Defects of Character

[MajestyJo]

Cooperative -or- Domineering

It has been my experience that we all bring different gifts. As the saying goes, "If you only have one thought in a room, only one person is doing the thinking.

So many people don't do because they compare instead of identifying. If we all did our small part, and contribute what we can, we become part of the whole.

When I was posting the daily quotes from the Eporium, I was accused of copying and pasting too much, so I have tried to cut back and only post a couple a day. When something speaks to me, I share on it. I have found that all things don't speak to all people and as a group we are varied in our origin, addiction, and our journeys to the doors of recovery. Rather than post too much at one time, I try to spread my posts out over the course of the day.

My primary purpose is to carry the message to the addict/alcoholic who still suffers. When i couldn't come here to this site and the others I attend, because I was in the hospital, I found a big change in my attitude.

I personally, need the help of one addict, sharing with another, to stay clean and sober.

These are certainly part of my disease. Even when I am co-operating, am
people please, looking for attention, wanting to be part of the crowd that fit isn, or am I my own personality. I always feel like I have a right to express my opinion, when others do not agree, that is okay. I can agree to disagree.

I figure the best way to test group conscience, is to look to see if you have newcomers walking in your door. Are they coming back, are members taking a part in service, or all the faithful few doing all the work. Are they faithful, or are they controlling. Do they have singleness of mind, do they want what is for the Higher Good or for their own personal Gain and Goodness. Look at me people, look at what I do, am I not wonderful.

This is what people thought I was doing, and yet I was working with the new people, and when they went to another group they were told to stay away. They thought I was holding the meeting in my apartment. I didnèt even live in the building. It took about 3 years before members with some sobriety starting coming out and supporting the group.

There were 7 meeting in 6 years, and we held them for 7 years. I started them at 3 years sober, they worked for me. I went back to school and passed the group onto two others, one who got sober in the group.
I took a course to learn how to operate a computer and ended up with a certificate for business administration on computers. I learned that I did not want to go back to that kind of work, had done it for 22 years. All I wanted to do is go to meetings and carry the message. The course opened the door for me to come and share on line when I was not well enough to go to meetings.

I do not have the power to control others, unless they give up their power. I can not lose my power, unless I give it over to others. It is not my power, when I surrendered to the program, I was empowered to do what I needed to do one day at a time, to stay clean and sober.

All I can do is sew the seed, what others do with it is not up to me. All I can do is share my experience, strength, and hope. I was made to think, become aware, experience and enjoy life in a new way.

The program works, when I work it. When I do not work it, I go back into the illusion of control. In today, I choose to co-operate with others, but not at the expense of my recovery and my own personal self awareness. I can allow others to be themselves. They may not have gotten to where I am, or they are in a place, I have been to, or I have been and decided on a different journey or have been led elsewhere.

Through my God, I am guided and directed, led and given freedom of choice. I choose sobriety and my God Will. Without Him, I have nothing.

We can do what I can not do alone. I tried my way for 8 years, my way did not work. I do not want to be that person again.