without judgment. It accumulates over time in many little experiences with someone. There is friendship in returning to someone when we feel offended or hurt so the relationship can be repaired - and in returning to him when we have been the offender. Sometimes friendship means humility, or accepting our worthiness to be forgiven. The development and deepening of our friendships, with other men, with women, and with ourselves sustains us in recovery. Today, I will be true in my friendships. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. A woman who is loved always has success. --Vicki Baum Being loved, and knowing that we are loved, assures us of our connection to the world outside of ourselves. It affirms us as participants in the bigger picture. And all of us need to know that we count--that what we say and do matters to others--that we are contributing in an important way. Often we feel unloved, however. And we search for love. We may have begged for love and still didn't feel it. We have probably become very self-centered in our search. Fortunately, the program helps us to give love to others; the paradox is that love is returned, tenfold. The wonders of love are many. Love is a healing balm for wounds. And it nurtures, both the one loving and the one loved. Love is an energizer. It spurs us on to successes in work and in play. Love multiplies. If we aren't feeling loved, we can love someone else--and love will visit us, too. We can help the women in our lives find the successes they deserve. The confidence to tackle new situations is packaged in the gift of love. We need to help one another count. My love of another is a contributing factor in her success. Her loving gratitude will enhance my own endeavors. I will take a moment, today, with a friend who needs my love. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Empowering You can think. You can feel. You can solve your problems. You can take care of yourself. Those words have often benefited me more than the most profound and elaborate advice. How easy it is to fall into the trap of doubting others and ourselves. When someone tells us about a problem, what is our reaction? Do we believe we need to solve it for the person? Do we believe that that persons future rests on our ability to advise him or her? Thats standing on shaky ground - not the stuff of which recovery is made. When someone is struggling through a feeling, or a morass of feelings, what is our reaction? That the person will never survive that experience? That its not okay for someone to feel? That he or she will never get through this intact? When a person is faced with the task of assuming responsibility for their life and behaviors, what is our response? That the person cant do that? I must do it myself to save him or her from dissipating into ashes? From crumbling? From failing? What is our reaction to ourselves when we encounter a problem, a feeling, or when we face the prospect of assuming responsibility for ourselves? Do we believe in others and ourselves? Do we give power to people - including ourselves - and their abilities? Or do we give the power to the problem, the feeling, or the irresponsibility? We can learn to check ourselves out. We can learn to think, and consider our response, before we respond. Im sorry youre having that problem. I know you can figure out a solution. Sounds like youve got some feelings going on. I know youll work through them and come out on the other side. Each of us is responsible for ourselves. That does not mean we dont care. It does not mean a cold, calculated withdrawal of our support from others. It means we learn to love and support people in ways that work. It means we learn to love and support ourselves in ways that work. It means that we connect with friends who love and support us in ways that work. To believe in people, to believe in each persons inherent ability to think, feel, solve problems, and take care of themselves is a great gift we can give and receive from others. Today, I will strive to give and receive support that is pure and empowering. I will work at believing in myself and others - and our mutual abilities to be competent at dealing with feelings, solving problems, and taking responsibility for ourselves. Today I know I have a right to be alive and happy and full of joy. Today I trust that I am where I am supposed to be, and am moving in the right direction. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Cherish Hope It was a beautiful city in Idaho. The lake that ran alongside the highway was so clear and blue, I pulled the jeep to the roadside just to stop and stare. The air was clear. The city felt light, airy, buoyant. It’s name was hope. I didn’t stay long. I didn’t need to. But I needed to drive by, drive through, pause for a moment to remember another important power to discover and cherish on our journey. Hope is airy, almost intangible, yet if we don’t have it, we know it. Hope is simple. Clear. Light. Our hearts, our souls, need a good glimpse of it every so often, just to keep us going. Even those times we can’t have what we want, we can be open to seeing its light shining unexpectedly in another direction, like this small town that caught my eye. Cherish hope. It adds buoyancy to the spirit, lightness to the day. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Don’t avoid the void I was sitting at dinner with a group of friends in a restaurant one evening. Everyone but one person was done eating. Feet were shuffling under the table. We were ready to go. One member of the group, an older woman, was picking at her meal. She had ordered dessert, but hadn’t eaten it yet. Instead, she slowly sipped her coffee. “I don’t eat my dessert until I’ve finished coffee,” she said. when the waiter asked if he could take her plate. All eyes at the table watched as she took a tiny sip, placed the cup down, and chattered, telling stories and jokes, making meaningless conversation. We watched eagerly as she started to pick her fork up to take a bite of dessert, then sighed quietly as she changed her mind, set the fork down, and began to tell another story. She was alone, widowed, and her children lived in another state. It was obvious that she was trying to stretch dinner out with her friends as long as she could. She was trying to fill up that empty, silent place we call the void. There’s a lot of talk in life and in this book about doing, achieving, and going for what we want. There’s much spurring on to activity that shouts, “Yes, I’m alive. And I’m fully and richly living my life the best I can.” In all the busyness and living, there needs to be mindfulness and careful attention paid to another part of life, too. That part is the repetitive and natural cycle that some people call “the void.” It’s an empty space in our lives. The void can be a small space in our lives– lasting a few days or weeks. Or it can go on longer. That relationship has ended. We’re alone. We don’t know what to do next. Or that cycle in our lives has ended– maybe we’ve graduated from school or college, and we don’t know where to go next. Maybe our time as a parent has ended. Maybe someone we loved, a roommate or best friend, who was an important part of our lives has moved away. Don’t be afraid of the void. Postpone it for a while, if you must. Linger at dinner with friends, refusing to finish your dessert. As dark, cold, and empty as it feels, the void is a friendly place. Its rhythms are slower and often more confusing than other cycles in our lives, but the rhythms of this cycle are still there. Remember those quiet times in your life, the ones you’ve gone through before, when one cycle has ended and another has not yet begun. Remind yourself when that void comes along that you don’t have to be frightened of it. It’s not the end. It’s only a creative and necessary pause, a cycle of its own, in the cycles and rhythms of life. God, give me the courage to step into the void in my life with dignity, faith, and a sense of humor. Help me cherish the unknown as much as I enjoy activity and clarity. ****************************************** In God’s Care You have to have a talent for having talent. ~~Ruth Gordon Each of us brings different gifts along on our journey. We all have a variety of talents We don’t however, always know how to use them. Some people seem to know how to put their talents to good use. Many of us botch them until we get help from God, who gave them to us. Each of our talents has a purpose. We weren’t given them by accident. We all have talents. And, of course, combinations of talents. But we don’t live up to our potential without God’s direction. I put my talents in God’s hands so that I can live at full capacity. ****************************************** Permission To Feel Pushing Away Emotions Throughout our lives, we may experience emotions that disturb or distress us. Often, our first reaction is to push our feelings away. We may say, “I don’t want to think about that right now, I’ll think about it later” and we bury our emotions, deny the validity of our feelings, or distract ourselves with other concerns. But the diverse emotions you experience are neither good nor bad—they are simply a part being human. Choosing not to experience pain, anger, or other intense feelings could cause those feelings to become buried deep into your physical body. There, they may linger unresolved and unable to emerge, even as they affect the way you experience the world. Allowing yourself to experience all of your emotions rather than push the more painful ones away can help you come to terms with your feelings so you can experience them and then move on. It is possible to bring forth the old feelings you have pushed aside and experience them in a safe and enriching way. It may sound silly to set aside time to feel your old wounds that you haven’t dealt with, but this can be a very beneficial healing experience. Find a safel place and pick a time when you can be alone. Make sure that you feel secure and comfortable in your surroundings. Bring to mind the circumstances that originally triggered the emotions you’ve been pushing away. You may need to revisit these circumstances by reading relevant entries in your journal or using visualization to relive your past. Once you have triggered your long-denied emotions, let yourself feel your feelings, and try not to judge your reactions. Cry or sound your emotions if you need to, and don’t block the flow of your feelings. Allow any thoughts that are connected to your emotions to surface. As you release the feelings you have pushed inside of you, you will find yourself healing from ! the experience associated with these emotions. When you deal with your feelings directly, they can move through you rather than staying stopped up in your body as emotional blocks that can sometimes turn into disease. Acknowledging your emotions, instead of pushing them away, allows you to stay emotionally healthy and in touch with your feelings. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “Lead us not into temptation,” we pray, for we know with certainty that temptation lurks around the corner. Temptation is cunning, baffling, powerful — and patient: we never know when it will catch us with our guard down. Temptation could come in the siren song of a four-color advertisement, the fragment of a half-remembered song or, more obviously, in the direct urgings of another person. We must remain forever vigilant, remembering that the first drink gets us drunk, that the first obsessive bite will likely trigger an overeating orgy, that the first roll of the dice could well destroy our lives. Am I aware of my number one priority? Today I Pray God, lead me out of temptation — whether it is the jolly-but-alcoholic abandon of my peers at a special-occasion celebration, the pressure from my friends to “get in the spirit” of a party, the familiar aura of an apartment where joints are passed around, the sound of rattling dice, the smell of a bakery. May I know the limits of my resistance and stay well within them. May my surrender to the will of God give a whole new meaning to that old phrase, “Get in the spirit.” Today I Will Remember Get in the spirit. ****************************************** One More Day Time is lost when we have not lived a full of human life, time enriched by experience, creative endeavor, enjoyment, and suffering. – Dietrich Bonhoeffer “I’ll never make it through today!” While we all may have had that thought from time to time, we did live through that day to rise the next morning and greet the new day. Time can go by very slowly when we are thinking of one but ourselves. Sometimes we can feel overwhelmed by fear of an uncertain future. We may even feel that we have been deserted by our friends and family in a time of need. When overwhelmed with these helpless feelings, we can turn to our Higher Power for comfort and understanding. Knowing we don’t have to work through the details of our lives alone not only comforts us, it fills our minutes and days with positive thoughts and actions. My Higher Power lends me strength to carry me through. ************************************ Food For Thought Vulnerability When we stop doping ourselves with unnecessary food, we become vulnerable. We have been using extra food as a defense against our feelings. Without it, fears and anxieties surface and new energies are released. Instead of retreating into the refrigerator, we can learn day by day how to live with our exposed selves. Making an overture of friendship to someone we would like to know better involves the risk of rejection. Saying no to a family member when a request conflicts with our program may make us feel guilty. Asking for help when we need it means admitting our weakness. Exposing our needs destroys our facade of self-sufficiency. To be vulnerable requires courage, but only as we are able to live without the defense of overeating are we able to grow emotionally and spiritually. When we stop turning to food to cover up our feelings and needs, we are able to be more open with other people. We are nourished by them and by the Higher Power who allays our fears and directs our new energies. May I not fear being vulnerable. ***************************************** One Day At A Time PAIN AND PRETENDING "To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering." Friedrich Nietzsche I love to walk in the woods. The silent serenity of shadowed sunlight; the soft bounce of scattered needles under my feet; and the cool, clear air breathe peace into my soul. I’ve long been fascinated by “nurse logs” – those aged, fallen pines who serve as fertile sustenance for younger, healthy trees. When I look back at my life I see so much death. I see wasted years of hiding, lying, pretending -- years of wrapping myself in my sickness. I have held my disease close to me. At first it seemed to bring safety, but I came to find that it was actually a death shroud. I wondered how any good could ever come from my years of pain. After entering Recovery and working the Program, I have come to see that Nothing Is Wasted. Every sorrow, every injury, and every failure have brought me to this fruitful forest of New Life. Had I never suffered, I would never have found the Serenity that comes from choosing Gratitude. Had my life been easy, I would not have the appreciation I have gained for each new day. No one values safety, peace, and growth quite so profoundly as do those who have lived without them for so very long. As I keep my mind, heart, and perspective focused on God, growth, and life, I find that my pain has become a nurse log; rich with all that is needed to bring life where once was only death. One day at a time . . . I will remember that nothing is wasted. I will choose to appreciate the pain and wisdom of the God-given nurse log which feeds me with hope and peace. Lisa V ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote If he is sincerely interested and wants to see you again, ask him to read this book in the interval. After doing that, he must decide for himself whether he wants to go on. He should not be pushed or prodded by you, his wife, or his friends. If he is to find God, the desire must come from within. - Pg. 95 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote You have a monumental task ahead to set your world in order at the same moment that it has completely changed. Setting your world in order does not mean to 'fix' everybody around you and take care of their affairs. It means to improve and tend to yourself and your affairs. Do not confuse 'setting things in order' with controlling the world around you. I do not attempt to control what is clearly beyond my sphere. I let my Higher Power tend to the world around me. I affect change from within. Gathering Wisdom I am on a spiritual journey. And on this journey I am my own best pilot and my own best philosopher. No one knows me as I know me and no one can synthesize all of the information that I receive each day into a coherent picture of my life as well as I can. If I don't take charge of my journey, no one else will, no one else can. God has given me to me to take care of. I have been put in charge of my own self. I am the one who steers me through my day, who makes a myriad of tiny decisions that add up to a life. I am the eyes and ears behind each hour. I am the choice maker. My life is up to me. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Opportunities are often disguised as problems and this is why we miss them. With the next problem you encounter, ask, 'What can I learn from this?' I watch for big problems; they disguise big opportunities. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book When you see 'CRAZY' coming, hurry up and cross the street! Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know I have the right be alive and happy and full of joy. Today I trust that I am where I'm supposed to be, and am moving in the right direction. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I know I've been spared from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. I know today that it's a miracle standing up here in front of you. I know it. - JoJo S.
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Daily Reflections REAL INDEPENDENCE The more we become willing to depend upon a Higher Power, the more independent we actually are. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 36 I start with a little willingness to trust God and He causes that willingness to grow. The more willingness I have, the more trust I gain, and the more trust I gain, the more willingness I have. My dependence on God grows as my trust in Him grows. Before I became willing, I depended on myself for all my needs and I was restricted by my incompleteness. Through my willingness to depend upon my Higher Power, whom I choose to call God, all my needs are provided for by Someone Who knows me better than I know myself - even the needs I may not realize, as well as the ones yet to come, bring me to be myself and to help me fill the need in someone else that only I am meant to fill. There never will be another exactly like me. And that is real independence. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When alcoholics first come into A.A. and we face the fact that we must spend the rest of our life without liquor, it often seems like an impossibility for us. So A.A. tells us to forget about the future and take it one day at a time. All we really have is now. We have no past time and no future time. As the saying goes: "Yesterday is gone, forget it; tomorrow never comes, don't worry; today is here, get busy." All we have is the present. The past is gone forever and the future never comes. When tomorrow gets here, it will be today. Am I living one day at a time? Meditation For The Day Persistence is necessary if you are to advance in spiritual things. By persistent prayer, persistent firm and simple trust, you achieve the treasures of the spirit. By persistent practice, you can eventually obtain joy, peace, assurance, security, health, happiness and serenity. Nothing is too great, in the spiritual realm, for you to obtain, if you persistently prepare yourself for it. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may persistently carry out my spiritual exercises every day. I pray that I may strive for peace and serenity. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It R.S.V.P.--Yes or No?, p. 77 Usually, we do not avoid a place where there is drinking--if we have a legitimate reason for being there. That includes bars, night clubs, dances, receptions, weddings, even plain ordinary parties. You will note that we made an important qualification. Therefore, ask yourself, "Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little vicarious pleasure from the atmosphere?" Then go or stay away, whichever seems better. But be sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive in going is thoroughly good. Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it. If you are shaky, you had better work with another alcoholic instead! Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 101-102 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Should everybody like me? Personal Relations. In AA discussions, the term "people pleasers" doesn't fare very well. When people say they are people-pleasers, they're acknowledging that it's also a problem It's a problem because it reflects a desire to have everybody's acceptance and approval…… to be universally liked. But from what we know about human relationships, this is not possible. No matter how hard we work to be pleasant and likable, some people may still detest us for reasons we cannot understand. When that happens, we should not blame ourselves or step up our efforts to them and to avoid giving offense in any way, while accepting the fact that they do not like us. If our own behavior is mature and reasonable, even the people who don't like us will at least respect us. That may be the best we can hope for , and it is certainly far better than shameless people pleasing. In the end, people-pleasers don't please anybody and, as a famous comedian notes about himself, they "get no respect." I'll try hard to be pleasant and cordial to everyone I meet today. If some people do not respond in the same way. I'll accept this without feeling hurt or betrayed. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Money cost to much.---Ross MacDonald Many people are poor and really need money to live better. But we're in trouble if we think money will solve all our problems. If money solved all problems, all rich people would be happy. Consider this: A man talks about his shortcomings in a Twelve Step meeting. He says his main shortcoming is to think being happy means having enough money. But then he says that he has over a million dollars! This man is lucky---not because he has money, but because he knows greed is a shortcoming. He knows he has a spiritual problem. He doesn't need money; he needs faith in a Higher Power. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to really believe I'll be given what I need. This will free me to get on with life. Action for the Day: Today, I'll read over the promises of the program. They are found at the bottom of page 83 at the top of the page of page 84 in the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Noble deeds and hot baths are the best cures for depression. --Dodie Smith Depression feeds on itself. With attention it worsens, but there are places for our attention. We can move our focus to a woman who is close by, a woman who is struggling to determine her direction in life. We can offer our ears. Or we can observe attentively, today, all the women, children, and men we see on the streets. When we notice their expressions, we realize they, too, may be suffering. Doing something for someone else will lessen our own problems, no matter what the cause. In fact, just doing something will lift our spirits. Depression becomes habitual, and habits, even those that are detrimental, are easy to hang onto. When we take an action, even a small one, we can note the change: Action that benefits another is guaranteed to benefit us as well. Depression does get worse with self-pitying attention; however, attention to ourselves that is nurturing has its place. We can pamper ourselves, but not pity ourselves. Pampering reflects approval, caring, self-respect; three attitudes inconsistent with depression. Even more than inconsistent, pampering and depression are incongruent. Depression must be coddled to maintain it. It's my choice to move beyond it at any moment. I can put something besides my problem at my center today and enjoy the results. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others, so never hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful. You should not hesitate to visit the most sordid spot on earth on such an errand. Keep on the firing line of life with these motives and God will keep you unharmed. p. 102 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. I worked in the steel mill for possibly two months, and then I became disgusted with myself and decided to go back home. I think the thing that galled me was that just after Easter I had drawn my salary for two weeks' work and had decided that I was going to send some money to Vi; and above all else was going to send my baby daughter an Easter outfit. But there happened to be a liquor store between the post office and the mill, and i stopped to ge that one drink. Of course, the kid never got the Easter outfit. I got very little out of the two hundred that I drew on that payday. pp. 241-242 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Few people have been more victimized by resentments than have we alcoholics. It mattered little whether our resentments were justified or not. A burst of temper could spoil a day, and a well-nursed grudge could make us miserably ineffective. Nor were we ever skillful in separating justified from unjustified anger. As we saw it, our wrath was always justified. Anger, that occasional luxury of more balanced people, could keep us on an emotional jag indefinitely. These emotional "dry benders" often led straight to the bottle. Other kinds of disturbances--jealousy, envy, self-pity, or hurt pride--did the same thing. p. 90 ************************************************** ********* Today, God, help me know I am being guided into what's good about life, especially when I feel confused and without direction. Help me trust enough to wait until my mind and vision are clear and consistent. Help me know that clarity will come. --Melody Beattie "The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches, but reveal to them their own." -- Disraeli I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship. -- Louisa May Alcott We can be whole persons, even if we are not physically healthy. --Bonnie Marie Tincher I am always willing to learn, however I do not always like to be taught. --Winston Churchill Faith and Love mixed with Works is so important for a person to not lose Hope. --Sprintin ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation HUMOR "Humor may be defined as the kindly contemplation of the incongruities of life and the artistic impression thereof . . . The essence of humor is human kindliness." -- Stephen Leacock Humor for me is a key to balance. In the joke I am able to release some tension or frustration and cope with my disease of alcoholism. When I drank, I did not have a genuine sense of humor --- rather it was sarcasm, cruel "put-downs" or insane expressions of my manic personality. My fun was created at the expense of others. It was a form of violence. It kept people away from me and created a loneliness in my life. Today I seek to use humor as an expression of acceptance, tolerance, understanding and forgiveness. Humor is an aspect of my spiritual program. In humor I experience God. Give me the gift of humor that reflects the dignity and hope for us all. ************************************************** ********* In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me? Psalms 56:4 Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me, for in you my soul takes refuge. I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the disaster has passed. Psalms 57:1 Paul wrote, "I can do all things through [Christ] who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration When God answers prayer, He gives us the right answer. Lord, my greatest strength comes when I trust in You. Have the strength to do what is right regardless of the consequences. Lord, show me Your way so that I may walk in Your truth. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Full Message "There is a special feeling for addicts when they discover that there are other people who share their difficulties, past and present." Basic Text p. 53 The wealth of our recovery is too good to keep to ourselves. Some of us believe that when we talk in meetings, we should "remember the newcomer" and always try to carry a positive message. But sometimes the most positive message we can carry is that we are going through difficult times in our recovery and are staying clean in spite of them! Yes, it's gratifying to send out a strong message of hope to our newer members. After all, no one likes a whiner. But distressing things happen, and life on life's terms can send shock waves even through the recovery of long-time members of Narcotics Anonymous. If we are equipped with the tools of the program, we can walk through such turmoil and stay clean to tell the tale. Recovery doesn't happen all at once; it is an ongoing process, sometimes a struggle. When we dilute the fullness of our message by neglecting to share about the tough times we may walk through on our journey, we fail to allow newcomers the chance to see that they, too, can stay clean, no matter what. If we share the full message of our recovery, we may not know who benefits, but we can be sure someone will. Just for today: I will honestly share both the good times and the difficult times of my recovery. I will remember that my experience in walking through adversity may benefit another member. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Tyger, Tyger, burning bright, In the forests of the night; What immortal hand or eye, Could frame thy fearful symmetry? Did He who made the Lamb make thee? --William Blake Is there a lamb and a tiger inside us? Is there any commandment, written on the sky or a stone tablet, denying us our perfect right to be both tiger and lamb? The tiger, beast made of fire and night, shows its teeth when it blazes with love; the lamb, orphan wrapped in soft blanket of cloud, weeps to receive that same love. So we give and take, are strong and weak, guilty and innocent, wrong and right. So we are balanced, even when we seem to be in conflict. When we learn to accept all the things we can be, we will be able to love all the ways the world outside us can be. What conflict is helping me grow today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Oh, that one could learn to learn in time! --Enrique Solari A mark of genuine change, after the pleasure of newfound growth, may be the regret a man feels that he didn't learn sooner. When we learn something new, we see how it could have made our life better at an earlier time. We regret being stubborn, immature, or impulsive. Now we see our mistakes in a new light and it hurts. This is one of the pains of change. Some people turn away from growth because they refuse to tolerate the pain of honest hindsight. We need to face these regrets, but not indulge in them. We take a bow to the past and move on to live in the only place we can - the present. We can acknowledge our guilt and remorse and then turn them over to the care of God. We can't change the past, but we can learn from it. Healthy recovery means an ever lighter load of regrets. Getting stuck in guilt over past deeds only repeats our mistakes by failing to use our learning today. May I acknowledge and let go of my griefs and regrets so I can attend to life here and now. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Noble deeds and hot baths are the best cures for depression. --Dodie Smith Depression feeds on itself. With attention it worsens, but there are places for our attention. We can move our focus to a woman who is close by, a woman who is struggling to determine her direction in life. We can offer our ears. Or we can observe attentively, today, all the women, children, and men we see on the streets. When we notice their expressions, we realize they, too, may be suffering. Doing something for someone else will lessen our own problems, no matter what the cause. In fact, just doing something will lift our spirits. Depression becomes habitual, and habits, even those that are detrimental, are easy to hang onto. When we take an action, even a small one, we can note the change: Action that benefits another is guaranteed to benefit us as well. Depression does get worse with self-pitying attention; however, attention to ourselves that is nurturing has its place. We can pamper ourselves, but not pity ourselves. Pampering reflects approval, caring, self-respect; three attitudes inconsistent with depression. Even more than inconsistent, pampering and depression are incongruent. Depression must be coddled to maintain it. It's my choice to move beyond it at any moment. I can put something besides my problem at my center today and enjoy the results. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Safety One of the long-term effects of living in a dysfunctional family - as children or adults - is that we don't feel safe. Much of what we call codependency happens because we don't feel safe in relationships. This can cause us to control, obsess, or focus on the other person, while neglecting ourselves or shutting down our feelings. We can learn to make ourselves feel safe and comfortable, as part of a nurturing, loving attitude toward ourselves. Often, we get a feeling of safety and comfort when we attend Twelve Step meetings or support groups. Being with a friend or doing something nice for ourselves helps us feel protected and loved. Sometimes, reaching out to another person helps us feel safe. Prayer and meditation help us affirm that our Higher Power cares for us. We are safe now. We can relax. Perhaps others haven't been there for us in a consistent, trustworthy way, but we are learning to be there for ourselves. Today, I will concentrate on making myself feel safe and comfortable. Today I will be part of the mainstream of life. I will share what I have when it can be useful, looking for opportunities to give to others the best of who I am. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Heart Connections I went into the office at the lodge where I stayed in Sedona. I turned in my room key, then pulled out my camera and took a picture of Marianne. We had only known each other for eight days, but I felt deeply connected to her. We had been through a series of experiences that would probably stay with me for life. They had changed my life. When we hugged and said good-bye, I told her not to cry– but she did anyway. So did I. “Call me whenever you want,” she said. “I’ll be there for you.” I knew what she meant. She didn’t mean for me to call her on the phone, although that was okay,too. She meant call her in my heart, call her to me in spirit. For a long time, our connections to people and places may have come from someplace other than our hearts. We may have been connected out of need, fear, unfinished business, or simply the unwillingness to leave– to know there was any other way to be connected. Or we may not have even felt particularly connected to the people around us. Now is a different time. It is time now to let your connections come from your heart. Open up. Listen. Does someone have something to say, maybe only a sentence or two, that’s just what you need to hear? As you’re going through your day, does someone come to mind, someone you think about getting in touch with? Don’t shrug off the things you know and sense. Be open to your inner voice. Do what it leads you to do. Love isn’t bound by time or space when our connections come from our heart. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Prayer helps “Sometimes I talk myself out of praying,” Sheila said. “I convince myself that it’s just more work, because even if I pray about something, I have to do all the work,too.” I sit down to write. The energy’s not there, but the deadline is. God, please help. I remember a joke I heard from someone, somewhere: “I love deadlines. Especially the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.” I write anyway, putting one word in front of another. Then, from out of nowhere, comes a string of words I didn’t plan on, a new idea, a fresh perspective, a story, complete with ending. Wow! Where’d that come from? An issue comes up in a relationship with a friend. He’s hurt and angry. His hurt and anger evoke more hurt and anger in me. I try to reason things out, listen to him, get him to see things my way. He feels justified. So do I. day after day, we work on the relationship. The strain continues. I don’t know what to do next. “God, please help me with this situation. Show me what to do next.” I keep talking to my friend. He keeps talking to me. Then one day, I feel less defensive and guilty. A new feeling surrounds the relationship. “I’m sorry,” I say one day. “So am I,” he says,too. Wow, I think. Where did that come from? I stand on the scale, glaring at the numbers. I want to lose ten pounds. I start eating less, exercising more. A few days later, I get on the scale again. Dang. Gained a pound. I continue to eat less; the numbers don’t move. God, please help me drop this weight. Why am I holding on to it? I continue to watch my caloric intake and pay attention to exercise. One morning I get on the scale. Wow! I’ve lost five pounds. How did that happen? Pray. let go. Then act as if you need to do all the work. Don’t plan on magic and miracles. But leave room for them,too. God, help me remember that when I run out of myself, I run right into you. ****************************************** In God’s Care The most exhausting thing in life…is being insincere. ~~Anne Morrow Lindbergh The time-worn statement “Honesty is the best policy” holds special meaning to those of us in the program. Being honest with ourselves and with others is paramount to our recovery. But it’s also important for us to define our honesty. Should we tell people that we don’t like them? Should we confess trangressions from past years if it hurts a loved one today? We each have to decide what honest means in different situations. Not acting or responding in accordance with our anxiety, particularly if we let that wisdome guide us in one instance and not the next. We’ll know a deeper level of serenity when we decide to be consistently honest and sincere with our companions. A moment’s pause to let our Higher Power guide us will help us decide the best response for each situation. I will seek God’s guidance as I learn to be more honest today. ****************************************** Detoxing Your Body Inner Spring Cleaning by Madisyn Taylor All of our bodies need to detox once in a while and is a wonderful gift to your body, mind and spirit. When you want to start with a clean slate in life, one way is to cleanse your body. Detoxifying can be done in many ways and for many reasons, depending on your specific goals. You may feel a physical need for cleansing, or a spiritual one where you would cleanse the areas of the body that correspond to your current life challenges. If you feel, for instance, that your inner self is not shining through as you would like, you may want to do a bathing detox to clean the skin of impurities so that you can radiate your inner health like a newly washed stained-glass window that lets the light shine through more brilliantly. No matter how healthy and conscious our habits are, our bodies move with the cycles of life, which means that our cells sometimes need to fall like leaves from the trees before they can regenerate and be renewed. Just as we need to wash our bodies to remove the buildup of natural processes and contact with the world around us, we need to clean our bodies from the inside as well. So you may want to detoxify your blood or digestive system, or target specific buildup such as plaque or metals. Our bodies are the vessels that allow us to move through life, but we can treat them like wild gardens that need our attention to reach their full potential of beauty and balance in their ecosystem. The first days of a detoxification process may bring to mind an image of the dust that gets stirred up during spring cleaning. You may feel a little worse before you feel better, but that may indeed be the universe’s way of showing us the benefits by contrast. We live in a world of dualities, so we may need to experience both sides of a situation in order to find our perfect balance. Once the impurities have been cleansed, you could experience a sense of lightness or clarity of vision and purpose. You will know it worked when you feel enhanced ease as you move through the world toward your goals. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day In the old days, we often had such devastating experiences that we fervently swore, “never again.” We were absolutely sincere in those moments of desperation. Yet, despite our intentions, the outcome was inevitably the same. Eventually, the memory of our suffering faded, as did the memory of our “pledge.” so we did it again, ending up in even worse shape than when we had last “sworn off,m” Forever turned out to be only a week, or a day or less. In The Program, we learn that we need only be concerned about today, this particular 24-hour period. Do I live my life just 24 hours at a time? Today I Pray May the long-term requirements of such phrases as “never again, ” “not on your life,” “forever,” “I’ll never take another..” not weaken my resolve. “Forever,” when it is broken down into single days — or even just parts of days — does not seem to impossible long. May I awake each day with my goal set realistically at just 24 hours. Today I Will Remember Twenty -four hours at a time. ****************************************** One More Day An ordinary man can surround himself with two thousand books … and thenceforward have at least one place in the world in which it is possible to be happy. – Augustine Birrell A flashlight. A winter storm. Secretly reading under the covers. As children, most of us escaped into books from time to time. Books were a private experience shared with no one. They could also be a warm family time of sharing. Books will provide a window to the world, to adventures and faraway places that few people ever experience firsthand. Regardless of physical ability — or disability — we can generally find a way to read or listen to a book. We can shed, for a short while, some of the frustrations we experience. We can forget the ravages of illness. We can travel. We can dream. Reading is a true gift which I can give myself. ************************************ Food For Thought A New World Being abstinent puts us into a new world. Instead of trying to cheat ourselves and get away with it, we learn to be straight with ourselves and others. Instead of escaping problems, we learn to face them honestly. Instead of despair, we feel self-respect and a developing self-confidence. As we get rid of our obsession with food, we get in touch with our feelings and abilities so that we are able to function calmly and efficiently. All of this does not happen overnight. We take the Twelve Steps under the guidance of a program sponsor. We work our program every day. We continue to use the telephone and go to meetings so that we may learn from other members. Above all, we maintain contact with our Higher Power, since it is by His grace that we have entered this new world. Thank You, Lord, for leading me to a new world. ***************************************** One Day At A Time EXAMPLE "Setting an example is not the main means of influencing another. It is the only means." Albert Einstein Program's philosophy dictates that we gain new members by attraction rather than promotion. We should be striving to become living embodiments of Program principles in order that we might attract and inspire those in need whom we may encounter in our daily lives - just as we were fortunate enough to find our way here because of the amazing effort, inspiration and example of the Program founders. Because of their blood, sweat and tears, Program has grown in leaps and bounds over the years . Now - its future growth rests with us. Are you prepared for this responsibility? One Day at a Time . . . I will diligently work the tools of my program and be a shining example of recovery to others. Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The tremendous fact for every one of us is that we have discovered a common solution. We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. This is the great news this book carries to those who suffer from alcoholism. - Pg. 17 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote At times we get sudden feelings of fear and apprehension. They seem to spring from nowhere. This is a common reaction to the chemicals leaving our body--it often is purely biological and nothing to be concerned with. Simply call a clean and sober friend. Let me know that not all fear and apprehension come from deep-seated traumas. Some are simply physical reactions to withdrawal. Lighting My Own Lamp I will learn to light my own lamp today. I will go within for the deepest sort of experience of joy, of ecstasy in being alive. I will get in touch with the deeper pulse of living - the thread that connects me with the divine experience. I will recognize that in order to be lit from within I need to drop down inside of myself and be in the presence of inner light. Life itself has a purpose apart from any individual task or stage. Life itself is the experience. All of the things I have been trying to accomplish are both inner and outer goals. They are meant to bring me closer to myself, to develop me in ways that allow me to experience life more fully - to be more capable of pleasure. Today I will give myself these gifts of inner sight. I will find and live from my own inner light. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote They say you need newcomers to tell you where you came from, old-timers to tell you where you could go, and a sponsor to tell you where you are at. The most important word in my Steps is the first one... 'WE'. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The bigger the secret, the more dangerous. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will be part of the mainstream of life. I will share what I have when it can be useful, looking for opportunities to give to others the best of who I am. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote A smooth sea never made a good sailor. - Anon.
