More Recovery Readings - September

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September 30

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The house, the stars, the desert--what gives them their beauty is something that is invisible. --Antoine de Saint Exupery
What makes our home special? Is it the shape of it, or whether or not we have carpeting? Probably not.
More likely, what makes us love a place is how we feel when we are there. Home is the familiarity of pleasant smells, activities, and special people.
And when we are caught by the beauty of the stars, isn't it something that happens inside us--the breathtaking feeling of joy that is so hard to describe? The beauty of a day or a special person in our lives cannot be captured, but it can fill and warm our hearts.
Can I measure beauty today by what I feel inside?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind. --William Blake
We seek the answer. Sometimes we think we have found a central truth and later learn that beneath it is another truth. Or what seemed so crucial as a guiding principle for our lives last year is still true but not as crucial. It is like trying to take a snapshot of a changing world while the camera itself is changing.
Some of us in our hunger for security grab for "absolute" truths, which are not absolute. We must continue forever to be eager learners. In stepping across a stream from one floating log to another, we must resist the temptation to become overcommitted to staying in an especially secure looking place, or we will never reach the opposite shore. Even the Twelve Steps of this program are given to us as a "suggested" program of recovery. It is a program that works because it takes us out of our rigid ways. We are continually made new. That is the vitality of the spiritual life.
God, help me to be open to new opinions - to things I had never thought of on my own.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Birds sing after a storm; why shouldn't people feel as free to delight in whatever remains to them? --Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
We choose the lives we lead. We choose sadness or happiness; success for failure; dread or excited anticipation. Whether or not we are conscious of our choices, we are making them every moment.
Accepting full responsibility for our actions is one of the requirements of maturity. Not always the easiest thing to do, but necessary to our further development. An unexpected benefit of accepting our responsibility is that it heightens our awareness of personal power. Our well being is within our power. Happiness is within our power. Our attitude about any condition, present or future, is within our power, if we take it.
Life is "doing unto us" only what we allow. And it will favor us with whatever we choose. If we look for excitement, we'll find it. We can search out the positive in any experience. All situations present seeds of new understanding, if we are open to them. Our responses to the events around us determine whatever meaning life offers. We are in control of our outlook. And our outlook decides our future.
This day is mine, fully, to delight in--or to dread. The decision is always mine.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Not a Victim
You are not a victim.
How deeply ingrained our self-image as a victim can be! How habitual our feelings of misery and helplessness! Victimization can be like a gray cloak that surrounds us, both attracting that which will victimize us and causing us to generate the feelings of victimization.
Victimization can be so habitual that we may feel victimized even by the good things that happen to us!
Got a new car? Yes, we sigh, but it doesn't run as well as I expected, and after all, it cost so much. . . .
You've got such a nice family! Yes, we sigh, but there are problems. And we've had such hard times. . ..
Well, your career certainly is going well! Ah, we sigh, but there is such a price to pay for success. All that extra paperwork. . . .
I have learned that, if we set our mind to it, we have an incredible, almost awesome ability to find misery in any situation, even the most wonderful of circumstances.
Shoulders bent, head down, we shuffle through life taking our blows.
Be done with it. Take off the gray cloak of despair, negativity, and victimization. Hurl it; let it blow away in the wind.
We are not victims. We may have been victimized. We may have allowed ourselves to be victimized. We may have sought out, created, or re created situations that victimized us. But we are not victims.
We can stand in our power. We do not have to allow ourselves to be victimized. We do not have to let others victimize us. We do not have to seek out misery in either the most miserable or the best situations.
We are free to stand in the glow of self-responsibility.
Set a boundary! Deal with the anger! Tell someone no, or stop that! Walk away from a relationship! Ask for what you need! Make choices and take responsibility for them. Explore options. Give yourself what you need! Stand up straight, head up, and claim your power. Claim responsibility for yourself!
And learn to enjoy what's good.
Today, I will refuse to think, talk, speak, or act like a victim. Instead, I will joyfully claim responsibility for myself and focus on what's good and right in my life.


I am one of the miracles of this universe and I am connected to everything that was ever created. I can pick up the phone or sit in quiet meditation, choosing to make a contact with a friend or with my Higher Power or with both. Today I know that I am never alone. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey To The Heart
September 30
You’re a Healer

The healing you give to the world can happen as gracefully and naturally as the pine trees touch and heal with their life, their presence. Arousing your senses, they fill you with their fragrance. Their presence changes your energy, calms your fears, let you know all is well.

Know you can stand tall, joyfully be who you are, and grow where you are. You have the ability to touch those around you in a way that heals them without hurting or draining you. One of your gifts to yourself and to the world is that of a healer. You don’t have to force it, strive to make it happen. It happens gently and naturally when you love and accept who you are.

Open to your healing powers, your ability to heal yourself and those around you. Receive this gift with joy, share it freely with all you meet. Open to your healing powers and you will cherish your past, all you have gone through and done.

Who you are is love. What love does is heal.

