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11-16-2014, 06:40 PM | #12 | |
Super Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Hamilton, ON
Posts: 25,078
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Quote:
This is a good reading for me today, and every day after being with family. A lot of our relationships stem from our past and the distance due to age didn't allow us to bond when growing up, they were 1 and 2 when I was 5, when our house was struck by lightening, I remember they don't. I left home when I was 17, and I was 20 when my mom died and 21 when I married, and they were left to live with an alcoholic father. No alcohol was allowed in our home when mother was living and life changed when I left home. My addiction put a further distance between us, and I was not a part of their lives as they built their lives and as their families grew, I was not a part of as much as I would have liked, especially now in recovery. I have to accept that, and even though I am clean and sober, that doesn't change the fact that you can't change what you never had. You can make new bonds and new relations. You can break old bonds and mend others, but you can't build on something that is not there, especially if it is all in your own head. I think isolation was part of my DNA, and it was a way of life for me. It not only isolated my body but my spirit as well. Just because it is family doesn't mean it makes it better or that we get to reunite with them. I found that I was an alcoholic who needed Al-Anon.
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Love always, Jo I share because I care. |
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