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March 19
Daily Reflections PRAYER: IT WORKS It has been well said that "almost the only scoffers at prayer are those who never tried it enough." TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 97 Having grown up in an agnostic household, I felt somewhat foolish when I first tried praying. I knew there was a Higher Power working in my life -- how else was I staying sober? -- but I certainly wasn't convinced he/she/it wanted to hear my prayers. People who had what I wanted said prayer was an important part of practicing the program, so I persevered. With a commitment to daily prayer, I was amazed to find myself becoming more serene and comfortable with my place in the world. In other words, life became easier and less of a struggle. I'm still not sure who, or what, listens to my prayers, but I'd never stop saying them for the simple reason that they work. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When we were drinking, we used to be ashamed of the past. Remorse is terrible mental punishment: ashamed of ourselves for the things we've said and done, afraid to face people because of what they might think of us, afraid of the consequences of what we did when we were drunk. In A.A. we forget about the past. Do I believe that God has forgiven me for everything I've done in the past, no matter how black it was, provided I'm honestly trying to do the right thing today? Meditation For The Day God's spirit is all about you all day long. You have no thoughts, no plans, no impulses, no emotions, that He does not know about. You can hide nothing from Him. Do not make your conduct conform only to that of the world and do not depend on the approval or disapproval of others. God sees in secret, but He rewards openly. If you are in harmony with the Divine Spirit, doing your best to live the way you believe God wants you to live, you will be at peace. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may always feel God's presence. I pray that I may realize this Presence constantly all through the day. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Clearing A Channel, p. 78 During the day, we can pause where situations must be met and decisions made, and renew the simple request "Thy will, not mine, be done." If at these points our emotional disturbances happens to be great, we will more surely keep our balance provided we remember, and repeat to ourselves, a particular prayer or phrase that has appealed to us in our reading or meditation. Just saying it over and over will often enable us to clear a channel choked up with anger, fear, frustration, or misunderstanding, and permit us to return to the surest help of all--our search for God's will, not our own, in the moment of stress. 12 & 12, pp. 102-103 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Where is God? Guidance. AA members have always had a difficult time explaining the "God business". We didn't want to be considered religious, but at the same time we've always believed some contact with a Higher Power is necessary for real personal growth. There's nothing wrong… for our purposes… in simply visualizing God as a Higher Power that has always been within us and around us. "Before they call, I will answer," goes an old saying, and that was true even in our darkest days. Many of us also believe that a higher power helped bring AA into being and move it along to become a worldwide force for good. But God works in ways that can seem to come from change or coincidence. Quite often, we'll find that little events had far-reaching results in our lives. When we review how such things happened, we should not conclude that this happens only to certain "special" people. All human beings are part of God's creation and can avail themselves of guidance and direction. The more serious problem is that guidance and direction are sometimes ignored or rejected. I'll go about my affairs today with the knowledge that my Higher Power is making the important decisions in my life. I'll come out about where God wants me to be. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Speak when you're angry and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret. Lawrence J. Peter When we used alcohol or other drugs, most of us were hotheads. We thought we were right. If we were proven wrong, we may have made life hell for everyone. People knew enough to stay away from us. In recovery, things will still go badly at times. We'll get hurt. And we'll get angry. But now, we turn our anger to our Higher Power. In our groups, we talk about what makes us angry. Then we leave the anger behind when the meeting is over. We find that being at peace is now more important than getting even. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, when I'm angry, help me slow down, Help me remember it's okay to be angry, but its not okay to abuse people. Action for the Day: I will remember a time when I turned anger, into rage and hurt someone. I will also remember a time I was angry in a respectful way. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning I realized a long time ago that a belief which does not spring from a conviction in the emotions is no belief at all. --Evelyn Scott >From pillar to post we bounced, most of us not knowing what we actually believed about nearly any situation before getting to this program. Perhaps we believed what was most convenient at the time because of the people we were with. And maybe we jumped the fence quickly when in a new setting. Values were sometimes talked about but not defined, and certainly not adhered to. It's difficult to develop a strong sense of self, to have a very secure self-image when the parameters offered by a value system are lacking. Our values define who we are. They offer us direction when making choices. They quietly demand that we behave responsibly. Living in concert with our values brings peace to our souls. Gone are the days when we rode first one fence and then another, never knowing what side of any issue we honestly believed in. The program has offered us a plan for living, a plan that erases the many uncertainties, the inner turmoil of past years. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Many of us keep liquor in our homes. We often need it to carry green recruits through a severe hangover. Some of us still serve it to our friends provided they are not alcoholic. But some of us think we should not serve liquor to anyone. We never argue this question. We feel that each family, in the light of their own circumstances, ought to decide for themselves. pp. 102-103 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. I knew I wasn't capable of keeping the bulk of the money myself, so I gave it to a white fellow who owned the bar I frequented. He kept the money for me, but I worried him to death for it. Finally, I broke the last one hundred dollar bill the Saturday before I left. I got out of that bill one pair of shoes, and the rest of that money was blown. I took the last of it to buy my railroad ticket. p. 242 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." A spot-check inventory taken in the midst of such disturbances can be of very great help in quieting stormy emotions. Today's spot check finds its chief application to situations which arise in each day's march. The consideration of long-standing difficulties had better be postponed, when possible, to times deliberately set aside for that purpose. The quick inventory is aimed at our daily ups and downs, especially those where people or new events throw us off balance and tempt us to make mistakes. pp. 90-91 ************************************************** ********* "All of us, at certain moments of our lives, need to take advice and to receive help from other people." -Alexis Carrel, Reflections on Life Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much. --Helen Keller "If you want to be respected by others, the great thing is to respect yourself." --Fyodor Dostoyevsky "A closed mouth gathers no feet." --Anon. We cannot think our way into sober living. We live our way into sober thinking. We in AA don't carry the alcoholic; we carry the message. Listening feeds the spirit. When I am too busy to pray - I am just too busy. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation MADNESS "Sanity is madness put to good use." -- George Santayana I heard the phrase "make the disease work for you". It made a great deal of sense to me and still does. I am a recovering alcoholic. My alcoholism is still within me and every day I take the necessary steps to stay sober. My disease is that "mad" part of me that wants to destroy my life, relationships and understanding of God. What I need to do is accept my "madness" and turn it around so that it works for me. My suffering is the key to my spiritual growth. My anger and manipulation helps me to understand the imperfections of others. My powerlessness over alcohol give me an understanding of humility that is based on reality. The acceptance of my "madness" keeps me sane! O God, give me the sanity to accept my imperfections so that I can grow into the "best" that I can be. ************************************************** ********* "From the end of the earth I will cry to You, when my heart is overwhelmed; lead me to the rock that is higher than I." Psalms 61:2 Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalms 141:3 Jesus said, "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Believe in God, believe also in me. John 14:1 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration When you meet God in prayer, everything becomes new. Lord, may I be humbly joyful in my faith. Take less for granted and you will become very busy enjoying all that you have. Lord, thank you for my blessings and for all those that I am able to share them with. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Something Valuable To Share "A simple, honest message of recovery from addiction rings true." Basic Text p. 50 You're in a meeting. The sharing has been going on for some time. One or two members have described their spiritual experiences in an especially meaningful way. Another has had us all rolling in the aisles with entertaining stories. And then the leader calls on you.., gulp. You shyly introduce yourself, apologetically stammer out a few lines, thank everyone for listening, and sit out the rest of the meeting in embarrassed silence. Sound familiar? Well, you're not alone. We've all had times when we've felt that what we had to share wasn't spiritual enough, wasn't entertaining enough, wasn't something enough. But sharing is not a competitive sport. The meat of our meetings is identification and experience, something all of us have in abundance. When we share from our hearts the truth of our experience, other addicts feel they can trust us because they know we're just like them. When we simply share what's been effective in our lives, we can be sure that our message will be helpful to others. Our sharing doesn't have to be either fancy or funny to ring true. Every addict working an honest program that brings meaningful recovery has something of immense value to share, something no one else can give: his or her own experience. Just for today: I have something valuable to share. I will attend a meeting today and share my experience in recovery from addiction. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Where is the yesterday that worried us so? --Joan Walsh Anglund In the fairy tale The Last Dream of the Old Oak Tree, the oak tree felt sorry for the day-fly. The day-fly only lives for one day, and the tree was already 365 years old. But the day-fly was so enjoying his one day that the tree's sympathy puzzled him. The day-fly said to the tree, "You may have thousands of my days, but I have thousands of moments to be pleased and happy in." And so the day-fly continued to dance in the sun and smell the clover and honeysuckle. His day ended as happily as he spent it, and he settled down on a blade of grass. If all of us could approach our day the way the day-fly does, as though this were our only day, we would spend less time worrying about yesterday and tomorrow. How can I show my gratitude for the gift of this day? You are reading from the book Touchstones. There seemed not to be another living thing in all the world. There was something of bliss in this stillness, and something ominous too. It was the kind of stillness that beckons us to turn inward, toward the beginnings of our existence. --Paul Gruchow We cannot create profound stillness. We can allow it. We can move into it. We can receive it. Many of us have been frightened by such a stillness because we are not familiar with the spiritual moment. We felt moved, awestruck, and we may have run to escape that inward moment. Some men are endlessly busy just keeping the stillness at a comfortable distance. Many recovering men have unwittingly thrown themselves into a workaholic life because they were frightened by their emerging spirits. We can change this pattern by allowing ourselves a little quiet at a time. At first, it may be just a few minutes alone. We may be more able to meet the stillness outdoors, or we can learn to be still in the presence of someone else. The stillness is a moment of meditation. It is contact with God. God, give me the courage to allow spiritual experiences to be part of my life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. I realized a long time ago that a belief which does not spring from a conviction in the emotions is no belief at all. --Evelyn Scott >From pillar to post we bounced, most of us not knowing what we actually believed about nearly any situation before getting to this program. Perhaps we believed what was most convenient at the time because of the people we were with. And maybe we jumped the fence quickly when in a new setting. Values were sometimes talked about but not defined, and certainly not adhered to. It's difficult to develop a strong sense of self, to have a very secure self-image when the parameters offered by a value system are lacking. Our values define who we are. They offer us direction when making choices. They quietly demand that we behave responsibly. Living in concert with our values brings peace to our souls. Gone are the days when we rode first one fence and then another, never knowing what side of any issue we honestly believed in. The program has offered us a plan for living, a plan that erases the many uncertainties, the inner turmoil of past years. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Staying Out of the Middle I don't want to get in the middle, but . . . is a sign that we may have just stepped into the middle. We do not have to get caught in the middle of other peoples issues, problems, or communication. We can let others take responsibility for themselves in their relationships. We can let them work out their issues with each other. Being a peacemaker does not mean we get in the middle. We are bearers of peace by staying peaceful ourselves and not harboring turmoil. We are peacemakers by not causing the extra chaos created when we get in the middle of other peoples affairs and relationships. Don't get in the middle unless you want to be there. Today, I will refuse to accept any invitations to jump in the middle of others affairs, issues, and relationships. I will trust others to work out their own affairs, including the ideas and feelings they want to communicate to each other. Today will have a clarity about it that I can appreciate. I know who I am. I know what I believe. All I need do is act accordingly. Today I dare to openly express my needs and find healthy ways to get them met. I like feeling good today. I like myself today. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Learn to Heal Yourself Sometimes we trick ourselves. If we feel unhappy, troubled, or scared, we race toward what we think will make us feel better. In desperation, in fear, we grasp for something, anything to stop our pain. Finding that job. Making more money. Getting married. Having a relationship. If I get that one thing I need, then I’ll be happy. Then my pain will stop. Sometimes it’s true that finding the solution to a problem improves the quality of our lives. Having enough money enables us to fix the furnace when it breaks. Having people in our lives we love and who love us can be an important part of our happiness. Having work to do that we enjoy and that we feel is worthwhile helps us feel good about ourselves. But when we’re in pain– no matter what’s causing it– the way to heal that pain doesn’t come from outside of ourselves. External circumstances don’t make internal emotions disappear. Even if we get what we think we want, the painful emotion we haven’t had the strength or courage to face will still be there. The way to heal pain, the only way, is to feel and release it. Your pain is your pain. Your fear, desperation, and resentments are yours, too. All these emotions belong to you. Feel them, learn from them, and let them go. Walk courageously each step of the path on the journey to the heart. Emjoy when the universe sends you its gifts– a lover, some money, a good job. But know the ultimate key to happiness lies not in external things, but within you. Feel all your feelings. Learn to heal yourself. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Lighten up The matter at hand is serious. It’s grave. We need to get serious about the relationship. We need to get serious about the task. Maybe what we really need to do is learn to lighten up. Nations rise and fall, heroes are born and die, the sun rises and sets, and you want me to take seriously the notion that arriving to church wearing the right clothes is going to make any difference at all. What matters is what’s in our hearts. “The reason angels can fly is that they take themselves so lightly,” G.K. Chesterton once wrote. Once you stop taking yourself so seriously and let go of the gravity of all that you do, you can learn to fly,too. God, help me lighten up. ****************************************** Working with Space Intuit Your Home’s Decor by Madisyn Taylor When decorating spaces in your home, allow the space to speak to you by being still and observing each room. When we decide the time has come to change the look or feel of our personal spaces, it is the spaces themselves that can provide us with the most useful guidance. Working with a single room, an apartment, or an entire house allows us to unearth the innate potential of these spaces and also better understand how we want to relate to them. To be conscious of the possibilities of a space, we need to listen to, look at, and bond with that space in a deep and personal way. Just as no two people are alike, no two rooms, however similar, are identical. The more we know about the spaces we wish to change, the better equipped we are to make them both beautiful and functional. Before you contemplate colors and layouts, spend some time in the rooms you plan to modify. Observe the way light moves through each space at different times of day. In the course of a week or so, note those times when you feel drawn to a particular space. You may naturally gravitate toward one room when you want to relax and toward another when you want to socialize. Also, remember that not all rooms have to be used as originally planed, for example a dining room may make a wonderful sitting area. As you make these observations, think about whether the spaces under consideration remind you of anything or bring certain thoughts to mind. Writing your thoughts down can make the process of examination simpler. The discoveries you make regarding the rooms in your home can help guide you as you choose color schemes, furniture layouts, and decorative styles, so that you bring out the natural qualities of each using your creativity and eye for detail. Using the cues you pick up, yo! u can design a beautiful room that is bright and exciting, or one that calms the soul and invites meditation. By treating the layout and décor of your personal spaces in this mindful way, you can honor their natural rhythms while creating a cohesive and comfortable home through which energy can flow unencumbered. The design elements you subsequently choose will work together like the diverse instruments that come together to form a symphony orchestra. Each will resonate harmoniously with the next, ensuring that your home resounds with a lasting message of beauty, serenity, reassurance, and comfort. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I know today that “stopping in fo9r a drink” will never again be — for me — simply killing a few minutes and leaving a luck on the air. In exchange for the first drink, what I’d plunk down now would be my bank account, my family, our home, or car, my job, my sanity, and probably my life. It’s too big a price, and too great a risk. Do you remember your last drunk? Today I Pray May I be strong in the knowledge that God’s spirit is with me at all times. May I learn to feel His presence. May I know that nothing is hidden from Him. Unlike the world which approves or disapproves of my outward behavior, God sees all that I do, think or feel. If I seek to do His will, I can always count on His reward for me — peace of mind. Today I Will Remember God Knows all. ****************************************** One More Day Faith is a holy cause is to a considerable extent a substitute for the lost faith in ourselves. – Eric Hoffer Busy! Busy! Busy! We might feel as though we’re living our lives on a treadmill — always on the go, helping, and giving our time to people and causes. Service and volunteerism can be wonderful ways to help, but only if they augment an already full life. We truly are living on a treadmill if our involvement is an escape from facing our inner-most thought and fears. We are getting nowhere if our outside activities are all we have to wake up for each morning. We begin to change when we honestly face our greatest fears. We can search our personalities to find our vulnerable points and then strive to correct what defects we can. It is then that we regain faith in ourselves and in our abilities. Once I regain faith in myself I can open my heart to help others. ************************************ Food For Thought Strength In the past, we relied on our own strength to get us where we thought we wanted to go. We were afraid, since deep down we knew how weak and undependable our own strength really was. When we turn our lives over, we no longer have to go it alone. We have tapped the limitless reservoir of strength provided by our Higher Power, and when we are operating under His guidance we feel confident. What we could not do ourselves can be done when we admit our weakness and ask for help. Through working the OA program and through closer contact with our Higher Power, we may find that we are going in a new direction. The things we thought we wanted may turn out to be unnecessary, and we may have new goals. Wherever our journey leads, we will have the strength we need, since it does not come from ourselves but from a Power greater than ourselves. I need Your strength, Lord. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Commitment Shallow men believe in luck ~ Strong men believe in cause and effect. Ralph Waldo Emerson Abstinence did not happen for me until I made a commitment to it. I realized that I would have abstinence until something was a bit too uncomfortable for me to face or feel. Then I would have a slip. So it became a game for me. Was this event or circumstance enough to justify another slip? Sure, why not? That's the nature of the disease. Everything and anything was an excuse to eat. It wasn't until I made a commitment to abstinence that I was forced to find my solutions in the Twelve Steps and really let go of my addiction. I'm grateful to my Higher Power that I hit the bottom I did. By accepting the truth about myself and my food addiction, I am now free to live in the solution. One Day at a Time . . . I will renew my commitment by receiving the gift of abstinence and practicing my program to the best of my ability. Christine S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Physicians who are familiar with alcoholism agree there is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasn't done so yet. - Pg. 31 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Nothing comes easy for us right now. A lot of energy goes into just staying put and accepting this new way of life. We say that when the going gets tough, we hang tough! We know that it will pass, we make that promise to you. But it will be in God's time, not yours. Let me believe in myself, in this program, and in You, my Spiritual Source. Looking Toward What is Good I am a creative being. I have the power of reason, the ability to think, hope and dream. I can envision my life not only as it is, but as I might wish it to be. I can then think through the steps I might need to become more of who I am. I have the power to think my way into a happy point of view, to see the glass as half full rather than half empty. My mind can be my greatest enemy or my greatest ally. It depends on how I choose to use it. I hold a beautiful vision of life. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Grateful addicts don't drink and drug and drinking and drugging addicts aren't grateful. My gratitude is not the word but my desire to say the word. My desire to say the word is a corner stone of my recovery. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Is it odd or is it God? Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I dare to openly express my needs and find healthy ways to get them met. I like feeling good today. I like myself today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote My sponsor says 'Mark the places where you find God and go there often.' AA meetings are a place where I find God - I think that the power of God is in the group. - Chris C.
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March 20
Daily Reflections LOVE AND TOLERANCE Love and tolerance of others in our code. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84 I have found that I have to forgive others in all situations to maintain any real spiritual progress. The vital importance of forgiving may not be obvious to me at first sight, but my studies tell me that every great spiritual teacher has insisted strongly upon it. I must forgive injuries, not just in words, or as a matter of form, but in my heart. I do this not for the other persons' sake, but for my own sake. Resentment, anger, or a desire to see someone punished, are things that rot my soul. Such things fasten my troubles to me with chains. They tie me to other problems that have nothing to do with my original problem. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When we were drinking, we used to worry about the future. Worry is terrible mental punishment. What's going to become of me? Where will I end up? In the gutter or the sanitarium? We can see ourselves slipping, getting worse and worse, and we wonder what the finish will be. Sometimes we get so discouraged in thinking about the future that we toy with the idea of suicide. In A.A. have I stopped worrying about the future? Meditation For The Day Functioning on a material plane alone takes me away from God. I must also try to function on a spiritual plane. Functioning on a spiritual plane as well as on a material plane will make life what it should be. All material activities are valueless in themselves alone. But all activities, seemingly trivial or of seemingly great moment, are all alike if directed by God's guidance. I must try to obey God as I would expect a faithful, willing servant to carry out directions. Prayer For The Day I pray that the flow of God's spirit may come to me through many channels. I pray that I may function on a spiritual plane as well as on a material plane. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Whose Responsibility?, p. 79 "An A.A. group, as such, cannot take on all the personal problems of its members, let alone those of nonalcoholics in the world around us. The A.A. group is not, for example, a mediator of domestic relations, nor does it furnish personal financial aid to anyone. "Though a member may sometimes be helped in such matters by his friends in A.A., the primary responsibility for the solutions of all his problems of living and growing rests squarely upon the individual himself. Should an A.A. group attempt this sort of help, its effectiveness and energies would be hopelessly dissipated. "This is why sobriety--freedom from alcohol--through the teaching and practice of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, is the sole purpose of the group. If we don't stick to this cardinal principle, we shall almost certainly collapse. And if we collapse we cannot help anyone." Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Think, Think, Think Prudence. It's hard to believe, but some AA members insist that newcomers shouldn't think. "Whoever said you should think?" some members are told. The newcomer is apparently supposed to suspend all thinking for several months until reaching a certain level of recovery. This is nonsense, and it also contradicts AA teaching. If we don't want people to use their heads, why do we have printed cards on meeting room walls that say, "Think, Think, Think"? We are always capable of thinking, even in moments of deep despair. Indeed, we could not keep from thinking. A constructive approach to thinking is to form complete sentences from the slogan on the wall: THINK what might happen if I take one drink. THINK of the wonderful new life that awaits me in sobriety. THINK about ways of improving myself and following a more satisfactory lifestyle. It's also important to remember that good thinking will drive out bad thinking…. But good thinking has to be cultivated. I'll keep my thinking centered today on the good things that can be done in life. I'll focus my attention only on matters that are under my control, and I know that better thinking will bring better conditions. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years of trying to get other people interested in you. ---Dale Carnegie We wanted friends, but our addiction wanted all our attention. We had no time to be close to others. Well, stand aside, addiction! The program has taught us that others are important. Our purpose is to help others. People have become what’s important to us. Now we listen to others. We help them do what they want to do, not what we want them to do. We help people instead of use them. Friendship is now a way of life. And another promise of the program becomes a part of us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to know that I’m here to help others, not just myself. Through others, I find myself. Today’s’ Action: Today I’ll help someone the way he or she wants to be helped. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning There's a period of life where we swallow a knowledge of ourselves and it becomes either good or sour inside. --Pearl Bailey For too many of us, feelings of shame, even self-hatred, are paramount. No one of us has a fully untarnished past. Every man, every woman, even every child experiences regret over some action. We are not perfect. Perfection is not expected in the Divine plan. But we are expected to take our experiences and grow from them, to move beyond the shame of them, to celebrate what they have taught us. Each day offers us a fresh start at assimilating all that we have been. What has gone before enriches who we are now, and through the many experiences we've survived, we have been prepared to help others, to smooth the way for another woman, perhaps, who is searching for a new direction. We can let go of our shame and know instead that it sweetens the nuggets of the wisdom we can offer to others. We are alike. We are not without faults. Our trials help another to smoother sailing. I will relish the joy at hand. I can share my wisdom. All painful pasts brighten someone's future, when openly shared. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone. Every new alcoholic looks for this spirit among us and is immensely relieved when he finds we are not witchburners. A spirit of intolerance might repel alcoholics whose lives could have been saved, had it not been for such stupidity. We would not even do the cause of temperate drinking any good, for not one drinker in a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it. p. 103 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. I'd been home about a week or ten days when one of my friends asked if I could repair one of his electrical outlets. Thinking only of two or three dollars to buy some whiskey, I did the job and that's how I met Ella G., who was responsible for my coming into A.A. I went to this friend's shop to repair his electrical outlet, and I noticed this lady. She continued to watch me, although she didn't say anything. Finally she said, "Isn't your name Jim S?" I said, "Yes." Then she told me who she was. She was Ella G. When I had known her years before, she was rather slender, but at this time she weighed as much as she does now, which is up around in the two hundreds or very close to it. I had not recognized her, but as soon as she said who she was, I remembered her right away. She didn't say anything about A.A. or getting me a sponsor at that time, but she did ask about Vi, and I told her Vi was working and how she could locate her. It was around noon, a day or two later, when the telephone rang and it was Ella. She asked me if I would let someone come up and talk to me concerning a business deal. She never mentioned anything about my whiskey drinking because if she had I would have told her no right then. I asked her just what this deal was, but she wouldn't say. She said, "He has something of interest, if you will see him." I told her that I would. She asked me one other thing. She asked if I would try to be sober if I possibly could. So I put forth some effort that day to try to stay sober if I could, though my sobriety was just a daze. p. 242-243 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." In all these situations we need self-restraint, honest analysis of what is involved, a willingness to admit when the fault is ours, and an equal willingness to forgive when the fault is elsewhere. We need not be discouraged when we fall into the error of our old ways, for these disciplines are not easy. We shall look for progress, not for perfection. p. 91 ************************************************** ********* "There is only one small letter between the words CAN and CAN'T...and that one letter will TOTALLY change your destiny." -–Doug Firebaugh Happiness is intrinsic, it's an internal thing. When you build it into yourself, no external circumstances can take it away. That kind of happiness is a twenty-four-hour thing. --Leo F. Buscaglia God, if I can't see the joy in life, help me look again. --Melody Beattie Now and then I like to lift my eyes up from the details of daily life and remember the bigger picture, and take a breath of God, and feel and remember that ultimately, it's all okay. --Dan Millman God wants us to give from the heart when we see a need. --Nancy Shelton ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation APATHY "Science may have found a cure for most evils; but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all --- the apathy of human beings." -- Helen Keller I read today of a woman who ate herself to death. Friends and family when interviewed said, "She simply didn't seem to care." She had stuffed her feelings for so long that she had forgotten what they were; she had lost her spirituality. Apathy kills people. So long as people do nothing, the disease of addiction gets worse and more victims are claimed. Apathy feeds ignorance because it stops activity; apathy stops life. The antidote for apathy is spirituality. The spiritual person is alive with positive attitudes and creative hope --- he is infectious. People are challenged to discover a meaning to life in their own lives. Hope produces recovery; recovery produces a message that must be shared; in the message is the miracle of life. I pray that in the face of apathy I can discover hope. ************************************************** ********* "He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be greatly moved." Psalms 62:2 "For we walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corinthians 5:7 When you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets. Matthew 6:2 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration To run the life's race successfully we must run toward life, not away from it. Lord, bless me with the courage to meet my challenges as they happen and never allow fear to set up roadblocks. No one can live for himself alone for then he will have no purpose in life. To give of self is one of life's greatest joys and blesses us with a full and rich life. Lord, help me to be selfless and loving to those around me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Higher Power "Most of us have no trouble admitting that addiction had become a destructive force in our lives. Our best efforts resulted in ever greater destruction and despair. At some point, we realized that we needed the help of some Power greater than our addiction." Basic Text p. 24 Most of us know without a doubt that our lives have been filled with destruction. Learning that we have a disease called addiction helps us understand the source or cause of this destruction. We can recognize addiction as a power that has worked devastation in our lives. When we take the First Step, we admit that the destructive force of addiction is bigger than we are. We are powerless over it. At this point, our only hope is to find some Power greater than the force of our addiction—a Power bent on preserving life, not ending it. We don't have to understand it or even name it; we only have to believe that there could be such a Higher Power. The belief that a benevolent Power greater than our addiction just might exist gives us enough hope to stay clean, a day at a time. Just for today: I believe in the possibility of some Power that's bigger than my addiction. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I want, by understanding myself, to understand others. --Katherine Mansfield Growing up to be the best people we can be is a lifelong process. As teenagers, we may have thought that twenty-one would be a magic year for us because then we would become adults. We'd be grown up and able to handle any problems that came along, if any did. But the older we get, the more we realize that growing up is a process that never ends. We are always becoming the people we are capable of being. We're always learning new things about ourselves, and in that process, we're always coming to new understandings about other people and how we can get along with them. How wonderful that life always offers us room to grow! It makes new discoveries possible all through our lives, and ensures us that we will always have something to offer. What discovery have I made just today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. New life comes from shedding old skins and pressing through the darkness toward the light. Spring is the season of new beginnings and of growth. --Karen Kaiser Clark All of us in this program have had great turning points in our lives. In these new beginnings we have pressed onward or groped through the darkness, hoping to find the light, much like a new sprout arising from the cold soil in spring. Our recovery has pointed us toward the light. As spiritually alive men, we also have smaller beginnings all the time. Spring exists for us on the inside regardless of the time of year. On this particular day, we can think about the changes we see growing in our lives. It may be unclear to some of us just what is changing or how. We may not be able to name the change or describe it until it's in the past. Springtime brings a feeling of liberation, and our growth in this program frees us from muddled thinking, denial, addictions, and codependency. I am thankful for new beginnings in the world and the eternal spring within my being. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. There's a period of life where we swallow a knowledge of ourselves and it becomes either good or sour inside. --Pearl Bailey For too many of us, feelings of shame, even self-hatred, are paramount. No one of us has a fully untarnished past. Every man, every woman, even every child experiences regret over some action. We are not perfect. Perfection is not expected in the Divine plan. But we are expected to take our experiences and grow from them, to move beyond the shame of them, to celebrate what they have taught us. Each day offers us a fresh start at assimilating all that we have been. What has gone before enriches who we are now, and through the many experiences we've survived, we have been prepared to help others, to smooth the way for another woman, perhaps, who is searching for a new direction. We can let go of our shame and know instead that it sweetens the nuggets of the wisdom we can offer to others. We are alike. We are not without faults. Our trials help another to smoother sailing. I will relish the joy at hand. I can share my wisdom. All painful pasts brighten someone's future, when openly shared. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Releasing Let fears slip away. Release any negative, limiting, or self-defeating beliefs buried in your subconscious too. These beliefs may be about life, love, or yourself. Beliefs create reality. Let go. From as deep within as your fears, resentments, and negative beliefs are stored, let them all go. Let the belief or feeling surface. Accept it; surrender to it. Feel the discomfort or unrest. Then let it go. Let new beliefs replace the old. Let peace and joy and love replace fear. Give yourself and your body permission to let go of fears, resentments, and negative beliefs. Release that which is no longer useful. Trust that you are being healed and prepared for receiving what is good. Today, God, help me become willing to let go of old beliefs and feelings that may be hurting me. Gently take them from me and replace them with new beliefs and feelings. I do deserve the best life and love has to offer. Help me believe that. I am becoming more open to look within me today for my solutions. I trust that I will find the right answers if I go quietly within and follow my inner guide. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Learn to Heal Yourself Sometimes we trick ourselves. If we feel unhappy, troubled, or scared, we race toward what we think will make us feel better. In desperation, in fear, we grasp for something, anything to stop our pain. Finding that job. Making more money. Getting married. Having a relationship. If I get that one thing I need, then I’ll be happy. Then my pain will stop. Sometimes it’s true that finding the solution to a problem improves the quality of our lives. Having enough money enables us to fix the furnace when it breaks. Having people in our lives we love and who love us can be an important part of our happiness. Having work to do that we enjoy and that we feel is worthwhile helps us feel good about ourselves. But when we’re in pain– no matter what’s causing it– the way to heal that pain doesn’t come from outside of ourselves. External circumstances don’t make internal emotions disappear. Even if we get what we think we want, the painful emotion we haven’t had the strength or courage to face will still be there. The way to heal pain, the only way, is to feel and release it. Your pain is your pain. Your fear, desperation, and resentments are yours, too. All these emotions belong to you. Feel them, learn from them, and let them go. Walk courageously each step of the path on the journey to the heart. Emjoy when the universe sends you its gifts– a lover, some money, a good job. But know the ultimate key to happiness lies not in external things, but within you. Feel all your feelings. Learn to heal yourself. ****************************************** More Language of Letting Go Let go of what others think We had gone for a walk in the snow down into the bowl of Bryce Canyon in Utah earlier that day. After a quick shower in the hotel room, we headed down to the restaurant for dinner. Our boots were soaked from the snow, so we wore our flip-flops to the restaurant. The hostess was the first to notice. "Hey, you've got the wrong shoes on!" she admonished. "There's snow outside!" "Yeah, I know. We're from California," Chip replied. "Humph," the hostess sniffed, as she showed us our table. When our server approached our table, the hostess was right there again, quick to point out our inappropriate footwear to him. We tried to explain that we had been hiking and our boots were wet, but it only set her off more. "I certainly hope you didn't wear those," she said. "There's snow on the trails." Then she trotted back to her station. Our server didn't care. He listened to the story about our hike, told us one of his own, and kept our glasses full. Later during the meal, the hostess guided another couple past our table and pointed at our feet. "Look at these people," she said. "They're from California and they're wearing the wrong shoes!" We giggled all through dinner that night, all because our hiking boots got soaked. Sometimes what's appropriate for a situation just doesn't work for you and you're forced to improvise. Wear the wrong shoes if you must, but don't miss the party because of what someone else might think. God, help me remember that the important thing is how I live, not how I look. ****************************************** A Separate Reality Disconnecting from the Source by Madisyn Taylor We can all experience times when we feel disconnected from the universe, but you have never been abandoned. We all experience periods where we feel separated from the loving ebb and flow of the universe. These times of feeling disconnected from the source may occur for many reasons, but self-sabotage is the most common cause for us choosing to cut ourselves off from the flow of the universe. We purposefully, though often unconsciously, cut ourselves off from this flow and from the embrace of humanity so we can avoid dealing with painful issues, shun the necessary steps for growth, or prevent the success that we are afraid of achieving from ever happening. When you choose to disconnect from the source, you block the flow of the universe’s energy from passing through you. You become like a sleepwalker who is not fully awake to life, and your hopes, plans, and dreams begin to appear as distant blurs on a faraway horizon. Universal support has never left you, but if you can remember that you became disconnected from source by choice, you can choose to reconnect. Reconnecting with the universe grounds you and is as easy as you making a concerted effort to become interested in the activities you love or responding to what nurtures or stimulates you. You may also want to make a list of the activities and kinds of experiences that touch your soul. Try to pinpoint the times when you have felt fully engaged and aware and ask yourself what you were doing. But one of the easiest ways to reconnect is simply by stating the intention of doing so. When you disconnect from the universe, your sense of purpose, creativity, and ability to be innovative are not as easy to access. You may also experience a deep and empty sense of longing or feel devoid of ideas or unworthy of love. It’s important, however, to recognize that being disconnected from the universe is never a permanent state, and it can be reversed any time you decide that you are ready to reconnect. When you are connected to the universe, all aspects of your being will feel alive as the flow of the universe pours through your being and into your life. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The longer I’m in The Program, the more important becomes the slogan “First Things First” I used to believe that my family came first, that my home life came first, that my job came first. But I know today, in the depths of my heart, that If I can’t stay sober I’ll have nothing. “First Things First.” to me, means that everything in my life depends on my sobriety. Am I grateful fo be sober today? Today I Pray May my first priority, the topmost item on my list of concerns, be my sobriety — maintaining it, learning to live comfortably with it, sharing the tools by which I maintain it. When other things crowd into my life and I am caught up in the busyness of living, may I still preserve that first -of-all goal — remaining free of chemicals. Today I Will Remember First Things First. ****************************************** One More Day Understanding human needs is half the job of meeting them. – Adiai Stevenson We may have needed constant reminding to do our chores when we were children. We expected to be told what to do. Today we are adults and are chronically ill, and we find ourselves giving reminders to the people around us. Now, however, the suggestions have to be extremely delicate and carefully given. We can gently guide the behavior of spouse, friends, parents, and children regarding our medical problems. Our comments can be honest and direct: “It would help me if your would let me try to do things for myself before offering me your help.” Or “Please sweep the floor.” Or “Would you put the towels into the dryer?” Those around us are not able to read our minds. We can lear to say “I need” or “I want.” Our needs will be met if we ask directly. Learn to ask for help is hard, but I can learn. ************************************ Food For Thought Peeling Off Layers As we work our program, we peel off layers of old, worn out thoughts and habits. OA gives us a place to share old hurts and fears so that we are able to get rid of them. Our OA friends accept us and give us the benefit of their experience. With their help, we are able to leave the old layers behind and move ahead. We never stop learning and growing. When we are ready to accept it, our Higher Power reveals just as much truth to us as we can assimilate. He directs our progress through the Steps of this program as we are prepared to take them. If we are sincere in our efforts, the right help will come when we need it. It may come through another member, a piece of literature, a new insight, or even a difficult experience. Peeling off and discarding worn out layers of ourselves is hard work and is often painful. But when we look back and see how we have grown, the satisfaction more than outweighs the pain. Guide me as I peel away and leave behind the useless thoughts and habits I have accumulated. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Maintenance "Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance." Kurt Vonnegut Jr. With the help of our Higher Power, sponsors, and fellow Program members we have completed the 12 Steps, studied the Big Book, hit regular meetings, worked the loops, given service, etc .... and finally were able to achieve abstinence and reach our recovery goals! Reaching our goals is one thing, but now we must maintain what we've struggled so hard to achieve. As COE's, we never truly lose our addiction for food. Relape is only a heartbeat away. Therefore, we must diligently strive to continue working the Program tools to guard this precious gift that we have earned. One Day at a Time . . . I will diligently maintain the recovery goals I have worked so long and hard to achieve. Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We must be entirely honest with somebody if we expect to live long or happily in this world. - Pg. 73 - 74 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote It seems insane that we have to be brought to our knees before we seek help, but for most of us that's the way it is. Whatever crisis got us here, we will eventually see as a blessing in disguise. Thank You Higher Power, of my understanding, for the crisis--the one that brought me to my knees, because it also bought me this hour of clean and sober time. Seeing Clearly Today I will use my mind to actually visualize what I want my life to look like. I will give myself the gift of seeing my life through this beautiful lens. My thoughts have a creative power, they reach out, shape and template my experience. What I see as true for me, can be true for me, if I am willing sustain my vision and do the work I need to do to get there. Today I will picture doors opening for me where there were none before. I will take my thoughts seriously. I'll decide on what I'd like to see manifest in my life and I will carry it in my mind's eye and take daily steps toward actualizing it. I will see it as if it is already a reality. Then I'll let it go again and again and again and allow the wisdom of the universe to bring those experiences and opportunities toward me that allow me to take the next right action. I have faith in my own vision - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'To doubt everything or to believe everything are two equally convenient solutions; both dispense with the necessity of reflection.' -Jules Henri Poincsre I question myself, 'Am I a nay sayer to all suggestions?' or equally destructive 'Am I a disciple of a God Squad, blindly following a hard and inflexible line of thought?' "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Honesty without kindness is cruel and kindness without honesty is co-dependence. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am becoming more open to look within me today for my solutions. I trust that I will find the right answers if I go quietly within and follow my inner guide. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote It's ironic; when I looked like an alcoholic I wasn't one. Now I am an alcoholic I don't look like one. - Anon.