*****

more language of letting go
Own your power

I was in an airplane on the way up. I was doing my fidgeting thing, as usual. Brady Michaels, a stunt man and sky diver I had come to know and respect, was sitting across the aisle from me.

"How are you doing Melody," he asked in a gentle way, like he really wanted to know.

"I'm scared," I said.

"Do you believe in God?" he asked.

"Yes," I said.

"Well then walk to that door, jump, and pull your rip cord when it's time," he said. "And don't forget to have some fun,too,"

Owning our power can be one of the most illusive issues we face in recovery. How much is my part? When do I do it? How much is God's part? Which parts of my life am I responsible for, and which parts are destiny?

You can spend years in therapy talking about feelings, but that isn't the same as releasing your feelings and fears and moving forward in your life. You can go to college and train to do the thing you want to do in life. You can sleep every night with your wish list underneath your pillow. But that's different from stepping up to the plate and doing it, whether that means writing a romance novel, starting your own business, learning to bake a cake, or buying an easel and painting a picture. You can read all the travel books in the library-- but that's different from getting on an airplane and taking a trip to someplace you've always wanted to see.

We can go to a million Twelve Step meetings, but that's different from actually working each of the Steps.

As my favorite skydiving instructor, Andy, told me, there's three things to remember:

Gravity always works. The earth won't move out of your way. And God won't pull your rip cord.

We've surrendered our lives and will to the care of God. Now, it's time to learn what it means to align with and own our power.

God, help me own my power to take care of myself. Help me learn to do the job well.

*****

Letting Yourself Be Seen
Being Witnessed

When we allow ourselves to be witnessed by another, we cannot help but be transformed by the experience. Whether we are sharing a personal experience, standing in front of friends to celebrate a special occasion, or expressing our unbridled joy or sorrow in front of a loved one, we are allowing ourselves to be seen and experienced in a very intimate way. Not only are we baring ourselves to someone else, but we are allowing that person to hold a very specific kind of space with us so this powerful act can take place. To be witnessed is to let ourselves be seen as we truly are in that moment.

Our friends and loved ones can easily be witnesses for us, if only we are brave enough to let them. Your next birthday may be the perfect occasion to experience this sacred act: Invite your friends and loved ones to your special day. During the celebration, stand in front of them and thank them for being there for you. Feel their gratitude, attention, warmth, and support, while noticing the sense of safety you feel as they surround you. If you feel inspired, share your innermost thoughts about the day and your life. You may be surprised at the feelings of peace and validation that arise within you, when you feel safe enough to go deep into your soul and share yourself with those you trust.

Anyone who has ever seen love, admiration, acceptance, or appreciation reflected in a friend or loved one’s eyes knows how transformative that experience can be. When you bare yourself to another, you are giving them the gift of you and showing them that they also matter. In letting yourself be witnessed, you are letting others into your intimate space, stepping in the sacred container they have created for you, and creating a cauldron of positive affirmation, support, love, and goodwill that will stay with you forever. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time
September 30

Reflection For The Day

No matter what other people do or don’t do, we have to remain sober and free from other addictions for ourselves. When our program of recovery becomes contingent on the actions or inaction of another person — especially someone with whom we’re emotionally involved — the results are invariably disastrous. We need to also remember that intense dislike is as much an emotional involvement as new found romantic love. In short, we have to cool any risky emotional involvements in the first few months of our recovery, trying to accept the fact that our feelings could change quickly and dramatically. Our watch word must be “First Things First,” concentrating on our number one problem before anything else. Am I building a firm foundation while steering a firm foundation while steering clear of slippery emotional areas?

Today I Pray

May I always remember that healthy relationships with people are necessary for my recovery. But — that substituting an obsession with either a love or hate object is as dangerous to my well-being as any other addiction.

Today I Will Remember

A dependency is a dependency is a dependency.

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One More Day
September 30

There is no failure except in no longer trying.
– Elbert Hubbard

It would be tragic to live our lives without direction, to never try to fulfill any dreams. Perhaps we have felt we do not have direction in our lives any longer, or that we can’t fulfill the lifelong dreams we had. By setting new goals and priorities in terms of today’s reality, we can still have dreams and see them come true.

We might be tempted to resign ourselves to being failures, to set ourselves no new challenges, and to think of ourselves as victims. If we don’t become fatigued with thoughts of resignation and failure, we will have the necessary energy to pursue new goals.

I am setting new goals that are realistic, and I will invest my energy in them.

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Food For Thought

Perspective

When our vision was clouded by self-will, our perspective was narrow and subjective. We saw people and events only as they fostered or frustrated our egotistical concerns. The world was a frightening place, since we thought that our welfare was entirely dependent on our own efforts.

Coming to believe in a Higher Power gives us a new, broader perspective. We learn the security of trusting eternal values and moral principles. When we pray only for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out, we begin to see ourselves as serving rather than surviving. Particular acts may or may not be successful from our point of view, but we can move on in confidence, knowing that our past, present, and future is in His hands.

The new perspective, which comes to us as we work the OA program, enables us to accept defeats as well as successes and irritations as well as satisfactions. All experience is for our growth and development.

Create in us a new perspective.