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Humor "We Are Not A Glum Lot." Share Articles, Humor, Inspirations, Jokes, News, Poems, Quotes, Writings, etc. Here. Keep It Clean Please.

 
 
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Old 08-24-2013, 03:37 PM   #1
bluidkiti
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Default Short Funny Sayings

SHORT FUNNY SAYINGS

A synonym is a word you use if you can't spell the other one.

MONEY TALKS ... but all mine ever says is GOODBYE!

I'm in shape ... round's a shape isn't it?

I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this?

I couldn't fix your brakes, so I made your horn LOUDER!

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

Hard work never hurt anyone, but why take the chance.

1st rule of intelligent tinkering - save all the parts.

SHIN - A device for finding furniture in the dark.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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