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March 21
Daily Reflections MATERIAL AND SPIRITUAL WELL-BEING Fear... of economic insecurity will leave us. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84 Having fear reduced or eliminated and having economic circumstances improve, are two different things. When I was new in A.A., I had those two ideas confused. I thought fear would leave me only when I started making money. However, another line from the Big Book jumped off the page one day when I was chewing on my financial difficulties: "For us, material well-being always followed spiritual progress; it never preceded."(p. 127). I suddenly understood that this promise was a guarantee. I saw that it put priorities in the correct order, that spiritual progress would diminish that terrible fear of being destitute, just as it diminished many other fears. Today I try to use the talents God gave me to benefit others. I've found that is what others valued all along. I try to remember that I no longer work for myself. I only get the use of the wealth God created, I never have "owned" it. My life's purpose is much clearer when I just work to help, not to possess. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day In A.A. we forget about the future. We know from experience that as time goes on, the future takes care of itself. Everything works out well, as long as we stay sober. All we need to think about is today. When we get up in the morning and see the sun shining in the window, we thank God that He has given us another day to enjoy because we're sober. A day in which we may have a chance to help somebody. Do I know that this day is all I have and that with God's help I can stay sober today? Meditation For The Day All is fundamentally well. That does not mean that all is well on the surface of things. But it does mean that God's in His heaven and that He has a purpose for the world, which will eventually work out when enough human beings are willing to follow His way. "Wearing the world as a loose garment" means not to be upset by the surface wrongness of things, but to feel deeply secure in the fundamental goodness and purpose in the universe. Prayer For The Day I pray that God may be with me in my journey through the world. I pray that I may know that God is planning that journey. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Debits and Credits, p. 80 Following a gossip binge, we can well ask ourselves these questions: "Why did we say what we did? Were we only trying to be helpful and informative? Or were we not trying to feel superior by confessing the other fellow's sins? Or, because of fear and dislike, were we not really aiming to damage him?" This would be an honest attempt to examine ourselves, rather than the other fellow. << << << >> >> >> Inventory-taking is not always done in red ink. It's a poor day indeed when we haven't done something right. As a matter of fact, the waking hours are usually well filled with things that are constructive. Good intentions, good thoughts, and good acts are there for us to see. Even when we tried hard and failed, we may chalk that up as one of the greatest credits of all. 1. Grapevine, August 1961 2. 12 & 12, p. 93 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Living One Day at a Time Time management It's surprising that some alcoholics learn how to "live one day at a time" while drinking. It had to work that way, or their drinking life would have been even more intolerable. It was convenient to shut off thoughts of tomorrow if one had enough money to drink today. It was also convenient to blot out thoughts of yesterday, which only meant remorse. In sobriety, living one day at a time is an excellent way to focus our minds so we can pour our energies into the work at hand. In reviewing the wasted yesterdays, we can always find ways that we could have been more productive and effective. But we missed opportunities because we were still struggling with regrets or fearing what might happen in the future. It's never too late to change all that. We need neither regret the past nor fear the future. The AA secret is to make the best of today's challenges. It may mean just chipping away at a massive problem that seems insurmountable. Living just for today, we can do today's job well. I'll live comfortably and happily in the here and now. This means releasing the past and accepting the future as something I'll deal with at the proper time. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple With each sunrise, we start anew. ----Anonymous Like a tree, our life depends on new growth. There are many ways to bring new ideas and growth into our lives. We can attend Twelve Step retreats. We can study books and tapes on spirituality. We can attend different Twelve Step meetings. But our spiritual newness may not just come from the Twelve Steps. We can do volunteer work or be active in other types of groups. We need to invite new ideas into our lives. We need to stay open to change. It doesn’t matter what renews our spiritual growth. What matters is that we keep our spiritual lives fresh and growing. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, spring is one of the four seasons. Help me feel like spring. Help me to be strong but not stuck Help me be firm yet open to spiritual growth. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll try to do something new. When I get stuck or stubborn, I’ll see that it’s due to my fear of trying new ideas. ************************************************** ********* Each Day A New Beginning Children are surely one of God's greatest gifts and truest challenges. To share your life with a child is to humble yourself so that you may learn from them and discover with them the beautiful secrets that are only uncovered in searching. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly Humility accompanies every experience wherein we let ourselves fully listen to others, to learn from them, to be changed by their words, their presence. Each opportunity we take to be fully present to another person, totally with them in mind and spirit, will bless us while it blesses them. Offering and receiving the gift of genuine attention is basic to the emotional growth of every human being. Before recovering, many of us so suffered from obsessive self-centered pity that we seldom noted the real needs or pain of the people close to us. We closed ourselves off, wallowing in our own selfish worries, and our growth was stunted. Some days we still wallow. But a new day has dawned. The Steps offer us new understanding. They are helping us look beyond ourselves to all the "children of God" in our daily lives. From each of them we have many secrets to learn. I will be joyous today. Many secrets about life are mine to learn if I will stay close to all the people who cross my path. I will be mindful they are there because they have something to give me. I will be ready to receive it. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it. After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to! p. 103 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. About seven that evening my sponsor walked in; Charlie G. He didn't seem too much at ease in the beginning. I guess I felt, and he sensed it, that I wanted him to hurry up and say what he had to say and get out. Anyhow, he started talking about himself. He started telling me how much trouble he had, and I said to myself, I wonder why this guy is telling me all his troubles. I have troubles of my own. Finally, he brought in the angle of whiskey. He continued to talk and I to listen. After he'd talked half an hour, I still wanted him to hurry up and get out so I could go and get some whiskey before the liquor store closed. But as he continued to talk, I realized that this was the first time i had met a person who had the same problems I did and who, I sincerely believe, understood me as an individual. I knew my wife didn't, because I had been sincere in all my problems to her as well as to my mother and to my close friends, but the urge to take that drink was more powerful than anything else. pp. 243-244 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Our first objective will be the development of self restraint. This carries a top priority rating. When we speak or act hastily or rashly, the ability to be fair-minded and tolerant evaporates on the spot. One unkind tirade or one willful snap judgment can ruin our relation with another person for a whole day, or maybe a whole year. Nothing pays off like restraint of tongue and pen. We must avoid quick-tempered criticism and furious, power-driven argument. The same goes for sulking or silent scorn. These are emotional booby traps baited with pride and vengefulness. Our first job is to sidestep the traps. When we are tempted by the bait, we should train ourselves to step back and think. For we can neither think nor act to good purpose until the habit of self-restraint has become automatic. p. 91 ************************************************** ********* Don't go through life, grow through life. --Eric Butterworth "You see what you choose to see, because all perception is a choice. And when you cease to impose your meanings on what you see, your spiritual eyes will open, and you will see a world free of judgment and shining in its endless beauty." --Paul Ferrini To gain that which is worth having, it may be necessary to lose everything else. --Bernadette Devlin God is the architect. I am the builder. "Stop talking about the problem and start thinking about the solution." -–Brian Tracy The highest reward for a man's toil is not what he gets for it but what he becomes by it. --John Ruskin ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation BROTHERHOOD "I love my country better than my family; but I love humanity better than my country." -- Francois Fenelon We need to think "big". We need to escape from those little concepts that keep us small. Life is more than we can ever perceive. We need to see it in its totality. The nuclear family can be restrictive if taken as the center of our loyalty. Even our national citizenship needs to be placed in the context of the world. Our freedom rests in our universal humanity. Spirituality is about thinking "big". It is finding God in the richness of His creation. Our insistence on our shared humanity is the path to world peace and serenity. Divisions should not exist for the humanitarian who seeks acceptance for all men simply because they are men. May I seek to find the One in the many --- and the many in the One. ************************************************** ********* "We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed." 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 "For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord will give grace and glory; no good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly." Psalms 84:11 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration God not only answers prayer, but He has all the answers to the prayers that we haven't bothered to ask. Lord, when you said "ask and you shall receive", may I keep in mind that no request is too small. It is far wiser to ask God for what He thinks is good for us, than for what we think is good for us. Lord, Your Will not mine be done. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today A Treatable Illness "Addiction is a disease that involves more than the use of drugs." Basic Text p. 3 At our first meeting, we may have been taken aback at the way members shared about how the disease of addiction had affected their lives. We thought to ourselves, "Disease? I've just got a drug problem! What in the world are they talking about?" After some time in the program, we began to see that our addiction ran deeper than our obsessive, compulsive drug use. We saw that we suffered from a chronic illness that affected many areas of our lives. We didn't know where we'd "caught" this disease, but in examining ourselves we realized that it had been present in us for many years. Just as the disease of addiction affects every area of our lives, so does the NA program. We attend our first meeting with all the symptoms present: the spiritual void, the emotional agony, the powerlessness, the unmanageability. Treating our illness involves much more than mere abstinence. We use the Twelve Steps, and though they don't "cure" our illness, they do begin to heal us. And as we recover, we experience the gift of life. Just for today: I will treat my illness with the Twelve Steps. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. --Mother Goose Poor Humpty ended up such a scrambled egg. Maybe that's what comes from sitting too long in one place, choosing neither this way nor that, playing both sides against the middle. Maybe he played too much politics, got too much advice, had too much to think about. When the centipede was asked which leg he first moved when setting out on a stroll, he got those legs all tangled in his mind and couldn't walk at all. It is better to be simply moved by those around us, or by our Higher Power, with faith and love. When our thoughts fail, their hearts, hands, and eyes will show the way. Do I sometimes decide my fate by refusing to decide? You are reading from the book Touchstones. If I Had My Life to Live Over ... I'd relax.... I would take fewer things seriously. I would take more chances. I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers.... I'd start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride more merry go rounds. I would pick more daisies. --Nadine Stair "Letting go" is a theme with many variations. When we live with gusto and are released to experience the full excitement of life, we are letting go. When we turn our lives and wills over to the care of our Higher Power, we are freed of many cares. If we orient our lives with a compass that always points to fear and insecurity, or to power and success, we are giving ourselves over to those forces. But we can orient our lives to our Higher Power's care and support. That makes it possible to drop our guard, allow for some mistakes, and delight in the pleasures of creation. Today, let me forget my worries and enjoy the fullness of life. You are reading from the book Each Day A New Beginning Children are surely one of God's greatest gifts and truest challenges. To share your life with a child is to humble yourself so that you may learn from them and discover with them the beautiful secrets that are only uncovered in searching. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly Humility accompanies every experience wherein we let ourselves fully listen to others, to learn from them, to be changed by their words, their presence. Each opportunity we take to be fully present to another person, totally with them in mind and spirit, will bless us while it blesses them. Offering and receiving the gift of genuine attention is basic to the emotional growth of every human being. Before recovering, many of us so suffered from obsessive self-centered pity that we seldom noted the real needs or pain of the people close to us. We closed ourselves off, wallowing in our own selfish worries, and our growth was stunted. Some days we still wallow. But a new day has dawned. The Steps offer us new understanding. They are helping us look beyond ourselves to all the "children of God" in our daily lives. From each of them we have many secrets to learn. I will be joyous today. Many secrets about life are mine to learn if I will stay close to all the people who cross my path. I will be mindful they are there because they have something to give me. I will be ready to receive it. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Considering Commitment Pay attention to your commitments. While many of us fear committing, its good to weigh the cost of any commitment we are considering. We need to feel consistently positive that its an appropriate commitment for us. Many of us have a history of jumping- -leaping headfirst- -into commitments without weighing the cost and the possible consequences of that particular commitment. When we get in, we find that we do not really want to commit, and feel trapped. Some of us may become afraid of losing out on a particular opportunity if we don't commit. It is true that we will lose out on certain opportunities if we are unwilling to commit. We still need to weigh the commitment. We still need to become clear about whether that commitment seems right for us. If it isn't, we need to be direct and honest with others and ourselves. Be patient. Do some soul searching. Wait for a clear answer. We need to make our commitments not in urgency or panic but in quiet confidence that what we are committing to is right for us. If something within says no, find the courage to trust that voice. This is not our last chance. It is not the only opportunity well ever have. Don't panic. We don't have to commit to what isn't right for us, even if we try to tell ourselves it should be right for us and we should commit. Often, we can trust our intuitive sense more than we can trust our intellect about commitments. In the excitement of making a commitment and beginning, we may overlook the realities of the middle. That is what we need to consider. We don't have to commit out of urgency, impulsivity, or fear. We are entitled to ask, Will this be good for me? We are entitled to ask if this commitment feels right. Today, God, guide me in making my commitments. Help me say yes to what is in my highest good, and no to what isn't. I will give serious consideration before I commit myself to any activity or person. Ii will take the time to consider if the commitment is really what I want. God is guiding me in peace and calm today. I know that everything that upsets this feeling is not permanent and will pass. I no longer allow upsets to keep me from seeing the good in others. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Nurture the Seasons of Your Soul Study nature’s ways. Learn her rhythms, her seasons, her cycles. See how she hibernates and rests during the cold winter, using that time to replenish and heal. See how she bursts forth in a slow crescendo of green and bright colors over the spring, rejoicing in the inevitable new growth. See how she gives her all, her grandest performance, over the summer months before gradually descending into a final burst of changing colors in autumn. Watch her cool down, return to her depths, and again take time to replenish. These same seasons are within us. There are times to take action, to be busily involved with creating and doing and participating and giving. There are quieter times when we are being prepared for those times of activity. We cannot give and give without taking time to replenish ourselves. There are times of gentle growth when the first blades of grass, the first signs of spring begin to emerge in our lives– whether those signal a new stage of personal growth, a new stage in a love relationship, or the first buds of life on a project we’re creating. And each season, each time, leads into the next. There is purpose and value in each day of your life, in each season of your life. Nurture your times of action, of creating, of doing, and value your quieter times of going within. The more you study nature, the more you will learn about yourself. Nurture and trust the seasons of your soul. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Letting go of finances Letting go doesn’t mean we don’t care. It’s about having faith that things will work out. Let’s take a look at how letting go applies to the issue of money. John had been an alcoholic for years. Over time, the disease destoyed his life, including his financial health. He hit bottom and finally began recovery. After a while, he was able to start making progress in life. But his finances were in terrible shape. For a while, he hid all the bills in a drawer. Then one day, he took out the bills and started to make a plan. Instead of feeling hopeless and overwhelmed, he applied the Twelve Steps to this area of his life. He called his creditors. He gave himself a budget. He did the best that he could and he let go of the rest. Slowly, over the years, he began to rebuild his credit. He paid off his debts, a little at a time. He applied for a credit card, the kind you have to pay in advance. Then after a year, his limit was raised. He doesn’t use the card for credit; he uses it for a credit rating. He’s now got a checking and savings account. He pays his taxes and manages to save a little every week. Sometimes things happen. Cars break down. People get sick. The rent gets raised. That unexpected expense comes up, out of the blue, just when you thought you were ahead. Worry never helped. An attitude of taking responsibility for myself did. What we cannot do for ourselves, God will do for us. And God knows we need money to live here on earth. What was that the Bible said? Seek money first, and then you’ll have peace? Nope, I got that backwards. “Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and all else shall be added unto you.” Manifest what you need from a place of responsibility, trust, and peace. God, teach me to let go of worrying about money. ****************************************** Remembering Who We Are Brave Spirits Most of us are familiar with the idea that we are not human beings having spiritual experiences; instead, we are spiritual beings having human experiences. We hear this and even though we may experience a resounding yes in our bodies, we may not take the time to really acknowledge the truth of these statements. Integrating this idea into how we view ourselves can broaden our sense of who we are and help us appreciate ourselves as brave spirits on an important mission to learn and grow here on earth. As spiritual beings, we are visitors in this physical realm. The fact that we came here and lost all memory of what happened to us before we were born is one of the many reasons that it takes so much courage for a soul to incarnate on earth. This is why spiritual inquiry so often feels like a remembering—because it is. Remembering that we are spiritual beings is part of the work that we are here on earth to do. When we operate from a place of remembering, we tap into the wisdom that our spirit accumulated even before we stepped into this lifetime. Remembering who we are can give us the patience to persevere when we become overwhelmed or frustrated. It can give us the courage to work through the most daunting challenges and help us trust the ancient wisdom we carry that is offered to us by our intuition. We have chosen to be on earth because there is something we want to learn that can only happen by inhabiting a body. Some of us are here to repay a debt, learn about love, or teach forgiveness. Most of us are here for a combination of reasons, we carry this information in our souls, all we have to do is remember. As you go through your journey, try not to forget how brave you are, being here now. Honor yourself. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program teaches us that we have an incurable illness. We alwys get worse, never better. But we’re fortunate in that our incurable illness can be arrested, so long as we don’t tkae the first drink one day at a time. Hightoned academic rsearch and ivory tower studies to th contrary, we know rom experiece that we can no more control our drinking than we can control the ocean tides. Do I have any doubt that I am owerless over alcohol? Today I Pray May I never fall prey to any short-term research sresults which tell me that alcoholism can be cured, that I would be safe to bbegin drinking again, suppoosedly, in a responsible manner. My experience — and the experience of those in The Program — will outshout such threories. May I know thaat my disease is arrestablke, but not curable. May I know that if I took up my active addiction again, I would begin whre I left off — closer than ever to possible death or insanity. Today I Will Remember Be wary of new theories. ****************************************** One More Day It is a happy talent to know how to play. – Ralph Waldo Emerson As the carefree days of childhood give way to adulthood, we sometimes forfeit too much of the child. We become what we think is mature — serious and busy. Quite unintentionally we might become caught up in the importance of being married, working hard at our jobs, raising children, or paying off the mortgage. Even at home we might be rushing here and there – mowing the lawn, getting a haircut, buying clothes or groceries, and performing all the small household chores which need doing regularly. Where is the time we need for ourselves, to spend with friends, or just to play? We can find time, right now, if we want to. We can momentarily shrug off the demands of home or career and lend ourselves to carefree play. It’s sometimes easy to be too serious. Today, I will let myself participate in play. ************************************ Food For Thought Letting Go By admitting that we are unable to manage our own lives, we become ready to let a Higher Power take over. Before we can fully benefit from God's direction, we must let go completely of the idea that we are in control. We say that we are grateful compulsive overeaters, because if it had not been for our inability to control what we ate and the resulting turmoil in our lives, we might never have realized our need to "let go and let God." When we turn our problems over to our Higher Power, we leave them with Him and move as He directs. If we take the problems back, we are like a child who has given his or her parent a broken toy to fix, but snatches it back before the parent can make the repair. If we had been able to fix our problems ourselves, our way, we would not be in this program. Since we know we need help, let's be willing to let go and try God's way. May I let go of my problems so that You may direct my life. ***************************************** One Day At A Time PATIENCE "Patience is the companion of wisdom." Saint Augustine Patience is an area that I have had some REAL problems with in the past. I had a tendency to want - what I want - NOW! That included recovery. Gaining recovery, as I would eventually realize, is not the same as earning a university credit. It is a process not an end result. You have to be willing to learn to do things in HP's time and manner rather than your own. What began to happen was - the more impatient I became - the more life tended to resist my efforts. It took a long time for me to realize this. Instead of calming down, I would get even more impatient and struggle even harder. Eventually, I would have a big meltdown and feel like a fool afterwards. The end result was absolutely no different for having done this. It took time for me to muster the willingness to do things in HP's time and manner. But when I did - life became much more peaceful and things had a tendency to work themselves out - without all the dramatics. One Day at a Time . . . I will learn to patiently and willingly do things in HP's time and manner. Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The terms 'spiritual experience' and 'spiritual awakening' are used many times in this book which, upon careful reading, shows that the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism has manifested itself among us in many different forms. - Pg. 567 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Take the name of the person who has caused you the most trouble today and say: ______________, I don't have to use you as an excuse to drink or take drugs right now, because I know chemical dependency is a disease, not a reaction to people, places, or things. Thank You for showing me that people are not good excuses for practicing a chronic and deadly disease. Living the Segments of My Day Intentionally I will divide my day into segments of intention. When I wake up in the morning I will picture feeling good as I go about my early routines. When I move into the next part of my day I will see my morning going smoothly, whatever I have to do I will picture doing with ease and a happy feeling. I will be intentional about each segment of my mid day, seeing myself operating effectively, competently and enjoying my interactions with those I encounter and interact. As afternoon approaches, I will imagine, in my mind's eye, a pleasant and peaceful evening. And as evening gives way to night, I will imagine myself enjoying a peaceful and restful sleep. I will be intentional about how I live each part of my day. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote If you think you can or you think you can't, you're probably right. The state of my world is a reflection of the state of my mind. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book To belittle is to be little. Time for Joy - Book - Quote God is guiding me in peace and calm today. I know that everything that upsets this feeling is not permanent and will pass. I no longer allow upsets to keep me from seeing the good in others. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote God stands for; Group Of Drunks. - John L.
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March 22
Daily Reflections NO MORE STRUGGLE And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone -- even alcohol. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84 When A.A. found me, I thought I was in for a struggle, and that A.A. might provide the strength I needed to beat alcohol. Victorious in that fight, who knows what other battles I could win. I would need to be strong, though. All my previous experience with life provided that. Today I do not have to struggle or exert my will. If I take those Twelve Steps and let my Higher Power do the real work, my alcohol problem disappears all by itself. My living problems also cease to be struggles. I just have to ask whether acceptance -- or change -- is required. It is not my will, but His, that needs doing. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We're all looking for the power to overcome drinking. A fellow comes into A.A. and his first question is: How do I get the strength to quit? At first, it seems to him that he will never get the necessary strength. He sees older members who have found the power he is looking for, but he doesn't know the process by which they got it. This necessary strength comes in many ways. Have I found all the strength I need? Meditation For The Day You cannot have a spiritual need which God cannot supply. Your fundamental need is a spiritual need, the need of power to lead the good life. The best spiritual supply is received by you when you want it to pass on to other people. You get it largely by giving it away. God gives you strength as you pass it on to another person. That strength means increased health; increased health means more good work, and more good work means more people helped. And so it goes on, a constant supply to meet all spiritual needs. Prayer For The Day I pray that my every spiritual need will be supplied by God. I pray that I may use the power I receive to help others. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It "Selfish"?, p.81 "I can see why you are disturbed to hear some A.A. speakers say, 'A.A. is a selfish program.' The word 'selfish' ordinarily implies that one is acquisitive, demanding, and thoughtless of the welfare of others. Of course, the A.A. way of life does not at all imply such undesirable traits. "What do these speakers mean? Well, any theologian will tell you that the salvation of his own soul is the highest vocation that a man can have. Without salvation--however we may define this--he will have little or nothing. For us of A.A., there is even more urgency. "If we cannot or will not achieve sobriety, then we become truly lost, right in the here and now. We are of no value to anyone, including ourselves, until we find salvation from alcohol. Therefore, our own recovery and spiritual growth have to come first--a right and necessary kind of self-concern." Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Let Go and Let God Guidance. Though it came from outside AA, the idea of "letting go and letting God" has taken root in the fellowship. The trouble comes when we try to decide what it really means. We obviously need to continue working and we still have to make important decisions. SO how d o we let God take charge? Surrendering to God's will is a shift that takes place in our attitude. We take whatever actions seem reasonable and proper according to our view of things. We remember, however, that a better plan may be unfolding in every situation. In many cases, it can even be a case of wanting too little rather than too much. One member, for example, sought guidance in a business decision. He was disappointed when the deal feel through, but discovered, only a few weeks later, an even better opportunity that worked out perfectly. "Letting God" is really a form of working Step Eleven.. Seeking "Knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." As we do that, our lives must become enriched and improved in every way. I'll approach the day with the idea that God is working it out for the highest good of everybody. Temporary setbacks won't bother me if I know that God's plan is unfolding in my life. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple If anything, we have tended to be people who wanted it all now. To hope is not Not to demand. --- On Hope Maybe we were a bit demanding. Maybe we were a bit impatient. Maybe that’s why we had such little hope. Hope is believing good will come even in bad time. Hope is knowing that “this, too, shall pass.” Hope is knowing that no matter how afraid we are, God will be with us. Hope is knowing we never have to be alone again. It is knowing that time that time is on our side. Hope is giving up control. Hope is knowing we never had control in the first place. Hope is believing in ourselves. Hope is what our program is all about. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, in our program we share our experiences, our strengths, and our hopes. Thank you for giving all three of these to me to share. Action for the Day: I will share my hope for the future with myself, my Higher Power, and my friends. I also will share this with someone who has lost hope. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Reared as we were in a youth and beauty oriented society, we measured ourselves by our ornamental value. --Janet Harris Rare is the woman who doesn't long for a svelte body, firm breasts, pretty teeth, a smooth complexion. Rare is the woman who feels content, truly satisfied with her total person. We are often torn between wanting to be noticed and yet not wanting eyes to gaze upon us. We are all that we need to be today, at this moment. And we have an inner beauty, each of us, that is our real blessing in the lives of others. Our inner beauty will shine forth if we invite it to do so. Whatever our outer appearance, it doesn't gently touch or bring relief where suffering is--like our words which come from the heart, the home of our inner beauty. Perhaps a better mirror for reflecting our true beauty is the presence or absence of friends in our lives. We each have known stunning women who seemed to cast only cold glances our way and handsome men who arrogantly belittled others. It's our inner beauty that is valued by others. The surprise in store for each of us is discovering that the glow of our inner beauty transforms our outer appearance too. My beauty today will be enhanced by my gentle attention to the other people sharing my experiences. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES * WITH FEW EXCEPTIONS, our book thus far has spoken of men. But what we have said applies quite as much to women. Our activities in behalf of women who drink are on the increase. There is every evidence that women regain their health as readily as men if they try our suggestions. * The fellowship of Al-Anon Family Groups was formed about thirteen years after this chapter was written. Though it is entirely separate from Alcoholics Anonymous, it uses the general principles of the A.A. program as a guide for husbands, wives, relatives, friends, and others close to alcoholics. The foregoing pages (though addressed only to wives) indicate the problems such people may face. Alateen, for teen-aged children of alcoholics, is a part of Al-Anon. If there is no Al-Anon listing in your local telephone book, you may obtain further information on Al-Anon Family Groups by writing to its World Service Office: Box 862, Midtown Station, New York, NY 10018-0862 p. 104 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. After Charlie had talked a while, I knew that this man had something. In that short period he built within me something that I had long since lost, which was hope. When he left, I walked with him to the streetcar line, which was just about a half a block, but there were two liquor stores, one on each corner from my home. I put Charlie on the car, and when I left him, I passed both of those liquor stores without even thinking about them. p. 244 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Disagreeable or unexpected problems are not the only ones that call for self-control. We must be quite as careful when we begin to achieve some measure of importance and material success. For no people have ever loved personal triumphs more than we have loved them; we drank of success as of a wine which could never fail to make us feel elated. When temporary good fortune came our way, we indulged ourselves in fantasies of still greater victories over people and circumstances. Thus blinded by prideful self confidence, we were apt to play the big shot. Of course, people turned away from us, bored or hurt. pp. 91-92 ************************************************** ********* God, please show me how to put ideas like fun and joy back into my life. Show me how to have more fun in work, in love, and in play. --Melody Beattie "There are lessons to be learned in every place. The mark of spiritual mastery is the ability to remember God wherever we go, and through whatever we experience." --Alan Cohen "A friend will see us at our worst, as well as our best. A friend will not close his or her heart when we have made a mistake. A friend will not condemn us but will compassionately support our return to a state of grace." --Marianne Williamson Someone's opinion of you does not have to become your reality. --Les Brown However I pray, God hears my prayers. --Katrina Cassel ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FORGIVENESS "God will forgive me; that's his business." -- Heinrich Heine It took me a long time to accept that God had forgiven the deeds done in my addiction. It took me a long time to comprehend that God is forgiveness, "forgiving love". Forgiveness unites us with God because it is His nature to forgive. When I am living the spiritual life, I can unite myself with Him by my acts of forgiveness. And when I forgive others, I am doing a kindness, an act of forgiveness, to myself. Hate used to drain me of energy and it still can if I get caught up in resentments. Forgiveness restores energy and peace. When I forgive, I am at one with God. In the forgiveness of others I discover me. ************************************************** ********* "But You, O GOD the Lord, Deal with me for Your name's sake; Because Your mercy is good, deliver me" Psalm 109:21 He that followeth after righteousness and mercy findeth life, righteousness, and honor. Proverbs 21:21 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Think often of your friends and seldom of your enemies and you will surround yourself with good thoughts, leaving little or no room for darkness. Lord, help me search for goodness so that it is goodness that I find. We take for granted so much of what God has planned for us. Lord, may I have sufficient preparation to meet the challenges of today and rejoice in the person that I am. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Principle Of Self-Support "In our addiction, we were dependent upon people, places, and things. We looked to them to support us and supply the things we found lacking in ourselves." Basic Text pg. 67 In the animal kingdom, there is a creature that thrives on others. It is called a leech. It attaches itself to people and takes what it needs. When one victim brushes the leech off, it simply goes to the next. In our active addiction, we behaved similarly. We drained our families, our friends, and our communities. Consciously or unconsciously, we sought to get something for nothing from virtually everyone we encountered. When we saw the basket passed at our first meeting we may have thought, "Self-Support! Now what kind of odd notion is this?" As we watched, we noticed something. These self-supporting addicts were free. By paying their own way, they had earned the privilege of making their own decisions. By applying the principle of self-support in our personal lives, we gain for ourselves the same kind of freedom. No longer does anyone have the right to tell us where to live, because we pay our own rent. We can eat, wear, or drive whatever we choose, because we provide it for ourselves. Unlike the leech, we don't have to depend on others for our sustenance. The more responsibility we assume, the more freedom we'll gain. Just for today: There are no limits to the freedom I can earn by supporting myself. I will accept personal responsibility and pay my own way today. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Real men don't vacuum. --Anna Genich Once, not so long ago, there was a family who tried to divide up housework equally. The father signed up for vacuuming, but he never got around to doing it. One morning he told everyone about his dream the night before. He was lined up in the dining room with an entire football team, and they all ran in a line through the house, pushing the clutter and dirt up against the walls and out of the way. They came to a finish at the picture window, where the father turned and raised his arms in victory. Then he saw his wife watching him, so he explained, "Heroes don't vacuum." Perhaps each of us is a hero at one time or another. In that case, we might take turns at different chores, rewarding the day's hero with a day off from vacuuming or dishwashing. When we work together to get the chores done, we become a family of heroes, and can feel a healthy pride in our warm, loving, and clean home. How can we share housework more equally? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Let no one be deluded that a knowledge of the path can substitute for putting one foot in front of the other. --M. C. Richards Recovering men know this path is not always easy. We usually talk about the benefits of recovery and the many promises of the program. Today, in our fellowship, we talk of the challenges we must face in order to recover. Honesty may be the greatest challenge. It is frightening to be honest with ourselves about things we have never really admitted or faced before. Sometimes we have new and confusing feelings and think something must be wrong with us. But we may be just experiencing the logical outcome of our earlier commitment to be honest. No one recovers by thinking about it. We must actively take each Step and meet the challenges presented. We are not alone with our difficulties. We are part of a large movement of men committed to recovery, and this quiet moment is one way in which we are simply putting one foot in front of the other. Today, I pray for the courage to remain faithful when the fears and pains of my transformation are overwhelming. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Reared as we were in a youth and beauty oriented society, we measured ourselves by our ornamental value. --Janet Harris Rare is the woman who doesn't long for a svelte body, firm breasts, pretty teeth, a smooth complexion. Rare is the woman who feels content, truly satisfied with her total person. We are often torn between wanting to be noticed and yet not wanting eyes to gaze upon us. We are all that we need to be today, at this moment. And we have an inner beauty, each of us, that is our real blessing in the lives of others. Our inner beauty will shine forth if we invite it to do so. Whatever our outer appearance, it doesn't gently touch or bring relief where suffering is--like our words which come from the heart, the home of our inner beauty. Perhaps a better mirror for reflecting our true beauty is the presence or absence of friends in our lives. We each have known stunning women who seemed to cast only cold glances our way and handsome men who arrogantly belittled others. It's our inner beauty that is valued by others. The surprise in store for each of us is discovering that the glow of our inner beauty transforms our outer appearance too. My beauty today will be enhanced by my gentle attention to the other people sharing my experiences. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Letting Go of Being a Victim Its okay to have a good day. Really. Its okay to be doing okay and to feel like our life is manageable and on track. Many of us have learned, as part of our survival behaviors, that the way to get the attention and approval we want is to be victims. If life is awful, too difficult, unmanageable, too hard, unfair, then others will accept, like, and approve of us, we think. We may have learned this from living and associating with people who also learned to survive by being a victim. We are not victims. We do not need to be victimized. We do not need to be helpless and out of control to get the attention and love we desire. In fact, the kind of love we are seeking cannot be obtained that way. We can get the love we really want and need by only owning our power. We learn that we can stand on our own two feet, even though it sometimes feels good to lean a little. We learn that the people we are leaning on are not holding us up. They are standing next to us. We all have bad days- -days when things are not going the way wed like, days when we have feelings of sadness and fear. But we can deal with our bad days and darker feelings in ways that reflect self-responsibility rather than victimization. Its okay to have a good day too. We might not have as much to talk about, but well have more to enjoy. God, help me let go of my need to be a victim. Help me let go of my belief that to be loved and get attention I need to be a victim. Surround me with people who love me when I own my power. Help me start having good days and enjoying them. As I start this day with quiet meditation, I feel myself becoming still and at peace. At any time during the day I can bring my mind back to this moment. I will bring my attention and awareness back to the peace that I have when I am with my breath and I know that my breath is with me at all times, whether I remember it or not. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Don’t Be Controlled by Love Using love to control and manipulate is heartbreaking. It can break the heart of the person doing it, it can break the heart of the person it’s being done to. So often, controlling through love is done almost unconsciously. It’s a dance people do out of habit to get their needs met. Their reasons don’t matter, although it’s easier to have compassion for those who control unknowingly than those who use the power of love maliciously and viciously. What matters is how you respond if it’s being done to you. What matters is that you don’t do it to other people. Open your heart and see the truth. Set yourself free. If someone is controlling you by using your love for them or your need to be loved, acknowledge it. If you are doing it to someone else, acknowledge that,too. Once you see the truth, you can set yourself free. So much of what we need to do to free our hearts and souls is simply to acknowledge the truth. The rest will happen naturally. Love has no price. It’s only love if it’s free. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Let go of the future Many years ago, in ancient times, Moses led a group of slaves out of Egypt and back to their homeland. Along the way, they had to wander for many years through the Sinai Peninsula, a barren, rocky, lifeless stretch of land. During their extended stay in the wilderness, God provided them with manna, a food that appeared out of nowhere and sustained the people with the nourishment they needed each day. The trick to this rhythm of trusting God, and receiving what they needed, was that any manna they received had to be used that day. Manna couldn’t be hoarded. It could not be stored or saved up for a rainy day. If the people hoarded their manna, it would spoil and rot away. Or it would mysteriously disappear as magically and certainly as it had appeared. Most of us know what it means to receive our daily bread. It’s the love, the guidance, the grace, and the material things we need each day on our journey. Sometimes, we can sit down and anticipate the times to come. We can look at our money, our strength, our abilities, our stamina, and say wearily, “There just won’t be enough.” That’s because we’re looking too far ahead. Look around at what you have available, this moment or this hour. Use the resources and gifts you’ve been given. Tomorrow’s manna will come at its appointed hour. ****************************************** Yellow Miracles Daffodils by Madisyn Taylor Almost nothing else represents the emergence of spring as the beloved yellow daffodil happy and bright after a long winter's nap. Some things on this earth look as if they were designed to bring happiness to the hearts of humans. The daffodil, with its bright yellow coloring and green stem, is one such creation. The daffodil makes its appearance in the spring, abundant and inexpensive, bringing gladness as sure as sunshine itself to whoever is lucky enough to receive a single stem, or a bunch, of these delicate yellow miracles. It is as if the sun has shed a layer of skin and fashioned a flower out of it. Color psychologists suggest that too much yellow can be too stimulating, but in small doses it inspires hope and good cheer. The daffodil is a perfect-sized package of yellow for anyone feeling glum or energetically low. It can spur us to action or simply imbue us with a feeling of optimism as it vibrantly glows in our homes or on our desks at work. The daffodil’s presence is ideal in any region where sunshine is scarce as it seems to carry the sun in the soft flesh of its petals. The bulbs are not expensive, and the flowers give so much that you may decide to plant a few in your yard or in a window box. Then again, you may simply wait until they arrive in neat little bundles in the grocery store or flower shop. They are usually very reasonably priced, so you can afford to spoil yourself, and those you love, with a large bouquet. A daffodil placed under the windshield wiper of a loved one’s car says, “Be happy! Spring has sprung! I love you!” A collection of stems gathered and placed in a Mason jar can be left on someone’s doorstep to remind them of the simple beauties that abound in this life. Don’t forget to bless yourself with a vase of these bright blossoms on your kitchen table or nightstand. Every time you see them, you will be filled with the happiness and warmth of the sun. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Once in a great while, I find myself thinking that perhaps things weren’t quite so bad as they seemed to be. At such moments, I force myself to realize that my illness is talking to me, trying to tempt me in to denying that I am. In fact, afflicted with an illness. One of the key action steps of The Program is that we give our illness to God as we understand Him, accepting our powerlessness in the face of His greater Power. Do I believe that the grace of God can do fo rme what I could never do for myself? Today I Pray May I know that much of our lives depends on faith. For we cannot know the limits of space and time — or explain the mysteries of life and death. But when we see God working through us – and through others who have found new life in The Program — it is all the evidence we need to know that He exists. Today I Will Remember The Big Wheel runs by faith. ****************************************** One More Day Courage is the resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear. – Mark Twain So many of us suffer from flagging self-esteem. This may occur for many reasons, all complex. When we finally decide we are going to create change in our lives, we may be uncertain as to how to make the change. How do we start? One of the best starting places is to adopt on premise of the Twelve Step Programs and begin to act “as if” we have all the confidence in the world, “as if” we have great faith in ourselves. We start to spend time thinking about the possibilities, rather than the impossibilities. We all fear the unknown, but to act “as if” helps us deal with the things we can’t see. Eventually, contrived as it feels, our new behavior will become new habits, and we won’t need to act “as if” – because we truly “are.” I am willing to try to act “as if” I can create change. ************************************ Food For Thought Abstinence Is a Way of Life Each morning when we wake up, we give thanks for another day of abstinence. Our bodies feel good, function well, and look better. To go back to our old ways of eating compulsively would be to give up the new health and peace of mind, which we have acquired through OA. We do not want to go back. We are learning a new way of life, one that is infinitely preferable to our old ways. In order to maintain our abstinence and continue to make progress, we need a program. For most of us, this involves working the Twelve Steps each day. Program sponsors can help us with this new way of life. Other OA members share their experience and tell us what has worked for them. Most of us find that we need the spiritual part of the program if we are to maintain our abstinence. Abstaining purely for weight control is usually not enough. If we are to keep what OA has given us, we have to share it with others. We find that the more we give it away, the more progress we make with our own program. To abstain is no sacrifice; it is growth and life. I am grateful for this new life. ***************************************** One Day At A Time PUSHING BUTTONS & PATIENCE "Adopt the pace of nature; her secret is Patience." Ralph Waldo Emerson When I first came to Program, I didn't really know what abstinence was. I thought it was a diet. It turned out to be far more than I ever imagined. Since beginning, I've gained abstinence, I've lost weight and my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being has changed more than I ever thought possible. I've come so far ... beyond my wildest dreams ... yet, sometimes it feels like it's still not enough. I'll get in a row with my 12 year old daughter over some minor issue. She has a way of pushing my buttons which sends me into "fingerpointing" and "lecture" mode - good intentions gone totally awry! She'll ultimately tune me out - and I'll walk away feeling like a bad parent. The guilt will set in and I'll deride myself for lacking patience and having bad judgement! But once I've calmed down - I'll remind myself that my intentions were good and - as in my food plan - progress not perfection has to apply to my parenting just as it does to my any other aspect of my recovery. This requires me to be patient with MYSELF as well as with others. One Day at a Time . . . I will learn to be patient with myself as well as with others. Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day 'Thy will be done.' We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves. - Pg 87-88 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Reliance for our recovery must be placed upon spiritual faculties and not objective things. People, places, and things are transitory, flitting through our lives at different speeds. We can trust no person, no place, and often not even our own best intentions. We can only trust our spiritual foundation. I know that staying clean and sober is a gift based on the spiritual foundation I lay hour to hour, one day at a time. Actualizing the Gifts that are In Me I will actualize that gifts that are in me today. I will be less preoccupied with who I'm not and more occupied with who I am. When I spend all of my time looking outside of me or wanting what others have, I forget that I have my own special gifts. God has placed gifts within me that I am meant to develop and share. My responsibility is to come to know what my gifts are, then to cultivate and strengthen them as I share them with the world. I look for the gifts that are in me. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'It is time to speak your Truth. Create your community. Be good to each other. And do not look outside yourself for the leader. This could be a good time!' Oraibi, Arizona Hopi Nation I enjoy the Fellowship of the Spirit. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you are clean and sober, the miracle has already happened. Stick around, the impossibilities take a little longer. Time for Joy - Book - Quote No matter how busy I am today, I will begin and end my day with quiet time. I look forward to that time when I stop all outward activity, rest and look within for my peace and truth. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I'm definitely an alcoholic. My friend asked; 'If they discovered a pill that if you took one you could drink safely, what would you do?' I said; 'I'd want to know what happens if you take two.' - Larry S.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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March 23
Daily Reflections . . . AND NO MORE RESERVATIONS We have seen the truth again and again: "Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.". . . If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol. . . . To be gravely affected, one does not necessarily have to drink a long time nor take the quantities some of us have. This is particularly true of women. Potential female alcoholics often turn into the real thing and are gone beyond recall in a few years. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 33 These words are underlined in my book. They are true for men and women alcoholics. On many occasions I've turned to this page and reflected on this passage. I need never fool myself by recalling my sometimes differing drinking patterns, or by believing I am "cured." I like to think that, if sobriety is God's gift to me, then my sober life is my gift to God. I hope that God is as happy with His gift as I am with mine. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Strength comes from the fellowship you find when you come into A.A. Just being with men and women who have found the way out gives you a feeling of security. You listen to the speakers, you talk with other members, and you absorb the atmosphere of confidence and hope that you find in the place. Am I receiving strength from the fellowship with other A.A. members? Meditation For The Day God is with you, to bless and help you. His spirit is all around you. Waver not in your faith or in your prayers. All power is the Lord's. Say that to yourself often and steadily. Say it until your heart sings with joy for the safety and personal power that it means to you. Say it until the very force of the utterance drives back and puts to naught all the evils against you. Use it as a battle cry. All power is the Lord's. Then you will pass on to victory over all your sins and temptations and you will begin to live a victorious life. Prayer For The Day I pray that with strength from God I may lead an abundant life. I pray that I may lead a life of victory. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Trouble Becomes an Asset, p. 82 "I think that this particular General Service Conference holds promise and has been filled with progress--because it has had trouble. And it has converted that trouble into an asset, into some growth, and into a great promise. "A.A. was born out of trouble, one of the most serious kinds of trouble that can befall an individual, the trouble attendant upon this dark and fatal malady of alcoholism. Every single one of us approached A.A. in trouble, in impossible trouble, in hopeless trouble. And that is why we came. "If this Conference was ruffled, if individuals were deeply disturbed--I say, 'This is fine." What parliament, what republic, what democracy has not been disturbed? Friction of opposing viewpoints is the very modus operandi on which they proceed. Then what should we be afraid of?" Talk, 1958 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Act As If Finding Direction Though it sounds like a game or a trick, there's great power in "acting as if." This means acting as if we've already succeeded, acting as if we expect everybody to cooperate with us, acting as if we've already reached whatever goal we're seeking. The principle behind this approach is that such acting helps focus our minds and energies on goals. It's also important to believe that our success is inevitable if we are truly on the right path. We should not employ this principle superstitously or assume it's a substitute for intelligent work and good judgment. It will be a substantial aid, however, in helping us eliminate the self-doubt and pessimism that dog so many alcoholics during their quest for sobriety. Too often, low self-esteem and a faulty belief that nothing will turn out right have led us to sabotage our own efforts. We should go into any venture with the idea that we've already succeeded.... that much good is going to come out of it, even if the exact outcome is somewhat different from what we had in mind. "Acting as if" is just what we might need to summon our powers for the duties ahead. An old saying affirms that "if God be for me, who can be against me?" I'll carry on today with the confidence that my Higher Power is guidnig all my efforts in the right direction. ************************************************* Keep It Simple If anything, we have tended to be people who have wanted it all now. To hope is not to demand. ---On hope Maybe we were a bit demanding. Maybe we were a bit impatient. Maybe that’s why we such little hope. Hope is believing good will, even in bad times. Hope is knowing that “this too, shall pass.” Hope is knowing that no mater how afraid we are, God will be with us. Hope is knowing we never have to be alone again. It is knowing that time is o our side. Hope is giving up control. Hope is knowing we never had control in the first place. Hope is believing in ourselves. Hope is what our program is all about. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, in our program we share our experiences, our strengths, and our hopes. Thank you for giving all three of these to me to share. Action for the Day: I will share my hope for the future with myself, my Higher Power, and my friends. I also will share this with someone who has lost hope. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning On occasion I realize it's easier to say the serenity prayer and take that leap of faith than it is to continue doing what I'm doing. --S.H. The pain of change is a reality. But so is the pain of no change--when change is called for. In spite of our desires, changing others will never be an option, whereas changing ourselves takes only a decision and is a choice always available. We can take an inventory for a moment. What are we presently doing that makes us ashamed or angry or fearful? We can let go of that behavior and responsibly choose a new tack. If strength is needed, or confidence to try a new behavior, we can simply ask that it be ours. The Third Step promises that our lives are in God's care and our needs are always being attended to--not always our wants, but in every instance our needs. Most of our struggles, today as in the past, are attached to persons and situations we are trying to forcibly control. How righteous our attitudes generally are! And so imposing is our behavior that we are met with resistance, painful resistance. Our recourse is now and always to "accept those things we cannot change, and willingly change that which we can." Our personal struggles will end when we are fully committed to the Serenity Prayer. The wisdom "to know the difference" is mine today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES But for every man who drinks others are involved—the wife who trembles in fear of the next debauch; the mother and father who see their son wasting away. p. 104 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. The following Sunday we met at Ella G.'s. It was Charlie and three or four others. That was the first meeting of a colored group in A.A., so far as I know. We held some two or three meetings at Ella's home, and from there we held some two or three meetings at her mother's home. Then Charlie or someone in the group suggested that we try to get a place in a church or hall to hold meetings. I approached several ministers and all of them thought it was a very good idea, but they never relinquished any space. So, finally, I went to the YMCA, and they graciously permitted us to use a room at two dollars a night. At that time we had our meetings on Friday nights. Of course, it wasn't very much of a meeting in the beginning, most of the time it was just Vi and myself. But, finally, we got one or two to come in and stick, and from there, of course, we started to grow. p. 244 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Now that we're in A.A. and sober, and winning back the esteem of our friends and business associates, we find that we still need to exercise special vigilance. As an insurance against "big-shot-ism" we can often check ourselves by remembering that we are today sober only by the grace of God and that any success we may be having is far more His success than ours. p. 92 ************************************************** ********* Don't point a finger - lend a hand. --Cited in Even More of...The Best of BITS & PIECES Inventory taking is not all in red ink. A recovering alcoholic without a sponsor is like a ship without a rudder. "Every great move forward in your life begins with a leap of faith, a step into the unknown." --Brian Tracy "The healthy and strong individual is the one who asks for help when he needs it." --Rona Barrett ". . . just to be alive is a grand thing." --Agatha Christie We cannot sink so low that God cannot lift us to freedom. --John Harrold ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SELF-LOVE "No matter how old you get, if you keep the desire to be creative, you're keeping the man-child alive." -- John Cassavetes When I was a child, I used to play in the sand and make castles. I would build a strong and firm fortress around the castle so that it could withstand the force of the sea. Today I also like to play in my life and I need to build strong and firm behavioral structures that will withstand pressure and stress. Today I need to build my life on a sure foundation --- and that foundation must be me! I need to take care of me so that I can enjoy my life. How do I take care of me? I watch what I drink. I am a recovering alcoholic, and so I choose not to drink alcohol. I drink soda, orange juice and milk --- but no alcohol. This is an important part of my self-love program. I exercise regularly. I watch what I eat and I avoid sugar and needless carbohydrates. I rest in the evenings and take walks in the fresh air. The child that is in me still lives, but today he is healthy. Help me to treat life responsibly, but not too seriously. ************************************************** ********* "We give thanks to You, O God, we give thanks! For Your wondrous works declare that Your name is near." Psalms 75:1 "In You, O Lord, I put my trust; let me never be put to shame." Psalms 71:1 Faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ. Romans 10:17 Yes, you are very special in the eyes of God. But you are what you are by the grace of God. 1 Corinthians 15:10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration How foolish it is to focus on our weaknesses and troubles, thereby giving them more power than they deserve. Lord, I ask for your wisdom and guidance in what I put into my mind. You are good and beautiful and intelligent and loved. Lord, may I accept me for all that I am and focus on my goodness. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today God's Gift "We do the footwork and accept what's being given to us freely on a daily basis." Basic Text pg. 46 Our relationship with our Higher Power is a two-way street. In prayer, we speak and God listens. When we meditate, we do our best to listen for the will of our Higher Power. We know that we are responsible for our part of the relationship. If we do not pray and listen, we shut our Higher Power out of our lives. When we think about our relationship with our Higher Power, it's important to remember which one we are: the powerless one. We can ask for guidance; we can ask for willingness or strength; we can ask for knowledge of our Higher Power's will-but we cannot make demands. The God of our understanding-the one with the power-will fulfill the half of the relationship by giving us exactly what we need, when we need it. We need to take action every day to keep our relationship with a Higher Power alive, One way we do this is by applying the Eleventh Step. Then we remember our own powerlessness and accept the will of a Power greater than ourselves. Just for today: In my relationship with my Higher Power, I am the powerless one. Remembering who I am, today I will humbly accept the gifts of the God I understand. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. It feels so good to cry. . . . --Susan Cygnet Some of us were taught that it's bad to express our feelings directly--crying, wailing, jumping up and down for joy--that it's good manners to talk softly, slowly, and politely and to sit still. But what happens to our feelings when we sit still? If they don't get expressed, they must be caught inside our bodies. Trapped feelings are like birds in a cage, or a rabbit in a trap--they try to get out any way they can. They peck on our heads and give us headaches. They scratch at our stomachs and make us hurt. We must let them out. We must laugh and cry. Then our bodies will be happy, and our feelings will curl up in our laps like happy puppies. Am I ignoring the physical symptoms of trapped feelings? You are reading from the book Touchstones. If anything is sacred, the human body is sacred. --Walt Whitman A renewed relationship with our bodies is part of our spiritual renewal. Perhaps we have not known our bodies as part of our spiritual selves. We may have treated ourselves and others as objects. Too often genitals were "tools" to be used, objects of our egos, or a way of taking care of someone else. Maybe we have used sex compulsively as an escape from other emotions. Men in recovery commonly encounter problems with sexuality. Those problems often come from knowing deep within that we must change, but not knowing how. It helps to create new images in our minds. We can imagine a totally relaxed playfulness with our partners, with no goal in mind and no judgment. We can imagine our Higher Power being with us. We can imagine talking in detail with someone - our partner or a friend - about our feelings, anxieties, or frustrations with sex. We can imagine ourselves as a whole body, alone, not with a partner, and okay Bringing sexuality into the whole of our lives is a spiritual thing to do. May I find ways to include sexuality in my spiritual awakening. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. On occasion I realize it's easier to say the serenity prayer and take that leap of faith than it is to continue doing what I'm doing. --S.H. The pain of change is a reality. But so is the pain of no change--when change is called for. In spite of our desires, changing others will never be an option, whereas changing ourselves takes only a decision and is a choice always available. We can take an inventory for a moment. What are we presently doing that makes us ashamed or angry or fearful? We can let go of that behavior and responsibly choose a new tack. If strength is needed, or confidence to try a new behavior, we can simply ask that it be ours. The Third Step promises that our lives are in God's care and our needs are always being attended to--not always our wants, but in every instance our needs. Most of our struggles, today as in the past, are attached to persons and situations we are trying to forcibly control. How righteous our attitudes generally are! And so imposing is our behavior that we are met with resistance, painful resistance. Our recourse is now and always to "accept those things we cannot change, and willingly change that which we can." Our personal struggles will end when we are fully committed to the Serenity Prayer. The wisdom "to know the difference" is mine today. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Flack from Setting Boundaries We need to know how far well go, and how far well allow others to go with us. Once we understand this, we can go anywhere. --Beyond Codependency When we own our power to take care of ourselves- -set a boundary, say no, and change an old pattern - we may get flack from some people. That's okay. We don't have to let their reactions control us, stop us, or influence our decision to take care of ourselves. We don't have to control their reactions to our process of self-care. That is not our responsibility. We don't have to expect them not to react either. People will react when we do things differently or take assertive action to nurture ourselves, particularly if our decision in some way affects them. Let them have their feelings. Let them have their reactions. But continue on your course anyway. If people are used to us behaving in a certain way, they'll attempt to convince us to stay that way to avoid changing the system. If people are used to us saying yes all the time, they may start mumbling and murmuring when we say no. If people are used to us taking care of their responsibilities, feelings, and problems, they may give us some flack when we stop. That's normal. We can learn to live with a little flack in the name of healthy self-care. Not abuse, mind you, Flack. If people are used to controlling us through guilt, bullying, and badgering, they may intensify their efforts when we change and refuse to be controlled. That's okay. That's flack too. We don't have to let flack pull us back into old ways if we've decided we want and need to change. We don't have to react to flack or give it much attention. It doesn't deserve it. It will die down. Today, I will disregard any flack I receive for changing my behaviors or making other efforts to be myself. Today, I no longer struggle to find my answers alone. I welcome and am open to positive and healthy support wherever I find it. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Comfort Yourself I was driving through Montana, on my way to a town on the Flathead Indian Reservation. I was going there because an old hotel, opened in 1928, noted for its medicinal mineral waters had caught my attention. As I pulled off the highway and began the drive down the side roads, I felt an environmental ambiance I hadn’t experienced before. The hills were huge mounds, covered with a soft-green, grassy moss. Not steep sharp mountains; comforting, rounded hills– one after another. A gentle energy emanated from them. It was more than love. More than kindness. I felt comforted, embraced, almost held by Mother Earth in her bosom. My body relaxed. My spirit soared. I felt warm. Cared for. Nurtured. Comforted. Comfort is a place we can visit often, as often as we need to. Although certain places and objects help comfort us, it is really a place within each of us. Some of us may have thought that comfort was a waste of time, but now we know that there is tremendous power in comfort, the power to heal. We no longer have to deprive ourselves of comfort, of that warm feeling of being nurtured. We can visit it for ourselves; we can take others there with us. What brings you comfort? What makes you feel safe, cozy, warm, loved? What places? What people? What events? Learn to comfort yourself. Learn to accept comfort, and learn to give it. Go to that special place of comfort whenever you need to. Stay as long as you wish. The healing power of comfort will make life better. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Let go of the trappings We call it keeping up with the Joneses. They buy a boat and we buy a bigger one. They get a new TV and we get a big screen. They start a business and we start planning our articles of incorporation and the first stock release. And while we’re so busy keeping up, we ignore our soul, the inner voice, that’s telling us that it really wants to teach children to read. While it helps to identify with each other, we’re not the same. So why compare ourselves on the basis of material things? Follow your own talent and heart. It may be that you are a talented public speaker, able to sway hundreds of people with your words. Or maybe you have the talent of friendship, and you’ve been sent to quietly, one-on-one, help those close to you walk their own path. If you must compare yourself to something, compare your daily life to your ideals and dreams. Do they match? If those ideals and dreams bring great material wealth, that’s great. If they mean a life of quiet, anonymous service, that’s great,too. Yes, material goods can be fun. But they can also be a trap. Are you walking a path with heart in your own life, regardless of what others have? God, help me let go of the trappings. Teach me to walk my own path. ****************************************** Divergent Directions Coping with People You Dislike by Madisyn Taylor When we are forced to deal with people we dislike, a great learning opportunity is being put forth to us. As much as most of us wish we could exist in harmony with the people we encounter throughout our lives, there will always be individuals we dislike. Some simply rub us the wrong way while others strike us as deliberately unaware. We may judge others as too mean or abrasive for us to interact with them comfortably. Yet no person should be deemed a villain because their beliefs, opinions, mannerisms, and mode of being are not compatible with your own. You need not embrace the rough traits they have chosen to embody. There may be times in which the best course of action involves distancing yourself from someone you dislike. But circumstances may require that you spend time in the company of individuals who awaken your aversion. In such cases, you can ease your discomfort by showing your foe loving compassion while examining your feelings carefully. The reasons we dislike some individuals are often complex and, at first, indecipherable. Often, we are automatically averse to people who are different because they compel us to question our values, spirituality, culture, and ideologies, threatening to undermine our self-assurance. Realistically, however, those you dislike have no power to weaken your life’s foundations. In fact, your aversion to specific individuals may actually be your response to your fear that specific qualities you see in them also exist within you. Their presence may force you to face internal issues you would rather not confront. If you meet someone who inspired an intense, largely negative response in you, ask yourself why your reaction is so laden with powerful emotions. Remember that you control your feelings and, if necessary, you can minimize this individual’s impact on your well-being by choosing how you will respond to them. Though you may not have an immediate breakthrough, your willingness to consider your dislike rationally can help you better understand the root of your feelings. Your aversion to certain individuals may not wane over time, yet the comprehension you gain through reflection can help you interact with them sympathetically, benevolently, and with a greater degree of kindness. There is nothing wrong with recognizing that you are incompatible with some people. You may never achieve a shared harmony with those you dislike, but you can nonetheless learn to modulate your reactions to these individuals and, ultimately, to coexist peacefully with them. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program teaches us, through the experience, strength and hope of its fellowship, that the worst situation imaginable does not warrant a return to our addiction. No matter how bad a particular situation or set of circumstances, the return to our old ways for even a minute will assuredly make it worse. Am I Grateful for the sharing and caring of “The Program” Today I Pray May I insist that no stone can be heavy enough to rag me back down into the pool of my addiction. No burden, so disappointment, no blow to pride or loss of human love is worth the price of returning to my old way of life. When I harbor thoughts that life is “too much” for me, that no one should be expected to “take so much and still remains sane” or that I am “the fall guy,”{ let me listen for the tone of my complaints and remember that I have heard that whine before — before I concluded that I was powerless over the chemical and gave my will over to the will of God. Such wailing sets me up for getting high again. May God keep my ears alert to the tone of my own complaining. Today I Will Remember Hear my own complaints. ****************************************** One More Day There the weary cease from troubling, and there the weary be at rest. – Job 3:17 We never thought we would have to learn to live with constant weariness. Our notions of illness may have prepared us for pain, inconvenience, maybe even some negative emotions like anger, but we had no way of anticipating the unrelenting drain of illness. There is tremendous comfort just in knowing we are not alone, that ultimately there is a Power greater than ourselves to whom we can turn for comfort and strength. We can’t always escape the physical weariness of illness, but we can regenerate our spirituality, which may have dissipated along with our good health. I cannot control my illness, but I can have a hopeful attitude. ************************************ Food For Thought Awareness To be aware is to be focused and alive. If we are truly alert to what is going on within and around us, we will never be bored. Through working the OA program, we develop greater awareness of ourselves, other people, and our Higher Power. Sometimes this new awareness brings pain; we realize that we have been hurt and that we have hurt others. Through our daily inventories, we recognize shortcomings and mistakes, which we may have ignored in the past. Often it is too late to undo all of the damage, which has been done by our compulsive overeating and general self-centeredness. Here is where we pray for acceptance of what we cannot change and courage to make amends where we can. It is then important to put what is past behind us and concentrate on being more aware now, today, so that we do not make the same mistakes again. When we are not dulled by too much food and the wrong kinds of food, we are more perceptive and aware in every aspect of our lives. Our experiences are richer and we are better able to grow and change. I pray for increasing awareness. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Progress, Not Perfection "The maxim 'Nothing but perfection' may be spelled "Paralysis." Winston Churchill I can't count the number of times I've heard the expression, "progress not perfection" from my sponsor and used it with my sponsees. We take little steps - one day at a time - which gradually lead to greater steps. Small successes eventually will lead to bigger successes. Often though, we want it all and we want it NOW! Recovery is a process - not an end result. It requires a kind of a balancing act - if we try to juggle more balls than what we're capable of comfortably balancing - we will crash and this can lead to relapse. So rather than juggling five balls and crashing - it's better to juggle three really well and gradually work in a 4th or a fifth. One Day at a Time . . . I will focus on making progress rather than trying to be perfect. Rob ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We have three little mottoes which are apropos. Here they are: First Things First Live and Let Live Easy Does It Pg. 135 - The Family Afterward Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Go look at yourself in the mirror. What do you see? Look into your eyes. Say: I have the disease of addiction. It's not horrible; it's not bad; it simply is. Right now, this hour, I accept this fact. Please lift any residual suspicion in me that whispers that I am bad for suffering from addiction. Opening to Abundance I am ready, willing and able to open my mind and heart to the abundance that the world has to offer me. This world brings forth what I need. The sun shines, water from fresh springs makes its way across rocky slopes to quench my thirst and abundant varieties of food germinate from seeds to nourish my body. Everywhere nature brings forth. The clouds, wind and rain draw me toward their eternal mystery. This world is designed to nurture and sustain life. I am part of that life, and I receive solace and comfort knowing that the world and I are both alive and vibrant. Both imbued with the same life force. This world nurtures me. I am open to abundance - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Listen to the message, not the messenger! This is what Tradition Twelve is all about, looking past the personality to the principle behind the message. There are some mighty slick personalities out there talking trash and some Big Book thumpers (irritating as they are) that have a true message of hope. The slicker, the sicker. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Contempt is not a spiritual gift. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I no longer struggle to find my answers alone. I welcome and am open to positive and healthy support wherever I find it. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I don't change because I've seen the light but because I have felt the heat. - Penny P.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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03-17-2024, 08:54 AM | #9 |
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March 24
Daily Reflections ACTIVE, NOT PASSIVE, p. 92 Man is supposed to think, and act. He wasn't made to God's image to be an automation. As Bill Sees It, p. 55 Before I joined A.A., I often did not think, and reacted to people and situations. When not reacting I acted in a mechanical fashion. After joining A.A., I started seeking daily guidance from a Power greater than myself, and learning to listen for that guidance. Then I began to make decisions and act on them, rather than react to them. The results have been constructive; I no longer allow others to make decisions for me and then criticize me for it. Today--and every day--with a heart full of gratitude, and a desire for God's will to be done through me, my life is worth sharing, especially with my fellow alcoholics! Above all, if I do not make a religion out of anything, even A.A., then I can be an open channel for God's expression. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Strength comes from honestly telling your own experiences with drinking. In religion, they call it confession. We call it witnessing or sharing. You give a personal witness, you share your past experiences, the troubles you got into, the hospitals, the jails, the break-up of your home, the money wasted, the debts, and all the foolish things you did when you were drinking. This personal witness lets out the things you had kept hidden, brings them out into the open, and you find release and strength. Am I receiving strength from my personal witnessing? Meditation For The Day We cannot fully understand the universe. The simple fact is that we cannot even define space or time, which we have manufactured by our own minds and on that depends all our so-called knowledge of the universe. The simple fact is that we can never know all things, nor are we made to know them. Much of our lives must be taken on faith. Prayer For The Day I pray that my faith may be based on my own experience of the power of God in my life. I pray that I may know this one thing above all else in the universe. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It We Cannot Live Alone, p. 83 All of A.A.'s Twelve Steps ask us to go contrary to our natural desires; they all deflate our egos. When it comes to ego deflation, few Steps are harder to take than the Fifth. Scarcely any Step is more necessary to long-time sobriety and peace of mind. A.A. experience has taught us we cannot live alone with our pressing problems and the character defects which cause or aggravate them. If Step Four has revealed in stark relief those experiences we'd rather not remember, then the need to quit living by ourselves with those tormenting ghosts of yesterday gets more urgent than ever. We have to talk to somebody about them. << << << >> >> >> We cannot wholly rely on friends to solve all our difficulties. A good adviser will never do all our thinking for us. He knows that each final choice must be ours. He will therefore help to eliminate fear, expediency, and self-deception, so enabling us to make choices which are loving, wise, and honest. 1. 12 & 12, p. 55 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places This Too Shall Pass____ Fortitude Growing older in sobriety, w soon become aware of the fact that both good and bad experiences eventually pass on. No matter how beautiful or ugly a situation becomes, it must change in time. In discussions, we catch this idea by reminding ourselves that "This too shall pass." We are very fortunate that this is true. Were it otherwise, intolerable conditions would last forever. Our business is to make sure that our own thoughts and actions lead to betterment, for ourselves and others. While we should be willing to accept unpleasantness if the re is no way of avoiding it, we should always hope…. And work….. for improvement. When unpleasant experiences do pass on. We must also be careful not to resurrect them by brooding about how badly we were treated or trying to get even with others. This only prolongs the trouble. The good news in AA is that we can survive any experience and put it behind us. Whatever I'm facing today, I'll know that it is temporary and has no power to keep me from the deeper happiness and gratitude I have in the 12 step program. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Love your enemy it will drive him nuts.Eleanor Doan Love you enemy. It’s a lot easier on you! Hating someone takes so much time and energy. Loving your enemy means, instead of trying to get even, you let your Higher Power handle that person. Of course, loving your enemy is also hard. It means giving up control. It means giving up self-will. We addicts naturally want to control things and people. This is where we turn to our program for help. We learn to love our enemies, not for some grand reason. We simply do it because hate can cause us to use alcohol or other drugs again. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, watch over my family, friends, and my enemies. Take from me my desire to control. Take from me all reasons to get high. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll list all my enemies. I’ll say each of their names, and then I’ll read the Third Step out loud. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Love has a hundred gentle ends. --Leonora Speyer Letting go is a process that is seldom easy. For many, its meaning is elusive. How do we "let go"? Letting go means removing our attention from a particular experience or person and putting our focus on the here and now. We hang on to the past, to past hurts, but also to past joys. We have to let the past pass. The struggle to hang on to it, any part of it, clouds the present. You can't see the possibilities today is offering if your mind is still drawn to what was. Letting go can be a gentle process. Our trust in our higher power and our faith that good will prevail, in spite of appearances, eases the process. And we must let each experience end, as its moment passes, whether it is good or bad, love or sorrow. It helps to remember that all experiences contribute to our growth and wholeness. No experience will be ignored by the inner self who is charting our course. All are parts of the journey. And every moment has a gentle end, but no moment is forgotten. My journey today is akin to yesterday's journey and tomorrow's too. I will savor each moment and be ready for the next. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES Among us are wives, relatives and friends whose problem has been solved, as well as some who have not yet found a happy solution. We want the wives of Alcoholics Anonymous to address the wives of men who drink too much. What they say will apply to nearly everyone bound by ties of blood or affection to an alcoholic. p. 104 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. I haven't mentioned it, but Charlie, my sponsor, was white, and when we got our group started, we got help from other white groups in Washington. They came, many of them, and stuck by us and told us how to hold meetings. They taught us a great deal about Twelfth Step work too. Indeed, without their aid we couldn't possibly have gone on. They saved us endless time and lost motion. And, not only that, but they gave us financial help. Even when we were paying that two dollars a night, they often paid it for us because our collection was so small. p. 244 - 245 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Finally, we begin to see that all people, including ourselves, are to some extent emotionally ill as well as frequently wrong, and then we approach true tolerance and see what real love for our fellows actually means. It will become more and more evident as we go forward that it is pointless to become angry, or to get hurt by people who, like us, are suffering from the pains of growing up. p. 92 ************************************************** ********* I keep my sobriety by giving it away. Humility does not mean you think less of yourself. It means you think of yourself less. --Ken Blanchard "Recovery is a path, not a sudden landing." --Sandra B "The two major sources of value today are time and knowledge. Find new ways every day to use them better." --Brian Tracy Action is the antidote to despair. --Joan Baez Even though our love may waiver, God's love for us never fails. --Howard Coop ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation LANGUAGE "Language is the light of the mind." John Stuart Mill When I was drinking, I never really thought about how I behaved, how I dressed or the language I used. Today I believe I should be responsible for the whole of me. Language is important because it is my bridge to others; it is also the vehicle for understanding the ideas of others. Spirituality involves the concept of language because it is the means of growth, communication and relationship. My words help me to be known. My ability to understand the ideas and aspirations of others helps me to feel that I belong. God is perceived in this world and the gift of language is one of the ways God is revealed. My words are spiritual. May the light of God's eternal truth be manifested in the way I talk and relate to others. ************************************************** ********* Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, the LORD, The Creator of the ends of the earth, Neither faints nor is weary. His understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the weak, And to those who have no might He increases strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, And the young men shall utterly fall, But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:28-31 "Don't let the world around you squeeze you into its own mold, but let God remold your minds from within, so that you may prove in practice that the plan of God for you is good, meets all His demands, and moves toward the goal of true maturity." Romans 12:2 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration A house becomes a home when it is filled with love and friendship. Lord, bless my life with laughter and many shared moments that I may in turn be a source of sunshine to others. Live as a responsible adult, but approach God as a child, full of faith and trust. You cannot help but perfect one by the other. Lord, You are my Father. Who else will so lovingly listen to me and care for my desires. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Letting Go Of The Past "It is not where we were that counts, but where we are going." Basic Text, pg.22 When we first find recovery, some of us feel shame or despair at calling ourselves "addicts." In the early days, we may be filled with both fear and hope as we struggle to find new meaning in our lives. The past may seem inescapable and overpowering. It may be hard to think of ourselves in any way other than the way we always have. While memories of the past can serve as reminders of what's waiting for us if we use again, they can also keep us stuck in a nightmare of shame and fear. Though it may be difficult to let go of those memories, each day in recovery can bring us that much farther away from our active addiction. Each day, we can find more to look forward to and less to punish ourselves for. In recovery, all doors are open to us. We have many choices. Our new life is rich and full of promise. While we cannot forget the past, we don't have to live in it. We can move on. Just for today: I will pack my bags and move out of my past into a present filled with hope. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The things we hate about ourselves aren't more real than things we like about ourselves. --Ellen Goodman It is so easy, and tempting, to get down on ourselves, to focus on an imperfect face, a dismal batting average, our fear of math, or our big feet. The trouble is, the more we feel sorry for ourselves, and the more we have to feel sorry about. And though it probably doesn't hurt to indulge in a little self-pity once in a while, how unfortunate--and limiting--it can be to let those attitudes define us. The things we hate about ourselves are no more real than the things we like about ourselves. The trick is to dwell on the things we like instead of those we don't. Even on days when we are sure we are the least lovable creatures in the world, we can "act as if" we like ourselves. What a surprise at the end of the day, to find out that we actually do! What can I like about myself today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I don't like a man to be too efficient. He's likely to be not human enough. --Felix Frankfurter On our path we seek balance. Pursuing any single value and ignoring another, whether it is efficiency, hard work, or leisure, will make one sided men of us. Psychology tells us our right brain is the creative, intuitive side and our left brain is the concrete, fact gathering side. Spending our energies developing only one part of ourselves will leave us incomplete. We males have been taught we should be decisive, practical, and have our feet on the ground. As men we are also creative and sensitive. We think in stories, pictures, and metaphors and we love music. At our best, we are willing to place people and relationships ahead of things and goals. When we are wisest and most human, we draw on the many sides of ourselves. Today, I will use both the creative, intuitive part of me and the practical, decisive part that can get a job done. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Love has a hundred gentle ends. --Leonora Speyer Letting go is a process that is seldom easy. For many, its meaning is elusive. How do we "let go"? Letting go means removing our attention from a particular experience or person and putting our focus on the here and now. We hang on to the past, to past hurts, but also to past joys. We have to let the past pass. The struggle to hang on to it, any part of it, clouds the present. You can't see the possibilities today is offering if your mind is still drawn to what was. Letting go can be a gentle process. Our trust in our higher power and our faith that good will prevail, in spite of appearances, eases the process. And we must let each experience end, as its moment passes, whether it is good or bad, love or sorrow. It helps to remember that all experiences contribute to our growth and wholeness. No experience will be ignored by the inner self who is charting our course. All are parts of the journey. And every moment has a gentle end, but no moment is forgotten. My journey today is akin to yesterday's journey and tomorrow's too. I will savor each moment and be ready for the next. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Appreciating Ourselves We are the greatest things that will ever happen to us. Believe it. It makes life much easier. --Codependent No More It is time to stop this nonsense of running around picking on ourselves. We may have walked through much of our life apologizing for ourselves either directly or indirectly - feeling less valuable than others, believing that they know better than we do, and believing that somehow others are meant to be here and we are not. We have a right to be here. We have a right to be ourselves. We are here. There is a purpose, a reason, and an intention for our life. We do not have to apologize for being here or being who we are. We are good enough, and deserving. Others do not have our magic. We have our magic. It is in us. It doesn't matter what we've done in our past. We all have a past, woven with mistakes, successes, and learning experiences. We have a right to our past. It is ours. It has worked to shape and form us. As we progress on this journey, we shall see how each of our experiences will be turned around and used for good. We have already spent too much time being ashamed, being apologetic, and doubting the beauty of ourselves. Be done with it. Let it go. It is an unnecessary burden. Others have rights, but so do we. We are neither less than nor more than. We are equal. We are who we are. That is whom we were created and intended to be. That, my friend, is a wonderful gift. God, help me own my power to love and appreciate myself. Help me give myself validity instead of looking to others to do that. I forgive myself and all others today. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Tap into Life’s Energy Life is not something separate or apart from you, as you once believed. There is a power, a life force, that moves, guides, directs, and inspires you. You are one with life, with life’s energy. Do things that energize you, charge your soul. Soak up the sun. Soak up color. Soak up beautiful sounds. Immerse yourself in nature, in a world the refreshes, restores, and renews. Don’t worry about the task or the day that looms ahead, the work, and love and play, the problems and choices that are on the way. If you energize yourself, restore yourself, the power to take action will come naturally like water from a spring. Look around. What do you see that feels right to do? Which direction do you see as the right way to go? Trust the smallest glimmer. Give in to the urge, to the guidance that’s there. Do it once. Do it again. Soon you will find yourself in harmony. You will have all the guidance, energy, ideas, creativity, power, and ability you need to do all you’re meant to do. And you will be given the power to enjoy it. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Cultivate inner peace According to my experience, the principle characteristic of genuine happiness is peace, inner peace. –His Holiness the Dalai Lama Cultivate a sense of peace, an abiding inner peace that doesn’t depend on outward circumstance. So much chaos, so much drama, so many emotions surge through us. It is so easy, so tempting to believe that once we get through this circumstance, once we achieve this goal, once we solve this problem, then we will be peaceful. That’s an illusion. “I’m happy when I get what I want,” said Kent. “For a few minutes.” Getting what we want may cause us to feel happy for a moment, but it will bring a limited, transient happiness. The next problem or emotion will present itself. Or we will begin resenting that person or job, because he, she, or it did not bring the happiness we believed it would. Like a carrot on a stick, happiness will always be the next problem, acquisition, or emotion away. Be peaceful now. Be happy now. Take the limits off your joy. God, help me remember to be peaceful first, no matter what situation I face. ****************************************** A Great Teacher Living Like Water The journey of water as it flows upon the earth can be a mirror of our own paths through life. Water begins its residence on earth as it falls from the sky or melts from ice and streams down a mountain into a tributary or stream. In the same way, we come into the world and begin our lives on earth. Like a river that flows within the confines of its banks, we are born with certain defining characteristics that govern our identity. We are born in a specific time and place, within a specific family, and with certain gifts and challenges. Within these parameters, we move through life, encountering many twists, turns, and obstacles along the way just as a river flows. Water is a great teacher that shows us how to move through the world with grace, ease, determination, and humility. When a river breaks at a waterfall, it gains energy and moves on, as we encounter our own waterfalls, we may fall hard but we always keep moving on. Water can inspire us to not become rigid with fear or cling to what’s familiar. Water is brave and does not waste time clinging to its past, but flows onward without looking back. At the same time, when there is a hole to be filled, water does not run away from it in fear of the dark; instead, water humbly and bravely fills the empty space. In the same way, we can face the dark moments of our life rather than run away from them. Eventually, a river will empty into the sea. Water does not hold back from joining with a larger body, nor does it fear a loss of identity or control. It gracefully and humbly tumbles into the vastness by contributing its energy and merging without resistance. Each time we move beyond our individual egos to become part of something bigger, we can try our best to follow the lead of the river. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day All of us are faced with the troubles and problems of daily living, whether we’ve been in The Program two days or 20 years. We’d sometimes like to beieve we could ake care of all our problems right now, but it rarely works that way If we remember the slogan “Easy Does It” when we are ready to panic, we mayb come to know that the very best way to handle all things is “Easy.” We put one foot in front of the other, doing the best we are capapble of doing. We say “Easy Does It.” and we do it. Are The Pogram’s slognas gtwoing with me as I grow with The Program? Today I Pray May even the words “Easy Des It’ serve to slow me down in my hadlong rush to accomplis too much too fast. May just that world “Easy” be enough to make me ease up on he ships that drive my ambitions, ease up on the accelerator which plunges me into new situations without enough forethought, ese off on the number of hours spent in material pursuits. May I hark to the adage that Rome wasn’t built in a single day. Niether can I builde solutions to my problems all at once. Today I Will Remember Easy Does It. ****************************************** One More Day Our safety is not in blindness, but in facing our danger. – Johann Cristoph Schiller Sometimes our difficulties are compounded when we take more drugs than needed to treat our illnesses. This can be due to our getting prescriptions from than one doctor or from using over-the-counter drugs in addition to our prescribed medications. Certainly, we need to use the drugs that will keep us as healthy and functional as possible, but over medication can be an accidental side-effect of chronic medical problems. Also, psychological or physical dependence can also occur. Besides necessary medications, the joy of living and the love of ourselves and others can help us deal with our illnesses. By learning to live with our limitations we can gain back some of the personal power that chronic illness has taken from us. I am strengthened by facing my problems. ************************************ Food For Thought Action Ours is a program of Action. It does no good to develop new awareness if we do not take appropriate new actions. When we become aware of the damage done by compulsive overeating and realize that OA has the answer to our problem, we take action by going to meetings, making phone calls, and working the steps. We follow a food plan and abstain from eating compulsively. Taking inventory, admitting our mistakes, and making amends involves action. Our Higher Power gives us courage to change the things we can. He gives us the confidence to get involved in new activities, to be more assertive, to make new friends, to go back to school, to change jobs. By abstaining from the type of eating that paralyzed us, we have strength and energy to do new things. One step at a time, we are led into action. Not to move according to the direction of God as we understand Him is to fall backwards and stagnate. Each positive action we take strengthens our recovery. Direct my actions, Lord. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Positive Thinking "It takes but one positive when given a chance to survive and thrive to overpower and entire army of negative thoughts." Robert H. Schuller A positive attitude is crucial for a successful recovery. This summer, I wasn laid up with two torn tendons in my left ankle. This happened right at the start of my summer vacation. When it first happened, I was VERY dejected. This had to happen NOW!!! Just when my holidays are starting? (not that ANY time is a good time to receive an injury!). However, upon reflection it WAS good timing. I didn't have get myself to and from work. My daughter was finished school for the summer and was able to be home to assist me with day to day stuff. Plus I had just taken on some new OA service responsibilities and being home allowed me the time to really focus and internalize my new roles. Instead of looking at this as a negative - I think HP gave me an opportunity here to rest up and do some service at the same time. My daughter and I did some wonderful bonding as well. It would have been very easy just to turn negative and feel sorry for myself . But I simply would have made myself (and everyone around me) miserable during the my six weeks of recovery. Instead, it's turned out to be a wonderful learning experience (not to mention it provided a good idea for this meditation topic!). Life's too short for cheap wHine, n'est past? One Day at a Time . . . I will look at life from a positive point of view. ~ Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote 'The way you fellows put this spiritual stuff makes sense. - Pg. 159 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Do you sometimes feel like fate made a fool of you with this disease? This is a normal reaction to any chronic disease just like diabetes, lupus, or others. We are the fortunate ones because we can arrest this disease with a simple behavior change, many others can't. God, as I understand You, grant me the willingness to be grateful for a way out of this devastating disease of addiction. Golden Moments I will pay attention to guidance from within and without. There are moments when I know I am doing what lights my spirit and challenges me. Moments when I feel alive and in tune; in touch with a force beyond me that is guiding me towards something that's right for me. Those moments are golden. They carry me through my fears and hard times, they sustain me when inevitable doubts creep in, they give me strength to carry on and stay on course. I will hold inspiration close to me heart. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote They say you don't have to like your sponsor; they just have to have something you want-like a life. It is your sponsor's job to give you a program to work until you develop a program of your own. People who sponsor themselves have fools for sponsors. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Action Not Distraction Time for Joy - Book - Quote I forgive myself and all others today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote There are two types of people to watch in AA; those who make it, and those who don't. - Dr. Bob S.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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03-17-2024, 08:55 AM | #10 |
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March 25
Daily Reflections A FULL AND THANKFUL HEART I try hard to hold fast to the truth that a full and thankful heart cannot entertain certain conceits. When brimming with gratitude, one's heartbeat must surely result in outgoing love, the finest emotion that we can ever know. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 37 I believe that we in Alcoholics Anonymous are fortunate in that we are constantly reminded of the need to be grateful and of how important gratitude is in our sobriety. I am truly grateful for the sobriety God has given me through the A.A. program and am glad I can give back what was given to me freely. I am grateful not only for sobriety, but for the quality of life my sobriety has brought. God has been gracious enough to give me sober days and a life blessed with peace and contentment, as well as the ability to give and receive love, and the opportunity to serve others -- in our Fellowship, my family and community. For all of this, I have "a full and thankful heart." ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Strength comes from coming to believe in a Higher Power that can help you. You can't define this Higher Power, but you can see how it helps other alcoholics. You hear them talk about it and you begin to get the idea yourself. You try praying in a quiet time each morning and you begin to feel stronger, as though your prayers were heard. So you gradually come to believe there must be a Power in the world outside of yourself, which is stronger than you and which you can turn to for help. Am I receiving strength from my faith in a Higher Power? Meditation For The Day Spiritual development is achieved by daily persistence in living the way you believe God wants you to live. Like the wearing away of a stone by steady drops of water, so will your daily persistence wear away all the difficulties and gain spiritual success for you. Never falter in this daily, steady persistence. Go forward boldly and unafraid. God will help and strengthen you, as long as you are trying to do His will. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may persist day by day in gaining spiritual experience. I pray that I may make this a lifetime work. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Benefits of Responsibility, p. 84 "Happily, A.A.'s per capita expenses are very low. For us to fail to meet them would be to evade a responsibility beneficial for us. "Most alcoholics have said they had no troubles that money would not cure. We are a group that, when drinking, always held out a hand for funds. So when we commence to pay our own service bills, this is a healthy change." << << << >> >> >> "Because of drinking, my friend Henry had lost a high-salaried job. There remained a fine house--with a budget three times his reduced earnings. "He could have rented the house for enough to carry it. But no! Henry said he knew that God wanted him to live there, and He would see that the costs were paid. So Henry went on running up bills and glowing with faith. Not surprisingly, his creditors finally took over the place. "Henry can laugh about it now, having learned that God more often helps those who are willing to help themselves." 1. Letter, 1960 2. Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Expect Miracles____Belief Some have claimed that there have been no miracles since the fourteenth century. This is a smug way of saying that miracles do not happen. Emmet Fox conceded that miracles don't happen in the sense of violating the perfect, universal system of law and order. But there is such a thing as appealing to a higher law, and this too is part of the constitution of the universe. Prayer is a means of doing this, and enough prayer will get you out of any difficulty, Fox insisted. People who have found sobriety in AA are actually modern miracles. They expect more miracles to continue happening" otherwise, there would be no point in continuing to work with newcomers. And while we're expecting miracles, let's remember that countless other human problems will yield to a spiritual approach. Life itself is miraculous when we study it: why shouldn't there be more miracles ahead? I'll keep an open mind on the subject of miracles. Since we still can glipmse only a fragment of the universe, it should follow that there's also much more to learn about the spiritual processes that rescued us from alcoholism. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The artist who aims at perfection in everything achieves it in nothing.---Eugene Delacroix Trying to be prefect puts distance between us and our Higher Power. Trying to be perfect shows we're ashamed of being human. In recovery, we accept that we're human. We try to be the best human we can be. We used to get high to feel powerful and god-like. But God is not just power. God is also gentleness. Gentleness and love are the power we look for on recovery. We work to be human. We work to know the loving, gentle side of ourselves and our Higher Power. Remember, if we try to be god, we'll fail. If we try to be human, we'll win. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me give up trying to be perfect. Help me always keep in mind that I'm human---which means, I'm not perfect. Action for the Day: Part of being human is making mistakes. Today, I'll see my mistakes as chances to learn. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning When I slow down long enough to smell the roses, I usually see the beauty and all else that is ours to share. --Morgan Jennings We overlook so many joys, so many hidden treasures, when we hurry from place to place, person to person, experience to experience, with little attention anywhere. All that matters passes before us now, at this moment. And assuredly, we will not pass this way again. It has been said the greatest gift we can give one another is rapt attention; additionally, living life fully attentive to the breezes, the colors, the sorrows and the thrills as well, is the most prayerful response any of us can make in this life. Nothing more is asked of us. Nothing less is expected. We have just this one life to live, and each day is a blessing. Even the trials we shall understand as blessings in the months, the years ahead, as we can see now how the painful moments of the past played their part. Our attitude toward the lessons life has offered makes all the difference in the world. I will look closely at everything in my path today. The women and children, the trees and squirrels, the silent neighbors. I will never see them again as I see them today. I will be at attention. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES As wives of Alcoholics Anonymous, we would like you to feel that we understand as perhaps few can. We want to analyze mistakes we have made. We want to leave you with the feeling that no situation is too difficult and no unhappiness too great to be overcome. p. 104 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. At this time I wasn't working. Vi was taking care of me, and I was devoting all my time to the building of that group. I worked at that alone for six months. I just gathered up this and that alcoholic, because, in the back of my mind, I wanted to save all the world. I had found this new "something," and I wanted to give it to everyone who had a problem. We didn't save the world, but we did manage to help some individuals. That's my story of what A.A. has done for me. p. 245 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Such a radical change in our outlook will take time, maybe a lot of time. Not many people can truthfully assert that they love everybody. Most of us must admit that we have loved but a few; that we have been quite indifferent to the many so long as none of them gave us trouble; and as for the remainder--well, we have really disliked or hated them. Although these attitudes are common enough, we A.A.'s find we need something much better in order to keep our balance. We can't stand it if we hate deeply. The idea that we can be possessively loving of a few, can ignore the many, and can continue to fear or hate anybody, has to be abandoned, if only a little at a time. pp. 92-93 ************************************************** ********* Nine requisites for contented living: Health enough to make work a pleasure. Wealth enough to support your needs. Strength to battle with difficulties and overcome them. Grace enough to confess your sins and forsake them. Patience enough to toil until some good is accomplished. Charity enough to see some good in your neighbor. Love enough to move you to be useful and helpful to others. Faith enough to make real the things of God. Hope enough to remove all the anxious fears concerning the future. --Johann von Goethe "The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." --Chinese proverb "All fortune belongs to him who has a contented mind." --The Panchatantra "If we lead good lives, the times are also good. As we are, such are the times." --St. Augustine Wise sayings often fall on barren ground; but a kind word is never thrown away." --Sir Arthur Helps ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PERSEVERANCE "I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by a conscious endeavor." -- Henry David Thoreau Life is exciting to me when I am creating, when I am pursuing a dream, when I am making miracles in my life. I suppose "perseverance" stems from a belief that things get better when we roll-up our sleeves and do something. Sobriety is about comprehending that in our lives we reflect the message. God has created man with the ability to make the dream come true; this is not to say it is easy . . . but it is harder not to dream! Teach us to wonder at the stars with a spade in our hands. ************************************************** ********* Oh, give thanks to the LORD! Call upon His name; Make known His deeds among the peoples! Sing to Him, sing psalms to Him; Talk of all His wondrous works! Glory in His holy name; Let the hearts of those rejoice who seek the LORD! Seek the LORD and His strength; Seek His face evermore. Psalm 105:1-4 My peace I give you ... Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Things are not always what they seem, so take time to think before you react. Lord, grant me patience and resolve when I have the urge to assume the worst or jump to false conclusions. Knowing about God and knowing God are very different things. Lord, may I recognize Your workings in my life so that I may really know You. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today I Can't, But We Can "From the isolation of our addiction, we find a fellowship of people with a common bond... Our faith, strength, and hope come from people sharing their recovery..." Basic Text, pg.94-95 Admit no weakness, conceal all shortcomings, deny every failure, go it alone-that was the creed many of us followed. We denied that we were powerless over our addiction, that our lives had become unmanageable, despite all evidence to the contrary. Many of us took our First Step only when we had evidence that addicts could recover in Narcotics Anonymous. In NA, we find others who've been in the same predicament, with the same needs, who've found tools that work for them. These addicts are willing to share those tools with us and gibe us the emotional support we need as we learn to use them. Recovering addicts know how important the help of others can be because they've been given that help themselves. When we become a part of Narcotics Anonymous, we join a society of addicts like ourselves, a group of people who know that we help one another recover. Just for today: I will join in the bond of recovery. I will find the experience, strength, and hope I need in the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. My most irrational fear is that I've forgotten how to cook. --Pam Sherman Once there was a teacher who was having nightmares about doing a good job. In one dream, he couldn't find his classroom and he had to run from building to building. In another dream, he started teaching the lesson in the middle of the woods and didn't notice he was in the wrong place! Then one Sunday morning, he read an article about a wonderful baker. She baked every day, started bakeries, and fixed food for her friends, yet when the reporter asked her about her fears, she said, "My most irrational fear is that I've forgotten how to cook." Suddenly the man felt better. He realized someone else had the same kinds of fears. In a miraculous way, our fears become less powerful when we discover that we share them with other people. What fear can I share with someone right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I don't want everyone to like me; I should think less of myself if some people did. --Henry James Many of us have learned to control the responses of others by always being pleasing and charming. Maybe we feel it's better to have others like us than to take a stand. Maybe we only feel okay about ourselves if others approve. Some of us have certainly learned we have a sense of power and control over people when they like us. Many of us have carried our people pleasing behavior so far that we have really sold our souls for the applause of others. Are there problems or tensions in our lives from trying to please someone? Is fear of criticism preventing us from taking an action that would be good for us? Have we neglected our inner voice by listening so hard to others? As we get stronger, healthier, more fully into our manhood, not everyone will like us. Some people will be angry; others, not interested. Once we have faced our own life crises, we are not so dependent on having everyone's approval. I pray for God's blessing upon the man I'm becoming. I will let go of this need to please everyone. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. When I slow down long enough to smell the roses, I usually see the beauty and all else that is ours to share. --Morgan Jennings We overlook so many joys, so many hidden treasures, when we hurry from place to place, person to person, experience to experience, with little attention anywhere. All that matters passes before us now, at this moment. And assuredly, we will not pass this way again. It has been said the greatest gift we can give one another is rapt attention; additionally, living life fully attentive to the breezes, the colors, the sorrows and the thrills as well, is the most prayerful response any of us can make in this life. Nothing more is asked of us. Nothing less is expected. We have just this one life to live, and each day is a blessing. Even the trials we shall understand as blessings in the months, the years ahead, as we can see now how the painful moments of the past played their part. Our attitude toward the lessons life has offered makes all the difference in the world. I will look closely at everything in my path today. The women and children, the trees and squirrels, the silent neighbors. I will never see them again as I see them today. I will be at attention. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Letting Go of Worry What if we knew for certain that everything were worried about today will work out fine? What if . . . we had a guarantee that the problem bothering us would be worked out in the most perfect way, and at the best possible time? Furthermore, what if we knew that three years from now wed be grateful for that problem, and it solution? What if . . . we knew that even our worst fear would work out for the best? What if . . . we had a guarantee that everything that's happening, and has happened, in our life was meant to be, planned just for us, and in our best interest? What if . . . we had a guarantee that the people we love are experiencing exactly what they need in order to become who they're intended to become? Further, what if we had a guarantee that others can be responsible for themselves, and we don't have to control or take responsibility for them? What if . . . we knew the future was going to be good, and we would have an abundance of resources and guidance to handle whatever comes our way? What if . . . we knew everything was okay, and we didn't have to worry about a thing? What would we do then? We'd be free to let go and enjoy life. Today, I will know that I don't have to worry about anything. If I do worry, I will do it with the understanding that I am choosing to worry, and it is not necessary. My Higher Power is with me in the sun as well as the rain, in pain as well as joy. As long as I know I am protected by the power of faith and love, I will remain centered and balanced throughout all of this day. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Break Through Your Blocks I was walking at a good clip down sandy Colony Beach when it happened. Without warning, I began running. I ran the longest distance I had ever before run. Instead of collapsing in a panting heap, I kept running. Another stretch. Then another. By the time I tired, I had run a mile. The furthest I had ever before run in my life was about a quarter block. I didn’t intend to make this breakthrough. I was so blocked in this area I didn’t think I could. Running wasn’t even a goal. I had simply incorporated regular walks into my lifestyle as a way of exercising my body. This event surprised me because I’m not a physical fitness buff. I hadn’t been allowed to participate in any physical education or sports activities as a child or teenager because of chronic health ailments. I spent many years neglecting my body. Lately, I had put some effort into connecting with my body and working out in an amateurish fashion. But running? Not me. Or so I used to think. The next time I went walking, I felt timid, almost afraid to even try running. I wondered if what I had experienced was a fluke. It wasn’t. I ran again and again. Now, running is a regular part of my physical activity, one I truly enjoy. Sometimes, we’re so blocked in a particular area we don’t even consider a breakthrough a possibility. We’re so blocked we don’t even see our blocks. Stay open. Don’t limit yourself. Something that yesterday seemed entirely unfeasable and forever beyond your grasp may tomorrow, next month, next year– or today– become something you can do naturally, something that’s available to you. It can come as a total surprise, in an area you hadn’t considered. Your breakthrough may happen in an area you’ve been struggling with and working on. Life is more than setbacks, and it’s not static. Appreciate and respect where you are now. But let yourself move to the next level when it’s time. Celebrate your breakthroughs when they come. Listen to that quiet voice, that fleeting thought that says, Why don’t you…? even if it’s something you’ve never done before. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Let go of resentments Resentments are sneaky, tricky little things. They can convince us they’re justified. They can dry up our hearts. They can sabotage our happiness. They can sabotage love. Most of us have been at the receiving end of an injustice at some time in our lives. Most of us know someone who’s complained of an injustice we’ve done to him or her. Life can be a breeding ground for resentments, if we let it. “Yes, but this time I really was wronged,” we complain. Maybe you were. But harboring a resentment isn’t the solution. If it was, our resentment list would resemble the Los Angeles telephone directory. Deal with your feelings. Learn whatever lesson is at hand. Then let the feelings go. Resentments are a coping behavior, a tool of someone settling for survival in life. They’re a form of revenge. The problem is, no matter who we’re resenting, the anger is ultimately directed against ourselves. Take a moment. Search your heart. Have you tricked yourself into harboring a resentment? If you have, take another moment and let that resentment go. God, grant me the serenity that acceptance brings. ****************************************** The Road to New Beginnings Completion by Madisyn Taylor Just as new beginnings are important, so is honoring the experience of closure. Life is a collage of beginnings and endings that run together like still-wet paint. Yet before we can begin any new phase in life, we must sometimes first achieve closure to the current stage we are in. That’s because many of life’s experiences call for closure. Often, we cannot see the significance of an event or importance of a lesson until we have reached closure. Or, we may have completed a certain phase in life or path of learning and want to honor that ending. It is this sense of completion that frees us to open the door to new beginnings. Closure serves to tie up or sever loose ends, quiets the mind even when questions have been left unanswered, signifies the end of an experience, and acknowledges that a change has taken place. The period of completion, rather than being just an act of finality, is also one of transition. When we seek closure, what we really want is an understanding of what has happened and an opportunity to derive what lessons we can from an experience. Without closure, there is no resolution and we are left to grieve, relive old memories to the point of frustration, or remain forever connected to people from our past. A sense of completion regarding a situation may also result when we accept that we have done our best. If you can’t officially achieve closure with someone, you can create completion by participating in a closure ritual. Write a farewell letter to that person and then burn your note during a ceremony. This ritual allows you to consciously honor and appreciate what has taken place between you and release the experience so you can move forward. Closure can help you let go of feelings of anger or uncertainty regarding your past even as you honor your experience – whether good or bad - as a necessary step on your life’s path. Closure allows you to emotionally lay to rest issues and feelings that may be weighing down your spirit. When you create closure, you affirm that you have done what was needed, are wiser because of your experience, and are ready for whatever life wants to bring you next. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day If a chemically-dependent person wants to live successfully in society, he or she must replace the power of chemicals over his/her life with the power of something else — preferably positive, at least neutral, but not negative. That is why we say to the agnostic newcomer: If you can’t believe in God, find a positive power that is as great as the power of your addiction, and give it the power and dependence you gave to your addiction. In The Program, the agnostic is left free to find his or her Higher Power, and can use the principles of The Program and the therapy of the meetings to aid in rebuilding his/her life. Do I go out of my way to work with newcomers? Today I Pray May the Power of The Program work its miracles equally for those who believe in a personal God or in a Universal Spirit or in the strength of the group itself, or for those who define their Higher Power in their own terms, religious or not. If newcomers are disturbed by the religiosity of The Program, may I welcome them on their own spiritual terms May I recognize that we are all spiritual beings. Today I Will Remember To each his own spirituality. ****************************************** One More Day Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world. – Arthur Schopenhauer It’s not easy to get used to the idea of a “forever” kind of illness. When we first learned about it, we may have allowed it to overtake our lies. Perhaps we lost the pleasure of taking a walk, playing a card game with friends, or spending time helping others. We were obsessed with the memory of how life used to be. We can learn to put illness into its correct position. We have the chronic condition; it doesn’t own us. We will know we have reached true acceptance when the medical issue doesn’t dominate our days. Of course a chronic illness affects us, but now we an see it properly as only one facet of our lives. We can choose to once again have full and meaningful days. I — not my illness — can choose how well and how fully I will live my life. ************************************ Food For Thought Living Day by Day "Life by the mile is a trial; by the inch it's a cinch." In the past, we got into trouble when we thought we had to have our lives mapped out forever. That just did not work. We need only deal with the problems and joys of today. If we try to see too far ahead, we lose touch with the reality of the here and now. The Lord lets us know what we need to know when we need to know it. What seems impossible when looked at in total --writing a book, putting the children through college, abstaining for the rest of our lives -- becomes manageable when worked at step-by-step, day-by-day. So many of the things we worry about never happen. How much better it is to concentrate our energies on the real demands and challenges of today, insignificant as they may seem. When we turn our lives over to our Higher Power, we trust Him to manage the master plan and to direct us in the small details of living each day. Show me, Lord, how to best live each day. I leave the years to You. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Present Moment "Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate on the present moment." Buddha Staying focused, serene and receptive requires that we keep our attention placed in the present moment. If we allow our minds to be overly focused in the future (ie on outcomes such as "what if's" or "if only's") or in the past (ie past resentments, past embarrassments, or "would've beens, "could've beens") we allow ourselves to be subject to the psychological and emotional roller coaster ride that can go with these states. These meanderings into the past or present, colour our judgement and play a major role in contributing to our eating disorder. Therefore, it is imperative that we practise staying in the moment in order to maintain a healthy recovery. One Day at a Time . . . I will choose to live in the serenity of the present moment. ~ Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We realize that we have been giving you much direction and advice. We may have seemed to lecture. If that is so we are sorry, for we ourselves don't always care for people who lecture us. But what we have related is based upon experience, some of it painful. We had to learn these things the hard way. That is why we are anxious that you understand, and that you avoid these unnecessary difficulties. - Pg. 121 - To Wives Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The restless changing tides of the sea seem to parallel our recovery. The tide comes in, the tide goes out. A fact of life. Whatever is high tide in your emotion now, will eventually ebb to low tide. Remember: This too shall pass. Help me recognize that my emotions are like the tides of the sea. Nothing is forever. This too shall pass. Loving Myself through Action I want to do something special for myself today. Giving to others and withholding from myself doesn't work. I tend to treat other people the way that I treat myself. If I am stingy with me, I will, somewhere along the line, act that out with other people. If I am hard on myself, I will tend to be hard on others. I am the only person who is with me all hours of the day and I know what feels good and warm to me. I know what makes me feel sustained from within. Today, I will encourage, support and congratulate myself. Each time I do something that pleases me I'll say 'thank you' to myself. Each time I do something well, I'll tell myself 'good job.' I will be my own best cheerleader. I will encourage and support myself. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When one door closes, another door opens. It's waiting in the hallway that's hell. I am not a slow learner. I am just, sometimes, a slow accepter. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book No matter how fast or how far you go, you can't outrun God. Time for Joy - Book - Quote My Higher Power is with me in the sun as well as the rain, in pain as well as joy. As long as I know I am protected by the power of faith and love, I will remain centered and balanced throughout all of this day. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote This old codger saying he'd spilt more than I'd drunk. I thought; 'If you hadn't spilt so much you might have got here earlier.' - Anon.
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March 26
Daily Reflections THE TEACHING IS NEVER OVER Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny. May God bless you and keep you -- until then. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 164 These words put a lump in my throat each time I read them. In the beginning it was because I felt, "Oh no! The teaching is over. Now I'm on my own. It will never be this new again." Today I feel deep affection for the A.A. pioneers when I read this passage, realizing that it sums up all of what I believe in, and strive for, and that -- with God's blessing -- the teaching is never over, I'm never on my own, and every day is brand new. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Strength comes also from working with other alcoholics. When you are trying to help a new prospect with the program, you are building up your own strength at the same time. You see the other person in the condition you might be in yourself and it makes your resolve to stay sober stronger than ever. Often, you help yourself more than the other person, but if you do succeed in helping the prospect to get sober, you are stronger from the experience of having helped another person. Am I receiving strength from helping others? Meditation For The Day Faith is the bridge between you and God. It is the bridge which God had ordained. If all were seen and known, there would be no merit in doing right. Therefore God has ordained that we do not see or know directly. But we can experience the power of His spirit through our faith. It is the bridge between us and Him, which we can take or not, as we will. There could be no morality without free will. We must make the choice ourselves. We must make the venture of belief. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may choose and decide to cross the bridge of faith. I pray that by crossing this bridge I may receive the spiritual power I need. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Life Is Not A Dead End, p. 85 When a man or a woman has a spiritual awakening, the most important meaning of it is that he has now become able to do, feel, and believe that which he could not do before on his unaided strength and resources alone. He has been granted a gift which amounts to a new state of consciousness and being. He has been set on a path which tells him he is really going somewhere, that life is not a dead end, not something to be endured or mastered. In a very real sense he has been transformed, because he has laid hold of a source of strength which he had hitherto denied himself. 12 & 12, pp. 106-107 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places I can't.... God can.... I think I'll let God Guidance One of the delusions that keep alcoholics in bondage is the belief in the power of the personal will. "I still think I'm strong enough to whip it," alcoholics have declared defiantly, just before heading out for another debacle. Willpower has a role in recovery, but only in making a decision to turn the problem over to Higher Power. This sets in motion powerful forces that come to our assistance. We don't know how and why this process works as it does. We do know that it has worked repeatedly for those who sincerely apply it in their lives. What's needed to start the process is an admission of defeat, a willingness to seek a Higher Power, and at least enough open-minded-ness to give it all a fair chance. The outcome can be very surprising. There's also no need to be apologetic about our Higher Power after we've found sobriety. Nobody had a better plan, and we can remember that other severe problems can be handled in the same way. I'll do my best today to solve every problem and meet every responsibility. If something is too much for me, I'll turn it over in the same way I did my drinking problem. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple We are here to add what we can to, not to get what we can get from, Life. Sir William Osler Service is a word we hear in our recovery program. Service means work we do for others. It's the backbone of our program. The reason is simple. Service to our Higher Power and to others breaks down our wanting to be self-centered. Service brings us back into the world. We really are part of the group when we pitch in to make coffee, set up chairs, or talk in meetings. We really feel like part of the family when we run errands and help with meals and housework. We really connect with our Higher Power when we pray, "Use me today to help others." Service breaks down the feeling of being alone that being self -centered brings. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to be of service to You and others. Show me what is needed. Action for the Day: Today will be a service day. I'll see how valued I am. I'll give to others, knowing that I, too, will receive. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning To believe in something not yet proved and to underwrite it with our lives; it is the only way we can leave the future open. --Lillian Smith Today stands before us, ready for our involvement. And it will offer us opportunities for personal growth and occasions to help another make progress on her path to the future. Challenges are to be expected. They further our purpose. They foster our maturity. How different it is, for many of us, to look forward today with secure anticipation, to trust in what the future holds! We can still remember, all too vividly perhaps, the darker periods in our lives, periods that seemed to hold no promise; a time when we dreaded the future, fearing it would only compound those awful times. The fear and the dread are not gone completely. They hover about us, on occasion. They no longer need to darken all of a day, however. We can recognize their presence as parts of our whole, not all of it. How free we are, today! Our choices are many. I can step toward today with assurance, reaching out to others along the way, trusting that my accumulated steps add stability to my future. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES We have traveled a rocky road, there is no mistake about that. We have had long rendezvous with hurt pride, frustration, self-pity, misunderstanding and fear. These are not pleasant companions. We have been driven to maudlin sympathy, to bitter resentment. Some of us veered from extreme to extreme, ever hoping that one day our loved ones would be themselves once more. pp. 104-105 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Man Who Mastered Fear He spent eighteen years in running away, and then found he didn't have to run. So he started A.A. in Detroit. For eighteen years, from the time I was twenty-one, fear governed my life. By the time I was thirty, I had found that alcohol dissolved fear---for a little while. In the end I had tow problems instead of one: fear and alcohol. p. 246 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." We can try to stop making unreasonable demands upon those we love. We can show kindness where we had shown none. With those we dislike we can begin to practice justice and courtesy, perhaps going out of our way to understand and help them. Whenever we fail any of these people, we can promptly admit it--to ourselves always, and to them also, when the admission would be helpful. Courtesy, kindness, justice, and love are the keynotes by which we may come into harmony with practically anybody. When in doubt we can always pause, saying, "Not my will, but Thine, be done." And we can often ask ourselves, "Am I doing to others as I would have them do to me--today?" p. 93 ************************************************** ********* Like a tree blowing in the wind, friendships can bend and waver, yet they will both remain standing if they have strong roots. --Suzanne Long To the world you're just one person but to one person you could mean the world. --Anon There is light within a person of light, And it shines on the whole world. --The gospel of Thomas ". . . I saw people willing to compromise themselves, or change themselves, to acquire what they thought was important. I don't judge what other people do, many choices that may be right for others are definitely not right for me." --Kathy Ireland God is singing and Creation is the melody. --David Palmer Forgiveness restores us and our relationships. --J. Keith Brown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation TEACHING "The art of teaching is the art of assisting discovery." -- Mark Van Doren I have a need of a "sponsor" in my life. Somebody I turn to when I have problems, when I am confused or in pain, when I simply need to talk, when I feel lonely or when I am about to make a major change in my life. Every addict needs a sponsor; somebody to bounce ideas off, especially ideas that affect the living of my life because I truly understand that the disease of alcoholism lives in my life! My sponsor guides, suggests and gently leads me to where I need to go; he does not demand or dictate. My sponsor is a friend whom I can trust, and he makes a point of not being a "fixer" in my life. He will not allow me to escape into his life. He will not allow me to become addicted to him. O God, let me always be free enough to discover You in my life. ************************************************** ********* Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:6-7 "You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world." I John 4:4 A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed." Proverbs 11:25 Blessed is the man who finds wisdom, the man who gains understanding. Proverbs 3:13 "The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever." 1 John 2:17 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Trouble comes to everyone, but feeling miserable is no reason to make others miserable. Lord, may I never destroy another's happiness. With our blessings come responsibilities. Much is required of those to whom much has been given. Lord, may I use my blessings to be a blessing to others. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Trusting A Sponsor-Worth The Risk "In seeking a sponsor, most members look for someone they feel they can learn to trust, someone who seems compassionate…" IP No. 11, "Sponsorship, Revised" The idea of sponsorship may be new to us. We have spent many years without direction, relying only on self-interest, suspecting everyone, trusting no one. Now that we are learning to live in recovery, we find we need help. We can't do it alone anymore; we must take the risk of trusting another human being. Often, the first person we take that risk with is our sponsor-someone we respect, someone we identify with, someone we have reason to trust. As we open up to our sponsor, a bond develops between us. We disclose our secrets and develop confidence in our sponsor's discretion. We share our concerns and learn to value our sponsor's experience. We share our pain and are met with empathy. We get to know one another, respect one another, love one another. The more we trust our sponsor, the more we trust ourselves. Trust helps us to move away from a life of fear, confusion, suspicion, and indirection. In the beginning, it feels risky to trust another addict. But that trust is the same principle as apply in our relationship with a Higher Power-risky or not, our experience tells us we can't do without it. And the more we take the risk of trusting our sponsor, the more open we will feel about our lives. Just for today: I want to grow and change. I will risk trusting my sponsor and find the rewards of sharing. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. There is a proper balance between not asking enough of oneself and asking or expecting too much. --May Sarton The boy's mother baked pies that morning before he was up. She left them on the back porch to cool, their warm aroma curling up through his bedroom window. His mouth was full of the smell when he woke. Before she left for work, she said, "You may do anything you want today, anything at all. Except for one thing--don't step in those pies." All day the boy could not get the pies out of his mind; his feet itched just thinking about them. Don't step in those pies. He heard her voice inside his head. By late afternoon he could control it no longer. One, two, three, four, five, six--his foot fell squarely into the middle of each pie. When we expect the worst from others, we often get just that. The same goes for our expectations of ourselves. And when we trust others, it too is returned. Do I expect the best of others--and myself--today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. As long as I am constantly concerned about what I "ought" to say, think, do, or feel, I am still the victim of my surroundings and am not liberated. ... But when I can accept my identity from God and allow him to be the center of my life, I am liberated from compulsion and can move without restraints. --Henri J. M. Nouwen As we get more settled in our recovery, we are more vulnerable to becoming rigidly ruled by ideas of behavior, which should serve as guidelines, not moral edicts. If we find ourselves saying we should pass the message of recovery to others, perhaps the spirit of the program is missing. If we are telling ourselves we should go to meetings but don't feel the benefit, perhaps we have lost the spiritual path. Our powerlessness is the source of vitality in our relationship with God. In the painful awareness that our will and our own devices get us nowhere, we can put aside the shoulds and again accept our identity from God. Today, I will set aside my shoulds and return to trust in my Higher Power. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. To believe in something not yet proved and to underwrite it with our lives; it is the only way we can leave the future open. --Lillian Smith Today stands before us, ready for our involvement. And it will offer us opportunities for personal growth and occasions to help another make progress on her path to the future. Challenges are to be expected. They further our purpose. They foster our maturity. How different it is, for many of us, to look forward today with secure anticipation, to trust in what the future holds! We can still remember, all too vividly perhaps, the darker periods in our lives, periods that seemed to hold no promise; a time when we dreaded the future, fearing it would only compound those awful times. The fear and the dread are not gone completely. They hover about us, on occasion. They no longer need to darken all of a day, however. We can recognize their presence as parts of our whole, not all of it. How free we are, today! Our choices are many. I can step toward today with assurance, reaching out to others along the way, trusting that my accumulated steps add stability to my future. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Gifts, Not Burdens Children are gifts, if we accept them. --Kathleen Turner Crilly Children are gifts. Our children, if we have children, are a gift to us. We, as children, were gifts to our parents. Sadly, many of us did not receive the message from our parents that we were gifts to them and to the Universe. Maybe our parents were in pain themselves; maybe our parents were looking to us to be their caretakers; maybe we came at a difficult time in their lives; maybe they had their own issues and simply were not able to enjoy, accept, and appreciate us for the gifts we are. Many of us have a deep, sometimes subconscious, belief that we were, and are, a burden to the world and the people around us. This belief can block our ability to enjoy life and our relationships with others. This belief can even impair our relationship with a Higher Power: we may feel we are a burden to God. If were have that belief, it is time to let it go. God gives me all the willingness I need today to sit quietly and listen. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Make Each Moment Count “A picture isn’t taken in a moment,” stated the brochure for the Cottonwood Colorado hotel. “It’s taken of a moment.” It took me a long time to learn that important truth. I spent years trying to get my life together and keep it together, as though it were a solid chunk that could be arranged in a certain place, then made to stay there. It took me a long time to learn about moments. In many ways, our lives are like a movie reel, made up of individual frames and single moments each one leading into the next. It is a waste of energy to try and hold on to the moments of the past. By the time we begin reaching for them, they’re gone. It is just as poor timing to try to jump into moments that have not arrived yet– the future. Stay in the present moment, the frame you’re in now. That’s the only moment where happiness, joy, and love can be found. And remember to make each moment count. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Say whatever with as much love as you can There’s an old story about compassion, detachment, and Mohammed, the prophet of Islam. Mohammed had a neighbor who had a garbage problem. This neighbor was a cranky old man who let his garbage pile up and spill out all around his yard. The mess was unsightly, but Mohammed practiced tolerance and compassion. He didn’t say anything to the annoying neighbor, for years. One day, the unsightly mess from the garbage disappeared. Mohammed went over to his neighbor’s house and knocked on the door. The neighbor answered the knock. “I got worried when I didn’t see your garbage,” Mohammed said. “I was just checking to make sure you were all right.” We need to set boundaries, be clear, and stand up for ourselves. We need to check regularly to make sure we’re taking care of ourselves. But once in a while, we also need to check to see if we’re allowing ourselves to become irritated and upset by nonessentials and forgetting the essential of love. Learn to say whatever, but learn to say it with as much compassion and love as you can. God, help me learn to take care of myself and live with passion, compassion, and an open heart. ****************************************** Unlimited Vision Everything Is in Divine Order by Madisyn Taylor Often when things are not as they seem to be, it is because we do not see the whole vision as we are asked to take baby steps. We can only see so much from where we sit in our particular bodies, in the midst of our particular lives, rooted as we are in the continuum of space and time. The divine, on the other hand, is not limited to the constructs of either space or time, and its wisdom and workings often elude us as we try to make sense of what is happening in our lives. This is why things are not always what they seem to be and even the best-laid plans are sometimes overturned. Even when we feel we have been guided by our intuition every step of the way, we may find ourselves facing unexpected loss and disappointment. At times like these, we can find some solace in trusting that no matter how bad or just plain inexplicable things look from our perspective, they are, in fact, in divine order. Even as we take our places in this earthly realm, a part of us remains completely free of the confines we face here. Regardless of what is happening in our lives, this part of us remains infused with joy and gratitude, connected to the unbroken source from which we come. Our small self, on the other hand, who is caught up in our false identity as a being limited in space and time, regards happiness as the result of things going the way it wants them to go. It is this part of us that suffers the greatest confusion and upset when the logic of events does not compute. And it is to this self that we must extend unconditional love, forgiveness, and compassion. In order to do this, we tap into our inner divinity, holding the space of a tender authority, extending love and light to our ego as a mother extends her love to a troubled child. There are many ways to access our inner divinity—meditation, prayer, chanting, channeling, and conscious breathing, to name a few. It is helpful to develop a regular practice that provides us access to this all-powerful, healing presence, as it can be difficult to reach once we are in a stressful position, if we have not already established a connection. The more connected we are with this part of ourselves, the more we share its unlimited vision and the secure, knowing that all the things of our life, no matter how they appear, are in a state of divine and perfect order. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I know today that getting active means trying to live the suggested Steps of The Program to the best of my ability. It means striving for some degree of honesty, first with myself, then with others. It means activity directed inward,m to enable me to see myself and my relationship with my Higher Power more clearly. As I get active, outside and inside myself, so shall I grow in The Program. Do I let others do all the work at meetings? Do I carry my share? Today I Pray May I realize that “letting go and letting God” does not mean that I do not have to put any effort into The Program. It is up to me to work the Twelve Steps, to learn what may be an entirely new thing with me — honesty. May I differentiate between activity for activity’s sake — busy-work to keep me from thinking – - and the thoughtful activity which helps me to grow. Today I Will Remember “Letting God” means letting Him show us how. ****************************************** One More Day This confrontation, with death . . . makes everything look so precious, so sacred, so beautiful, that I feel more strongly than ever the impulse to live it, to embrace it, and let myself be overwhelmed by it. – Abraham Maslow When we are ill, we are forced to face our own mortality. A close brush with death is enough to put the fear of dying into us, but with this fear a sense of spiritually may flow through our lives. Problems, which once seemed overwhelming diminish in size. The trees are greener, the sky is bluer. People are kinder and more sharing than ever before. We often don’t miss what we’ve taken for granted until it’s nearly yanked away from us. All of a sudden, every day is a gift. Every day is precious chance to live. I am continuing the struggle to make each day the best one because I rejoice in the gift of life. ************************************ Food For Thought Cobwebs and Illusions We compulsive overeaters react to refined sugar and starches as an alcoholic reacts to alcohol. When we were overeating, our thinking was foggy. The more we ate, the more confused we became. We often lived in a world of cobwebs and illusions and were unable to separate fact from fantasy. This cloudy thinking caused all sorts of complications in our relationships with others and lowered our general level of efficiency. We found ourselves becoming very angry and irrational when events did not go our way. We often made life miserable for our families, taking out our anger on them. Sometimes we escaped into a world of fantasy where we would be omnipotent and where our every whim would be indulged. When we came to OA and began to practice rigorous honesty, we discovered that in order to be honest we had to abstain from the kind of eating which confused our thinking. It is amazing how abstinence can clear away cobwebs and illusions! Thank You, Lord, for sanity. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Victimization "Within each of us lies the power of our consent to health and to sickness, to riches and to poverty, to freedom and to slavery. It is we who control these, and not another.” Richard Bach I have lived most of my life believing that I was a victim of circumstance. As a “victim” I believed I had no power, no options, no choices, no hope and no control in my life. It’s so tempting to be a victim. If I’m a victim, I am not responsible for anything. Every pain, every dysfunction, every addiction, every problem was not my “fault” and there was nothing I could do to improve my life. Or so I thought. One day a friend asked me if I actually wanted to be well and I was shocked to find that the immediate answer flooding from my heart was, “NO.” Wow! You would think that a victim would give anything in order to be well, yet I found that I was terrified of the responsibility of being well. If I were well, I would be in charge of my own choices – particularly the most primal choices of all: Life or Death, holding onto powerlessness, or reaching out to grasp hope and health. I am still tempted to return to the false security of victim-hood. Yet I come to recovery, and keep coming back. I work the program, I learn, I fail, I fall. I rise again and begin again. One day at a time... I will remember that I have the power, the freedom, and the responsibility to make choices which move me towards health. I will resist the siren call of victimization. Lisa V. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Your candidate may give reasons why he need not follow all of the program. He may rebel at the thought of a drastic housecleaning which requires discussion with other people. Do not contradict such views. Tell him you once felt as he does, but you doubt whether you would have made much progress had you not taken action. - Pg. 94 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Our anger often depicts the struggle we face in withdrawal. It seems our anger explodes over nothing. But in our hearts we know we want our DRUG and we're angry we can't have it. We stay clean, go to meetings, talk to our sponsor or counselor, and the anger passes. May the Light of recovery outshine my anger of withdrawal as I live from hour to hour in the first month. Silver Linings I search for silver linings, for the deeper meaning of the events in my life. Life is my teacher if I can learn to read the subtle messages that are laced into the circumstances that I co-create around me. I will look for the lesson. When life offers up its inevitable challenges, I will try to understand what I am meant to see that I am not seeing, what I am meant to hear that I am not hearing, what I am meant to know that I am not knowing. There is always a silver lining if I look for it. Even if I don't see it readily, I trust that it is there and that it will reveal itself to me over time. Life isn't simple. One of the ways that I can grow from life's adversities, is to see what is positive about a difficult situation, to look for the silver lining. I can grow in joy and in pain. It doesn't need to be one or the other because pain can transform into joy. It can be the fire that clears the field for new and tender growth. There is always a silver lining. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Many people think that the Twelve Steps are the work. But they are not. The Twelve Steps are the preparation for doing the real work. The real work is in reaching out to the still suffering alcoholic and addict.'God has no hands but yours.' (attributed to Mother Theresa). I become the hands of my Higher Power. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you treat people badly today, you get to reap the benefits tomorrow. Time for Joy - Book - Quote God gives me all the willingness I need today to sit quietly and listen. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Two things an alcoholic doesn't like; The way things are...and change. - Anon.
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March 27
Daily Reflections A.A.'s FREEDOMS We trust that we already know what our several freedoms truly are; that no future generation of AAs will ever feel compelled to limit them. Our AA freedoms create the soil in which genuine love can grow. . . . LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 303 I craved freedom. First, freedom to drink; later, freedom from drink. The A.A. program of recovery rests on a foundation of free choice. There are no mandates, laws or commandments. A.A.'s spiritual program, as outlined in the Twelve Steps, and by which I am offered even greater freedoms, is only suggested. I can take it or leave it. Sponsorship is offered, not forced, and I come and go as I will. It is these and other freedoms that allow me to recapture the dignity that was crushed by the burden of drink, and which is so dearly needed to support an enduring sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day You get the power to overcome drinking through the fellowship of other alcoholics who have found the way out. You get power by honestly sharing your past experience by a personal witness. You get power by coming to believe in a Higher Power, the Divine Principle in the universe which can help you. You get power by working with other alcoholics. In these four ways, thousands of alcoholics have found all the power they needed to overcome drinking. Am I ready and willing to accept this power and work for it? Meditation For The Day The power of God's spirit is the greatest power in the universe. Our conquest of each other, the great kings and conquerors, the conquest of wealth, the leaders of the money society, all amount to very little in the end. But one that conquers oneself is greater than one who conquers a city. Material things have no permanence. But God's spirit is eternal. Everything really worth while in the world is the result of the power of God's spirit. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may open myself to the power of God's spirit. I pray that my relationships with others may be improved by this spirit. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Room For Improvement, p. 86 We have come to believe that A.A.'s recovery Steps and Traditions represent the approximate truths which we need for our particular purpose. The more we practice them, the more we like them. So there is little doubt that A.A. principles will continue to be advocated in the form they stand now. If our basics are so firmly fixed as all this, then what is there left to change or to improve? The answer will immediately occur to us. While we need not alter our truths, we can surely improve their applications to ourselves, to A.A. as a whole, and to our relation with the world around us. We can constantly step up the practice of "these principles in all our affairs." Grapevine, February 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places If it works, don't fix it. Accepting life. A lot of things in life are all right just as they are. This is hard to understand in a world that puts high value on improvement and progress, but since there are so many things that do need fixing, it's best not to tamper with things that are working. Sometimes we think something should be changed in another person's life. Two AA members decided, for example, that a mutual AA friend deserved higher status employment than what he was doing. They seized upon an unusual profession that seemed to fit his talents and interests, and were disappointed and even a bit offended when he decided he wasn't interested. He continued to follow his regular trade until his retirement thirty years later. In truth, there had really been nothing that needed "fixing" in his choice of a vocation. He had been earning a living doing very honest but difficult work. It was somewhat presumptuous of his friends to outline a new career for him, and it could have led to considerable harm. Let's leave people and things alone unless our help is requested and something really does need fixing. I'll look around today and notice the things in my life that are working well and really don't need changing. Then I'll focus my attention on the things that really should be fixed. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The secret success is constancy of purpose. --- Benjamin Disraeli In Twelve Step meetings, we don't talk about counseling, treatment centers, or non-program reading. Many of us have been helped in these ways, but we shouldn't confuse them with Twelve Step programs. We must keep our Twelve Step programs pure, no matter what is in style among counselors or at treatment centers, or what the latest books say. Certainly, we should use these sources if they help us, but not in our program meetings. There, we must stick to the basics that have helped addicts recover all over the world for many years. Steps, traditions, meetings, sponsorship---these things work, no matter what is in style. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, let me be there to help an addict in need, by sharing my Twelve Step program. Action for the Day: I will help out today be being a sponsor or by calling a new member, just to say hello. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning It takes time, love, and support to find peace with the restless one. --Deidra Sarault Restlessness is born of frustration. Perhaps we want to move ahead with our lives more quickly. Does a job have us trapped? Do past troubles haunt us still? Maybe perfectionism tarnishes every attempt to achieve. We can learn from our restlessness, if we let it guide us to our inner reservoir of peace and spiritual support. The search for serenity often takes us farther from it. We mistakenly think a different job or home or relationship will answer all our needs. But we find that our restlessness has accompanied us to our new surroundings. Peace has its home within. And prayer opens the door to it. In the stillness of our patience, we are privy to its blessing. Restlessness indicates our distance from our higher power. It may be time for a change in our lives. Change is good; however, our relationship with God will vouchsafe any needed changes. Restlessness is self-centered and will only hamper the steps we may need to take. Restlessness is a barometer that reveals my spiritual health. Perhaps prayer is called for today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES Our loyalty and the desire that our husbands hold up their heads and be like other men have begotten all sorts of predicaments. We have been unselfish and self-sacrificing. We have told innumerable lies to protect our pride and our husbands’ reputations. We have prayed, we have begged, we have been patient. We have struck out viciously. We have run away. We have been hysterical. We have been terror stricken. We have sought sympathy. We have had retaliatory love affairs with other men. p. 105 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Man Who Mastered Fear He spent eighteen years in running away, and then found he didn't have to run. So he started A.A. in Detroit. I came from a good family. I believe the sociologists would call it upper middle class. By the time I was twenty-one, I had had six years of life in foreign countries, spoke three languages fluently, and had attended college for two years. A low ebb in the family fortunes necessitated my going to work when I was twenty. I entered the business world with every confidence that success lay ahead of me. I had been brought up to believe this, and I had shown during my teens considerable enterprise and imagination about earning money. To the best of my recollection, I was completely free from my abnormal fears. Vacations from school and from work spelled "travel" to me---and I traveled with gusto. During my first year out of college, I had endless dates and went to countless dances, balls, and dinner parties. p. 246 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." When evening comes, perhaps just before going to sleep, many of us draw up a balance sheet for the day. This is a good place to remember that inventory-taking is not always done in red ink. It's a poor day indeed when we haven't done something right. As a matter of fact, the waking hours are usually well filled with things that are constructive. Good intentions, good thoughts, and good acts are there for us to see. Even when we have tried hard and failed, we may chalk that up as one of the greatest credits of all. Under these conditions, the pains of failure are converted into assets. Out of them we receive the stimulation we need to go forward. Someone who knew what he was talking about once remarked that pain was the touchstone of all spiritual progress. How heartily we A.A.'s can agree with him, for we know that the pains of drinking had to come before sobriety, and emotional turmoil before serenity. pp. 93-94 ************************************************** ********* God, help me let go of my need to create drama to have a life. --Melody Beattie Be quicker with a compliment than words that criticize. Kindness builds you up. Meanness cuts you down in size. --Terri He will take it all, if you just learn to give... Put it in God's Hands... and you will start to live! --Lori W. You dwell always in the heart of God. --John-Roger "We don't ask God for too much; in fact, we ask for too little. Turn to Him for everything. Give everything to God." --Marianne Williamson Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation GUILT "It is all one to me if a man comes from Sing Sing or Harvard. We hire a man not his history." -- Henry Ford So often we can get so locked into our history --- what we did, what we said, the events of which we were ashamed --- that we miss the gift of the new day. Those of us who suffer from the disease of addiction need to deal with past problems but not live in them. Our attitude towards today need not be based on what happened yesterday. Today is the beginning of the rest of our lives. Today I know that I create most of the pain and tragedy in my life, but I also know that I create the joys and successes. I am confident that my sobriety makes me a winner. Lord, I forgive myself for yesterday and look forward to the healing that comes with today. ************************************************** ********* "Agree with God, and be at peace; in this way good will come to you." Job 22:21 "I am he who comforts you." Isaiah 51:12 "God is able to provide you with every blessing in abundance, so that by always having enough of everything, you may share abundantly in every good work." 2 Corinthians 9:8 "The joy of the Lord is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Be wise enough to thank God for not giving you some of the things you've asked for and gracious enough to gratefully enjoy what He gave you in its place. Lord, You know better than I what is right and best for me. If you are not happy with what you have, how will you be happy with what you want to have? Lord, may I appreciate the good things in my life and refuse to feel sorry for myself or compare myself to others. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Looking For The Assets "In accordance with the principles of recovery we try not to judge, stereotype, or moralize with each other" Basic Text p. 11 How many times in our recovery have we misunderstood the behavior of another, immediately formed a judgment, applied a label, and neatly tucked the individual into a pigeonhole? Perhaps they had developed a different understanding of a Power greater than themselves than we had, so we concluded their beliefs were unspiritual. Or maybe we saw a couple having an argument; we assumed their relationship was sick, only to find out later that their marriage had prospered for many years. Thoughtlessly tossing our fellows into categories saves us the effort of finding out anything about them. Every time we judge the behavior of another, we cease to see them as potential friends and fellow travelers on the road to recovery. If we happened to ask those we are judging if they appreciate being stereotyped, we would receive a resounding "no" in response. Would we feel slighted if this were done to us? Yes, indeed. Our best qualities are what we want others to notice. In the same way, our fellow recovering addicts want to be well thought of. Our program of recovery asks us to look positively at life. The more we concentrate on the positive qualities in others, the more we'll notice them in ourselves. Just for today: I will set aside my negative judgments of others, and concentrate instead on appreciating the favorable qualities in all. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. We like someone because, we love someone although. --Henri de Montherlant Families are like scissors. They are joined in the middle but often spread wide apart, moving away from each other. When we're not feeling close to other family members--when it's hard even to like them--it seems as though we'll never come together again. But pity the scrap of paper that comes between our scissor blades! The scissors works together again and slices the trouble clean. When trouble threatens our family, we can slice it through if we move together in love and acceptance. No matter our small differences, we are part of the same living organism, in a way. The family we live in has been together for many generations, and we are just the most recent members. When we look at one another, we see the products of centuries of love. When I feel distant from my family, can I locate where we are still joined together? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Man is in love And loves what vanishes; What more is there to say? --W. B. Yeats Throughout our lives we repeatedly make attachments and lose them. We are taken with the rich color of leaves in the fall, but we know that this beauty will soon be replaced with stark, empty branches. We give ourselves to caring for a baby, knowing someday this person will say good bye to make his or her own life. We lie close to our lover in a special moment, yet we know that this, too, will be limited by the years of our lives. We want to defiantly say, "No! If I can't have permanence I'll take nothing at all!" Most of us have wished we could outmaneuver life with such a power play. The loss feels so painful we might think holding back our love will save us pain. But holding back brings a greater unhappiness. When we submit to it, life is generous in its kaleidoscope of forms. Each attachment, each loss, is followed by more rewards and attachments. Loss and death itself are part of life. There is peace in accepting and living fully in the cycle of seasons. God, help me to engage with life fully and to accept change. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It takes time, love, and support to find peace with the restless one. --Deidra Sarault Restlessness is born of frustration. Perhaps we want to move ahead with our lives more quickly. Does a job have us trapped? Do past troubles haunt us still? Maybe perfectionism tarnishes every attempt to achieve. We can learn from our restlessness, if we let it guide us to our inner reservoir of peace and spiritual support. The search for serenity often takes us farther from it. We mistakenly think a different job or home or relationship will answer all our needs. But we find that our restlessness has accompanied us to our new surroundings. Peace has its home within. And prayer opens the door to it. In the stillness of our patience, we are privy to its blessing. Restlessness indicates our distance from our higher power. It may be time for a change in our lives. Change is good; however, our relationship with God will vouchsafe any needed changes. Restlessness is self-centered and will only hamper the steps we may need to take. Restlessness is a barometer that reveals my spiritual health. Perhaps prayer is called for today. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. After Burn How could I do it? How could I say it? Even though I meant it, I still feel ashamed, guilty, and afraid. This is common reaction to new, exciting recovery behaviors. Anything to do with owning our power and taking care of ourselves can trigger feelings of shame, guilt, and fear. We do not have to allow these feelings to control us. They're a backlash. They're after burn. Let them burn out. When we start confronting and attacking feelings and messages, we will experience some after burn. The after burn is what we allowed to control us all our life - shame and guilt. Many of us grew up with shame-based messages that it wasn't okay to take care of ourselves, be honest, be direct, and own our power with people. Many of us grew up with messages that it wasn't okay to be who we were and resolve problems in relationships. Many of us grew up with the message that what we want and need isn't okay. Let it all burn off. We don't have to take after burn so seriously. We don't let the after burn convince us that we are wrong and don't have a right to take care of ourselves and set boundaries. Do we really have the right to take care of ourselves? Do we really have the right to set boundaries? Do we really have the right to be direct and say what we need to say? You bet we do. Today, I will let any after burn which sets in after I practice a new recovery behavior, burn off. I will not take it so seriously. God, help me let go of my shame and needless fears about what will happen to me if I really start caring for and loving myself. I am good enough...just the way I am. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Resentments Hurt Everybody Resentments only hurt ourselves. Not true. Resentments can hurt others,too. When we brood and allow resentments to brew and fester, we send negative, mean, hurtful, spiteful energy to others. The more consciously and vividly we do this, the more pain we can cause everyone. The more bonded we are with others, whether they’re business associates, friends, lovers, or family members, the more powerfully our resentments can impact them as well as us. So if you’re busy thinking resentful thoughts about someone close to you on the job or at home, consider the harm you are doing to him or her. The more powerful the emotions connected to these thoughts and the closer you are to the person, the more damage you can do. You can sabotage the other person, help keep him or her down. Even if you don’t speak your resentments aloud, even if you try to hide the way you feel, the energy is there in the air hurting both of you, just as we focus on clearing the air we breathe of toxins, we need to cleanse the air around us at work and at home from the toxic fumes of resentment. Remember, when we harbor hate, jealousy, or rage, we connect to others in ways that hurt us all. Let’s set others free. Let’s release our resentments. Along the way, we’ll set ourselves and our hearts free,too. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Set yourself free I’ll let go tomorrow; I’m having too much fun torturing myself today. No, that’s not really it. I’ll let go tomorrow; the things I’m holding on to need me to hold them today. Yes, that’s closer to what it is. I’m not enjoying myself at all today, but I have to keep holding on to my desires, my guilt, my limitations, and my worries. I am defined by them. And you want me to let go of them today? Sorry, maybe tomorrow. And so we hold on. And the ulcer grows. And the pain in our hearts from unfulfilled expectations keeps gnawing away at us. What we’re really putting off is the freedom we get from letting go. Yes, I know that what you’re holding on to is important. Everything that I have ever had to let go of was important to me, too. If it wasn’t important, letting go wouldn’t be a struggle. We’d just put it down and walk away. You’ve been given today. Will you use it or will you miss out on today’s wonder because you’re to preoccupied with holding on to things that are beyond your control? God, help me let go,today. ****************************************** In God’s Care I do not believe one can settle how much we ought to give. I am afraid the only safe rule is to give more than we can spare. ~~C.C. Lewis In this hectic life, demands are constantly made on us–demands on our time, our attention, our skills. There are demands on all our resources, both spiritual and material. How can we meet all the demands? When we try, aren’t we in danger of spreading ourselves too thin and not being able to satisfy anybody, including ourselves? We learn, though, both from God and from experience, that the secret of happiness is in giving. It is the heart and soul of our spiritual life. We are always happiest when we are giving–of ourselves, our possessions, our money, our time, our attention, our tolerance, our patience, our appreciation, and our love. It is hard to give too much. The more we give of ourselves, the more we give to ourselves. I will give as much as I can, and a little bit more. ****************************************** Doing for Others Solace in Service by Madisyn Taylor So many times, when we are being of service to others, we find the answer or solution to our own problems. When we feel bad, often our first instinct is to isolate ourselves and focus on what’s upsetting us. Sometimes we really do need some downtime, but many times the best way to get out of the blues quickly is to turn our attention to other people. In being of service to others, paradoxically, we often find answers to our own questions and solutions to our own problems. We also end up feeling more connected to the people around us, as well as empowered by the experience of helping someone. When we reach out to people we can help, we confirm that we are not alone in our own need for support and inspiration, and we also remind ourselves that we are powerful and capable in certain ways. Even as our own problems or moods get the better of us sometimes, there is always someone else who can use our particular gifts and energy to help them out. They, in turn, remind us that we are not the only people in the world with difficulties or issues. We all struggle with the problems of life, and we all feel overwhelmed from time to time, but we can almost always find solace in service. In the most ideal situation, the person we are helping sheds light on our own dilemma, sometimes with a direct piece of advice, and sometimes without saying anything at all. Sometimes just the act of getting our minds out of the obsessive mode of trying to figure out what to do about our own life does the trick. Many great inventors and artists have found that the inspiration they need to get to the next level in their work comes not when they’re working but when they’re walking around the block or doing dishes. We do ourselves and everyone else a great service when we take a break from our sorrows and extend ourselves to someone in need. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Storing up grievances is not only a waste of time, but a waste of life that could be lived to greater satisfaction. If I keep a ledger of “oppressions and indignities,” I’m only restoring them to painful reality. “The horror of that moment” the King said, “*I shall never, never forget.” “You will though,” said the Queen, “if you don’t make a memorandum of it.” (Lewis Carroll. Through The Looking Glass) Am I keeping a secret storehouse for the wreckage of my past? Today I Pray God keep me from harboring the sludge from the past — grievances, annoyances, grudges, oppressions, wrongs, injustices, putdown,s slights, hurts. They will nag at me and consume my time in rehashing what I “might have said” or done until I face each one, name the emotion it produced in me, settle it a best I can — and forget it. May I empty my storehouse of old grievances. Today I Will Remember Don’t rattle old bones. ****************************************** One More Day Patience is the best remedy for every trouble. – Plautus We are used to the quick fix. Candy bars hold back our hunger. Credit cards allow us to spend freely when we are financially strapped. We drive through the fast-food lanes and eat on the way to our next stop. And when we were told about our illness, our reaction may have been, “Okay, Now how can it be fixed?” We were told that part of the treatment was time, a remedy requiring patience and one difficult to accept. We are learning to accept that the nature of our illness requires us to be patient. We can use this patience to slow the value of each passing minute. Our time becomes more and more precious as we understand that patience is a very good remedy. Today I can begin to practice patience. ************************************ Food For Thought Finding Our Place I did not create this world, nor did I create myself. I do not know what the outcome of my life will be, or even what will happen to me next week. If I try to manipulate reality and arrange circumstances to suit myself, I become frustrated and unhappy I cannot control reality, but I can change myself to be more in harmony with it. When I accept a food plan and follow it, I am slowly adjusting my body and my appetite to what is best for my health and well-being. I have tried the other way--adjusting my intake of food to the demands of my appetite--and the result is disaster and chaos in my life. In OA, we follow a program which is sound and which has worked for thousands of compulsive overeaters like ourselves. We stop trying to make everything go according to our desires, and we start learning how to live in the real world. With the guidance of our Higher Power, we find our place. I trust Your guidance. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Forgiveness "To err is human, to forgive is divine." Alexander Pope When most of us first came into Program, we carried around a great deal of shame, guilt, and resentment. This made it very difficult for us to forgive ourselves, or others, for various past transgressions. We usually must rely on the forgiveness and support of other Program members before we come to a point of being able to truly forgive ourselves. Coming to the point of self-forgiveness is a crucial step because once we have achieved it for ourselves, we can finally come to the stage of maturity to begin to forgive others. By offering true forgiveness we can begin to release the plethora of harbored resentments that have poisoned our souls and hindered our recovery for so many years. One Day at a Time . . . I will work towards learning to forgive myself so that I might eventually learn to forgive others. Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote It works -- it really does. - Pg. 88 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Fragments of our addiction never stop calling, 'Hey, just one won't hurt; look, what's so wrong with going to that party; it's disloyal to stop seeing old friends.' But those of us who've been around awhile recognize the 'callings' for what they are. Give the 'calls' an inch and we KNOW addiction takes a mile. When my mind is niggled with addiction excuses for setting myself up, may I follow program advice and call my sponsor or counselor. Life's Generosity I appreciate the generosity of life. Everywhere I look, the world is spilling forth abundance. I open my hand to receive and the world fills it up with something. Whether it's sunlight, sweet smells or the gift of another day, this world is constantly giving forth. Today I say a quiet thank you for all that the world provides. For sunsets, fresh air and flowers. For rain and people and pets. My arms aren't big enough to hold it all, so today I will appreciate just what I have, knowing that appreciating what I can hold will feel more wonderful than running after more than I can carry. I feel grateful for the gifts of this world - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Most of our growth in recovery takes time. You may, like many of us, want to be restored to wholeness yesterday. However, you can afford to be patient. After all, when the Universe made time, it made plenty of it. I give time, time. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Sponsor's question: Who's not doing it your way today? Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am good enough just the way I am. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Our defects are like the bars of a cage. The central point is not to study the bars, but get out of the cage. - Anon.
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March 28
Daily Reflections EQUALITY Our membership ought to include all who suffer from alcoholism. Hence we may refuse none who wish to recover. Nor ought A.A. membership ever depend upon money or conformity. Any two or three alcoholics gathered together for sobriety may call themselves an A.A. group, provided that, as a group, they have no other affiliation. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 565 Prior to A.A., I often felt that I didn't "fit in" with the people around me. Usually "they" had more/less money than I did, and my points of view didn't jibe with "theirs." The amount of prejudice I had experienced in society only proved to me just how phony some self -righteous people were. After joining A.A., I found the way of life I had been searching for. In A.A. no member is any better than any other member; we're just alcoholics trying to recover from alcoholism. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When you come into an A.A. meeting, you're not just coming into a meeting, you're coming into a new life. I'm always impressed by the change I see in people after they've been in A.A. for a while. I sometimes take an inventory of myself, to see whether I have changed and if so, in what way. Before I met A.A., I was very selfish. I wanted my own way in everything. I don't believe I ever grew up. When things went wrong, I sulked like a spoiled child and often went out and got drunk. Am I still all get and no give? Meditation For The Day There are two things we must have if we are going to change our way of life. One is faith, the confidence in things unseen, that fundamental goodness and purpose in the universe. The other is obedience, that is living according to our faith, living each day as we believe God wants us to live, with gratitude, humility, honesty, purity, unselfishness and love. Faith and obedience, these two, will give us all the strength we need to overcome sin and temptation and to live a new and more abundant life. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may have more faith and obedience. I pray that I may live a more abundant life as a result of these things. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Keystone of the Arch, p. 87 Faced with alcoholic destruction, we became open-minded on spiritual matters. In this respect alcohol was a great persuader. It finally beat us into a state of reasonableness. << << << >> >> >> We had to quit playing God. It didn't work. We decided that hereafter, in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He would be the Principal; we, His agents. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new triumphal arch through which we passed to freedom. Alcoholics Anonymous 1. p. 48 2. p. 62 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Keep coming back.. it works if you work it. Fortitude A popular self-help book noted that there is tremendous power in repetition.... like the tap-tap-tap of a hammer that finally drives the nail through a board. AA works in much the same way; attendance at meetings is the steady tap-tap-tap that helps bring about lasting sobriety and personal improvement. Attending meetings is also much like attending school. Nobody learns everything in one classroom session, and it's also true that the student must put forth an effort to learn. We should accept AA as something that will gradually grow on us if we become part of it and apply ourselves to its principles. The willingness to continue attending meetings is some evidence of sincerity and commitment. We discover that there are few meetings that bring us world-shaking revelations and experiences, but as we keep coming back and working the program, our own lives will improve steadily. This is the result of many meetings, not just a few. I'll do everything possible today to strengthen my sobriety and my understanding of the program. Rather than seeking shortcuts, I'll be grateful for steady progress. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple God is not a cosmic bellboy.---Harry Emerson Fosdick We have to laugh when we look back at the times we treated God like our servant. Who did we think we were, ordering God to do something for us? But we got away with it. God even did some of the things we asked. Now we know that our Higher Power is not a servant. As we work the Steps, we know we don't give orders to our Higher Power. We don't expect God to work miracles every time we'd like one. we're asking our Higher Power to lead us. After all, who knows what is best for us---our Higher Power or us? Our Higher Power has many wonderful gifts for us. Our Higher Power will show us goals, help us live in love and joy, and give us strength. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, show me ways to help others as You've helped me. I'm grateful that You love me and help me. Action for the Day: Today ,I'll make a list of times my Higher Power has helped me out of trouble. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Is there ever any particular spot where one can put one's finger and say, "It all began that day, at such a time and such a place, with such an incident"? --Agatha Christie No experience of our lives is pure, unadulterated, set apart from all other experiences. There is an eternal flow in our lives. It carries us from one moment, one experience, into the next. Where we are today, the growth we have attained as recovering women and the plans we have for further changes are prompted by the same driving desires that contributed to our many actions in years gone by. We can reflect on a particular experience and tag it a turning point. However, neither a lone prescription nor a single martini opened the door we passed through when we chose recovery. But they each may have played a part, and it's the many parts of our lives, past and present, that guarantee us the turning points that nudge us further up the mountain. We will see the summit. And we will understand how, each time we stumbled, new strength was gained. Every day is a training ground. And every experience trains me to recognize the value of succeeding experiences. With richness, I am developing, one moment at a time. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES Our homes have been battle-grounds many an evening. In the morning we have kissed and made up. Our friends have counseled chucking the men and we have done so with finality, only to be back in a little while hoping, always hoping. Our men have sworn great solemn oaths that they were through drinking forever. We have believed them when no one else could or would. Then, in days, weeks, or months, a fresh outburst. p. 105 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Man Who Mastered Fear He spent eighteen years in running away, and then found he didn't have to run. So he started A.A. in Detroit. Suddenly all this changed. I underwent a shattering nervous breakdown. Three months in bed. Three more months of being up and around the house for brief periods and in bed the rest of the time. Visits from friends that lasted over fifteen minutes exhausted me. A complete checkup at one of the best hospitals revealed nothing. I heard for the first time an expression that I was to grow to loathe: "There is nothing organically wrong." Psychiatry might have helped, but psychiatrists had not penetrated the Middle West. p. 246 - 247 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." As we glance down the debit side of the day's ledger, we should carefully examine our motives in each thought or act that appears to be wrong. In most cases our motives won't be hard to see and understand. When prideful, angry, jealous, anxious, or fearful, we acted accordingly, and that was that. Here we need only recognize that we did act or think badly, try to visualize how we might have done better, and resolve with God's help to carry these lessons over into tomorrow, making, of course, any amends still neglected. p. 94 ************************************************** ********* God, help me be so clear on who I am that I can generously afford to let other people be who they are, too. Help me to set aside my defensive behavior, and teach me to blend with other people and see their point of view while not relinquishing my own. --Melody Beattie If you learn from your suffering, and really come to understand the lesson you were taught, you might be able to help someone else who's now in the phase you may have just completed. Maybe that's what it's all about after all . . . --Anonymous God, help me search myself to see if I'm holding on to blame for myself or someone else. If I am, help me get it out in the open, then help me let it go. --Melody Beattie "Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it's holy ground. There's no greater investment." --Stephen Covey Those who are at war with others are not at peace with themselves. --William Hazlitt Memories are made when you spend quality time with someone you love. Make a memory today! ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FUTURE "The future is hidden even from the men who made it." -- Anatole France Life is a glorious mystery. We can never fully understand it and it will always confuse and amaze us. After we have understood one thing, we are presented with a fresh problem. We are not perfect. We are not God. We will never understand completely. Some years ago this used to anger and irritate me. I wanted to know everything. I wanted to have the answer to all life's problems. I wanted the "power" that comes with perfection. I hated being vulnerable, weak and confused! I hated being human. Yes, that was my problem. I hated being a human being. Today I am enjoying the adventure of life, and I kneel in awe at its mingled complexity. Today life is a paradox that I can live with. Help me to accept the mystery of life. ************************************************** ********* The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: And he delighteth in his way. Psalm 37:23 These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world, ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. John 16:33 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer. Psalm 19:14 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Faith is complete surrender to the will of God and acceptance of His plan for us. Lord, You carry me through each moment of my day. Learn to be peaceful in all situations and trust that through all stages of our lives, God has a plan. Lord, may I have the wisdom to be able to turn my stumbling blocks into building blocks. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Facing Feelings "We may fear that being in touch with our feelings will trigger an overwhelming chain reaction of pain and panic." Basic Text p. 29 While we were using, many of us were unable or unwilling to feel many emotions. If we were happy, we used to make us happier. If we were angry or depressed, we used to mask those feelings. In continuing this pattern throughout our active addiction, we became so emotionally confused that we weren't sure what normal emotions were anymore. After being in recovery for some time, we find that the emotions we had suppressed suddenly begin to surface. We may find that we do not know how to identify our feelings. What we may be feeling as rage may only be frustration. What we perceive as suicidal depression may simply be sadness. These are the times when we need to seek the assistance of our sponsor or other members of NA. Going to a meeting and talking about what is happening in our lives can help us to face our feelings instead of running from them in fear. Just for today: I will not run from the uncomfortable emotions I may experience. I will use the support of my friends in recovery to help me face my emotions. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I have a feeling I should paint what I am supposed to paint. So I sit. And there my hand moves and I made a picture. --Norval Morrijeau The writer sits, head in hands, amid a mound of crumpled paper wads. The deadline is tomorrow and not even the first paragraph is written. The writer has been working nonstop since the early morning hours. Frustration pushes the writer up from the chair and out on a long walk in the woods to the stream. After an hour of plunging through lush woods, a rest by the stream listening to the sounds of the rippling water is refreshing. Back at the typewriter, the fingers move, the words flow, the job is done. Sometimes we need to quiet ourselves to let our inner resources flow through our outer noise. We are always doing what we are supposed to do. Even when things don't seem to come together just right, there is a purpose; even if only to let us know we need to do something else for a while. How much simpler our lives can be if we only have the faith to accept what happens as a guidepost along a path that is naturally correct. Am I frustrated with something I should step away from? You are reading from the book Touchstones. There is nothing stronger in the world than gentleness. --Han Suyin It may take a while to learn to be gentle with ourselves. We have long standing patterns of abusing and shaming ourselves. Maybe we became this way because we were victims. Now it's easier to attack ourselves for mistakes we've made than to be accountable and make amends. We think we deserve to be rejected if we let our friends know our deepest secrets. In the midst of stress we fly to self doubt and self abusing thoughts. We withdraw emotionally, we pout, we expect rejection rather than gentleness. For today, let us pledge to be gentle with ourselves. Gentleness isn't dishonest; it isn't arrogant or self-centered. It is taking reality - with whatever pain that includes - and treating ourselves as worthwhile men. We will be stronger and less self centered when we accept this gentleness. We will be as loyal to ourselves as we are to our best friends. Each day with this new attitude will build strength of character and wisdom. Today, may I treat myself with gentleness and learn the strength it has to teach me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Is there ever any particular spot where one can put one's finger and say, "It all began that day, at such a time and such a place, with such an incident"? --Agatha Christie No experience of our lives is pure, unadulterated, set apart from all other experiences. There is an eternal flow in our lives. It carries us from one moment, one experience, into the next. Where we are today, the growth we have attained as recovering women and the plans we have for further changes are prompted by the same driving desires that contributed to our many actions in years gone by. We can reflect on a particular experience and tag it a turning point. However, neither a lone prescription nor a single martini opened the door we passed through when we chose recovery. But they each may have played a part, and it's the many parts of our lives, past and present, that guarantee us the turning points that nudge us further up the mountain. We will see the summit. And we will understand how, each time we stumbled, new strength was gained. Every day is a training ground. And every experience trains me to recognize the value of succeeding experiences. With richness, I am developing, one moment at a time. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Balance Seek balance. Balance emotions with reason. Combine detachment with doing our part. Balance giving with receiving. Alternate work with play, business with personal activities. Balance tending to our spiritual needs with tending to our other needs. Juggle responsibilities to others with responsibilities to ourselves. Balance caring about others with caring about ourselves. Whenever possible, lets be good to others, but be good to ourselves too. Some of us have to make up for lost time. Today, I will strive for balance. I am at choice today. I can watch my negative thoughts go by and replace them with positive thoughts and compassion. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Discover New Beliefs The drive from Zion National Park to Bryce Canyon in utah was a short one. I had traveled the same route several times. At a certain pass, no matter how sunny the day and cloudless the sky, it was raining there every time. Although it was hard to see, a small dark cloud seemed to hang over this one particular place, this one area of the road, all the time. It may be like that in a particular area of our lives. A certain belief seems almost stuck to us, stuck to one area of our lives, and no matter how sunny the rest of the drive, it’s raining there all the time. What cloud is hanging over you? Could it be one you’re helping to create? Some beliefs– My choices are wrong. I make bad decisions, I’m wrong– can create a dark heaviness that hangs over us like a cloud. These beliefs may be so subtle we don’t notice them. What we do notice is a lingering pain or anxiety, a cloud that seems to follow us around. What we don’t see is that we’re helping create and maintain our own cloud with these beliefs. The lesson may not be to make better decisions or be a better person. The lesson may be much simpler: change your beliefs. Make some new decisions. Let yourself discover some new, better, sunnier beliefs about yourself and your life. Allow yourself to believe that the decisions you make are fine. Who you are is okay. You always have been. ****************************************** The Language of Letting Go Balance Seek balance. Balance emotions with reason. Combine detachment with doing our part. Balance giving with receiving. Alternate work with play, business with personal activities. Balance tending to our spiritual needs with tending to our other needs. Juggle responsibilities to others with responsibilities to ourselves. Balance caring about others with caring about ourselves. Whenever possible, let’s be good to others, but be good to ourselves too. Some of us have to make up for lost time. Today, I will strive for balance. ****************************************** In God’s Care The essence of prayer, even of a mystical experience is the way we are altered to see everything from its life-filled dimension. ~~Matthew Fox Prayer can change us dramatically. It can open our eyes to the intricate beauty in the things and people in our life. Prayer can help us see the people we pray for–whether friend or adversary–with greater clarity and love. Our gratitude for friends is heightened; our resentment toward adversaries lessens. Barriers mysteriously disappear when we look upon our enemies prayerfully. The Eleventh Step suggests that prayer may be as simple as asking for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out. We therefore seek God’s presence anywhere we are and in anyone we’re with. This is prayer as action, as a commitment to fully invest ourselves in life. When prayer is how we live our life, we are able to honor whatever life gives us by responding with acceptance and hope. Today I will look upon the people and events in my life prayerfully, and be open to the riches I am afforded. ****************************************** Things We Don’t Want to Do Outside the Comfort Zone by Madisyn Taylor Most often, after you have completed something you didn't want to do, you wonder why you were so worried in the first place. Most of us have had the experience of tackling some dreaded task only to come out the other side feeling invigorated, filled with a new sense of confidence and strength. The funny thing is, most of the time when we do them, we come out on the other side changed and often wondering what we were so worried about or why it took us so long. We may even begin to look for other tasks we’ve been avoiding so that we can feel that same heady mix of excitement and completion. Whether we avoid something because it scares us or bores us, or because we think it will force a change we’re not ready for, putting it off only creates obstacles for us. On the other hand, facing the task at hand, no matter how onerous, creates flow in our lives and allows us to grow. The relief is palpable when we stand on the other side knowing that we did something even though it was hard or we didn't want to do it. On the other hand, when we cling to our comfort zone, never addressing the things we don’t want to face, we cut ourselves off from flow and growth. We all have at least one thing in our life that never seems to get done. Bringing that task to the top of the list and promising ourselves that we will do it as soon as possible is an act that could liberate a tremendous amount of energy in our lives. Whatever it is, we can allow ourselves to be fueled by the promise of the feelings of exhilaration and confidence that will be the natural result of doing it. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day We must think deeply of all those sick persons still to come to The Program. As they try to make their return to faith and to life, we want them to find everything in The Program that we have found yet more, if that be possible. No care, no vigilance, no effort to preserve The Program’s constant effectiveness and spiritual strength will ever be too great to hold us in full readiness for the day of their homecoming. How well do I respect the Traditions of The Program? Today I Pray God help me to carry out my part in making the group a lifeline for those who are still suffering from addictions, in maintaining the Steps and the Traditions which have made it work for me for those who are still to come. May The Program be a “homecoming” for those of us who share the disease of addiction. May we find common solutions to the common problems which that disease breeds. Today I Will Remember To do my Part. ****************************************** One More Day It is not death or pain that is to be dreaded, but the fear of pain or death. – Epictetus The pain we anticipate — whether it be a flu shot, a lengthy dental procedure, or surgery — is usually worse than the actual pain. Perhaps this is because the anticipation of pain includes fear or dread. As we deal with pain, we may find healthier ways to cope with it. Once, even the sense of headache coming might have caused us to tense our muscles and prepare for the onslaught. Now, we’re more likely to settle down to begin thinking of positive imagery or relaxation therapy. We are giving ourselves the moments we need to be alone, to breathe deeply, to think of a beautiful and calming sight. We’re learning to relax and be less fearful. I need to remind myself of my personal power. I can exercise control over my body and strive to minimize the effect of fear. ************************************ Food For Thought Avoiding Trouble Staying out of the kitchen as much as possible is a good way for the compulsive overeater to avoid trouble. If fast food restaurants are a problem, then visit them as infrequently as you can, or keep away from them altogether. With planning, we can arrange for the food we need without placing ourselves in situations of great temptation. If the family is having something not on our program, we can substitute a simple meal for ourselves which fits our food plan. Sometimes we may need to get out of the house entirely while a particular food is being served. Whenever possible, we stay away from temptation. We strengthen our resolve and refresh our spirits by frequently making phone calls to other OA members, attending meetings, and reading the literature. As we progress in our program, we are bothered less and less by the foods which we have chosen to avoid. Our new way of eating and living is so much more satisfying than our old habits that we have no desire to jeopardize it. Lead us away from temptation. ***************************************** One Day At A Time GRATITUDE "Gratitude is a fruit of a great civilization ~ you do not find it among gross people." Samuel Johnson Samuel Johnson's quote from the TOUR OF THE HEBRIDES could easily have been written about The Recovery Group. The attitude of gratitude is an absolutely crucial tool to a successful recovery. Gratitude is the measure of our appreciation for what we've been given. We in Program have SO much for which we should be thankful. We stand on the shoulders of giants - we are indebted to those members who've proceeded us in Program and handed down the tools, wisdom and resources - the bedrock upon which our recovery is based. We are indebted to our HP, our sponsors, to those who do service in innumerable ways at the Recovery Group and - to each other - for mutual love and support - and for our precious gift of recovery. Be grateful for each day - each moment. One Day at a Time . . . I will continue to practice the attitude of gratitude and learn to forgive others. Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our TWELFTH SUGGESTION: Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill. - Pg. 89 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Keeping life simple right now is imperative. You need to learn how not to use mind-affecting chemicals. You do this by following instructions. That's all. Your family problems, job instability, or other concerns must take a back seat until you stabilize yourself. Let me realize that my thinking is not balanced enough now to solve past problems. May I stow away my concerns for the first 30 days. Appreciating Life I have the gift of life. I am here. I am alive, with all of my senses and able to experience the magic of this incredible world. Whatever this day has in store for me - I am open to receive. I will act on my day and allow my day to act on me. I am open. I will take steps that I know will make my day feel good, productive and pleasurable, and then I will let the rest happen. Each day presents me with gifts and surprises, if I know how to unwrap the present - if I remember how to be pleased, moved and astonished by the wonders of this world. Life itself is the gift - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Do not be quick to call all therapy 'psycho-babble' and think that mental health experts do not understand. Therapy can be the guide that leads you to the discovery of your anchor amidst the surrounding storms of life. In the words of Bill Wilson, I should 'never belittle a good doctor or psychiatrist'. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you aren't happy today, what are you waiting for? Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am at choice today. I can watch my negative thoughts go by and replace them with positive thoughts and compassion. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I began to see that my insanity is not the crazy, stupid things I do when I'm drinking. It's the insane idea that this time it's going to be different, the idea that: 'Only two drinks, that's all I'm going to take.' or: 'One drink won't hurt me.' - Charlie P.
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March 29
Daily Reflections TRUSTED SERVANTS They are servants. Theirs is the sometimes thankless privilege of doing the group's chores. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 134 In Zorba the Greek, Nikos Kazantzakis describes an encounter between his principle character and an old man busily at work planting a tree. "What is it that you are doing?" Zorba asks. The old man replies: "You can see very well what I am doing, my son, I'm planting a tree." "But why plant a tree," Zorba asks, "if you won't be able to see it bear fruit?" And the old man answers: "I, my son, live as though I were never going to die." The response brings a faint smile to Zorba's lips and, as he walks away, he exclaims with a note of irony: "How strange -- I live as though I were going to die tomorrow!" As a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, I have found that the Third Legacy is a fertile soil in which to plant the tree of my sobriety. The fruits I harvest are wonderful: peace, security, understanding and twenty-four hours of eternal fulfillment; and with the soundness of mind to listen to the voice of my conscience when, in silence, it gently speaks to me, saying: You must let go in service. There are others who must plant the harvest. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Before I met A.A. I was very dishonest. I lied to my wife constantly about where I had been and what I'd been doing. I took time off from the office and pretended I'd been sick or gave some other dishonest excuse. I was dishonest with myself, as well as with other people. I would never face myself as I really was or admit when I was wrong. I pretended to myself that I was as good as the next fellow, although I suspected I wasn't. Am I now really honest? Meditation For The Day I must live in the world and yet live apart with God. I can go forth from my secret times of communion with God to the work of the world. To get the spiritual strength I need, my inner life must be lived apart from the world. I must wear the world as a loose garment. Nothing in the world should seriously upset me, as long as my inner life is lived with God. All successful living arises from this inner life. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may live my inner life with God. I pray that nothing shall invade or destroy that secret place of peace. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Will Power And Choice, p. 88 "We A.A.'s know the futility of trying to break the drinking obsession by will power alone. However, we do know that it takes great willingness to adopt A.A.'s Twelve Steps as a way of life that can restore us to sanity. "No matter how grievous the alcohol obsession, we happily find that other vital choices can still be made. For example, we can choose to admit that we are personally powerless over alcohol; that dependence upon a 'Higher Power' is a necessity, even if this be simply dependence upon an A.A. group. Then we can choose to try for a life of honesty and humility, of selfless service to our fellows and to 'God as we understand Him.' "As we continue to make these choices and so move toward these high aspirations, our sanity returns and the compulsion to drink vanishes," Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Stick with the winners Making the Right Choices In the world of drinking, people lead each other down paths of further destruction. In the world of AA, that same destructive process can still go on through wrong thinking. It's possible for AA members to encourage resentments, criticism, gossip, and other dead-end practices. That's why people are urged to "stick with the winners" in order to find and maintain sobriety. Seek out people who are doing well in the program, people whose progress is noticeable and admirable. The can be of real help as sponsors, as friends, or simply as role models. It's important to remember that the winners can be from all walks of life. The first AA member in Detroit earned only a modest living, while the second Detroit member became a wealthy manufacturer after finding sobriety. In AA terms, both men were winners. They stayed sober, they stayed active in the fellowship, and they helped others. "Sticking with the winners" does not mean we should shun people who are having difficulty with the program. It does mean we should avoid accepting ideas and ways of living that do not lead to sobriety. I'll spend time in the company of people who have a good record of following the program. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Whatever is in the heart will come up to the tongue.---Persian proverb During our illness, we wouldn't let people get close to us. We spoke of what was in our heart. And much of what filled our heart was sadness, anger, and hopelessness. Those who want to be close to us heard what was in our heart. In short, we had become our illness. Recovery is about changing what's in our heart. We open our hearts up to our Higher Power. The first three Steps are about honesty and needing others. They're about turning our will and our lives over to a Higher Power. If you're wondering where you are with these Steps, listen to the words you speak. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, keep my heart open to the first three Steps. Action for the Day: Today, I'll work at really listening to what I have to say. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Love is an expression and assertion of self-esteem, a response to one's own values in the person of another. --Ayn Rand The struggle to love one another may be a daily one for us, and it is made more difficult because we are still stumbling in our attempts at self-love. Many of us have lived our whole adult lives feeling inadequate, dull, unattractive, fearing the worst regarding our relationships with others. But this phase, this struggle, is passing. We see a woman we like in the mirror each morning. We did a task or a favor yesterday that we felt good about. And when we feel good about our accomplishments, we look with a loving eye on the persons around us. Self-love does encourage other love. Self-love takes practice. It's new behavior. We can begin to measure what we are doing, rather than what we haven't yet managed to do, and praise ourselves. Nurturing our inner selves invites further expression of the values that are developing, values that will carry us to new situations and new opportunities for accomplishments, and finally to loving the woman who looks back at us every morning. Self-love makes me vulnerable and compassionate towards others. It's the balm for all wounds; it multiplies as it's expressed. It can begin with my smile. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES We seldom had friends at our homes, never knowing how or when the men of the house would appear. We could make few social engagements. We came to live almost alone. When we were invited out, our husbands sneaked so many drinks that they spoiled the occasion. If, on the other hand, they took nothing, their self-pity made them killjoys. p. 105 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Man Who Mastered Fear He spent eighteen years in running away, and then found he didn't have to run. So he started A.A. in Detroit. Spring came. I went for first walk. Half a block from the house. I tried to turn the corner. Fear froze me in my tracks, but the instant I turned back toward home, this paralyzing fear left me. This was the beginning of an unending series of such experiences. I told our family doctor---an understanding man who gave hours of his time trying to help me---about this experience. He told me that it was imperative that I walk around the entire block, cost me what it might in mental agony. I carried out his instructions. When I reached a point directly back of our house, where I could have cut through a friend's garden, I was almost over powered by the desire to get home, but I made the whole journey. Probably only a few readers of this story will be able, from personal experiences of their own, to understand the exhilaration and sense of accomplishment I felt after finishing this seemingly assignment. p. 247 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." But in other instances only the closest scrutiny will reveal what our true motives were. There are cases where our ancient enemy, rationalization, has stepped in and has justified conduct which was really wrong. The temptation here is to imagine that we had good motives and reasons when we really didn't. p. 94 ************************************************** ********* People always ask, "How did you succeed?" Simply put, I chose not to fail. --Xernona Clayton "Real friendship is shown in times of trouble; prosperity is full of friends." --Euripides Honesty gets us sober, tolerance keeps us sober. --Bill W. "To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved." --George MacDonald "The principles you live by create the world you live in; if you change the principles you live by, you will change your world." --Blaine Lee "Many a man curses the rain that falls upon his head, and knows not that it brings abundance to drive away hunger." --St. Basil "If the only prayer you say in your life is 'thank you,' that would suffice." --Meister Eckhart ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation OPINIONS "Opinions cannot survive if one has no chance to fight for them." -- Thomas Mann An opinion is worth fighting for, and I have opinions on a great number of subjects --- as a result of sobriety. Drugs have a tendency to make insane remarks appear brilliant; the drunk is always the unsung poet or victimized genius when he is "in alcohol". I did not have opinions when I was drinking but rather a series of chaotic and incoherent reactions. But today I have considered opinions. I am able to think and make decisions. I am able to make a contribution to life and the world in which I live. I am involved. More than this, today I have the spiritual confidence to fight for what I believe and "speak out" my concerns in love. Today I am alive and I love it --- also I love me. Let me always hear the opinions of others but not fail to express my own. ************************************************** ********* Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Romans 12:2 'Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved; for thou art my praise." Jeremiah 17:14 "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." I Corinthians 10:13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Few things are worthy of worry and fewer are worthy of anger. Lord, bless me with patience for my circumstances and wisdom to overcome the obstacles. We only have so much time and so much energy in a day. To use it grumbling leaves less time for enjoyment and accomplishment. Lord, may I focus on looking for Your blessings in every part of my life. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Our Own True Will "God's will for us consists of the very things we most value. God's will... becomes our own true will for ourselves." Basic Text p. 46 It's human nature to want something for nothing. We may be ecstatic when a store cashier gives us back change for a twenty though we only paid with a ten. We tend to think that, if no one knows, one small deception won't make any difference. But someone does know—we do. And it does make a difference. What worked for us when we used, frequently doesn't work long in recovery. As we progress spiritually by working the Twelve Steps, we begin to develop new values and standards. We begin to feel uncomfortable when we take advantage of situations that, when we used, would have left us gloating about what we had gotten away with. In the past, we may have victimized others. However, as we draw closer to our Higher Power, our values change. God's will becomes more important than getting away with something. When our values change, our lives change, too. Guided by an inner knowledge given us by our Higher Power, we want to live out our newfound values. We have internalized our Higher Power's will for us—in fact, God's will has become our own true will for ourselves. Just for today: By improving my conscious contact with God, my values have changed. Today, I will practice God's will, my own true will. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Drag your thoughts away from your troubles . . . by the ears, by the heels or any other way you can manage it. It's the healthiest thing a body can do. --Mark Twain It requires very little effort--and no imagination--to start feeling sorry for ourselves. Often, it is easy to feel sorry for ourselves in our families. Instead of being inspired by the sports talents of an older brother, the popularity of a lovely sister, or the fame of a parent or relative, we often take the easier attitude: "I'm denied all that he or she has." If we work hard at developing our own abilities so that we can excel, we will find ourselves proud of, and applauding, what others do. If a personal problem brings us self-pity, we must remind ourselves that all people have problems. We can cope as well as the best of people if we learn from them and think positively. Who among those close to me can I be proud of today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Restless man's mind is, So strongly shaken In the grip of the senses... Truly I think The wind is no wilder. --Bhagavad Gita What passions have swept away our reasoning powers? What lust have we pursued at the cost of our values and better judgment? As men in this program, we know the ferocious winds of addiction and codependency. Now we are in a program of recovery, learning to combine our sensual side with our mind and our morals. Every day we feel the winds of our senses, and they are part of what gives us life. We can let them blow and not be carried away by them. In this way we take pleasure in being human beings and men. We have our minds, our thoughts, and our knowledge to turn to for guidance. And we have our inner voice - our Higher Power - on which we can rely through even the wildest hurricane. I am learning to make room in life for my senses, my mind, and my Higher Power. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Love is an expression and assertion of self-esteem, a response to one's own values in the person of another. --Ayn Rand The struggle to love one another may be a daily one for us, and it is made more difficult because we are still stumbling in our attempts at self-love. Many of us have lived our whole adult lives feeling inadequate, dull, unattractive, fearing the worst regarding our relationships with others. But this phase, this struggle, is passing. We see a woman we like in the mirror each morning. We did a task or a favor yesterday that we felt good about. And when we feel good about our accomplishments, we look with a loving eye on the persons around us. Self-love does encourage other love. Self-love takes practice. It's new behavior. We can begin to measure what we are doing, rather than what we haven't yet managed to do, and praise ourselves. Nurturing our inner selves invites further expression of the values that are developing, values that will carry us to new situations and new opportunities for accomplishments, and finally to loving the woman who looks back at us every morning. Self-love makes me vulnerable and compassionate towards others. It's the balm for all wounds; it multiplies as it's expressed. It can begin with my smile. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Getting Needs Met Picture yourself walking through a meadow. There is a path opening before you. As you walk, you feel hungry. Look to your left. There's a fruit tree in full bloom. Pick what you need. Steps later, you notice you're thirsty. On your right, there's a fresh water spring. When you are tired, a resting place emerges. When you are lonely, a friend appears to walk with you. When you get lost, a teacher with a map appears. Before long, you notice the flow: need and supply; desire and fulfillment. Maybe, you wonder, someone gave me the need because someone planned to fulfill it. Maybe I had to feel the need, so I would notice and accept the gift. Maybe closing my eyes to the desire closes my arms to its fulfillment. Demand and supply, desire and fulfillment - a continuous cycle, unless we break it. All the necessary supplies have already been planned and provided for this journey. Today, everything I need shall be supplied to me. God gives me all the strength and courage to accept whatever happens in my life today. It is so freeing to know that I am no longer a victim of people, places and things. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Move Gently into Forgiveness “I never knew how much I blamed and hated myself. I never knew how much shame and self-contempt I picked up from situations I’d been through until I really forgave myself and felt how that feels,” one woman said to me. Loving yourself, forgiving yourself, accepting yourself– all of these feel different from judging yourself. Many of us have lived with so much judgement of ourselves that we take these feelings for granted. We just think that’s how we’re doomed to feel. Until we do forgive ourselves, we don’t realize how much we need to, and how good, how great, how absolutely terrific that feels. I was leery of forgiveness for many years. I thought forgiving implied judging. And because judging was wrong and I shouldn’t do it, I didn’t need to forgive. The problem was, whether right or wrong, I had judged myself. And now I needed forgiveness. Self-judgements set us apart, separate us from the rest of the world in an undesirable way. Forgiving ourselves reconnects us to the world, to God, to ourselves. We can forgive ourselves for what we’ve done wrong, what we’ve done badly, and what we think we could have done better. We can transcend our judgements of ourselves. Move gently into forgiveness. Love, forgive, and accept yourself. See how connected you feel. See how free you really are and always have been. See how much better you feel! ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Thy will be done You can clear the land, plow the field, spread the fertilizer, and plant the corn. but you cannot make it rain. You cannot prevent an early frost. You cannot determine exactly what will happen in your life. The rain may or may not fall, but one thing is certain: you will get a harvest only if you planted something in the field. It’s important to do everything in our power to ensure our success, but we also need to let the universe take its course. Getting mad won’t help. Dwelling on a situation only takes energy away from us, while yielding few positive results. The Serenity Prayer comes to mind. It begins:”Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.” Clear the land, plow the field, plant the crop, and then let go. Things will work out, sometimes the way we want them to, sometimes not. But they will work out. Sometimes all you can do is shrug your shoulders, smile, and say whatever. Thy will, not mine, be done. God, help me take guided action, then surrender to your will. Help me remember that true power comes from aligning my will, intentions, and desires with you. ****************************************** In God’s Care We are born helpless. As soon as we are fully conscious we discover loneliness. We need others physically, emotionally, intellectually; we need them if we are to know anything, even ourselves. People today are taught at an early age to be self-sufficient. Independence is considered a strength, and dependence a weakness. As a result, we come to believe that we can make it on our own. And we can, but at what cost? Many of us fill our loneliness with chemical substances, Humans are social creatures; we need each other for physical and emotional support, and for a healthy exchange of ideas. Even more, we need each other for spiritual development. God loves us equally and often speaks to us through one another. We truly learn about our spiritual nature in the loving acts we exchange I am never lonely when showing someone that I care. ****************************************** Alive in Joy Dispelling Drama by Madisyn Taylor Some people are so used to creating drama that a peaceful existence seems uncomfortable for them. There are scores of people in the world who seem to be magnets for calamity. They live their lives jumping from one difficult to the next, surrounded by unstable individuals. Some believe themselves victims of fate and decry a universe they regard as malevolent. Others view their chaotic circumstances as just punishments for some failing within. Yet, in truth, neither group has been fated or consigned to suffer. They are likely unconsciously drawing drama into their lives, attracting catastrophe through their choices, attitudes, and patterns of thought. Drama, however disastrous, can be exciting and stimulating. But the thrill of pandemonium eventually begins to frustrate the soul and drain the energy of all who embrace it. To halt this process, we must understand the root of our drama addiction, be aware of our reactions, and be willing to accept that a serene, joyful life need not be a boring one. Many people, so used to living in the dramatic world they create, feel uncomfortable when confronted with the prospect of a lifetime of peace and contentment. The drama in their lives serves multiple purposes. Upset causes excitement, prompting the body to manufacture adrenaline, which produces a pleasurable surge of energy. For those seeking affection in the form of sympathy, drama forms the basis of their identity as a victim. And when drama is familial, many people believe they can avoid abandonment by continuing to play a key role in the established family dynamic. The addiction to drama is fed by the intensity of the feelings evoked during bouts of conflict, periods of uncertainty, and upheaval. Understanding where the subconscious need for drama stems from is the key to addressing it effectively. Journaling can help you transfer this need from your mind onto a benign piece of paper. After repeated writing sessions, your feelings regarding the mayhem, hurt feelings, and confusion often associated with drama become clear. When you confront your emotional response to drama and the purpose it serves in your life, you can reject it. Each time you consciously choose not to take part in dramatic situations or associate with dramatic people, you create space in your inner being that is filled with a calm and tranquil stillness and becomes an asset in your quest to lead a more centered life. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day What is the definition of humility? “Absolute humility,” said AA co-founder Bill W., “would consist of a state of complete freedom from myself, freedom from all the claims that my defects of character no lay so heavily upon me. Perfect humility would be a full willingness, in all times and places, to find and to do the will of God” Am I striving for humility? Today I Pray May God expand my interpretation of humility beyond abject subservience or awe at the greatness of others May humility also mean freedom from myself, a freedom which can come only through turning my being over to God’s will. May I sense the omnipotence of God, which is simultaneously humbling and exhilarating. May I be willing to carry out His will. Today I Will Remember Humility is freedom. ****************************************** One More Day Happiness should not depend on physical wellness. – K. o’Brien Without even recognizing that we have done so, we sometimes structure our entire lives on the foundation of good health. We assume good health for our future. And we refuse to even acknowledge that nature’s somewhat random selection process can change the way we live. We may never even give a moment’s thought to changing our habits because of illness. We feel exempt, confident it will never happen to us. And when it does and our lifestyle changes — sometimes gradually, sometimes abruptly — we feel we’ve lost the right to happiness. Then we begin to adjust. Family and friends stick with us, and an awareness comes forth that they, not physical activity, are the reasons for true happiness. I accept and will adjust to chronic illness. Poor health has changed my life not ended it. ************************************ Food For Thought Slow Success We say that there are no failures in OA, only slow successes. Some of us take longer than others to catch on to the program. It is important to keep trying, to continue to attend as many meetings as possible, and to refuse to become discouraged. There are some of us who spent months and years experimenting before we were finally able to accept abstinence and stay with it. Sometimes we left the program for a time, until we realized how much we needed OA and came back to try again. When we have accepted the program and maintained abstinence, yet found weight loss to be extremely slow, it is easy to become discouraged. It helps to remember that we are not only losing weight--however slowly--we are also learning a new way of life. Our spiritual and emotional growth in this program is even more rewarding than the eventual weight loss. By living each day as it comes and working the Twelve Steps, we achieve the serenity and confidence that make us satisfied with slow success. May I be granted patience and persistence. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ISOLATION “Isolation is the sum total of wretchedness to a man.” Thomas Carlyle This past summer I was forced to play "catch-up" at work in order to compensate for time lost while recovering from a serious ankle injury. As a result of my increased responsibilities, I stopped touching base with my friends and family -- Program family included -- except via the occasional email or phone call. Fortunately, my friends and my sponsor are not the "shrinking violet" types. They took me to task about my whereabouts and well being. Because COE is a disease of isolation, it's extremely important to make sure we're making contact with others. We do this by using the tools of the Program: sharing with our support group, meetings, and sponsor. When we don’t allow ourselves to have regular, daily social outflow and personal accountability – even with a good excuse – we are more likely to relapse. One day at a time... I will make a determined effort to connect and share with others. Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote If a mere code of morals or a better philosophy of life were to overcome alcoholism, many of us would have recovered long ago. But we found that such codes and philosophies did not save us, no matter how much we tried. We could wish to be moral, we could wish to be philosophically comforted, in fact, we could will these things with all our might, but the needed power wasn't there. Our human resources, as marshalled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly. - Pg. 45 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Anger is one letter short of Danger. ( Dolores ) I Will Be Me I will be me, today. One thing I never seem to do well at, is trying to be someone else. I can imitate and learn from others, but I cannot be them. Only they know how to do that, it's a natural outgrowth of all that they have experienced in life, of all they are. That's the bad news. The good news is no one can be me as well as me. Being me builds on who I already am. It's exercise for my personality and my spirit. If I allow myself to actualize my own unique gifts and visions they will have originality to them, a freshness. I am a better me than anyone else can be - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote In the words of Wayne Dryer 'You will be happy to know that the universal law that created miracles has not been repealed.' I Expect a Miracle today. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book There is an easy answer to your problem that is neat, plausible, and wrong. Time for Joy - Book - Quote God gives me all the strength and courage to accept whatever happens in my life today. It is so freeing to know that I am no longer a victim of people, places and things. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Relationships: I've learned how to get into them and now how to get out of them. Now all I've got to do is learn how to do the bit in the middle. - Lochie.
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March 30
Daily Reflections OUR GROUP CONSCIENCE ". . . sometimes the good is the enemy of the best." ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS COMES OF AGE, p. 101 I think these words apply to every area of A.A.'s Three Legacies: Recovery, Unity and Service! I want them etched in my mind and life as I "trudge the Road of Happy Destiny" (Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 164). These words, often spoken by co-founder Bill W., were appropriately said to him as the result of the group's conscience. It brought home to Bill W. the essence of our Second Tradition: "Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern." Just as Bill W. was originally urged to remember, I think that in our group discussions we should never settle for the "good," but always strive to attain the "best." These common strivings are yet another example of a loving God, as we understand Him, expressing Himself through the group conscience. Experiences such as these help me to stay on the proper path of recovery. I learn to combine initiative with humility, responsibility with thankfulness, and thus relish the joys of living my twenty-four hour program. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Before I met A.A., I was very unloving. From the time I went away to school, I paid very little attention to my mother and father, I was on my own and didn't even bother to keep in touch with them. After I got married, I was very unappreciative of my spouse. Many a time I would go out all by myself to have a good time. I paid too little attention to our children and didn't try to understand them or show them affection. My few friends were only drinking companions, not real friends. Have I gotten over loving nobody but my self? Meditation For The Day Be calm, be true, and be quiet. Do not get emotionally upset by anything that happens around you. Feel a deep, inner security in the goodness and purpose in the universe. Be true to your highest ideals. Do not let yourself slip back into the old ways of reacting. Stick to your spiritual guns. Be calm always. Do not talk back or defend yourself too much against accusation, whether false or true. Accept criticism as well as you accept praise. Only God can judge the real you. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not be upset by the judgment of others. I pray that I may let God be the judge of the real me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Review The Day, p. 89 When we retire at night, we constructively review our day. Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest, or afraid? Do we owe an apology? Have we kept something to ourselves which should be discussed with another person at once? Were we kind and loving toward all? What could we have done better? Were we thinking of ourselves most of the time? Or were we thinking of what we could do for others, of what we could pack into the stream of life? We must be careful not to drift into worry, remorse, or morbid reflection, for that would diminish our usefulness to ourselves and to others. After we making our review, we ask God's forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 86 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Identify, don't compare Good Judgment. There's always danger in comparing ourselves with others. If we use behavior and drinking as yardsticks, such comparisons can lead us to believe that we might not really be alcoholics. This mistaken conclusion has been the undoing of some alcoholics. The better course is to identify with the problems others have in common with us. Thought drinking patterns and habits may vary between two people, individuals may at least share the fears and delusions that drinking brought. Other common factors that bind alcoholics together are emotional immaturity, a misplaced faith that alcohol solves problems, loneliness, and a tendency toward resentments. These also make good discussion topics for meetings. At the very beginning of AA, the founders had trouble coming up with a real definition of alcoholism. Since then, we've done very well be letting members "Diagnose" themselves. It's best to leave it this way: "If your drinking is a problem in your life, AA has an answer for you. Today I will not waste time comparing myself with others. Having accepted my alcoholism, I'll devote my attention to the things that enhance sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Spirituality is...the awareness that survival is a savage fight between you and yourself.---Lisa S. As recovering people, we're getting stronger each day. We go to meetings to learn how to be better people. But we also go to remind ourselves of the beast inside us---our addiction. This beast is waiting for us to slip---to go back to our addiction---so it can regain control. Thus ,it's wise to learn all we can about our disease. That's why it's important to do a good job on our Fourth Step. When we work Step Four, we learn how our addiction acts, thinks, and feels. With the help of our program, we can quiet the beast. One Day at a Time., Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I'm fighting for my life. Thanks to You, I'm winning today and my life is free. Action for the Day: I'll talk to a friend about my addiction, the beast inside me. I'll do this so it will have less power over me. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The pure relationship, how beautiful it is! How easily it is damaged, or weighted down with irrelevancies--not even irrelevancies, just life itself, the accumulations of life and of time. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh Many of us are presently rebuilding old relationships and searching for new ones, ones that we hope we can protect. We can't survive without relationships, some intimate, some close, some casual. And we discover ourselves through our relationships with others. The purity of a relationship is directly proportional to the undivided attention we both give to those shared moments, hours, experiences, to being there with one another. This communion with another is the celebration of life and God that quickens hearts and ushers in serenity. Each day I can look for those chances to give myself wholly. And gifts will abound. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES There was never financial security. Positions were always in jeopardy or gone. An armored car could not have brought the pay envelopes home. The checking account melted like snow in June. Sometimes there were other women. How heartbreaking was this discovery; how cruel to be told they understood our men as we did not! pp. 105-106 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Man Who Mastered Fear He spent eighteen years in running away, and then found he didn't have to run. So he started A.A. in Detroit. The details of the long road back to something resembling normal living---the first short streetcar ride, the purchase of a used bike, which enabled me to widen the narrow horizon of life, the first trip downtown---I will not dwell on. I got an easy, part=time job selling printing for a small neighborhood printer. This widened the scope of my activities. A year later I was able to buy a Model T roadster and take a better job with a downtown printer. >From this job and the next one with yet another printer, I was courteously dismissed. I simply did not have the pep to do hard, "cold-turkey" selling. I switched to real estate brolerage and property management work.Almost simultaneously, I discovered that cocktails in the late afternoon and highballs in the evening relieved the many tensions of the day. This happy combination of pleasant work and alcohol lasted for five years. Of course, the latter ultimately killed the former, but of this, more anon. pp. 247-248 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Ten - "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." We "constructively criticized" someone who needed it, when our real motive was to win a useless argument. Or, the person concerned not being present, we thought we were helping others to understand him, when in actuality our true motive was to feel superior by pulling him down. We sometimes hurt those we love because they need to be "taught a lesson," when we really want to punish. We were depressed and complained we felt bad, when in fact we were mainly asking for sympathy and attention. This odd trait of mind and emotion, this perverse wish to hide a bad motive underneath a good one, permeates human affairs from top to bottom. This subtle and elusive kind of self-righteousness can underlie the smallest act or thought. Learning daily to spot, admit, and correct these flaws is the essence of character-building and good living. An honest regret for harms done, a genuine gratitude for blessings received, and a willingness to try for better things tomorrow will be the permanent assets we shall seek. pp. 94-95 ************************************************** ********* For happiness brings happiness And loving ways bring love; And Giving is the treasure That contentment is made of. --Amanda Bradley Life is like a taxi. The meter just keeps a-ticking whether you are getting somewhere or just standing still. --Lou Erickson No matter what we have done, God always offers us the chance to begin anew. Knowing that God grants us a new beginning, we, too, can look at our parents, our children, our partner or our friends, anyone with whom we've had some distance, and say, "Let's have a new beginning." Love is greater than any of our mistakes. --Mary Manin Morrissey God, help me be open to all the ways you speak to me to help guide me along my path. -Melody Beattie Words are potent weapons for all causes, good or bad. --Manly Hall A blow with a word strikes deeper than a blow with a sword. --Robert Burton In our lowest moments God is with us to say, "Do not fear." --Bob Frankenburg ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation REASON "For here we are not afraid to follow wherever it may lead, nor to tolerate error so long as reason is free to combat it." -- Thomas Jefferson As an alcoholic I was so often afraid to challenge the thinking and ideas of other people. My "people pleasing" demanded peace at any price. And yet so much of what I heard, read and practiced I did not agree with. Now I see that my behavior, my attitude --- along with the alcohol consumption --- kept me sick. In my spiritual program today I am free to reject, consider and have my own opinions in life. I do not simply have to agree with everything that is said, in this way I am discovering my value and self-esteem. Lord, I am grateful for the freedom to cooperate. ************************************************** ********* "Love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another." John 13:34 'In thee, O Lord, do I put my trust.' Psalm 71 "Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7 'I will restore health unto thee, and I will heal thee of thy wounds, saith the Lord.' Jeremiah, 30:17 "The apostles said to the Lord, 'Increase our faith!' The Lord replied, 'If you had faith the size of a mustard seed, you could say to this mulberry tree, "Be uprooted and planted in the seas," and it would obey you.'" Luke 17:5-6 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Some can find fault in everything, but it takes a good and loving heart to find goodness, especially when it is less than obvious. Lord, bless me with gentleness and patience and the determination not to complain. There is much wisdom in knowing what to overlook. Lord, may I take every opportunity to praise and choose carefully when I feel the need to criticize. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today God - Centeredness "Gradually as we become more God-centered than self-centered, our despair turns to hope." Basic Text p. 92 What a glorious thing to have hope! Before coming to Narcotics Anonymous, many of us lived lives of utter hopelessness. We believed we were destined to die from our disease. Many members speak of being on a "pink cloud" their first months in the program. We've stopped using, made some friends, and life looks promising. Things are going great. Then reality sets in. Life is still life—we still lose jobs, our partners still leave us, friends still die, we still get sick. Abstinence is no guarantee that life will always go our way. When the reality of life on its own terms sets in, we turn to our Higher Power and remember that life happens the way life happens. But no matter what occurs in our recovery we need not despair, for there is always hope. That hope lies in our relationship with our Higher Power. This relationship, as expressed by the thought in our text, develops over time: "Gradually we become more God-centered." As we rely more and more on the strength of our Higher Power, life's struggles don't have to drag us into the sea of despair. As we focus more on God, we focus less on ourselves. Just for today: I will rely on my Higher Power. I will accept that, regardless of what happens, my Higher Power will provide me with the resources to live with it. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Come stand by my side where I'm going, Take my hand if I stumble and fall It's the strength that you share when you're growing That gives me what I need most of all. --Hoyt Axton The bear cub was miserable. Her father, the leader of the pack, had left a month ago to find them winter shelter and had not yet returned. Everyone went on as if nothing had changed. One evening the cub had a dream in which her father appeared and said, "Daughter, I know you grieve for me, but your burden is too heavy to carry alone. Share it with the others and let them comfort you. Sharing will only lighten your load, and if you can accept help now you will find it easier to give when others are in need." The next morning the little cub woke with a much lighter heart. As it turns out, everyone in the pack shared the same dream. There was much hugging and crying and reaching out and healing. We can easily lighten our loads by asking support from those who love us, knowing our turn to help will come. What help can I ask for today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. We all carry it within us; supreme strength, the fullness of wisdom, unquenchable joy. It is never thwarted and cannot be destroyed. But it is hidden deep, which is what makes life a problem. --Huston Smith How does a man lose touch with his strength, his wisdom, his joy? Perhaps it is in the nature of humanity. Our most profound qualities are hidden deep. They never go away, but we cannot always find them. There may be nothing wrong with ourselves as men when we lose touch. It doesn't have to mean that we are "bad guys" for getting depressed or for feeling inadequate. Who doesn't have that problem? It is the nature of life that we sometimes feel this way. This program helps us unearth the resources hidden within us. When we cannot find those reassuring feelings of strength and wisdom and joy, we may think they are gone forever. We even doubt we ever had them or could have them again. But they are still there. They cannot be destroyed. And when we regain contact we know they have been with us all along. I will have faith that the innermost places in me can never be destroyed. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The pure relationship, how beautiful it is! How easily it is damaged, or weighted down with irrelevancies--not even irrelevancies, just life itself, the accumulations of life and of time. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh Many of us are presently rebuilding old relationships and searching for new ones, ones that we hope we can protect. We can't survive without relationships, some intimate, some close, some casual. And we discover ourselves through our relationships with others. The purity of a relationship is directly proportional to the undivided attention we both give to those shared moments, hours, experiences, to being there with one another. This communion with another is the celebration of life and God that quickens hearts and ushers in serenity. Each day I can look for those chances to give myself wholly. And gifts will abound. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Experiment Experiment. Try something new. Try stepping out. We have been held back too long. We have held ourselves back too long. As children, many of us were deprived of the right to experiment. Many of us are depriving ourselves of the right to experiment and learn as adults. Now is the time to experiment. It is an important part of recovery. Let yourself try things. Let yourself try something new. Yes, you will make mistakes. But from those mistakes, you can learn what your values are. Some things we just wont like. That's good. Then well know a little more about who we are and what we don't like. Some things we will like, they will work with our values. They will work with who we are, and we will discover something important and life enriching. There is a quiet time in recovery, a time to stand still and heal, a time to give ourselves a cooling off time. This is a time of introspection and healing. It is an important time. We deal with our issues. There also comes a time when it is equally important to experiment, to begin to test the water. Recovery does not equal abstention from life. Recovery means learning to live and learning to live fully. Recovery means exploration, investigation, and experimentation. Recovery means being done with the rigid, shame based rules from the past, and formulating healthy values based on self-love, love for others, and living in harmony with this world. Experiment. Try something new. Maybe you wont like it. Maybe you'll make a mistake. But maybe you will like it, and maybe you'll discover something you love. Today, I will give myself permission to experiment in life. I will stop rigidly holding myself back, and I will jump in when jumping in feels right. God, help me let go of my need to deprive myself of being alive. When I look within, I find that I have all that I need. It feels wonderful to discover that I already am the beautiful person that I would like to be. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey to the Heart Who or What Is Pulling on You? Learn to become sensitive to the quiet as well as the clamorous pulls on your energy, your time, your emotions. You are becoming connected– to yourself, the universe, God, others– in a way you have never been before. To deny these pulls is to deny the connections. A quiet tug on our consciousness may be telling us what we need to do. We think about an old friend and contemplate calling her, but we don’t. Don’t be silly, we tell ourselves. Why would I do that now? But maybe that friend is calling out to us. Or we have a problem we haven’t known how to solve. That situation begins to work on us, bothering us, interrupting our day. Maybe our instincts are telling us it’s time to do something about it. We are living differently now, more magically, more at ease, more at one with our actions. One way we know it is time to do something not on the calendar or the clock is to pay attention to the quiet pulls on our energy. Being conscious of these impulses, then trusting ourselves to naturally know what to do and when to do it puts us in harmony with the universe and our soul. Who or what is pulling on you? What do you think you should do? Now, take it to the next step, the next level. What does your heart lead you to do? ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Go with the flow I was standing in my kitchen, many years ago, cooking Thanksgiving dinner. The children were racing around the house. I was expecting company. Dinner wasn’t coming out the way I’d planned. And then I noticed, to my dismay, that one of my acrylic nails was mssing. I looked around frantically, then realized it was most likely where I feared: inside the turkey, in the stuffing. I called my best friend and explained things to her. “Just relax,” she said, in a cheery voice I liked so much– sometimes. “Go with the flow.” “How?” I said, quietly. I don’t remember the details of how that day worked out, but it did– I think Nichole found the nail. And so did the next. And so did the next. In time the lesson became clear– learn to relax, and go with the flow. From that relaxed place, you will learn to naturally manifest your power. Some people call it ki, some chi, some the Holy Spirit, some the Way, the Tao, God’s will, or the force. Whatever we choose to call it, there’s an energy flow, a path, that will lead us through any situation we encounter in life. I spent many years resisting this flow, this universal life force. I expended a great deal of energy creating dramas around each incident that took place. I spent as much time resisting a feeling or an event as I spent dealing with it. I lived in a state of fear. The answer will appear. A solution will come to you. You’ll be led to the next place, person, or event. You’ll get the opening you need, along with the inspiration, courage, and wisdom. Feelings will come and go. The lesson isn’t that things will be okay. It’s that things are okay, right now. God, teach me how to give up resistance and go with the flow. ****************************************** In God’s Care Love the moment and the energy of the moment will spread beyond all boundaries ~~Corita Kent When we quiet our mind, bypassing our thoughts about the hour or day before, or our fear over what may come tomorrow, we can more easily relish each moment–this moment. We too often succumb to the seduction of worrying about the past and future, which are beyond our control. Our unwillingness to give up this obsessive thinking keeps the joy and serenity we long for out of reach. We forget that the power lies within us to clear our mind and to fully experience the peace of the moment. Quieting our mind requires commitment and practice. We can circumvent any thought and experience moments of peace–a peace that will become as seductive as our old obsession to worry. I will choose to give up worry today and enjoy many peace-fillled moments instead. ****************************************** Giving The Gift Of You Serving Your Community To live harmoniously, we need to be supportive and helpful to all people, creatures, and plant life that share this earth with us. While “being of service” is part of being a good citizen of the world, it also feels good to help others. When we do something for others in service, without the expectation of anything in return, we are turning our actions into offerings. There are many ways to be of service to our community. There are the obvious and much needed volunteer opportunities, such as serving Thanksgiving dinner at a shelter, mentoring our youth, or cleaning up a beach. Then, there is the kind of service that we may not even think of as being acts of service. Learning a new language (perhaps sign language) so that you can talk to more people is a way to reach out to others. Inviting someone who isn’t motivated enough to exercise on their own to join you on your daily walk is a way to give of yourself. Sharing flowers or vegetables from your garden, organizing a poetry reading, offering to babysit for a busy parent, or donating pet food to an animal shelter all are simple ways to offer your services to your community. There are many ways that you can serve the world. Imagine the impact we would have on the environment if we picked up one piece of trash off the street everyday and chose not to drive our car once a week. Even gardening tactics such as throwing wildflower seeds onto a vacant lot can brighten the lives of others – including the lives of birds and insects. Everyday, you can do something to make this world a better place. During meditation, ask for guidance on what you can do to be of service. This can be a wonderful way to start your day. Smiling at a stranger who looks down in the dumps or teaching your neighborhood kids how to whistle will impact someone’s day or even their life. Giving of yourself is the best gift that you can give. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “When I meditate upon such a vision,” Bill W. continued, “I need not be dismayed because I shall never attain it, nor need I swell with presumption that one of these days its virtues shall all be mine. I only need to dwell on the vision itself, letting it grow and even more fill my heart… Then I get a sane and healthy idea of where I stand on the highway to humility. I see that my journey towards God has scarcely begun. As I thus get down to my right size and stature, my self-concern and importance become amusing.” Do I take myself too seriously? Today I Pray May the grandiosity which is a symptom of my chemical addiction be brought back into proportion by the simple comparison of my powerlessness with the power of God. May I think of the meaning of Higher Power as it relates to my human frailty. May it bring my ego back down to scale and help me shed my defenses of pomp or bluster or secret ideas of self-importance. Today I Will Remember He is great. I am small. ****************************************** One More Day If you don’t learn to laugh at trouble, you won’t have anything to laugh at when you grow old. – Ed Howe Laughing with others is important. Learning to laugh at our own problems, however, is even more important. Since we will continue to live with situations that cause us all types of problems, we may as well learn to laugh at ourselves. Often with chronic illness, coordination changes. Reaction time may be slower. Sensitivity to cold, heat, or pain may be altered. It’s only logical that we will find ourselves in potentially embarrassing situations because of our bodies. Often, a hearty laugh at all the strange situations flung our way is just the thing to help us work through what is painful and difficult. Laughter is a gift we give to ourselves. We can carry it with us whenever we go, it will always be ours. I am headed in the right direction when I can laugh. ************************************ Food For Thought Simple Joys When we came into OA, we may have thought that we needed many material possessions, power, security, and great admiration from other people in order to be happy. We may have spent a tremendous amount of effort trying to acquire these things. Perhaps we were apparently successful, and yet were miserable because of our inability to control our eating. No amount of material possessions, fame, or prestige can alleviate the pain of compulsive overeating. Abstinence is simple. It does not require great wealth, talent, or intellectual ability. It is immediately available to all of us. When we abstain, we know the simple joy of waking up in the morning feeling good. We can live without fear of our next eating binge. We find that we enjoy our three simple meals a day much more than our former overindulgences. Through OA, we can accept ourselves and others for what we are. We do not have to impress each other. Friendship and sharing increase our joy. Thank You for the simple joys of abstinence. ***************************************** One Day At A Time DISLOYALTY "“Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship.” ..... Buddah I have a history of chaotic relationships filled with destructive drama and a lack of loyalty. For many years, however, I believed that I was in fact a very loyal friend – and that it was my friends who were disloyal to me. I was an avid -- even rabid -- people-pleaser. I drove myself crazy trying to figure out what people wanted and how I could best provide that for them. Because I thought I knew what was best for everybody, I failed to truly listen to the people in my life. Instead, I tried to impose my will upon them…then I wondered why they didn’t appreciate all of my efforts on “their” behalf. When they inevitably became frustrated with me, I was wounded by what I perceived to be their lack of loyalty to me. Only recently in my recovery program have I come to learn that my efforts at people-pleasing were actually symptoms of my own disloyalty. I was failing to relate with people as they are – rather I was relating to them as I thought they “should be”. That is perhaps the most egregious form of disloyalty…insisting that others be loyal to my concept of them and myself. Now I am taking steps to honestly listen to people and to relate with them as they are – and as I truly am. I am no longer hiding behind food. In order to be loyal in my relationships, I must be loyal to the ‘Truth of Reality.’ Only then can we share the joy of faithful relationships. One day at a time ... I will practice listening to the people in my life and I will honor them as they are. Each day I can choose to be loyal, rather than critical or people-pleasing. ~ Lisa ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Of necessity there will have to be discussion of matters medical, psychiatric, social, and religious. We are aware that these matters are, from their very nature, controversial. Nothing would please us so much as to write a book which would contain no basis for contention or argument. We shall do our utmost to achieve that ideal. - Pg. 19 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Any of us who feel insecure, inferior, or unattractive may think we drink and take other drugs to counteract this. We do drugs compulsively because we are addicted and not for other reasons; other reasons are only rationales. May I understand that fixing the 'rationales' in my life will not stop my disease. Not picking up will stop alcoholism and other addictions. Endless Opportunities I can start over each day. I can start over each hour of each day. The universe is impersonal in that sense. It's always waiting for me to tell it what I want. Like attracts like. I tell the world what I want more of, by what I am thinking and feeling right now, right this minute. Today, every hour on the hour, I will allow myself to see something positive about my day. I'll let myself send out an order by my pleasant thoughts and feelings for more of the same. When I catch myself heading down a negative path I'll stop and consciously observe what is going through my mind. Life is full of chances and so is my day. I can start it over any time I want to. I shift my life a thought at a time - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote We came here for our drugging and stay in part for hugging. Hugs are one way the fellowship demonstrates to me that it isn't 'me' and 'you' anymore, it's 'we' and 'us.' "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Don't worry about tomorrow, your Higher Power is already there. Time for Joy - Book - Quote My Higher Power is guiding me with my positive attitude today. Negatives are something I no longer choose to live with. I feel positive strength pour through me as I release all negative thoughts. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I drank to three points: Until I passed out, blacked out, or got knocked out. - JoJo S.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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